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Kids, Food, and Guilt | Pauline Jansen | TEDxErasmusUniversityRotterdam


okay parents parents are the fundamental

okay parents parents are the fundamental cornerstone of our society because they

cornerstone of our society because they

cornerstone of our society because they raised the next generation by defining

raised the next generation by defining

raised the next generation by defining the rules in a household and by being

the rules in a household and by being

the rules in a household and by being the core examples for their children

the core examples for their children

the core examples for their children some are researcher on parenting

some are researcher on parenting

some are researcher on parenting practices and I’m a parent too so I know

practices and I’m a parent too so I know

practices and I’m a parent too so I know all about the worries the questions and

all about the worries the questions and

all about the worries the questions and the feelings of guilt that parents may

the feelings of guilt that parents may

the feelings of guilt that parents may have did I handle this tantrum okay

have did I handle this tantrum okay

have did I handle this tantrum okay should I set more rules should I be more

should I set more rules should I be more

should I set more rules should I be more involved or is it better to just let go

involved or is it better to just let go

involved or is it better to just let go a bit we have these questions and

a bit we have these questions and

a bit we have these questions and worries about many domains of child

worries about many domains of child

worries about many domains of child development we have them about school

development we have them about school

development we have them about school achievements about interactions with

achievements about interactions with

achievements about interactions with peers sports manners about how much

peers sports manners about how much

peers sports manners about how much children watch television what video

children watch television what video

children watch television what video games they play about sleep and of

games they play about sleep and of

games they play about sleep and of course about eating so what do we as

course about eating so what do we as

course about eating so what do we as parents do when we worry or we have

parents do when we worry or we have

parents do when we worry or we have questions we ask for advice from our own

questions we ask for advice from our own

questions we ask for advice from our own parents or friends or we look in

parents or friends or we look in

parents or friends or we look in handbooks or at the Internet and luckily

handbooks or at the Internet and luckily

handbooks or at the Internet and luckily there are hundreds of handbooks and

there are hundreds of handbooks and

there are hundreds of handbooks and websites on parenting practices

websites on parenting practices

websites on parenting practices available but today I will tell you that

available but today I will tell you that

available but today I will tell you that some of the advice that is given on the

some of the advice that is given on the

some of the advice that is given on the Indies handbooks may actually be wrong

Indies handbooks may actually be wrong

Indies handbooks may actually be wrong so I’m a psychologist and I study eating

so I’m a psychologist and I study eating

so I’m a psychologist and I study eating behaviors of children so I’m interested

behaviors of children so I’m interested

behaviors of children so I’m interested in how we can help children to develop

in how we can help children to develop

in how we can help children to develop healthy eating habits and I’m interested

healthy eating habits and I’m interested

healthy eating habits and I’m interested in how we can help parents to achieve

in how we can help parents to achieve

in how we can help parents to achieve this so they’re very two very common

this so they’re very two very common

this so they’re very two very common problems with children sitting at the

problems with children sitting at the

problems with children sitting at the kitchen table they eat too much or they

kitchen table they eat too much or they

kitchen table they eat too much or they eat too little and both drive parents

eat too little and both drive parents

eat too little and both drive parents nuts so to start with the first eating

nuts so to start with the first eating

nuts so to start with the first eating too much we all know that obesity is a

too much we all know that obesity is a

too much we all know that obesity is a worldwide problem it’s an epidemic at

worldwide problem it’s an epidemic at

worldwide problem it’s an epidemic at this epidemic often starts already

this epidemic often starts already

this epidemic often starts already in childhood and this makes parents the

in childhood and this makes parents the

in childhood and this makes parents the Gateway to solving or at least reducing

Gateway to solving or at least reducing

Gateway to solving or at least reducing the obesity rates and with my research I

the obesity rates and with my research I

the obesity rates and with my research I want to offer parents two tools to solve

want to offer parents two tools to solve

want to offer parents two tools to solve this problem in the best way possible so

this problem in the best way possible so

this problem in the best way possible so what do we as adults do when we want to

what do we as adults do when we want to

what do we as adults do when we want to lose weight or prevent weight gain

lose weight or prevent weight gain

lose weight or prevent weight gain exactly we cut foods out of our diet

exactly we cut foods out of our diet

exactly we cut foods out of our diet no more sugars no more snacks no more

no more sugars no more snacks no more

no more sugars no more snacks no more fast food no more soft drinks and that

fast food no more soft drinks and that

fast food no more soft drinks and that is what parents will do to their

is what parents will do to their

is what parents will do to their children too but just google it and many

children too but just google it and many

children too but just google it and many many websites will tell you that strict

many websites will tell you that strict

many websites will tell you that strict control and the banning of foods is

control and the banning of foods is

control and the banning of foods is dangerous so buying no cookies anymore

dangerous so buying no cookies anymore

dangerous so buying no cookies anymore and putting chocolate on the top shelf

and putting chocolate on the top shelf

and putting chocolate on the top shelf will backfire parents are warned because

will backfire parents are warned because

will backfire parents are warned because the banning of this food will lead to a

the banning of this food will lead to a

the banning of this food will lead to a desire which will result in overeating

desire which will result in overeating

desire which will result in overeating when these foods are freely available

when these foods are freely available

when these foods are freely available and that eventually leads to weight gain

and that eventually leads to weight gain

and that eventually leads to weight gain and over weight so wait a minute parents

and over weight so wait a minute parents

and over weight so wait a minute parents are warned that the banning of foods

are warned that the banning of foods

are warned that the banning of foods will result in obesity which is actually

will result in obesity which is actually

will result in obesity which is actually the one thing that they’re trying to

the one thing that they’re trying to

the one thing that they’re trying to prevent this doesn’t make sense it

prevent this doesn’t make sense it

prevent this doesn’t make sense it contradicts logic it contradicts

contradicts logic it contradicts

contradicts logic it contradicts intuition and unintentionally it leads

intuition and unintentionally it leads

intuition and unintentionally it leads to feelings of guilt among parents so

to feelings of guilt among parents so

to feelings of guilt among parents so these guidelines are based on some

these guidelines are based on some

these guidelines are based on some experimental studies and these are

experimental studies and these are

experimental studies and these are really great studies very well-designed

really great studies very well-designed

really great studies very well-designed experiments but that is also the problem

experiments but that is also the problem

experiments but that is also the problem with these studies because findings have

with these studies because findings have

with these studies because findings have not been replicated outside the lab in

not been replicated outside the lab in

not been replicated outside the lab in real life and work from my own research

real life and work from my own research

real life and work from my own research group has actually led to different

group has actually led to different

group has actually led to different conclusions so using a different design

conclusions so using a different design

conclusions so using a different design and observational design in which we

and observational design in which we

and observational design in which we follow families over time we found that

follow families over time we found that

follow families over time we found that parents aren’t actually causing the

parents aren’t actually causing the

parents aren’t actually causing the overeating know they’re doing their best

overeating know they’re doing their best

overeating know they’re doing their best to prevent it to control it because they

to prevent it to control it because they

to prevent it to control it because they worry about

worry about

worry about their child’s weight so parents relax

their child’s weight so parents relax

their child’s weight so parents relax and don’t worry

and don’t worry

and don’t worry it does not seem so much harm in putting

it does not seem so much harm in putting

it does not seem so much harm in putting the chocolate on the top top shelf okay

the chocolate on the top top shelf okay

the chocolate on the top top shelf okay now let’s move on to that other problem

now let’s move on to that other problem

now let’s move on to that other problem at the kitchen table children who are

at the kitchen table children who are

at the kitchen table children who are difficult picky eaters you know does

difficult picky eaters you know does

difficult picky eaters you know does children who don’t want to eat their

children who don’t want to eat their

children who don’t want to eat their broccoli or beans or fish or who all of

broccoli or beans or fish or who all of

broccoli or beans or fish or who all of a sudden claim I hate milk yes you

a sudden claim I hate milk yes you

a sudden claim I hate milk yes you probably know or one or two of those

probably know or one or two of those

probably know or one or two of those children or you were one like this

children or you were one like this

children or you were one like this yourself and that’s not so strange that

yourself and that’s not so strange that

yourself and that’s not so strange that you notice behavior because it’s really

you notice behavior because it’s really

you notice behavior because it’s really common about 50% goes through a phase of

common about 50% goes through a phase of

common about 50% goes through a phase of picky eating at some point and in most

picky eating at some point and in most

picky eating at some point and in most children the vegetable hatred disappears

children the vegetable hatred disappears

children the vegetable hatred disappears over time although in some it may last a

over time although in some it may last a

over time although in some it may last a bit longer in most children this

bit longer in most children this

bit longer in most children this difficult behavior is not really a

difficult behavior is not really a

difficult behavior is not really a health problem per se but it does drive

health problem per se but it does drive

health problem per se but it does drive parents nuts because parents don’t want

parents nuts because parents don’t want

parents nuts because parents don’t want their child to be hungry or

their child to be hungry or

their child to be hungry or undernourished so they try to persuade

undernourished so they try to persuade

undernourished so they try to persuade their child to eat a little bit more

their child to eat a little bit more

their child to eat a little bit more come on one more bite please or okay so

come on one more bite please or okay so

come on one more bite please or okay so this is your plate well then at least

this is your plate well then at least

this is your plate well then at least finish this part of it again this is

finish this part of it again this is

finish this part of it again this is very logical parenting behavior but the

very logical parenting behavior but the

very logical parenting behavior but the handbooks advise against it pressuring a

handbooks advise against it pressuring a

handbooks advise against it pressuring a child to much will have negative

child to much will have negative

child to much will have negative consequences that’s what the handbooks

consequences that’s what the handbooks

consequences that’s what the handbooks saying because children will start to

saying because children will start to

saying because children will start to hate the forced foods and eventually eat

hate the forced foods and eventually eat

hate the forced foods and eventually eat less again this idea is based on

less again this idea is based on

less again this idea is based on experimental studies conducted in the

experimental studies conducted in the

experimental studies conducted in the lab but observational work from others

lab but observational work from others

lab but observational work from others and also from my own group has led to

and also from my own group has led to

and also from my own group has led to different conclusions at pushing a child

different conclusions at pushing a child

different conclusions at pushing a child to eat something is not really causing

to eat something is not really causing

to eat something is not really causing picky eating it’s much more the other

picky eating it’s much more the other

picky eating it’s much more the other way around it’s parents who try to help

way around it’s parents who try to help

way around it’s parents who try to help their child and solve the problem so my

their child and solve the problem so my

their child and solve the problem so my advice is parents don’t worry if you try

advice is parents don’t worry if you try

advice is parents don’t worry if you try to persuade your child

to persuade your child

to persuade your child eat the broccoli when he is he or she is

eat the broccoli when he is he or she is

eat the broccoli when he is he or she is being a picky eater parents don’t worry

being a picky eater parents don’t worry

being a picky eater parents don’t worry or don’t feel guilty when you try to

or don’t feel guilty when you try to

or don’t feel guilty when you try to limit the food intake of your child when

limit the food intake of your child when

limit the food intake of your child when he or she is becoming a bit heavy it

he or she is becoming a bit heavy it

he or she is becoming a bit heavy it seems that this intuitive parenting

seems that this intuitive parenting

seems that this intuitive parenting behavior is actually not so bad after

behavior is actually not so bad after

behavior is actually not so bad after all it is much more people like me who

all it is much more people like me who

all it is much more people like me who need to do more because we cannot just

need to do more because we cannot just

need to do more because we cannot just based guidelines on one type of study so

based guidelines on one type of study so

based guidelines on one type of study so we need to do more and we need to look

we need to do more and we need to look

we need to do more and we need to look at the problem from different angles so

at the problem from different angles so

at the problem from different angles so we should do more research and yes we

we should do more research and yes we

we should do more research and yes we should do experimental studies but also

should do experimental studies but also

should do experimental studies but also observational studies in real life and

observational studies in real life and

observational studies in real life and interviews and we should do intervention

interviews and we should do intervention

interviews and we should do intervention studies to test if what we put in these

studies to test if what we put in these

studies to test if what we put in these handbooks is really helping thank you

handbooks is really helping thank you

handbooks is really helping thank you [Applause]

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