when I was first asked to do this I suppose I was kind of feeling like I
suppose I was kind of feeling like I
suppose I was kind of feeling like I don’t know like
don’t know like
don’t know like sure about what I talked about and I’m
sure about what I talked about and I’m
sure about what I talked about and I’m not like an expert on anything and then
not like an expert on anything and then
not like an expert on anything and then I thought again and I kind of get asked
I thought again and I kind of get asked
I thought again and I kind of get asked the same questions every day whether it
the same questions every day whether it
the same questions every day whether it be through an interview or through young
be through an interview or through young
be through an interview or through young girls and boys messaging me on snapchat
girls and boys messaging me on snapchat
girls and boys messaging me on snapchat or online on Twitter and Instagram and
or online on Twitter and Instagram and
or online on Twitter and Instagram and the questions are usually how did you
the questions are usually how did you
the questions are usually how did you get into your job so young what
get into your job so young what
get into your job so young what difficulties do you face in your job and
difficulties do you face in your job and
difficulties do you face in your job and how do you say so happy all the time
how do you say so happy all the time
how do you say so happy all the time when you’re so busy and so I kind of
when you’re so busy and so I kind of
when you’re so busy and so I kind of reply to these questions and I’ve
reply to these questions and I’ve
reply to these questions and I’ve answered interviews and given these
answered interviews and given these
answered interviews and given these answers but I’ve never really told like
answers but I’ve never really told like
answers but I’ve never really told like the whole story behind things and I’ve
the whole story behind things and I’ve
the whole story behind things and I’ve never really given a full answer whoever
never really given a full answer whoever
never really given a full answer whoever actually explained like the whole truth
actually explained like the whole truth
actually explained like the whole truth I suppose so we’ve just been a little
I suppose so we’ve just been a little
I suppose so we’ve just been a little tastes maybe because I’ve been a bit
tastes maybe because I’ve been a bit
tastes maybe because I’ve been a bit scared or there’s never been the right
scared or there’s never been the right
scared or there’s never been the right time or just not the right platform and
time or just not the right platform and
time or just not the right platform and so I’ve been asked to do this today I
so I’ve been asked to do this today I
so I’ve been asked to do this today I was like okay well there’s the platform
was like okay well there’s the platform
was like okay well there’s the platform and time and wise I feel like now more
and time and wise I feel like now more
and time and wise I feel like now more than ever it’s so important for people
than ever it’s so important for people
than ever it’s so important for people with a platform and people with a follow
with a platform and people with a follow
with a platform and people with a follow in to show transparency and to show
in to show transparency and to show
in to show transparency and to show truth and honesty behind the highlight
truth and honesty behind the highlight
truth and honesty behind the highlight reel of Instagram and Twitter and behind
reel of Instagram and Twitter and behind
reel of Instagram and Twitter and behind all the flashing lights and cameras and
all the flashing lights and cameras and
all the flashing lights and cameras and everyone’s filtered edited images and
everyone’s filtered edited images and
everyone’s filtered edited images and stuff for someone that has got people
stuff for someone that has got people
stuff for someone that has got people that look up to them to be honest about
that look up to them to be honest about
that look up to them to be honest about their experiences in hope that maybe
their experiences in hope that maybe
their experiences in hope that maybe someone in this audience or someone
someone in this audience or someone
someone in this audience or someone that’s watching at home online hello
that’s watching at home online hello
that’s watching at home online hello might relate to something I say or might
might relate to something I say or might
might relate to something I say or might be going through something that I’ve
be going through something that I’ve
be going through something that I’ve been through before and it could help
been through before and it could help
been through before and it could help them come out the other way or just give
them come out the other way or just give
them come out the other way or just give them some kind of hope so I’m gonna talk
them some kind of hope so I’m gonna talk
them some kind of hope so I’m gonna talk about myself and my life starting all
about myself and my life starting all
about myself and my life starting all the way back from where I was born in
the way back from where I was born in
the way back from where I was born in Bristol
Bristol
Bristol I grew up which is like a small safe
I grew up which is like a small safe
I grew up which is like a small safe outside of London and Bristol is an
outside of London and Bristol is an
outside of London and Bristol is an amazing place I don’t know if anyone’s
amazing place I don’t know if anyone’s
amazing place I don’t know if anyone’s been there before but growing up there
been there before but growing up there
been there before but growing up there like people are really happy I always
like people are really happy I always
like people are really happy I always felt safe like it was just it was
felt safe like it was just it was
felt safe like it was just it was beautiful it was absolutely lovely
beautiful it was absolutely lovely
beautiful it was absolutely lovely my mum’s Swedish and Scottish actually
my mum’s Swedish and Scottish actually
my mum’s Swedish and Scottish actually and my dad’s from Somalia but they’re
and my dad’s from Somalia but they’re
and my dad’s from Somalia but they’re both British so I grew up with them in a
both British so I grew up with them in a
both British so I grew up with them in a nice little house from very little house
nice little house from very little house
nice little house from very little house in st. Paul’s in Bristol and when I was
in st. Paul’s in Bristol and when I was
in st. Paul’s in Bristol and when I was about three my dad went to jail which at
about three my dad went to jail which at
about three my dad went to jail which at the time I suppose I was three years old
the time I suppose I was three years old
the time I suppose I was three years old so I didn’t really know what was going
so I didn’t really know what was going
so I didn’t really know what was going on
on
on around that stage of him first going to
around that stage of him first going to
around that stage of him first going to gel it all felt kind of normal so I grew
gel it all felt kind of normal so I grew
gel it all felt kind of normal so I grew up with my younger brother who’s 19 our
up with my younger brother who’s 19 our
up with my younger brother who’s 19 our two years below me and my most I so my
two years below me and my most I so my
two years below me and my most I so my strongest memories of around that time
strongest memories of around that time
strongest memories of around that time of the initial experience of going to
of the initial experience of going to
of the initial experience of going to visit him in jail and we’d get into the
visit him in jail and we’d get into the
visit him in jail and we’d get into the car and we’d have like I do they and you
car and we’d have like I do they and you
car and we’d have like I do they and you get little sweets and it always felt
get little sweets and it always felt
get little sweets and it always felt like a little road trip it was never
like a little road trip it was never
like a little road trip it was never like this is a very big place but
like this is a very big place but
like this is a very big place but thinking back on it now like you’d go as
thinking back on it now like you’d go as
thinking back on it now like you’d go as a tiny little child you’d fall asleep in
a tiny little child you’d fall asleep in
a tiny little child you’d fall asleep in the car and end up outside this huge
the car and end up outside this huge
the car and end up outside this huge gray building and get searched by dogs
gray building and get searched by dogs
gray building and get searched by dogs and then have to sit across the table
and then have to sit across the table
and then have to sit across the table and have the conversation with a man
and have the conversation with a man
and have the conversation with a man that you were slowly not really
that you were slowly not really
that you were slowly not really recognizing or not really showing much
recognizing or not really showing much
recognizing or not really showing much interest to because he was always there
interest to because he was always there
interest to because he was always there and I was always at home and I was
and I was always at home and I was
and I was always at home and I was having this life with my mum and my
having this life with my mum and my
having this life with my mum and my aunties and my Nana and granddad on his
aunties and my Nana and granddad on his
aunties and my Nana and granddad on his side and my family were always so
side and my family were always so
side and my family were always so supportive and did everything that I
supportive and did everything that I
supportive and did everything that I suppose the dad would do that I didn’t
suppose the dad would do that I didn’t
suppose the dad would do that I didn’t ever feel like I was missing out on
ever feel like I was missing out on
ever feel like I was missing out on anything so when I go to nursery or when
anything so when I go to nursery or when
anything so when I go to nursery or when I go to primary school and everybody
I go to primary school and everybody
I go to primary school and everybody would be talking I never felt like I was
would be talking I never felt like I was
would be talking I never felt like I was missing out on anything and my life
missing out on anything and my life
missing out on anything and my life seemed perfect apart from these weird
seemed perfect apart from these weird
seemed perfect apart from these weird little trips that we’d have to keep on
little trips that we’d have to keep on
little trips that we’d have to keep on doing to prisons in Wales and I don’t
doing to prisons in Wales and I don’t
doing to prisons in Wales and I don’t know across the other side of the sea so
know across the other side of the sea so
know across the other side of the sea so that went on I kind of continued to
that went on I kind of continued to
that went on I kind of continued to visit him and have this distant
visit him and have this distant
visit him and have this distant relationship with my dad and it wasn’t
relationship with my dad and it wasn’t
relationship with my dad and it wasn’t like one long sentence that he got it
like one long sentence that he got it
like one long sentence that he got it was always like maybe like a year or two
was always like maybe like a year or two
was always like maybe like a year or two and then come out and go back in and
and then come out and go back in and
and then come out and go back in and then by the age of 10 I think around ten
then by the age of 10 I think around ten
then by the age of 10 I think around ten it kind of got a bit exhausting and I
it kind of got a bit exhausting and I
it kind of got a bit exhausting and I remember thinking I’m starting to go to
remember thinking I’m starting to go to
remember thinking I’m starting to go to my friend’s house is now and I’m saying
my friend’s house is now and I’m saying
my friend’s house is now and I’m saying their family’s out and they’ve got these
their family’s out and they’ve got these
their family’s out and they’ve got these amazing relationships with their dads
amazing relationships with their dads
amazing relationships with their dads and their dad’s always there and takes
and their dad’s always there and takes
and their dad’s always there and takes them out two trips and I was like well I
them out two trips and I was like well I
them out two trips and I was like well I don’t do that and yeah I have amazing
don’t do that and yeah I have amazing
don’t do that and yeah I have amazing aunties and Nana granddad that do stuff
aunties and Nana granddad that do stuff
aunties and Nana granddad that do stuff but that’s not really fair like you
but that’s not really fair like you
but that’s not really fair like you should probably be making a bit more
should probably be making a bit more
should probably be making a bit more effort to stop doing bad things and I
effort to stop doing bad things and I
effort to stop doing bad things and I was at the age where I realized like
was at the age where I realized like
was at the age where I realized like it’s a choice it’s not something that
it’s a choice it’s not something that
it’s a choice it’s not something that you’re forced to do you don’t have to be
you’re forced to do you don’t have to be
you’re forced to do you don’t have to be in jail basically so I decided stop
in jail basically so I decided stop
in jail basically so I decided stop visiting here
visiting here
visiting here at 10:00 around 10:00 11:00 and I
at 10:00 around 10:00 11:00 and I
at 10:00 around 10:00 11:00 and I remember one day he’d come home not home
remember one day he’d come home not home
remember one day he’d come home not home but he’d come to my Nana granddad’s
but he’d come to my Nana granddad’s
but he’d come to my Nana granddad’s house where I was at the time and he
house where I was at the time and he
house where I was at the time and he asked to speak to me and I was just like
asked to speak to me and I was just like
asked to speak to me and I was just like no I don’t want to speak to you anymore
no I don’t want to speak to you anymore
no I don’t want to speak to you anymore and I’d also kind of realized like that
and I’d also kind of realized like that
and I’d also kind of realized like that he wasn’t so good to my mom and just all
he wasn’t so good to my mom and just all
he wasn’t so good to my mom and just all of these things kind of started to make
of these things kind of started to make
of these things kind of started to make sense to me at that age and I just
sense to me at that age and I just
sense to me at that age and I just completely cut off contact with him
completely cut off contact with him
completely cut off contact with him my little brother decided to still see
my little brother decided to still see
my little brother decided to still see him but I was just kind of over it so
him but I was just kind of over it so
him but I was just kind of over it so went past primary school into secondary
went past primary school into secondary
went past primary school into secondary school now and this is where I kind of
school now and this is where I kind of
school now and this is where I kind of start talking about my career and I’ve
start talking about my career and I’ve
start talking about my career and I’ve always been like a loud like show or fie
always been like a loud like show or fie
always been like a loud like show or fie performing artsy person where I go
performing artsy person where I go
performing artsy person where I go downstairs and perform the no doubt
downstairs and perform the no doubt
downstairs and perform the no doubt album with dance routines and acting
album with dance routines and acting
album with dance routines and acting segments to Menomonie stepdad like come
segments to Menomonie stepdad like come
segments to Menomonie stepdad like come on watch me and like make all the family
on watch me and like make all the family
on watch me and like make all the family relatives sit down and watch my serious
relatives sit down and watch my serious
relatives sit down and watch my serious performance of like I don’t know Bob the
performance of like I don’t know Bob the
performance of like I don’t know Bob the Builder
Builder
Builder so I did all of that stuff started
so I did all of that stuff started
so I did all of that stuff started secondary school and was like yeah like
secondary school and was like yeah like
secondary school and was like yeah like loved it made amazing friends had an
loved it made amazing friends had an
loved it made amazing friends had an amazing childhood basically an early
amazing childhood basically an early
amazing childhood basically an early teens everything was perfect enjoyed it
teens everything was perfect enjoyed it
teens everything was perfect enjoyed it and I remember having conversations with
and I remember having conversations with
and I remember having conversations with like family members and stuff in like
like family members and stuff in like
like family members and stuff in like year seven and eight and they’d be like
year seven and eight and they’d be like
year seven and eight and they’d be like what you want to be when you’re older
what you want to be when you’re older
what you want to be when you’re older what you want to do and I’d always be
what you want to do and I’d always be
what you want to do and I’d always be like I’m not really sure how I’m gonna
like I’m not really sure how I’m gonna
like I’m not really sure how I’m gonna get there but like I’m definitely gonna
get there but like I’m definitely gonna
get there but like I’m definitely gonna be on TV or I’m gonna be someone that’s
be on TV or I’m gonna be someone that’s
be on TV or I’m gonna be someone that’s in the adverts or on the screen and like
in the adverts or on the screen and like
in the adverts or on the screen and like part of me really really believes that I
part of me really really believes that I
part of me really really believes that I would and I’m not sure where it came
would and I’m not sure where it came
would and I’m not sure where it came from but it was kind of like an inner
from but it was kind of like an inner
from but it was kind of like an inner thing of like what I’m gonna do that
thing of like what I’m gonna do that
thing of like what I’m gonna do that because there’s nothing else I want to
because there’s nothing else I want to
because there’s nothing else I want to do I’ve never even allowed any other
do I’ve never even allowed any other
do I’ve never even allowed any other career option to enter my mind it’s just
career option to enter my mind it’s just
career option to enter my mind it’s just been like yep he’s gonna be this person
been like yep he’s gonna be this person
been like yep he’s gonna be this person and that’s gonna happen and thinking
and that’s gonna happen and thinking
and that’s gonna happen and thinking back on it now it’s like I’m not really
back on it now it’s like I’m not really
back on it now it’s like I’m not really sure if that’s like a naivety or just
sure if that’s like a naivety or just
sure if that’s like a naivety or just like in my own little glorious bubble of
like in my own little glorious bubble of
like in my own little glorious bubble of like dream but it was real enough to me
like dream but it was real enough to me
like dream but it was real enough to me at the time and yeah obviously worked
at the time and yeah obviously worked
at the time and yeah obviously worked out in the end but yes I always had this
out in the end but yes I always had this
out in the end but yes I always had this idea went through school and got to year
idea went through school and got to year
idea went through school and got to year 10 does anyone remember skins the show
10 does anyone remember skins the show
10 does anyone remember skins the show yeah that skins so that was shot in
yeah that skins so that was shot in
yeah that skins so that was shot in Bristol and they would go around the
Bristol and they would go around the
Bristol and they would go around the school was to cast for four skins so I
school was to cast for four skins so I
school was to cast for four skins so I was 15 and they came to our school when
was 15 and they came to our school when
was 15 and they came to our school when I was like right this is my chance I’m
I was like right this is my chance I’m
I was like right this is my chance I’m gonna go in there and well
gonna go in there and well
gonna go in there and well everyone like this really excited little
everyone like this really excited little
everyone like this really excited little girl and they came in and I did that I
girl and they came in and I did that I
girl and they came in and I did that I don’t even really remember my
don’t even really remember my
don’t even really remember my performance but I know I was so excited
performance but I know I was so excited
performance but I know I was so excited and literally like in the hallway to my
and literally like in the hallway to my
and literally like in the hallway to my friends like yeah so did that ended up
friends like yeah so did that ended up
friends like yeah so did that ended up getting to the last round of like I
getting to the last round of like I
getting to the last round of like I don’t even know how many hundreds of
don’t even know how many hundreds of
don’t even know how many hundreds of kids they’d seen to be one of the main
kids they’d seen to be one of the main
kids they’d seen to be one of the main characters and then got to the last
characters and then got to the last
characters and then got to the last audition did it left thinking yeah this
audition did it left thinking yeah this
audition did it left thinking yeah this is it like I’ve got it and actually sat
is it like I’ve got it and actually sat
is it like I’ve got it and actually sat in my kitchen once I remember like
in my kitchen once I remember like
in my kitchen once I remember like having this conversation my mom and
having this conversation my mom and
having this conversation my mom and being like what am I gonna do I’m gonna
being like what am I gonna do I’m gonna
being like what am I gonna do I’m gonna be famous like how am I gonna sell my
be famous like how am I gonna sell my
be famous like how am I gonna sell my friends like it’s so convinced that this
friends like it’s so convinced that this
friends like it’s so convinced that this was going to be it that like no one
was going to be it that like no one
was going to be it that like no one could tell me any difference and I kind
could tell me any difference and I kind
could tell me any difference and I kind of missed that confidence so I had been
of missed that confidence so I had been
of missed that confidence so I had been because I suppose as you get older
because I suppose as you get older
because I suppose as you get older reality and everything else and it
reality and everything else and it
reality and everything else and it doesn’t seem so real but yeah super
doesn’t seem so real but yeah super
doesn’t seem so real but yeah super super confidence and then I didn’t get
super confidence and then I didn’t get
super confidence and then I didn’t get it and I was like oh right well now and
it and I was like oh right well now and
it and I was like oh right well now and half of it made me feel like I don’t
half of it made me feel like I don’t
half of it made me feel like I don’t want to do anymore like I don’t want to
want to do anymore like I don’t want to
want to do anymore like I don’t want to act I don’t want to put myself out there
act I don’t want to put myself out there
act I don’t want to put myself out there and get so convinced and telling my
and get so convinced and telling my
and get so convinced and telling my friends I’m gonna be like the next I
friends I’m gonna be like the next I
friends I’m gonna be like the next I don’t know Jennifer Lawrence but and
don’t know Jennifer Lawrence but and
don’t know Jennifer Lawrence but and then not have it but the other half of
then not have it but the other half of
then not have it but the other half of me was like well no out of all of these
me was like well no out of all of these
me was like well no out of all of these hundreds of kids
hundreds of kids
hundreds of kids I’m obviously good enough to get to that
I’m obviously good enough to get to that
I’m obviously good enough to get to that stage so why not carry on and keep
stage so why not carry on and keep
stage so why not carry on and keep pushing forward and going for more
pushing forward and going for more
pushing forward and going for more auditions so that’s someone and went in
auditions so that’s someone and went in
auditions so that’s someone and went in joins an acting class and applied for
joins an acting class and applied for
joins an acting class and applied for these auditions and went out and just
these auditions and went out and just
these auditions and went out and just did as much as I could because I still
did as much as I could because I still
did as much as I could because I still had this like huge hunger inside of me
had this like huge hunger inside of me
had this like huge hunger inside of me and then got to year 11 and continued
and then got to year 11 and continued
and then got to year 11 and continued were there and was like yep this is what
were there and was like yep this is what
were there and was like yep this is what I want to do we were choosing our levels
I want to do we were choosing our levels
I want to do we were choosing our levels and everything after that so I went on
and everything after that so I went on
and everything after that so I went on to sixth form in cotton cotton school in
to sixth form in cotton cotton school in
to sixth form in cotton cotton school in Bristol and I chose what I did sociology
Bristol and I chose what I did sociology
Bristol and I chose what I did sociology performing arts BT media and English Lit
performing arts BT media and English Lit
performing arts BT media and English Lit and so I member starting those but even
and so I member starting those but even
and so I member starting those but even in my mind the whole time I was always
in my mind the whole time I was always
in my mind the whole time I was always thinking like okay yeah these are just
thinking like okay yeah these are just
thinking like okay yeah these are just my what I’m supposed to do like this is
my what I’m supposed to do like this is
my what I’m supposed to do like this is just the next step that you’re supposed
just the next step that you’re supposed
just the next step that you’re supposed to take after school because that’s what
to take after school because that’s what
to take after school because that’s what everyone does and it’s proper but don’t
everyone does and it’s proper but don’t
everyone does and it’s proper but don’t lose sight of your amazing little dream
lose sight of your amazing little dream
lose sight of your amazing little dream of being you know Selena Gomez without
of being you know Selena Gomez without
of being you know Selena Gomez without the singing voice so yeah have that and
the singing voice so yeah have that and
the singing voice so yeah have that and then that there was some there was like
then that there was some there was like
then that there was some there was like a holiday in
a holiday in
a holiday in that period of time hang on me let me
that period of time hang on me let me
that period of time hang on me let me have what because my mouth dry I knew
have what because my mouth dry I knew
have what because my mouth dry I knew that would happen to me out of everyone
that would happen to me out of everyone
that would happen to me out of everyone I’m the one that gets dry for halfway
I’m the one that gets dry for halfway
I’m the one that gets dry for halfway through but yeah so there was a holiday
through but yeah so there was a holiday
through but yeah so there was a holiday in between like a school holiday and I
in between like a school holiday and I
in between like a school holiday and I remember going up to London because I
remember going up to London because I
remember going up to London because I had a family member that lived there and
had a family member that lived there and
had a family member that lived there and I just I had a couple of auditions in
I just I had a couple of auditions in
I just I had a couple of auditions in London and I felt like I don’t know
London and I felt like I don’t know
London and I felt like I don’t know anyone coming from a smaller safe always
anyone coming from a smaller safe always
anyone coming from a smaller safe always assumes that like London is the place
assumes that like London is the place
assumes that like London is the place you need to be like that so everything
you need to be like that so everything
you need to be like that so everything happens and if you want to be a star you
happens and if you want to be a star you
happens and if you want to be a star you go to London which is the case for some
go to London which is the case for some
go to London which is the case for some people but some people can do it and in
people but some people can do it and in
people but some people can do it and in their hometown so yeah I went to London
their hometown so yeah I went to London
their hometown so yeah I went to London and I spent some time there and I met
and I spent some time there and I met
and I spent some time there and I met some people and I thought I’m nearly
some people and I thought I’m nearly
some people and I thought I’m nearly finished in my first year of six film
finished in my first year of six film
finished in my first year of six film why don’t I apply for colleges in London
why don’t I apply for colleges in London
why don’t I apply for colleges in London and even though everything in my life
and even though everything in my life
and even though everything in my life was perfect in Bristow I had like great
was perfect in Bristow I had like great
was perfect in Bristow I had like great friends great family everything’s very
friends great family everything’s very
friends great family everything’s very exciting because you just left school
exciting because you just left school
exciting because you just left school when everyone go out and we’ll I just
when everyone go out and we’ll I just
when everyone go out and we’ll I just thought London’s the place where you
thought London’s the place where you
thought London’s the place where you where you kind of need to be if you want
where you kind of need to be if you want
where you kind of need to be if you want to do my job and I still had that con
to do my job and I still had that con
to do my job and I still had that con line you can do it can be found in my
line you can do it can be found in my
line you can do it can be found in my mind so I applied for like five colleges
mind so I applied for like five colleges
mind so I applied for like five colleges and came back to Bristol I don’t think I
and came back to Bristol I don’t think I
and came back to Bristol I don’t think I even told anyone at the time that I’d
even told anyone at the time that I’d
even told anyone at the time that I’d applied for that money because I didn’t
applied for that money because I didn’t
applied for that money because I didn’t want to do the disappointment of not
want to do the disappointment of not
want to do the disappointment of not actually getting in but I applied for
actually getting in but I applied for
actually getting in but I applied for them anyway
them anyway
them anyway came back to Bristol told everyone okay
came back to Bristol told everyone okay
came back to Bristol told everyone okay now I might go there it’s the waiting
now I might go there it’s the waiting
now I might go there it’s the waiting process we had a summer holiday no sorry
process we had a summer holiday no sorry
process we had a summer holiday no sorry it was before summer holidays another
it was before summer holidays another
it was before summer holidays another gap where I went up to London again and
gap where I went up to London again and
gap where I went up to London again and I’m a boy and he was he became a
I’m a boy and he was he became a
I’m a boy and he was he became a boyfriend and then I was completely
boyfriend and then I was completely
boyfriend and then I was completely infatuated 16 years old your first love
infatuated 16 years old your first love
infatuated 16 years old your first love and you’re in this like whole dream
and you’re in this like whole dream
and you’re in this like whole dream world and I was thinking like wow this
world and I was thinking like wow this
world and I was thinking like wow this is perfect like if I move to London I’m
is perfect like if I move to London I’m
is perfect like if I move to London I’m gonna get into these colleges I’ll have
gonna get into these colleges I’ll have
gonna get into these colleges I’ll have my boyfriend there I’ve got friends that
my boyfriend there I’ve got friends that
my boyfriend there I’ve got friends that I’ve made and everything’s just gonna be
I’ve made and everything’s just gonna be
I’ve made and everything’s just gonna be like an absolute dream and in my mind
like an absolute dream and in my mind
like an absolute dream and in my mind and then that summer holiday after so I
and then that summer holiday after so I
and then that summer holiday after so I finished my first year of six for now
finished my first year of six for now
finished my first year of six for now and it’s the holidays before I decide if
and it’s the holidays before I decide if
and it’s the holidays before I decide if I’m going to go to college in London or
I’m going to go to college in London or
I’m going to go to college in London or stay in Bristol but to be fair I hadn’t
stay in Bristol but to be fair I hadn’t
stay in Bristol but to be fair I hadn’t really reapplied in Bristol so London
really reapplied in Bristol so London
really reapplied in Bristol so London was my only option
was my only option
was my only option I hadn’t really got that push in my mind
I hadn’t really got that push in my mind
I hadn’t really got that push in my mind and and it was July and it was halfway
and and it was July and it was halfway
and and it was July and it was halfway through the holidays and I’m kind of
through the holidays and I’m kind of
through the holidays and I’m kind of puff in London
puff in London
puff in London in Bristol and then my boyfriend at the
in Bristol and then my boyfriend at the
in Bristol and then my boyfriend at the time was killed and so has a 16 year old
time was killed and so has a 16 year old
time was killed and so has a 16 year old girl that has all of this like dreams
girl that has all of this like dreams
girl that has all of this like dreams and everything’s perfect in her mind it
and everything’s perfect in her mind it
and everything’s perfect in her mind it was kind of like Oh like that’s not
was kind of like Oh like that’s not
was kind of like Oh like that’s not supposed to happen like what what do I
supposed to happen like what what do I
supposed to happen like what what do I do now and I’d still remember the exact
do now and I’d still remember the exact
do now and I’d still remember the exact feeling because it wasn’t an illness or
feeling because it wasn’t an illness or
feeling because it wasn’t an illness or anything like that was a complete
anything like that was a complete
anything like that was a complete accident like nothing to do with him and
accident like nothing to do with him and
accident like nothing to do with him and just having so many questions at the
just having so many questions at the
just having so many questions at the time and also feeling like for the first
time and also feeling like for the first
time and also feeling like for the first time that life’s not really fair and
time that life’s not really fair and
time that life’s not really fair and like bad stuff does happen to good
like bad stuff does happen to good
like bad stuff does happen to good people which in my mind I couldn’t
people which in my mind I couldn’t
people which in my mind I couldn’t really fav on that before and it’s like
really fav on that before and it’s like
really fav on that before and it’s like this the worst reality check in in the
this the worst reality check in in the
this the worst reality check in in the world so how do these ideas of what
world so how do these ideas of what
world so how do these ideas of what London was going to be like and I had
London was going to be like and I had
London was going to be like and I had all these plans and then that kind of
all these plans and then that kind of
all these plans and then that kind of just got broken and my happy bubble
just got broken and my happy bubble
just got broken and my happy bubble completely fell down beneath me and I
completely fell down beneath me and I
completely fell down beneath me and I remember feeling like like I don’t know
remember feeling like like I don’t know
remember feeling like like I don’t know what to do and I pushed away everyone
what to do and I pushed away everyone
what to do and I pushed away everyone that was close to me and Bristol like my
that was close to me and Bristol like my
that was close to me and Bristol like my mum and my friends and everyone that
mum and my friends and everyone that
mum and my friends and everyone that really cared for me because I didn’t
really cared for me because I didn’t
really cared for me because I didn’t feel like I wanted to be around anyone
feel like I wanted to be around anyone
feel like I wanted to be around anyone that didn’t understand the pain that I
that didn’t understand the pain that I
that didn’t understand the pain that I was going for at that point but at the
was going for at that point but at the
was going for at that point but at the same time I was so young that my
same time I was so young that my
same time I was so young that my decisions weren’t always gonna be the
decisions weren’t always gonna be the
decisions weren’t always gonna be the best so I didn’t stay in Bristol I
best so I didn’t stay in Bristol I
best so I didn’t stay in Bristol I literally went straight to London the
literally went straight to London the
literally went straight to London the day that it happened and stayed with his
day that it happened and stayed with his
day that it happened and stayed with his family who were amazing and lovely and
family who were amazing and lovely and
family who were amazing and lovely and like looked after me and everything but
like looked after me and everything but
like looked after me and everything but I don’t know if it was the right thing
I don’t know if it was the right thing
I don’t know if it was the right thing to do but at the time I was just like I
to do but at the time I was just like I
to do but at the time I was just like I can’t I just want to be around people
can’t I just want to be around people
can’t I just want to be around people that reminded me of him and around like
that reminded me of him and around like
that reminded me of him and around like familiarity basically so did that at
familiarity basically so did that at
familiarity basically so did that at home everybody’s worried about me like
home everybody’s worried about me like
home everybody’s worried about me like my mom and my friends and everyone I
my mom and my friends and everyone I
my mom and my friends and everyone I kind of don’t want to see or speak to
kind of don’t want to see or speak to
kind of don’t want to see or speak to and I suppose the reason why I’m telling
and I suppose the reason why I’m telling
and I suppose the reason why I’m telling this now is because I don’t really have
this now is because I don’t really have
this now is because I don’t really have anyone to speak to around that time that
anyone to speak to around that time that
anyone to speak to around that time that had gone for anything similar and I
had gone for anything similar and I
had gone for anything similar and I didn’t really know what you were
didn’t really know what you were
didn’t really know what you were supposed to do and all the thoughts and
supposed to do and all the thoughts and
supposed to do and all the thoughts and the feelings that I was feeling were
the feelings that I was feeling were
the feelings that I was feeling were like oh my gosh I’m never gonna be loved
like oh my gosh I’m never gonna be loved
like oh my gosh I’m never gonna be loved again or oh my gosh I don’t even know if
again or oh my gosh I don’t even know if
again or oh my gosh I don’t even know if I can look at a boy again or how how am
I can look at a boy again or how how am
I can look at a boy again or how how am I gonna be and kind of feelin like this
I gonna be and kind of feelin like this
I gonna be and kind of feelin like this is the worst thing in the world that
is the worst thing in the world that
is the worst thing in the world that could ever happen to anyone
could ever happen to anyone
could ever happen to anyone literally that was how I felt and even
literally that was how I felt and even
literally that was how I felt and even at some points like I don’t really want
at some points like I don’t really want
at some points like I don’t really want to be here and if I disappeared then you
to be here and if I disappeared then you
to be here and if I disappeared then you know it would just be like that and
know it would just be like that and
know it would just be like that and that’s what happens in life and just
that’s what happens in life and just
that’s what happens in life and just really dark horrible thoughts for a
really dark horrible thoughts for a
really dark horrible thoughts for a sixteen-year-old to have but I didn’t
sixteen-year-old to have but I didn’t
sixteen-year-old to have but I didn’t allow anything else coming to come into
allow anything else coming to come into
allow anything else coming to come into my mind at that point
my mind at that point
my mind at that point luckily and I believed in God and I
luckily and I believed in God and I
luckily and I believed in God and I prayed for a lot of it and would kind of
prayed for a lot of it and would kind of
prayed for a lot of it and would kind of like have my own thoughts and pray every
like have my own thoughts and pray every
like have my own thoughts and pray every day and be like okay there’s something
day and be like okay there’s something
day and be like okay there’s something there’s it’s gonna pass like I believe
there’s it’s gonna pass like I believe
there’s it’s gonna pass like I believe in like no pain no matter how severe
in like no pain no matter how severe
in like no pain no matter how severe lasting forever like you could be going
lasting forever like you could be going
lasting forever like you could be going through the worst thing now but in a
through the worst thing now but in a
through the worst thing now but in a week or in a year or in lumps it’s never
week or in a year or in lumps it’s never
week or in a year or in lumps it’s never gonna be the exact same pain it’s always
gonna be the exact same pain it’s always
gonna be the exact same pain it’s always gonna like fade down a bit so anyway I
gonna like fade down a bit so anyway I
gonna like fade down a bit so anyway I had those thoughts in my mind this
had those thoughts in my mind this
had those thoughts in my mind this happened in July and I’m supposed to be
happened in July and I’m supposed to be
happened in July and I’m supposed to be starting college in September so the
starting college in September so the
starting college in September so the whole time I’m I’m grieving and I’m
whole time I’m I’m grieving and I’m
whole time I’m I’m grieving and I’m trying to deal with things in my own
trying to deal with things in my own
trying to deal with things in my own mind and I’m in this like horrible space
mind and I’m in this like horrible space
mind and I’m in this like horrible space but I’m knowing that in September I’m
but I’m knowing that in September I’m
but I’m knowing that in September I’m about to go to a school where I know
about to go to a school where I know
about to go to a school where I know nobody and I’ve got to be like this
nobody and I’ve got to be like this
nobody and I’ve got to be like this person that I’m used to be in that’s
person that I’m used to be in that’s
person that I’m used to be in that’s happy and like look at me and this is
happy and like look at me and this is
happy and like look at me and this is supposed to be my shot at like chasing
supposed to be my shot at like chasing
supposed to be my shot at like chasing my dream and everything despite this
my dream and everything despite this
my dream and everything despite this dark place I mean at that time so anyway
dark place I mean at that time so anyway
dark place I mean at that time so anyway it comes to September I’m starting to do
it comes to September I’m starting to do
it comes to September I’m starting to do a bit a bit better
a bit a bit better
a bit a bit better but obviously still in a bad place and
but obviously still in a bad place and
but obviously still in a bad place and I’ve gone to college and I just remember
I’ve gone to college and I just remember
I’ve gone to college and I just remember the first day coming into college
the first day coming into college
the first day coming into college feeling like this weight off my shoulder
feeling like this weight off my shoulder
feeling like this weight off my shoulder we’re just feeling kind of like light
we’re just feeling kind of like light
we’re just feeling kind of like light because no one there knew me no one had
because no one there knew me no one had
because no one there knew me no one had known what I’ve just been through it was
known what I’ve just been through it was
known what I’ve just been through it was a completely inflamed and it was just
a completely inflamed and it was just
a completely inflamed and it was just like well I can be this person and not
like well I can be this person and not
like well I can be this person and not not feel I don’t know kind of guilty for
not feel I don’t know kind of guilty for
not feel I don’t know kind of guilty for being happy and not feel like I’m not
being happy and not feel like I’m not
being happy and not feel like I’m not allowed to smile because a terrible
allowed to smile because a terrible
allowed to smile because a terrible thing has just happened so went to
thing has just happened so went to
thing has just happened so went to college I’ve moved in with the family
college I’ve moved in with the family
college I’ve moved in with the family member now that lives in London and I’m
member now that lives in London and I’m
member now that lives in London and I’m going to college I’m in this that
going to college I’m in this that
going to college I’m in this that of happiness while I’m there and they
of happiness while I’m there and they
of happiness while I’m there and they come in home and still feeling sad but
come in home and still feeling sad but
come in home and still feeling sad but things are slowly starting to get a
things are slowly starting to get a
things are slowly starting to get a little bit better and a bit easier to
little bit better and a bit easier to
little bit better and a bit easier to deal with and I’m starting to talk about
deal with and I’m starting to talk about
deal with and I’m starting to talk about things more and just like I think what I
things more and just like I think what I
things more and just like I think what I learnt in that period is that if you can
learnt in that period is that if you can
learnt in that period is that if you can kind of find something that takes you
kind of find something that takes you
kind of find something that takes you out of a sadness if you are feeling
out of a sadness if you are feeling
out of a sadness if you are feeling lower you are feeling down if you can
lower you are feeling down if you can
lower you are feeling down if you can find that one thing that makes you
find that one thing that makes you
find that one thing that makes you forget about that pain for even a day or
forget about that pain for even a day or
forget about that pain for even a day or an hour or whatever then do that as much
an hour or whatever then do that as much
an hour or whatever then do that as much as you can so that’s what I did I went
as you can so that’s what I did I went
as you can so that’s what I did I went to college I was out and then I’d come
to college I was out and then I’d come
to college I was out and then I’d come home and throughout a period of time I’m
home and throughout a period of time I’m
home and throughout a period of time I’m still I’m 17 at this point now in
still I’m 17 at this point now in
still I’m 17 at this point now in college and I’ve gone back to stay with
college and I’ve gone back to stay with
college and I’ve gone back to stay with my family member over the break but the
my family member over the break but the
my family member over the break but the family member that I’m living with is
family member that I’m living with is
family member that I’m living with is heavily involved in drugs so I’m living
heavily involved in drugs so I’m living
heavily involved in drugs so I’m living in this quite unsafe environment where
in this quite unsafe environment where
in this quite unsafe environment where there’s drugs being taken around me and
there’s drugs being taken around me and
there’s drugs being taken around me and I’m kind of coming home from college and
I’m kind of coming home from college and
I’m kind of coming home from college and just going straight to my bedroom and
just going straight to my bedroom and
just going straight to my bedroom and shutting the door and ignoring
shutting the door and ignoring
shutting the door and ignoring whatever’s going on outside of me and
whatever’s going on outside of me and
whatever’s going on outside of me and I’ve got like my mom and my other family
I’ve got like my mom and my other family
I’ve got like my mom and my other family members who are saying come home because
members who are saying come home because
members who are saying come home because you don’t need to be around that and
you don’t need to be around that and
you don’t need to be around that and everything but I knew that if I went
everything but I knew that if I went
everything but I knew that if I went back to Bristol I would just kind of
back to Bristol I would just kind of
back to Bristol I would just kind of fall into a trap of something that I
fall into a trap of something that I
fall into a trap of something that I didn’t want to do and being in London
didn’t want to do and being in London
didn’t want to do and being in London make me feel like I’m actually chasing
make me feel like I’m actually chasing
make me feel like I’m actually chasing my dream now and I’ve just started to
my dream now and I’ve just started to
my dream now and I’ve just started to move forward and I’ve just started to
move forward and I’ve just started to
move forward and I’ve just started to meet people that have the same
meet people that have the same
meet people that have the same aspirations of me as me and want to do
aspirations of me as me and want to do
aspirations of me as me and want to do the same things as me so I didn’t go
the same things as me so I didn’t go
the same things as me so I didn’t go back as much as they’d be persuaded me
back as much as they’d be persuaded me
back as much as they’d be persuaded me my mom would come down and say come back
my mom would come down and say come back
my mom would come down and say come back and I didn’t and it’s a good thing I
and I didn’t and it’s a good thing I
and I didn’t and it’s a good thing I didn’t because not long after that I met
didn’t because not long after that I met
didn’t because not long after that I met some people that work for this company
some people that work for this company
some people that work for this company called jump-off which was like this huge
called jump-off which was like this huge
called jump-off which was like this huge event in London which professor green
event in London which professor green
event in London which professor green was actually noticed from it but it’s
was actually noticed from it but it’s
was actually noticed from it but it’s like a battle event so they had like rap
like a battle event so they had like rap
like a battle event so they had like rap battles and dance battles and it was a
battles and dance battles and it was a
battles and dance battles and it was a live event but they also had a an office
live event but they also had a an office
live event but they also had a an office space where they had a YouTube channel
space where they had a YouTube channel
space where they had a YouTube channel and they would let me use the cameras
and they would let me use the cameras
and they would let me use the cameras there and they taught me how to edit and
there and they taught me how to edit and
there and they taught me how to edit and they taught me basically how to be a
they taught me basically how to be a
they taught me basically how to be a presenter like they would I come there
presenter like they would I come there
presenter like they would I come there after college and state or like 10
after college and state or like 10
after college and state or like 10 o’clock at night and just be like eager
o’clock at night and just be like eager
o’clock at night and just be like eager to learn everything like even if I was
to learn everything like even if I was
to learn everything like even if I was making teas or just sitting there
making teas or just sitting there
making teas or just sitting there listening to conversations I was just on
listening to conversations I was just on
listening to conversations I was just on them like teach me teach me and that was
them like teach me teach me and that was
them like teach me teach me and that was where I started feeling like it’s
where I started feeling like it’s
where I started feeling like it’s actually happening even though I wasn’t
actually happening even though I wasn’t
actually happening even though I wasn’t getting paid I wasn’t even doing
getting paid I wasn’t even doing
getting paid I wasn’t even doing anything I was
anything I was
anything I was in a space that I imagined myself being
in a space that I imagined myself being
in a space that I imagined myself being in so I was there I made my first
in so I was there I made my first
in so I was there I made my first youtube video there had just literally
youtube video there had just literally
youtube video there had just literally with them letting me take their camera
with them letting me take their camera
with them letting me take their camera upstairs and like that kind of remember
upstairs and like that kind of remember
upstairs and like that kind of remember I did want to play it but it’ll probably
I did want to play it but it’ll probably
I did want to play it but it’ll probably go on for ages it was just me sat in
go on for ages it was just me sat in
go on for ages it was just me sat in front of the camera like doing a speedy
front of the camera like doing a speedy
front of the camera like doing a speedy makeup tutorials so it was like a joke
makeup tutorials so it was like a joke
makeup tutorials so it was like a joke version of like the makeup tutorials you
version of like the makeup tutorials you
version of like the makeup tutorials you see nowadays but back then no one was
see nowadays but back then no one was
see nowadays but back then no one was really getting paid for YouTube or
really getting paid for YouTube or
really getting paid for YouTube or anything so I was just doing it for fun
anything so I was just doing it for fun
anything so I was just doing it for fun and then I’m gonna kind of rush the
and then I’m gonna kind of rush the
and then I’m gonna kind of rush the story I’ll probably write a book one day
story I’ll probably write a book one day
story I’ll probably write a book one day but yeah I carried on doing this and
but yeah I carried on doing this and
but yeah I carried on doing this and yeah so I got my first job there and I
yeah so I got my first job there and I
yeah so I got my first job there and I was working working at Urban Outfitters
was working working at Urban Outfitters
was working working at Urban Outfitters as well at the same time because I had
as well at the same time because I had
as well at the same time because I had literally no money I used to do this
literally no money I used to do this
literally no money I used to do this trick where I’d pretend I’d lost my
trick where I’d pretend I’d lost my
trick where I’d pretend I’d lost my oyster because I didn’t have money for
oyster because I didn’t have money for
oyster because I didn’t have money for oysters to get on the trains so I’d go
oysters to get on the trains so I’d go
oysters to get on the trains so I’d go through and luckily I’ve just lost my um
through and luckily I’ve just lost my um
through and luckily I’ve just lost my um my oyster card can you let me throw any
my oyster card can you let me throw any
my oyster card can you let me throw any to get to college and they do it and I
to get to college and they do it and I
to get to college and they do it and I did that one literally like every train
did that one literally like every train
did that one literally like every train station around my area until they
station around my area until they
station around my area until they realized like this girl’s having a laugh
realized like this girl’s having a laugh
realized like this girl’s having a laugh so did that work in an urban outfitters
so did that work in an urban outfitters
so did that work in an urban outfitters going to jump up every day and during
going to jump up every day and during
going to jump up every day and during college for like literally about eight
college for like literally about eight
college for like literally about eight months nine months until I decided to
months nine months until I decided to
months nine months until I decided to leave college because jump off was
leave college because jump off was
leave college because jump off was starting to pay me and I felt like this
starting to pay me and I felt like this
starting to pay me and I felt like this is I don’t even know if it was the wrong
is I don’t even know if it was the wrong
is I don’t even know if it was the wrong it was the right thing to do but at that
it was the right thing to do but at that
it was the right thing to do but at that time in my mind I was like I’m I’m
time in my mind I was like I’m I’m
time in my mind I was like I’m I’m basically getting trained in the job
basically getting trained in the job
basically getting trained in the job that I want to do instead of being in
that I want to do instead of being in
that I want to do instead of being in college learning how to be in a job I’m
college learning how to be in a job I’m
college learning how to be in a job I’m doing it firsthand
doing it firsthand
doing it firsthand so left college stayed at jump-off and
so left college stayed at jump-off and
so left college stayed at jump-off and not long after that and got a screen
not long after that and got a screen
not long after that and got a screen test which is like a presenters version
test which is like a presenters version
test which is like a presenters version of an audition for copper 90 so do a
of an audition for copper 90 so do a
of an audition for copper 90 so do a series with them and they’re now the
series with them and they’re now the
series with them and they’re now the biggest football channel in Europe but
biggest football channel in Europe but
biggest football channel in Europe but they needed a co-presenter and I went
they needed a co-presenter and I went
they needed a co-presenter and I went down and I had no experience other than
down and I had no experience other than
down and I had no experience other than what jumpluff had trained me and I got
what jumpluff had trained me and I got
what jumpluff had trained me and I got the job and he did a series with them
the job and he did a series with them
the job and he did a series with them good football virgin you can find it
good football virgin you can find it
good football virgin you can find it online as hilarious but yeah did that
online as hilarious but yeah did that
online as hilarious but yeah did that and from that led on to them taking me
and from that led on to them taking me
and from that led on to them taking me to Brazil for two months and I filmed a
to Brazil for two months and I filmed a
to Brazil for two months and I filmed a show with high end I around the World
show with high end I around the World
show with high end I around the World Cup so it was basically like we did a
Cup so it was basically like we did a
Cup so it was basically like we did a tour of the 12 cities in Brazil and then
tour of the 12 cities in Brazil and then
tour of the 12 cities in Brazil and then I did like a whole show during the World
I did like a whole show during the World
I did like a whole show during the World Cup and everything like that so then
Cup and everything like that so then
Cup and everything like that so then that job came and it was
that job came and it was
that job came and it was like a spiral effect after that of every
like a spiral effect after that of every
like a spiral effect after that of every job every job but I’m still living at my
job every job but I’m still living at my
job every job but I’m still living at my at my family members house which was a
at my family members house which was a
at my family members house which was a horrible environment to be in my food
horrible environment to be in my food
horrible environment to be in my food was getting stolen out the fridge my
was getting stolen out the fridge my
was getting stolen out the fridge my phone was getting stolen and like I just
phone was getting stolen and like I just
phone was getting stolen and like I just it just wasn’t safe I couldn’t afford to
it just wasn’t safe I couldn’t afford to
it just wasn’t safe I couldn’t afford to move out because I hadn’t yeah I hadn’t
move out because I hadn’t yeah I hadn’t
move out because I hadn’t yeah I hadn’t got enough money about that point so
got enough money about that point so
got enough money about that point so I’ve come back from Brazil a camera’s
I’ve come back from Brazil a camera’s
I’ve come back from Brazil a camera’s gone missing from my room I think this
gone missing from my room I think this
gone missing from my room I think this was like the point where I was like okay
was like the point where I was like okay
was like the point where I was like okay I need to leave and I had a friend
I need to leave and I had a friend
I need to leave and I had a friend called penny who literally like scooped
called penny who literally like scooped
called penny who literally like scooped me under her wing and she let me pay her
me under her wing and she let me pay her
me under her wing and she let me pay her cheap rent to stay with her and the
cheap rent to stay with her and the
cheap rent to stay with her and the reason why I mention her is because I
reason why I mention her is because I
reason why I mention her is because I feel like it’s so important when you are
feel like it’s so important when you are
feel like it’s so important when you are going through stuff to have a friend or
going through stuff to have a friend or
going through stuff to have a friend or just somebody around you that completely
just somebody around you that completely
just somebody around you that completely lifts you up and fills you with
lifts you up and fills you with
lifts you up and fills you with positivity and I was still like just
positivity and I was still like just
positivity and I was still like just turned 18 at this point so she was like
turned 18 at this point so she was like
turned 18 at this point so she was like this angel that came into my life and
this angel that came into my life and
this angel that came into my life and whenever I had doubts she was the one
whenever I had doubts she was the one
whenever I had doubts she was the one that lifted me up and whenever I felt
that lifted me up and whenever I felt
that lifted me up and whenever I felt lower she would fill me with all this
lower she would fill me with all this
lower she would fill me with all this positive energy and basically saved my
positive energy and basically saved my
positive energy and basically saved my state of mind around that time when
state of mind around that time when
state of mind around that time when everything had gone well but I’m running
everything had gone well but I’m running
everything had gone well but I’m running out of time so I’m just gonna skip
out of time so I’m just gonna skip
out of time so I’m just gonna skip forward completely to now I’m obviously
forward completely to now I’m obviously
forward completely to now I’m obviously 22 years old I’ve worked for MTV and all
22 years old I’ve worked for MTV and all
22 years old I’ve worked for MTV and all these places I live on my own now I have
these places I live on my own now I have
these places I live on my own now I have a flair and I yeah I feel so lucky that
a flair and I yeah I feel so lucky that
a flair and I yeah I feel so lucky that I didn’t go back home and I didn’t
I didn’t go back home and I didn’t
I didn’t go back home and I didn’t crumble under pressure and I didn’t let
crumble under pressure and I didn’t let
crumble under pressure and I didn’t let the situations that I feel like
the situations that I feel like
the situations that I feel like understandably a lot of other people in
understandably a lot of other people in
understandably a lot of other people in would want to not do anything and want
would want to not do anything and want
would want to not do anything and want to just stay inside and want to just
to just stay inside and want to just
to just stay inside and want to just quit everything they’re doing because
quit everything they’re doing because
quit everything they’re doing because it’s disheartening and it’s it’s a
it’s disheartening and it’s it’s a
it’s disheartening and it’s it’s a strange state of mind to be and but my
strange state of mind to be and but my
strange state of mind to be and but my message for me sharing this story is
message for me sharing this story is
message for me sharing this story is just that as hard as things get as I
just that as hard as things get as I
just that as hard as things get as I said at the beginning
said at the beginning
said at the beginning don’t let that control you always keep
don’t let that control you always keep
don’t let that control you always keep in mind the vision that you had at the
in mind the vision that you had at the
in mind the vision that you had at the beginning regardless of the
beginning regardless of the
beginning regardless of the circumstances regardless of the
circumstances regardless of the
circumstances regardless of the situation’s there’s a quote that I
situation’s there’s a quote that I
situation’s there’s a quote that I always say that’s like everything will
always say that’s like everything will
always say that’s like everything will be okay in the end and if it’s not okay
be okay in the end and if it’s not okay
be okay in the end and if it’s not okay it’s not the end and I really believe
it’s not the end and I really believe
it’s not the end and I really believe that’s true because hello like I am here
that’s true because hello like I am here
that’s true because hello like I am here and I only want to like spread the
and I only want to like spread the
and I only want to like spread the message of positivity through everyone
message of positivity through everyone
message of positivity through everyone and that was one thing that I kept in my
and that was one thing that I kept in my
and that was one thing that I kept in my mind throughout I’d never lost faith I
mind throughout I’d never lost faith I
mind throughout I’d never lost faith I never lost hope that you can achieve
never lost hope that you can achieve
never lost hope that you can achieve your goals even though things are bad
your goals even though things are bad
your goals even though things are bad and even though things aren’t going your
and even though things aren’t going your
and even though things aren’t going your way
way
way and yeah stay true to your heart thank
and yeah stay true to your heart thank
and yeah stay true to your heart thank you
you
you [Applause]
”
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