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happened to him when they were guys that someone
I knew a family member died
the family member of a friend someone in the
neighborhood someone from school is likely
that many who are here now
we have in our memory some
death that we had to go through
in the childhood
maybe if we remember we can
remember the way in how we
accompanied at that time something could
have been better than that accompaniment
today we could do something different like
adults to accompany that child or
that girl that we went
today I want to talk about two things I want
talk about children and death children and
death
said so it seems like two words that
nor should they be touched as if they were two
separate worlds
maybe it happened to them and if not it would not be
nothing strange that happens to them that a
child that can be your son and your nephew
your grandchild if you are teachers can be your
student and tell him I ‘ll make you a
question my mom is sick and not
skinny dead doctors told us
that is serious
my mom is going to die
they started thinking because in general
grown ups
we talked little about death with
the boys children and death
what would you say death is a
theme of childhood
I would love to hear
your answers
I’m going to take the daring of
answer shop definitely death
it’s a childhood theme because between
other things children are curious
they saw and death is a mystery
the kids to death see her every day
in nature they listen to him in
stories that we tell to the night and
Sometimes they have to live when they lose
to a loved one to a close being and this
it happens way beyond us
as adults the subject of death we
like it or not we like it or do not generate rejection
the kids to death play for
example with a wooden sword
We played that I killed you, they think, Mom
a question for the kitten to
died lives and sometimes insistently not
they look for a question mom is going to die
but of course sometimes when they want
even sometimes when they need to talk
of this subject they encounter a great
obstacle adults
how will I talk about death what
I’m going to take my little one over
your grandfather died I ‘ll take the subject
in a young child does not yet understand the
pediatrician I come from the world of care
palliatives for those who are not
familiar I tell you that in
palliative care our task
is to accompany and try
alleviate the suffering of people from
any age they go through
severe and advanced chronic disease
we say a threat disease
for life
we accompany these people and their
families
job as they said in the team
palliative care of the zonal hospital
de bariloche also worked in an NGO
where our purpose is to make
the palliative care is a little
best known
we know that the care
palliatives are a right but it is
difficult to claim rights and does not know
one of the projects that we are
leading forward a few years ago
it’s called duel in schools
the goal that we set ourselves was
bring the theme of mourning the issue of
death educational areas because
we trust that the school is a place
where these issues can be reflected
you can learn and you can teach
this project allows us a lot of
things besides knowing a lot of
schools we met a lot of of
students and teachers
we met a lot of people know
many points of view in relation to the
death one thing that we hear with
often they tell us
particularly teachers and sometimes
teachers with many years of experience
collided with the subject of death
I do not know what to do in those
educators and those of us who come from the countryside
of health a little we seem not to
they talked a lot about this topic there is a
situation that we see in the
schools that our team work
we put a fantasy name
we call it the paradox of the party
a great name seems like a very
simple
imagine a wall here on this side
of the wall is fourth grade
the teacher or the teacher and fourth grade
we do not know well why but he likes
the subject of death then causes it
with his students he brings a story
movie brings out the topic this side of the
wall is fifth grade the teacher or the
fifth teacher
we do not know well because maybe because
had a traumatic experience when
I was young
maybe because it seems to him that death does not
you have to talk at school it does not matter
because in the fifth grade, there is no talk
of death
what it depends on asked them what the
kids from this school can talk the
The subject of death depends on what they record
to put it easier
depends on chance we should not leave a
such an important issue delivered at random
this topic can be learned can be
teaching schools can be a
place they once taught a
boy or girl riding a bike but
without casters I guess so
how was the experience they got on
the bicycle pedaling
not because he signals a boy to walk in
bicycle without wheels is a
different experience is to let
pedaling to go back at most to the side
and keep them from hitting each other good to talk about
death with boys sometimes gets
It seems like that I’m going to tell you one
little story two years ago
approximately
we accompany a woman of about 60
years of the hospital
we accompanied a lot of months the
last stage in his house he had a
serious illness had a very cancer
advanced
one day he calls us one of his daughters and we
says that his mom had died
we went to the house we arrived a lot
of people
neighbor relatives, we greet
especially the children with whom
we had been working for many months and
we asked them if we could do something
for them and one of their daughters told us
yes he asked us if we could
talk to your little daughter of four
years
expensive we went looking for it we walked by the
beautiful garden of that house we sit down
under a tree four years and
we asked how he was and how these
he did not tell us anything
we asked him what all these people do
gathered is there and he started talking
He told us that his grandmother had died
and he asked us if we knew it was the
death do not leave us or answer and we
He explained that death is going on a trip
jumping cloud cloud and as above
of the clouds are the stars of
star star until you find the
cutest star saw how the
poetic that a boy of 24 can have
years did not interest this babe much
his poetics because he kept talking and
he told us that the last time his
Grandmother was very sad and that she had
died of sadness like who says in
that instant
we stopped the ear keep talking followed
talking and he told us that
your mom is very sad we are
speaking or is it reflected if my grandmother
My mom had died of sadness
that he was sad he was going to die of
sadness
that was the first moment in which as
who says we open our mouths not
he emphatically does not take he is not going to die
of sadness your mom is sad
that sadness of a little bit goes away
aggravating is going to continue
transforming into something else that was
talk about death with this babe was
prevent that hit and hitting sometimes
is to join things that do not have to be
united as talk of death with the
guys as much as possible without fear and if
they are afraid crossing fear
they saw that the boys tell them they have
to be brave
well I want to be brave is not to have
afraid to be brave know what to do
with that fear and also if they can
if we can think from time to time in
death is a bit more difficult
still face these chats sometimes
if we do not even know what we think
us the adults of the subject if the
last time we think about death
It was many years ago
when was the last time they thought
in death
there is no formula to talk to the
children of death but if there are any
way sometimes you have to put the guys
to talk is harder still
face these conversations and we do not know
not even what they think the subject
the other day in the hospital he had a
conversation with a man of 40 years
his house and I’m 40 with a boy of 40
years that he told me that his father had
one a disease had a cancer
advanced and I asked him about his son
that he had seven medium are being able
talk to him they told him what he has
grandfather clear of course from the
principle that you have cancer that is serious
and in these last weeks I spoke with
he who can die said I
he kept talking and in a moment in
silence they saw when we are talking
and an idea that paralyzes us comes to us
and he says up but the one who always talks
I’m south never heard what he
have to say I like who says he
went down line let’s talk to the
guys of death are not going to take and
what he says give them a great
poetic image that also happens
sometimes they are heard or that by talking about the
non- renewable death is not going to be thing
what
in these years I learned many things
because I had the opportunity to talk to a
bunch of guys on the subject of death
sometimes the guys were the same as
they were sick they were sometimes brothers
of children of grandchildren from and I learned some
things I learned that to talk about the
death is not always necessary to use
words you can also use stories
songs symbols drawings sometimes
can use silences we are adults
those who believe that when we say to
speak whenever you use the words
I also learned that everyone has their
style that there is not a single style
you have your style but I learned
something that I can not get out of the
head to talk about the subject of death
and other important issues with the
guys do not forget about two
features two features two
qualities you have to be clear and you have to
be honest you can ask a question
if my mom is going to die sometimes
depends the moment depends the child that
is ahead depends the situation the
answer has to be if I do not say that
be an easy answer but more is going
to die
We do not know when she is very sick
we will do everything possible so that
do not suffer sometimes the answer can be
return the question I want the
guys sometimes when he has to talk
of something important
it says it in the form of a question what are you
thinking why did it occur to you to ask
that looks for you imagine maybe you are
other answers are happening
better at this time but the true
is that more often than we
would like
the answers we hear are other
it occurs to you to ask, did not just do not
it’s fine we ‘re going to be fine think
better in that
those answers are not clear and
sincere they know what it is to be sincere
be honest not lie side
not with all this children and the
death I’m saying that when
let’s finish these talks let’s get out of
this room
let’s look for the children of our
family
well we feel in round
let’s take the floor and let’s say children today
let’s talk about something very important
no no no no that would be a great
exaggeration I’m just saying that
let’s have a little more present the
theme
finally beyond that beyond
that each one of you
think something creates something or feels something in
relationship to this topic is a
responsibility that we adults have
be there ready and available for
when a boy wants or needs to talk
of this subject the subject of death is not
a subject that we have to leave freed
randomly how the guys
they face a loss they are modeling
he is transformed into adults
they are going to do we are what we are
partly because of how we face
losses
it may be that for some the issue of
death be a little easier for
some a little harder but already what
that we should not forget will leave out
of the conversation
the theme of death is to leave out a
piece of life will leave out a theme of
Vital importance
Thank you
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