I was 16 when I started to wonder when I was going to stop being attracted to
was going to stop being attracted to
was going to stop being attracted to boys
boys
boys what would I look like how would it feel
what would I look like how would it feel
what would I look like how would it feel what I liked being a lesbian with the
what I liked being a lesbian with the
what I liked being a lesbian with the lesbian fairy visit me one night and I
lesbian fairy visit me one night and I
lesbian fairy visit me one night and I wake up with short hair a closet full of
wake up with short hair a closet full of
wake up with short hair a closet full of flannels and a fridge full of hummus see
flannels and a fridge full of hummus see
flannels and a fridge full of hummus see I knew I was attracted to boys but I
I knew I was attracted to boys but I
I knew I was attracted to boys but I realized I was starting to become
realized I was starting to become
realized I was starting to become attracted to girls and I didn’t know you
attracted to girls and I didn’t know you
attracted to girls and I didn’t know you could be attracted to both so I figured
could be attracted to both so I figured
could be attracted to both so I figured I’m becoming a lesbian in all my 16
I’m becoming a lesbian in all my 16
I’m becoming a lesbian in all my 16 years I have never I had never heard
years I have never I had never heard
years I have never I had never heard seen or known of the word bisexual I was
seen or known of the word bisexual I was
seen or known of the word bisexual I was taught that if you were gay you were
taught that if you were gay you were
taught that if you were gay you were probably going to get AIDS and Di’s
probably going to get AIDS and Di’s
probably going to get AIDS and Di’s sti’s were only for sex addicts condoms
sti’s were only for sex addicts condoms
sti’s were only for sex addicts condoms were only for men and sex sex was
were only for men and sex sex was
were only for men and sex sex was downright terrifying and full of danger
downright terrifying and full of danger
downright terrifying and full of danger 10 years later I got a job at Planned
10 years later I got a job at Planned
10 years later I got a job at Planned Parenthood educating youth on the one
Parenthood educating youth on the one
Parenthood educating youth on the one thing they fail to tell us anything
thing they fail to tell us anything
thing they fail to tell us anything about sex I told the youth that came
about sex I told the youth that came
about sex I told the youth that came into my Center – bisexuality is
into my Center – bisexuality is
into my Center – bisexuality is certainly real that most SDI’s are
certainly real that most SDI’s are
certainly real that most SDI’s are curable and are just as common as a
curable and are just as common as a
curable and are just as common as a throat infection or the flu sex should
throat infection or the flu sex should
throat infection or the flu sex should never be made to seem scary
never be made to seem scary
never be made to seem scary it should be fun safe and consensual and
it should be fun safe and consensual and
it should be fun safe and consensual and condoms well it turns out those condoms
condoms well it turns out those condoms
condoms well it turns out those condoms for people with penises and people with
for people with penises and people with
for people with penises and people with vaginas let’s face it our sexual health
vaginas let’s face it our sexual health
vaginas let’s face it our sexual health education has never been that good we
education has never been that good we
education has never been that good we sit in a classroom we watch a PowerPoint
sit in a classroom we watch a PowerPoint
sit in a classroom we watch a PowerPoint we might label a diagram or two of the
we might label a diagram or two of the
we might label a diagram or two of the male and the female genitals we leave
male and the female genitals we leave
male and the female genitals we leave the three hour or three day or three
the three hour or three day or three
the three hour or three day or three week unit and we get on with our lives
week unit and we get on with our lives
week unit and we get on with our lives when you play any reshape our identities
when you play any reshape our identities
when you play any reshape our identities we challenge the traditional
we challenge the traditional
we challenge the traditional understanding of what a relationship is
understanding of what a relationship is
understanding of what a relationship is we might even change our gender or
we might even change our gender or
we might even change our gender or sexuality or both we resilient ly grow
sexuality or both we resilient ly grow
sexuality or both we resilient ly grow up into society
up into society
up into society that not only fails to educate us about
that not only fails to educate us about
that not only fails to educate us about sex but also shames us for having sex
sex but also shames us for having sex
sex but also shames us for having sex all the while sexualizing the human body
all the while sexualizing the human body
all the while sexualizing the human body and what seems like every advertisement
and what seems like every advertisement
and what seems like every advertisement magazine and celebrity talk show we make
magazine and celebrity talk show we make
magazine and celebrity talk show we make jokes about X s T is not realizing that
jokes about X s T is not realizing that
jokes about X s T is not realizing that we’re probably gonna have one or more in
we’re probably gonna have one or more in
we’re probably gonna have one or more in our lifetime as a matter of fact most of
our lifetime as a matter of fact most of
our lifetime as a matter of fact most of us here are carrying the herpes virus
us here are carrying the herpes virus
us here are carrying the herpes virus right now
right now
right now but even if we knew that we had the
but even if we knew that we had the
but even if we knew that we had the virus or herpes as we call it we
virus or herpes as we call it we
virus or herpes as we call it we probably wouldn’t tell anyone maybe our
probably wouldn’t tell anyone maybe our
probably wouldn’t tell anyone maybe our best friend but certainly an author
best friend but certainly an author
best friend but certainly an author teacher or parents we have no problem of
teacher or parents we have no problem of
teacher or parents we have no problem of telling our teachers that we can’t
telling our teachers that we can’t
telling our teachers that we can’t attend class because of a throat
attend class because of a throat
attend class because of a throat infection but we’d be terrified to tell
infection but we’d be terrified to tell
infection but we’d be terrified to tell them it was because of sexually
them it was because of sexually
them it was because of sexually transmitted infection wouldn’t we so we
transmitted infection wouldn’t we so we
transmitted infection wouldn’t we so we stay quiet when I didn’t know the
stay quiet when I didn’t know the
stay quiet when I didn’t know the answers to any of my questions about
answers to any of my questions about
answers to any of my questions about sexual health I did what any
sexual health I did what any
sexual health I did what any self-respecting millennial would do and
self-respecting millennial would do and
self-respecting millennial would do and I googled it and the disease genitals
I googled it and the disease genitals
I googled it and the disease genitals that I saw were enough to never even
that I saw were enough to never even
that I saw were enough to never even want to make you whisper the word sex
want to make you whisper the word sex
want to make you whisper the word sex again so if we’re using Google for
again so if we’re using Google for
again so if we’re using Google for sexual health education and we’re using
sexual health education and we’re using
sexual health education and we’re using Google to become the experts on our own
Google to become the experts on our own
Google to become the experts on our own bodies how do we become the experts on
bodies how do we become the experts on
bodies how do we become the experts on their own bodies with no education one
their own bodies with no education one
their own bodies with no education one word communication communication with
word communication communication with
word communication communication with ourselves or partners friends parents
ourselves or partners friends parents
ourselves or partners friends parents teachers and doctors when I mean
teachers and doctors when I mean
teachers and doctors when I mean communication with ourselves I don’t
communication with ourselves I don’t
communication with ourselves I don’t mean talking to yourself I mean
mean talking to yourself I mean
mean talking to yourself I mean masturbation I know oh I said it I said
masturbation I know oh I said it I said
masturbation I know oh I said it I said the one thing that most all of us do but
the one thing that most all of us do but
the one thing that most all of us do but none of us talk about masturbation is
none of us talk about masturbation is
none of us talk about masturbation is the best way to get to know what makes
the best way to get to know what makes
the best way to get to know what makes you orgasm and what doesn’t make you
you orgasm and what doesn’t make you
you orgasm and what doesn’t make you orgasm
orgasm
orgasm [Laughter]
masturbation is the best way to find out
masturbation is the best way to find out what makes you orgasm and what doesn’t
what makes you orgasm and what doesn’t
what makes you orgasm and what doesn’t make you orgasm
make you orgasm
make you orgasm that way we can tell our partner what we
that way we can tell our partner what we
that way we can tell our partner what we like our partners want to know how you
like our partners want to know how you
like our partners want to know how you feel
feel
feel as well our partners whether they be
as well our partners whether they be
as well our partners whether they be one-night stands friends with benefits
one-night stands friends with benefits
one-night stands friends with benefits or long-term lovers want to make you
or long-term lovers want to make you
or long-term lovers want to make you feel good
speaking of orgasms do you guys know how
speaking of orgasms do you guys know how many people fake an orgasm as many as 1
many people fake an orgasm as many as 1
many people fake an orgasm as many as 1 in 2 people have admitted to faking an
in 2 people have admitted to faking an
in 2 people have admitted to faking an orgasm and as many as 1 in 4 people
orgasm and as many as 1 in 4 people
orgasm and as many as 1 in 4 people admit to faking orgasms regularly
admit to faking orgasms regularly
admit to faking orgasms regularly society doesn’t really make us feel like
society doesn’t really make us feel like
society doesn’t really make us feel like we don’t need to fake an orgasm though
we don’t need to fake an orgasm though
we don’t need to fake an orgasm though we’re told growing up that sex is about
we’re told growing up that sex is about
we’re told growing up that sex is about making babies but for most of us if we
making babies but for most of us if we
making babies but for most of us if we choose to have sex sex is about pleasure
choose to have sex sex is about pleasure
choose to have sex sex is about pleasure movies show these mind-blowing orgasms
movies show these mind-blowing orgasms
movies show these mind-blowing orgasms that make us feel like or that show two
that make us feel like or that show two
that make us feel like or that show two partners orgasming at the exact same
partners orgasming at the exact same
partners orgasming at the exact same time showing this bed shaking pelvis
time showing this bed shaking pelvis
time showing this bed shaking pelvis pulsating theatrical ending in reality
pulsating theatrical ending in reality
pulsating theatrical ending in reality both partners rarely orgasm at the same
both partners rarely orgasm at the same
both partners rarely orgasm at the same time and sex can be messy can be fun and
time and sex can be messy can be fun and
time and sex can be messy can be fun and it can be awkward but these expectations
it can be awkward but these expectations
it can be awkward but these expectations from society lead us to feel like we
from society lead us to feel like we
from society lead us to feel like we always need to have this toe curling
always need to have this toe curling
always need to have this toe curling back arching screaming at the top of
back arching screaming at the top of
back arching screaming at the top of your lungs orgasm so we fake them but
your lungs orgasm so we fake them but
your lungs orgasm so we fake them but faking it doesn’t only lead us to not
faking it doesn’t only lead us to not
faking it doesn’t only lead us to not feel good it also wasn’t properly
feel good it also wasn’t properly
feel good it also wasn’t properly conveyed or a partner what we need
conveyed or a partner what we need
conveyed or a partner what we need when it also doesn’t properly conveyed
when it also doesn’t properly conveyed
when it also doesn’t properly conveyed or a partner what we like when we’re
or a partner what we like when we’re
or a partner what we like when we’re pretending to like something that we’re
pretending to like something that we’re
pretending to like something that we’re not we need to communicate with
not we need to communicate with
not we need to communicate with ourselves to find out what feels good so
ourselves to find out what feels good so
ourselves to find out what feels good so we can let our partners know it might be
we can let our partners know it might be
we can let our partners know it might be awkward at first telling your partner
awkward at first telling your partner
awkward at first telling your partner that you don’t like something that
that you don’t like something that
that you don’t like something that they’re doing but you deserve amazing
they’re doing but you deserve amazing
they’re doing but you deserve amazing sex
sex
sex and those mind-blowing orgasms do exist
and those mind-blowing orgasms do exist
and those mind-blowing orgasms do exist they just have to start with
they just have to start with
they just have to start with communication our partners also want to
communication our partners also want to
communication our partners also want to know how we feel there’s nothing sexier
know how we feel there’s nothing sexier
know how we feel there’s nothing sexier than watching somebody feel good and
than watching somebody feel good and
than watching somebody feel good and knowing that you’re the one that’s doing
knowing that you’re the one that’s doing
knowing that you’re the one that’s doing it you also want a fully consent to
it you also want a fully consent to
it you also want a fully consent to being in the bed or the car or wherever
being in the bed or the car or wherever
being in the bed or the car or wherever you’re getting freaky with them
you’re getting freaky with them
you’re getting freaky with them communication though isn’t just with
communication though isn’t just with
communication though isn’t just with yourself and your partner sometimes
yourself and your partner sometimes
yourself and your partner sometimes communication can be most difficult with
communication can be most difficult with
communication can be most difficult with the generation before us the generation
the generation before us the generation
the generation before us the generation in which trusted adults such as our
in which trusted adults such as our
in which trusted adults such as our parents teachers and doctors grew up in
parents teachers and doctors grew up in
parents teachers and doctors grew up in even though we are younger we’re taking
even though we are younger we’re taking
even though we are younger we’re taking the lead on our sexual health education
the lead on our sexual health education
the lead on our sexual health education and blazing the trail and we largely
and blazing the trail and we largely
and blazing the trail and we largely determine the service we get the way
determine the service we get the way
determine the service we get the way we’re taught in the education we receive
we’re taught in the education we receive
we’re taught in the education we receive based on the communication that we give
based on the communication that we give
based on the communication that we give we need to remember that these trusted
we need to remember that these trusted
we need to remember that these trusted adults probably got even less sexual
adults probably got even less sexual
adults probably got even less sexual education than we did so we need to be
education than we did so we need to be
education than we did so we need to be patient but persistent and our sexual
patient but persistent and our sexual
patient but persistent and our sexual health talks with them as Millennials we
health talks with them as Millennials we
health talks with them as Millennials we are changing the conversation and
are changing the conversation and
are changing the conversation and changing people’s perception on gender
changing people’s perception on gender
changing people’s perception on gender and sexuality we are louder more open
and sexuality we are louder more open
and sexuality we are louder more open and more confident than any other
and more confident than any other
and more confident than any other generation before us we’re expected to
generation before us we’re expected to
generation before us we’re expected to live the lives of our parents generation
live the lives of our parents generation
live the lives of our parents generation even though the economy’s and flux and
even though the economy’s and flux and
even though the economy’s and flux and opportunities are constantly changing
opportunities are constantly changing
opportunities are constantly changing were unsettled you could say we’re
were unsettled you could say we’re
were unsettled you could say we’re already paving a new path for herself
already paving a new path for herself
already paving a new path for herself it’s time that we ensure that we stick
it’s time that we ensure that we stick
it’s time that we ensure that we stick together in fight for the rights of each
together in fight for the rights of each
together in fight for the rights of each other as well language is another way
other as well language is another way
other as well language is another way that we can become experts on our own
that we can become experts on our own
that we can become experts on our own bodies and respect the rights of others
bodies and respect the rights of others
bodies and respect the rights of others as well
as well
as well communication is more than just what our
communication is more than just what our
communication is more than just what our needs and desires are it also has to
needs and desires are it also has to
needs and desires are it also has to include respecting the needs and desires
include respecting the needs and desires
include respecting the needs and desires of others and
of others and
of others and loading their identities in our
loading their identities in our
loading their identities in our conversations we need to make sure that
conversations we need to make sure that
conversations we need to make sure that all identities are accepted in respected
all identities are accepted in respected
all identities are accepted in respected in society but we need to push to make
in society but we need to push to make
in society but we need to push to make that change we grew up learning that
that change we grew up learning that
that change we grew up learning that it’s not what’s on the inside or it’s
it’s not what’s on the inside or it’s
it’s not what’s on the inside or it’s all the time the outside that counts
all the time the outside that counts
all the time the outside that counts it’s what’s on the inside so we need to
it’s what’s on the inside so we need to
it’s what’s on the inside so we need to put that into action gender-neutral
put that into action gender-neutral
put that into action gender-neutral pronouns
pronouns
pronouns different genders sexualities and
different genders sexualities and
different genders sexualities and identities respecting those in societies
identities respecting those in societies
identities respecting those in societies should be common but they’re not so as
should be common but they’re not so as
should be common but they’re not so as Millennials I think it’s time that we
Millennials I think it’s time that we
Millennials I think it’s time that we stop giving a shit about what society is
stop giving a shit about what society is
stop giving a shit about what society is telling us to do think act or feel so
telling us to do think act or feel so
telling us to do think act or feel so there’s this theory called the slight
there’s this theory called the slight
there’s this theory called the slight edge by a dude by the name of Jeff Olson
edge by a dude by the name of Jeff Olson
edge by a dude by the name of Jeff Olson who explained success as productive
who explained success as productive
who explained success as productive actions that happen consistently over
actions that happen consistently over
actions that happen consistently over time changing your language to respect
time changing your language to respect
time changing your language to respect someone’s identity once in a
someone’s identity once in a
someone’s identity once in a conversation with a friend might not
conversation with a friend might not
conversation with a friend might not make a huge difference in society but
make a huge difference in society but
make a huge difference in society but vowing to change your language and doing
vowing to change your language and doing
vowing to change your language and doing so in every single conversation you have
so in every single conversation you have
so in every single conversation you have will make a change expressing your needs
will make a change expressing your needs
will make a change expressing your needs and desires not only in your
and desires not only in your
and desires not only in your relationship but also sexually with your
relationship but also sexually with your
relationship but also sexually with your partner I might be awkward at first but
partner I might be awkward at first but
partner I might be awkward at first but over time it will be normal and expected
over time it will be normal and expected
over time it will be normal and expected staying consistent with your
staying consistent with your
staying consistent with your communication but not only yourself and
communication but not only yourself and
communication but not only yourself and your partner but also your trusted
your partner but also your trusted
your partner but also your trusted adults won’t only change the way that
adults won’t only change the way that
adults won’t only change the way that you perceive sexual health but the way
you perceive sexual health but the way
you perceive sexual health but the way society does as well so sexual health
society does as well so sexual health
society does as well so sexual health education in the past 10 years hasn’t
education in the past 10 years hasn’t
education in the past 10 years hasn’t changed a whole lot but I bet you our
changed a whole lot but I bet you our
changed a whole lot but I bet you our sex lives sure have we deserve to have a
sex lives sure have we deserve to have a
sex lives sure have we deserve to have a society that accepts all genders and
society that accepts all genders and
society that accepts all genders and sexualities but as Millennials we need
sexualities but as Millennials we need
sexualities but as Millennials we need to make sure that that happens
to make sure that that happens
to make sure that that happens sexual health whether it be masturbation
sexual health whether it be masturbation
sexual health whether it be masturbation gender-neutral pronouns communication
gender-neutral pronouns communication
gender-neutral pronouns communication with multiple partners or just what your
with multiple partners or just what your
with multiple partners or just what your needs and desires are should be
needs and desires are should be
needs and desires are should be respected and expected respecting
respected and expected respecting
respected and expected respecting communication is going to change the
communication is going to change the
communication is going to change the world not some crappy sex talk as
world not some crappy sex talk as
world not some crappy sex talk as Millennials let’s get out that out there
Millennials let’s get out that out there
Millennials let’s get out that out there and make that change
and make that change
and make that change so ten years from now there’s no whore
so ten years from now there’s no whore
so ten years from now there’s no whore girl standing in front of her fridge
girl standing in front of her fridge
girl standing in front of her fridge waiting for hummus to appear I love
waiting for hummus to appear I love
waiting for hummus to appear I love hummus but I love boys too thank you
hummus but I love boys too thank you
hummus but I love boys too thank you [Applause]
[Applause]
[Applause] [Music]
[Music]
[Music] [Applause]
[Applause]
[Applause] you
you
you [Applause]
”
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