the film star arrived for his interview garland ‘red not only with awards but
garland ‘red not only with awards but
garland ‘red not only with awards but with tributes to his sex appeal
with tributes to his sex appeal
with tributes to his sex appeal he was also numerous magazine profiles
he was also numerous magazine profiles
he was also numerous magazine profiles told me the thinking woman’s crumpet now
told me the thinking woman’s crumpet now
told me the thinking woman’s crumpet now I’m a thinking woman but frankly I just
I’m a thinking woman but frankly I just
I’m a thinking woman but frankly I just couldn’t see it as a journalist I’d
couldn’t see it as a journalist I’d
couldn’t see it as a journalist I’d interviewed many people who interested
interviewed many people who interested
interviewed many people who interested me more we were to get acquainted for
me more we were to get acquainted for
me more we were to get acquainted for yet another magazine profile over dinner
yet another magazine profile over dinner
yet another magazine profile over dinner ahead of this assignment friends of
ahead of this assignment friends of
ahead of this assignment friends of every gender and sexual orientation
every gender and sexual orientation
every gender and sexual orientation bombarded me with excited emails they
bombarded me with excited emails they
bombarded me with excited emails they proposed carrying my digital recorder
proposed carrying my digital recorder
proposed carrying my digital recorder they proposed operating it they proposed
they proposed operating it they proposed
they proposed operating it they proposed posing as wine waiters they just wanted
posing as wine waiters they just wanted
posing as wine waiters they just wanted to be in the same room and breathe the
to be in the same room and breathe the
to be in the same room and breathe the same air as the film stir as I say I
same air as the film stir as I say I
same air as the film stir as I say I didn’t get it until quite suddenly I did
didn’t get it until quite suddenly I did
didn’t get it until quite suddenly I did must have been around the dessert course
must have been around the dessert course
must have been around the dessert course he was good company engaging at the risk
he was good company engaging at the risk
he was good company engaging at the risk of objectifying him hot now as a woman
of objectifying him hot now as a woman
of objectifying him hot now as a woman working in journalism I have spent years
working in journalism I have spent years
working in journalism I have spent years figuring out how to dodge lecherous men
figuring out how to dodge lecherous men
figuring out how to dodge lecherous men and had long ago trained myself to avoid
and had long ago trained myself to avoid
and had long ago trained myself to avoid any gesture that might be misinterpreted
any gesture that might be misinterpreted
any gesture that might be misinterpreted yet now here I was leaning forward
yet now here I was leaning forward
yet now here I was leaning forward gazing at him
gazing at him
gazing at him toying with a strand of my hair until oh
one of those hairs it was attached to
one of those hairs it was attached to the middle of my cheek
the middle of my cheek
the middle of my cheek so in the very moment that I discovered
so in the very moment that I discovered
so in the very moment that I discovered the full force of the film stars
the full force of the film stars
the full force of the film stars magnetism
magnetism
magnetism I also uncovered my new and unsuspected
I also uncovered my new and unsuspected
I also uncovered my new and unsuspected power like many women of a certain age
power like many women of a certain age
power like many women of a certain age I’m brilliant at growing extra-long body
I’m brilliant at growing extra-long body
I’m brilliant at growing extra-long body hair and that is not our only special
hair and that is not our only special
hair and that is not our only special skill
skill
skill we don’t need invisibility cloaks we
we don’t need invisibility cloaks we
we don’t need invisibility cloaks we become magically invisible we become
become magically invisible we become
become magically invisible we become hags now I’ll return to hags and our
hags now I’ll return to hags and our
hags now I’ll return to hags and our special powers in a minute but first
special powers in a minute but first
special powers in a minute but first it’s worth stating that women as a class
it’s worth stating that women as a class
it’s worth stating that women as a class are always overlooked in systems
are always overlooked in systems
are always overlooked in systems designed by and for men the work that we
designed by and for men the work that we
designed by and for men the work that we do especially for carrying work the
do especially for carrying work the
do especially for carrying work the unpaid work goes largely unrecognized
unpaid work goes largely unrecognized
unpaid work goes largely unrecognized the violence that disfigures our daily
the violence that disfigures our daily
the violence that disfigures our daily lives should provoke outrage sexual
lives should provoke outrage sexual
lives should provoke outrage sexual harassment assault to women killed every
harassment assault to women killed every
harassment assault to women killed every single week by a current or former
single week by a current or former
single week by a current or former partner yet where are the men out
partner yet where are the men out
partner yet where are the men out protesting this toll and if the present
protesting this toll and if the present
protesting this toll and if the present has a nasty habit of overlooking female
has a nasty habit of overlooking female
has a nasty habit of overlooking female oppression history his story has always
oppression history his story has always
oppression history his story has always minimized female achievement fewer than
minimized female achievement fewer than
minimized female achievement fewer than 3% of all statues in the UK depict a
3% of all statues in the UK depict a
3% of all statues in the UK depict a named woman who was not a queen and some
named woman who was not a queen and some
named woman who was not a queen and some women are far less visible than others
women are far less visible than others
women are far less visible than others there is literally only one statue in
there is literally only one statue in
there is literally only one statue in the whole of the UK celebrating in named
the whole of the UK celebrating in named
the whole of the UK celebrating in named black woman Mary Seacole the Jamaican
black woman Mary Seacole the Jamaican
black woman Mary Seacole the Jamaican born nurse and that was put up last year
that is not to say that women aren’t
that is not to say that women aren’t celebrated for our abilities oh we are
celebrated for our abilities oh we are
celebrated for our abilities oh we are for marriage ability tractability
for marriage ability tractability
for marriage ability tractability reproductive ability shag ability
reproductive ability shag ability
reproductive ability shag ability any woman with these abilities is going
any woman with these abilities is going
any woman with these abilities is going to quickly discover that society has
to quickly discover that society has
to quickly discover that society has some pretty strong views about exactly
some pretty strong views about exactly
some pretty strong views about exactly how visible she should be and to whom
how visible she should be and to whom
how visible she should be and to whom some countries punish women for showing
some countries punish women for showing
some countries punish women for showing a sliver of rest others police women for
a sliver of rest others police women for
a sliver of rest others police women for covering up there are many notions about
covering up there are many notions about
covering up there are many notions about female beauty and propriety but on a
female beauty and propriety but on a
female beauty and propriety but on a couple of points remarkable unanimity
couple of points remarkable unanimity
couple of points remarkable unanimity women everywhere are made to feel that
women everywhere are made to feel that
women everywhere are made to feel that we fail to measure up as for older women
we fail to measure up as for older women
we fail to measure up as for older women well men gain gravitas with age we as I
well men gain gravitas with age we as I
well men gain gravitas with age we as I said disappear we become hags hags are
hags are banished from TV and
hags are banished from TV and advertising less our ugliness offend
advertising less our ugliness offend
advertising less our ugliness offend hags are routinely patronized as generic
hags are routinely patronized as generic
hags are routinely patronized as generic old dears yet treated as anything but
old dears yet treated as anything but
old dears yet treated as anything but dear by pensions regimes that make no
dear by pensions regimes that make no
dear by pensions regimes that make no allowance for the gender pay gap the
allowance for the gender pay gap the
allowance for the gender pay gap the likelihood of maternity breaks or the
likelihood of maternity breaks or the
likelihood of maternity breaks or the fact that women on average live longer
fact that women on average live longer
fact that women on average live longer than men hags can stand at any bar
than men hags can stand at any bar
than men hags can stand at any bar waving furiously at the bartender and
waving furiously at the bartender and
waving furiously at the bartender and still not be served hags can be the best
still not be served hags can be the best
still not be served hags can be the best qualified person for any job and still
qualified person for any job and still
qualified person for any job and still get nowhere huge issues that impact all
get nowhere huge issues that impact all
get nowhere huge issues that impact all of us such as how to arrange social care
of us such as how to arrange social care
of us such as how to arrange social care or indeed how to fix gender inequality
or indeed how to fix gender inequality
or indeed how to fix gender inequality the biggest global injustice of them all
the biggest global injustice of them all
the biggest global injustice of them all are routinely ignored by men reductively
are routinely ignored by men reductively
are routinely ignored by men reductively labeled women’s issues as a result we
labeled women’s issues as a result we
labeled women’s issues as a result we all lose out men very much – that’s why
all lose out men very much – that’s why
all lose out men very much – that’s why in 2015 I co-founded the women’s
in 2015 I co-founded the women’s
in 2015 I co-founded the women’s equality Percy I believe passionately in
equality Percy I believe passionately in
equality Percy I believe passionately in gender equality as a matter of social
gender equality as a matter of social
gender equality as a matter of social justice and societal self-interest one
justice and societal self-interest one
justice and societal self-interest one study alone predicts a boost to global
study alone predicts a boost to global
study alone predicts a boost to global GDP of eight point three trillion pounds
GDP of eight point three trillion pounds
GDP of eight point three trillion pounds simply from Nair
simply from Nair
simply from Nair growing the gender gap and multiple
growing the gender gap and multiple
growing the gender gap and multiple studies point to higher rates of
studies point to higher rates of
studies point to higher rates of well-being and lower rates of depression
well-being and lower rates of depression
well-being and lower rates of depression in more gender equal countries for men
in more gender equal countries for men
in more gender equal countries for men that’s right we could all be happier
that’s right we could all be happier
that’s right we could all be happier healthier and wealthier all it takes is
healthier and wealthier all it takes is
healthier and wealthier all it takes is political will and yet instead of
political will and yet instead of
political will and yet instead of speeding towards that brighter future
speeding towards that brighter future
speeding towards that brighter future rights and protections women thought
rights and protections women thought
rights and protections women thought secure are under threat here and in many
secure are under threat here and in many
secure are under threat here and in many other countries don’t despair
other countries don’t despair
other countries don’t despair remember hags and our special powers now
remember hags and our special powers now
remember hags and our special powers now I haven’t yet worked out how to use that
I haven’t yet worked out how to use that
I haven’t yet worked out how to use that power for growing extra long hair but I
power for growing extra long hair but I
power for growing extra long hair but I will and if anybody’s got any
will and if anybody’s got any
will and if anybody’s got any suggestions you can find me on Twitter
suggestions you can find me on Twitter
suggestions you can find me on Twitter this much I know invisibility is also a
this much I know invisibility is also a
this much I know invisibility is also a superpower I’m going to tell you how to
superpower I’m going to tell you how to
superpower I’m going to tell you how to harness that superpower and I’m going to
harness that superpower and I’m going to
harness that superpower and I’m going to tell you why all women should aspire to
tell you why all women should aspire to
tell you why all women should aspire to be hags as for our male allies let’s
be hags as for our male allies let’s
be hags as for our male allies let’s call you hagiographies there’s a lot you
call you hagiographies there’s a lot you
call you hagiographies there’s a lot you can be doing too you can support us work
can be doing too you can support us work
can be doing too you can support us work with us above all go out in your own
with us above all go out in your own
with us above all go out in your own bloody right as activists for gender
bloody right as activists for gender
bloody right as activists for gender equality any woman at any age or stage
equality any woman at any age or stage
equality any woman at any age or stage can be a hag my grandmother was a
can be a hag my grandmother was a
can be a hag my grandmother was a classic old hag she was from Chicago and
classic old hag she was from Chicago and
classic old hag she was from Chicago and I remember going out to dinner with her
I remember going out to dinner with her
I remember going out to dinner with her when she was in her 90s and a young man
when she was in her 90s and a young man
when she was in her 90s and a young man fast around addressing all of his
fast around addressing all of his
fast around addressing all of his questions not to her but to me finally
questions not to her but to me finally
questions not to her but to me finally she couldn’t take it anymore she leant
she couldn’t take it anymore she leant
she couldn’t take it anymore she leant forward and in a stage whisper said what
forward and in a stage whisper said what
forward and in a stage whisper said what you suppose this nice young man would do
you suppose this nice young man would do
you suppose this nice young man would do if I told him to right off
we can all channel that spirit whether
we can all channel that spirit whether we are 90 or 19 we associate hags with
we are 90 or 19 we associate hags with
we are 90 or 19 we associate hags with age because we confuse cause and effect
age because we confuse cause and effect
age because we confuse cause and effect as young girls were taught to be pretty
as young girls were taught to be pretty
as young girls were taught to be pretty and compliant but age in stripping away
and compliant but age in stripping away
and compliant but age in stripping away the possibility of socially determined
the possibility of socially determined
the possibility of socially determined prettiness also liberates us from any
prettiness also liberates us from any
prettiness also liberates us from any impulse to be compliant there is nothing
impulse to be compliant there is nothing
impulse to be compliant there is nothing more subversive that a woman can do than
more subversive that a woman can do than
more subversive that a woman can do than to refuse to follow social rules because
to refuse to follow social rules because
to refuse to follow social rules because those rules were created to keep us in
those rules were created to keep us in
those rules were created to keep us in our place if all women were hags those
our place if all women were hags those
our place if all women were hags those rules would not exist yet while they do
rules would not exist yet while they do
rules would not exist yet while they do we can use that unasked-for invisibility
we can use that unasked-for invisibility
we can use that unasked-for invisibility consider Angela Merkel she is the matron
consider Angela Merkel she is the matron
consider Angela Merkel she is the matron saint of Haggar ease she is the world’s
saint of Haggar ease she is the world’s
saint of Haggar ease she is the world’s most visible invisible woman growing up
most visible invisible woman growing up
most visible invisible woman growing up in East Germany a police state she
in East Germany a police state she
in East Germany a police state she quickly learned the value of flying
quickly learned the value of flying
quickly learned the value of flying underneath the radar later divorced
underneath the radar later divorced
underneath the radar later divorced childless she succeeded in penetrating
childless she succeeded in penetrating
childless she succeeded in penetrating the highly traditionalist masculine
the highly traditionalist masculine
the highly traditionalist masculine dominated politics produced by West
dominated politics produced by West
dominated politics produced by West Germany she knew she couldn’t challenge
Germany she knew she couldn’t challenge
Germany she knew she couldn’t challenge that culture head-on so she hid in the
that culture head-on so she hid in the
that culture head-on so she hid in the considerable shadow of German Chancellor
considerable shadow of German Chancellor
considerable shadow of German Chancellor Helmut Kohl apparently tolerating it
Helmut Kohl apparently tolerating it
Helmut Kohl apparently tolerating it when he called her as he often did his
when he called her as he often did his
when he called her as he often did his little girl until the day she quietly
little girl until the day she quietly
little girl until the day she quietly authored the article that precipitated
authored the article that precipitated
authored the article that precipitated his resignation and even after that act
his resignation and even after that act
his resignation and even after that act of patricide her male rivals didn’t see
of patricide her male rivals didn’t see
of patricide her male rivals didn’t see her coming she dispatched every single
her coming she dispatched every single
her coming she dispatched every single one of them in 2005 becoming Germany’s
one of them in 2005 becoming Germany’s
one of them in 2005 becoming Germany’s first female and first East German
first female and first East German
first female and first East German Chancellor and even then
Chancellor and even then
Chancellor and even then underestimated which is by the way just
underestimated which is by the way just
underestimated which is by the way just how she likes it
how she likes it
how she likes it she for most of her time in office has
she for most of her time in office has
she for most of her time in office has been accused of doing too little
been accused of doing too little
been accused of doing too little all the while quietly achieving feats
all the while quietly achieving feats
all the while quietly achieving feats most politicians would only dream of
most politicians would only dream of
most politicians would only dream of holding together coalition’s of left and
holding together coalition’s of left and
holding together coalition’s of left and right
right
right calming eurozone turmoil building
calming eurozone turmoil building
calming eurozone turmoil building political capital when in 2016 she spent
political capital when in 2016 she spent
political capital when in 2016 she spent some of that capital throwing open the
some of that capital throwing open the
some of that capital throwing open the gates of Germany to the refugees massing
gates of Germany to the refugees massing
gates of Germany to the refugees massing on the border suddenly she was accused
on the border suddenly she was accused
on the border suddenly she was accused of doing too much then her critics said
of doing too much then her critics said
of doing too much then her critics said she was a busted flush and she couldn’t
she was a busted flush and she couldn’t
she was a busted flush and she couldn’t possibly win this year’s elections when
possibly win this year’s elections when
possibly win this year’s elections when she won this year’s elections they told
she won this year’s elections they told
she won this year’s elections they told her to resign because she hadn’t won big
her to resign because she hadn’t won big
her to resign because she hadn’t won big enough here’s something Merkel has said
enough here’s something Merkel has said
enough here’s something Merkel has said always be more than you appear and never
always be more than you appear and never
always be more than you appear and never appear to be more than you are
appear to be more than you are
appear to be more than you are compare and contrast that with another
compare and contrast that with another
compare and contrast that with another current world leader I actually think I
current world leader I actually think I
current world leader I actually think I am humble I think I am much more humble
am humble I think I am much more humble
am humble I think I am much more humble than you would understand that’s right
than you would understand that’s right
than you would understand that’s right Donald Trump even boasts about being
Donald Trump even boasts about being
Donald Trump even boasts about being humble the world needs more substance
humble the world needs more substance
humble the world needs more substance less braggadocio more leaders quietly
less braggadocio more leaders quietly
less braggadocio more leaders quietly dismantling barriers not presidents
dismantling barriers not presidents
dismantling barriers not presidents shouting about walls more hags though
shouting about walls more hags though
shouting about walls more hags though hags can walk invisible when they come
hags can walk invisible when they come
hags can walk invisible when they come together it can be a beautiful sight On
together it can be a beautiful sight On
together it can be a beautiful sight On January 21st five million hags and
January 21st five million hags and
January 21st five million hags and hagiographies took part in 673 marches
hagiographies took part in 673 marches
hagiographies took part in 673 marches across the world and in November 2016
across the world and in November 2016
across the world and in November 2016 1,500 hags and ha geographers converged
1,500 hags and ha geographers converged
1,500 hags and ha geographers converged in Manchester for the first-ever party
in Manchester for the first-ever party
in Manchester for the first-ever party conference of the women’s equality
conference of the women’s equality
conference of the women’s equality party to make the policies that are the
party to make the policies that are the
party to make the policies that are the bedrock of transformative politics those
bedrock of transformative politics those
bedrock of transformative politics those policies in turn quietly infiltrated the
policies in turn quietly infiltrated the
policies in turn quietly infiltrated the manifestos of the other parties at the
manifestos of the other parties at the
manifestos of the other parties at the general election now don’t get me wrong
general election now don’t get me wrong
general election now don’t get me wrong I look forward to the day when we can
I look forward to the day when we can
I look forward to the day when we can implement those policies directly a
implement those policies directly a
implement those policies directly a world that sees and values women will be
world that sees and values women will be
world that sees and values women will be better for all of us but to build that
better for all of us but to build that
better for all of us but to build that world we will have to use every tool at
world we will have to use every tool at
world we will have to use every tool at our disposal including that unasked-for
our disposal including that unasked-for
our disposal including that unasked-for invisibility as Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
invisibility as Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
invisibility as Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie so very nearly said we should all be
so very nearly said we should all be
so very nearly said we should all be hags thank you
”
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