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Wisdom of the herd | Ruud Knaapen | TEDxApeldoorn


what happened to you during this short

what happened to you during this short silence did it bring you more or less in

silence did it bring you more or less in

silence did it bring you more or less in contact with yourself your neighbor the

contact with yourself your neighbor the

contact with yourself your neighbor the whole audience or the space in between

whole audience or the space in between

whole audience or the space in between us I’ll leave that question to you what

us I’ll leave that question to you what

us I’ll leave that question to you what I do know is when we enter the silence

I do know is when we enter the silence

I do know is when we enter the silence we entered yes we we we enter the shared

we entered yes we we we enter the shared

we entered yes we we we enter the shared domain and that share domain has a

domain and that share domain has a

domain and that share domain has a certain quality in that share domain in

certain quality in that share domain in

certain quality in that share domain in that silence were equal we equal in the

that silence were equal we equal in the

that silence were equal we equal in the light of something bigger am I talking

light of something bigger am I talking

light of something bigger am I talking about God or something

about God or something

about God or something no I’m talking about a Hertz

no I’m talking about a Hertz

no I’m talking about a Hertz a herd of horses horses have survived

a herd of horses horses have survived

a herd of horses horses have survived for 65 million years by the wisdom of

for 65 million years by the wisdom of

for 65 million years by the wisdom of the earth horses are prey animals horses

the earth horses are prey animals horses

the earth horses are prey animals horses are probably more a we than a me she it

are probably more a we than a me she it

are probably more a we than a me she it happens always and always on the right

happens always and always on the right

happens always and always on the right moment so what interesting is all the

moment so what interesting is all the

moment so what interesting is all the information of the herd is still present

information of the herd is still present

information of the herd is still present in every single horse you meet every

in every single horse you meet every

in every single horse you meet every single horse you meet you can meet the

single horse you meet you can meet the

single horse you meet you can meet the wisdom of the whole herd you can make

wisdom of the whole herd you can make

wisdom of the whole herd you can make contact with the soul of the herd but

contact with the soul of the herd but

contact with the soul of the herd but for us humans is not so easy to get

for us humans is not so easy to get

for us humans is not so easy to get access to that information and that’s

access to that information and that’s

access to that information and that’s because for the simple reason we are

because for the simple reason we are

because for the simple reason we are predators

predators

predators we are predators because we think in

we are predators because we think in

we are predators because we think in lines they move in circles we think in

lines they move in circles we think in

lines they move in circles we think in goals in focus

goals in focus

goals in focus for her movement in itself is the most

for her movement in itself is the most

for her movement in itself is the most essence element for us dependency is

essence element for us dependency is

essence element for us dependency is something we have we have at least

something we have we have at least

something we have we have at least ambivalent emotion about for her

ambivalent emotion about for her

ambivalent emotion about for her dependency is a blessing but if we can

dependency is a blessing but if we can

dependency is a blessing but if we can connect in a way that she allows us to

connect in a way that she allows us to

connect in a way that she allows us to be part of her hurt then we can get

be part of her hurt then we can get

be part of her hurt then we can get access to vital information about a way

access to vital information about a way

access to vital information about a way we are connected to our own hurt our

we are connected to our own hurt our

we are connected to our own hurt our grandfathers our grandmothers everything

grandfathers our grandmothers everything

grandfathers our grandmothers everything which happens in our history everything

which happens in our history everything

which happens in our history everything which made us what we are right now why

which made us what we are right now why

which made us what we are right now why because she will tell you in a split

because she will tell you in a split

because she will tell you in a split second if you are a reliable member of

second if you are a reliable member of

second if you are a reliable member of the hood and it’s nothing personal it’s

the hood and it’s nothing personal it’s

the hood and it’s nothing personal it’s nothing personal it’s just feedback or

nothing personal it’s just feedback or

nothing personal it’s just feedback or feed-forward whatever you call it from

feed-forward whatever you call it from

feed-forward whatever you call it from with rooted back to the soul of the hood

with rooted back to the soul of the hood

with rooted back to the soul of the hood it’s not personal

first let me introduce you to us now

first let me introduce you to us now this is Kelly and she’s my leading man

this is Kelly and she’s my leading man

this is Kelly and she’s my leading man it touches me when she makes contact in

it touches me when she makes contact in

it touches me when she makes contact in this way yeah

this way yeah

this way yeah she’s 31 years old she’s my leading

she’s 31 years old she’s my leading

she’s 31 years old she’s my leading mayor and my name is whit whit Clara I’m

mayor and my name is whit whit Clara I’m

mayor and my name is whit whit Clara I’m a coach consultant and I work with the

a coach consultant and I work with the

a coach consultant and I work with the wisdom of the hurt in transformation

wisdom of the hurt in transformation

wisdom of the hurt in transformation processes in companies and on a personal

processes in companies and on a personal

processes in companies and on a personal level both when I bought her when I met

level both when I bought her when I met

level both when I bought her when I met her she was given up for dressage

her she was given up for dressage

her she was given up for dressage because she cannot bend because of her

because she cannot bend because of her

because she cannot bend because of her back problems so this horse had no

back problems so this horse had no

back problems so this horse had no future and that was a safe here at the

future and that was a safe here at the

future and that was a safe here at the time I looked at her and I thought I’m

time I looked at her and I thought I’m

time I looked at her and I thought I’m gonna save you but in fact

gonna save you but in fact

gonna save you but in fact she saved me how did this happen again

it’s nice it’s nice that you noticed

it’s nice it’s nice that you noticed that that she first asked me for this

that that she first asked me for this

that that she first asked me for this movement and then I say okay go and she

movement and then I say okay go and she

movement and then I say okay go and she makes it

makes it

makes it I worked for two years every day every

I worked for two years every day every

I worked for two years every day every hour every minute every second and with

hour every minute every second and with

hour every minute every second and with every minute I could get my hands on to

every minute I could get my hands on to

every minute I could get my hands on to get in real contact with her but she

get in real contact with her but she

get in real contact with her but she didn’t allow me

didn’t allow me

didn’t allow me she just didn’t allow me I was totally

she just didn’t allow me I was totally

she just didn’t allow me I was totally obsessed with it two years long till one

obsessed with it two years long till one

obsessed with it two years long till one morning one Saturday morning she was

morning one Saturday morning she was

morning one Saturday morning she was standing in a paddock in the corner and

standing in a paddock in the corner and

standing in a paddock in the corner and the session ended the same as all the

the session ended the same as all the

the session ended the same as all the sessions before

sessions before

sessions before carolien standing in the corner her back

carolien standing in the corner her back

carolien standing in the corner her back towards me stiff no options to move and

towards me stiff no options to move and

towards me stiff no options to move and I was waiting in the middle waiting for

I was waiting in the middle waiting for

I was waiting in the middle waiting for something to happened but she could not

something to happened but she could not

something to happened but she could not escape there was so much pressure and

escape there was so much pressure and

escape there was so much pressure and this morning the same thing happened but

this morning the same thing happened but

this morning the same thing happened but I saw something different

I saw something different

I saw something different and I couldn’t look at it anymore

and I couldn’t look at it anymore

and I couldn’t look at it anymore and I just I know I remember it I turned

and I just I know I remember it I turned

and I just I know I remember it I turned around but it was too late it was too

around but it was too late it was too

around but it was too late it was too late because the picture of her so

late because the picture of her so

late because the picture of her so frozen in the corner had already hit my

frozen in the corner had already hit my

frozen in the corner had already hit my body it just hit my body and my head

body it just hit my body and my head

body it just hit my body and my head became dizzy my legs became heavy and

became dizzy my legs became heavy and

became dizzy my legs became heavy and there was this unknown pain which flow

there was this unknown pain which flow

there was this unknown pain which flow to my to my body and it must have been

to my to my body and it must have been

to my to my body and it must have been there for a very very long time and it

there for a very very long time and it

there for a very very long time and it was so strange because in that moment I

was so strange because in that moment I

was so strange because in that moment I heard a deep right beside me and I felt

heard a deep right beside me and I felt

heard a deep right beside me and I felt three whiskers nose hairs tickling

three whiskers nose hairs tickling

three whiskers nose hairs tickling against the back of my hand for the

against the back of my hand for the

against the back of my hand for the first time Caelian stood right beside me

first time Caelian stood right beside me

first time Caelian stood right beside me right behind me for the first time she

right behind me for the first time she

right behind me for the first time she allowed me to be part of her hood and

allowed me to be part of her hood and

allowed me to be part of her hood and more important maybe I had become part

more important maybe I had become part

more important maybe I had become part of my of my own hood of my own in a hood

miron I want you to ask you to take

miron I want you to ask you to take Kelly in with you just my daughter thank

Kelly in with you just my daughter thank

Kelly in with you just my daughter thank you very much

after that moment with Caelian my own

after that moment with Caelian my own learning moment I became a horse’s head

learning moment I became a horse’s head

learning moment I became a horse’s head coach and ten years later I’m standing

coach and ten years later I’m standing

coach and ten years later I’m standing in a riding school in a Manish it was a

in a riding school in a Manish it was a

in a riding school in a Manish it was a seminar it was a seminar about personal

seminar it was a seminar about personal

seminar it was a seminar about personal issues and there was this all the woman

issues and there was this all the woman

issues and there was this all the woman who comes to me I think she was 65 years

who comes to me I think she was 65 years

who comes to me I think she was 65 years old she looks at me and she says I have

old she looks at me and she says I have

old she looks at me and she says I have a rather difficult heavy issue and you

a rather difficult heavy issue and you

a rather difficult heavy issue and you know I don’t want to talk about it but

know I don’t want to talk about it but

know I don’t want to talk about it but maybe I can look at it can you help me I

maybe I can look at it can you help me I

maybe I can look at it can you help me I said yes but I didn’t know how and we

said yes but I didn’t know how and we

said yes but I didn’t know how and we started the seminar I know I remember

started the seminar I know I remember

started the seminar I know I remember and there was first was a guy who went

and there was first was a guy who went

and there was first was a guy who went into the paddock but the horse couldn’t

into the paddock but the horse couldn’t

into the paddock but the horse couldn’t connect to the guy because it was

connect to the guy because it was

connect to the guy because it was already connected to that woman and the

already connected to that woman and the

already connected to that woman and the horse stood still in front of that woman

horse stood still in front of that woman

horse stood still in front of that woman on one meter distance in total silence

on one meter distance in total silence

on one meter distance in total silence with only the rope in between them and

with only the rope in between them and

with only the rope in between them and it was such a silence it had such a

it was such a silence it had such a

it was such a silence it had such a waited everyone in the group

waited everyone in the group

waited everyone in the group instinctively moved backwards to make

instinctively moved backwards to make

instinctively moved backwards to make space for the process which happened and

space for the process which happened and

space for the process which happened and what I saw was this deep interaction

what I saw was this deep interaction

what I saw was this deep interaction this woman sitting with her hands on her

this woman sitting with her hands on her

this woman sitting with her hands on her lap receiving whatever it was in full

lap receiving whatever it was in full

lap receiving whatever it was in full contact with the horse in totally

contact with the horse in totally

contact with the horse in totally silence and a sentence hit me it

silence and a sentence hit me it

silence and a sentence hit me it top it was not my sentence it came from

top it was not my sentence it came from

top it was not my sentence it came from out of the field and because I promised

out of the field and because I promised

out of the field and because I promised her not to speak I said it in my head

her not to speak I said it in my head

her not to speak I said it in my head and the sentence was dear child when

and the sentence was dear child when

and the sentence was dear child when it’s my time I will follow you and she

it’s my time I will follow you and she

it’s my time I will follow you and she looked at me I was just it not was the

looked at me I was just it not was the

looked at me I was just it not was the end of the session and after the seminar

end of the session and after the seminar

end of the session and after the seminar she comes to me again

she comes to me again

she comes to me again she says Ruth thank you and your horse

she says Ruth thank you and your horse

she says Ruth thank you and your horse for offering me the possibility to look

for offering me the possibility to look

for offering me the possibility to look at my firstborn child who died

at my firstborn child who died

at my firstborn child who died immediately for the first time she was

immediately for the first time she was

immediately for the first time she was 65 years old and she continued

65 years old and she continued

65 years old and she continued it’s a strange I feel more connected

it’s a strange I feel more connected

it’s a strange I feel more connected with him than ever and it’s so strange I

with him than ever and it’s so strange I

with him than ever and it’s so strange I feel more alive than ever and moreover

feel more alive than ever and moreover

feel more alive than ever and moreover in some kind of silly way I feel open

in some kind of silly way I feel open

in some kind of silly way I feel open for everything to come and I was

for everything to come and I was

for everything to come and I was flabbergasted and I looked at her I

flabbergasted and I looked at her I

flabbergasted and I looked at her I looked at her face there was no emotion

looked at her face there was no emotion

looked at her face there was no emotion no drama no tears nothing what I saw

no drama no tears nothing what I saw

no drama no tears nothing what I saw what I noticed what she entered another

what I noticed what she entered another

what I noticed what she entered another state and I call it a wee state a wee

state and I call it a wee state a wee

state and I call it a wee state a wee state

it was the first time in her life she

it was the first time in her life she looked at this very dramatic event for a

looked at this very dramatic event for a

looked at this very dramatic event for a moderates it’s dramatic when you lose

moderates it’s dramatic when you lose

moderates it’s dramatic when you lose your child and now she had looked at it

your child and now she had looked at it

your child and now she had looked at it until then she could not look at it she

until then she could not look at it she

until then she could not look at it she had excluded it from her life she had

had excluded it from her life she had

had excluded it from her life she had excluded it from her past

excluded it from her past

excluded it from her past and now it was included she was no

and now it was included she was no

and now it was included she was no longer separated from her past but had

longer separated from her past but had

longer separated from her past but had become a part of it and feyza feyza the

become a part of it and feyza feyza the

become a part of it and feyza feyza the past had become a part of her life like

past had become a part of her life like

past had become a part of her life like a like a source like a resource and the

a like a source like a resource and the

a like a source like a resource and the strength to say about such an event

Dennis what the horses do this is what

Dennis what the horses do this is what horses do and to be honest I don’t

horses do and to be honest I don’t

horses do and to be honest I don’t understand how it works there yes there

understand how it works there yes there

understand how it works there yes there is scientific research search for

is scientific research search for

is scientific research search for written on Google that I don’t

written on Google that I don’t

written on Google that I don’t understand but I see it happen what I

understand but I see it happen what I

understand but I see it happen what I see happen is that they offer us a we

see happen is that they offer us a we

see happen is that they offer us a we state and in that we state we’re in some

state and in that we state we’re in some

state and in that we state we’re in some kind of way are very gently open for

kind of way are very gently open for

kind of way are very gently open for everything reality gives us and has

everything reality gives us and has

everything reality gives us and has given us our blessings our traumas full

given us our blessings our traumas full

given us our blessings our traumas full potential everything in a strange way

potential everything in a strange way

potential everything in a strange way everything it’s it’s it’s everything

everything it’s it’s it’s everything

everything it’s it’s it’s everything which made us who we are and probably

which made us who we are and probably

which made us who we are and probably what we what we will what we will be but

what we what we will what we will be but

what we what we will what we will be but it’s a resource that is what I was doing

it’s a resource that is what I was doing

it’s a resource that is what I was doing thank you very much this was what I

thank you very much this was what I

thank you very much this was what I wanted to share with you with without

wanted to share with you with without

wanted to share with you with without galleon

galleon

galleon [Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause] [Music]

[Music]

[Music] [Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause] [Music]

[Music]

[Music] [Applause]

”

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