I was never sure whether it was a good idea to ask a girl out walk around like
idea to ask a girl out walk around like
idea to ask a girl out walk around like I go on to the pen my poor friend and
I go on to the pen my poor friend and
I go on to the pen my poor friend and I’d see can I really communicate this
I’d see can I really communicate this
I’d see can I really communicate this idea to them I’d say things like hey
idea to them I’d say things like hey
idea to them I’d say things like hey we’re going hours and you’ll join us for
we’re going hours and you’ll join us for
we’re going hours and you’ll join us for a milkshake and I’d kind of make sure
a milkshake and I’d kind of make sure
a milkshake and I’d kind of make sure that I can communicate it after that I’d
that I can communicate it after that I’d
that I can communicate it after that I’d move on and I kind of get that that
move on and I kind of get that that
move on and I kind of get that that initial feedback from kind of the dating
initial feedback from kind of the dating
initial feedback from kind of the dating expert of my school this was the guy who
expert of my school this was the guy who
expert of my school this was the guy who of all of us really understood women if
of all of us really understood women if
of all of us really understood women if there is such a thing
there is such a thing
there is such a thing after I got his feedback I found out
after I got his feedback I found out
after I got his feedback I found out that pretty much naturally everybody at
that pretty much naturally everybody at
that pretty much naturally everybody at my school knew that I was into this girl
my school knew that I was into this girl
my school knew that I was into this girl my friends had told their friends and
my friends had told their friends and
my friends had told their friends and their friends had told friends of
their friends had told friends of
their friends had told friends of friends and everybody was giving their
friends and everybody was giving their
friends and everybody was giving their feedback on kind of my love interest and
feedback on kind of my love interest and
feedback on kind of my love interest and so it’s funny but by the time when it
so it’s funny but by the time when it
so it’s funny but by the time when it was time to actually ask her out I had
was time to actually ask her out I had
was time to actually ask her out I had already gotten all of this information
already gotten all of this information
already gotten all of this information and so I knew that it was a good idea I
and so I knew that it was a good idea I
and so I knew that it was a good idea I knew that it made sense for me to ask
knew that it made sense for me to ask
knew that it made sense for me to ask her out but I couldn’t just walk up to
her out but I couldn’t just walk up to
her out but I couldn’t just walk up to her and say hey you and me we’re gonna
her and say hey you and me we’re gonna
her and say hey you and me we’re gonna hold hands in the cafeteria make
hold hands in the cafeteria make
hold hands in the cafeteria make smooches you know all that good stuff
smooches you know all that good stuff
smooches you know all that good stuff it’s a bit much
it’s a bit much
it’s a bit much so I let’s say that I noticed that
so I let’s say that I noticed that
so I let’s say that I noticed that there’s a dance coming up I walk up to
there’s a dance coming up I walk up to
there’s a dance coming up I walk up to her and I say hey how about we just go
her and I say hey how about we just go
her and I say hey how about we just go to this dance just this simple thing a
to this dance just this simple thing a
to this dance just this simple thing a little test and if she says yes well
little test and if she says yes well
little test and if she says yes well then it’s time for me to really go all
then it’s time for me to really go all
then it’s time for me to really go all out I know that it’s a good idea that we
out I know that it’s a good idea that we
out I know that it’s a good idea that we go out my friends know that it’s a good
go out my friends know that it’s a good
go out my friends know that it’s a good idea here her friends know that it’s a
idea here her friends know that it’s a
idea here her friends know that it’s a good idea she says yes I’m gonna spend
good idea she says yes I’m gonna spend
good idea she says yes I’m gonna spend not only the dance getting to know her
not only the dance getting to know her
not only the dance getting to know her but the two weeks before going on dates
but the two weeks before going on dates
but the two weeks before going on dates really trying to understand her cuz in
really trying to understand her cuz in
really trying to understand her cuz in dating just like in anything if it’s
dating just like in anything if it’s
dating just like in anything if it’s ever going to succeed
ever going to succeed
ever going to succeed you really have to put a lot of effort
you really have to put a lot of effort
you really have to put a lot of effort into it so that was kind of my my dating
into it so that was kind of my my dating
into it so that was kind of my my dating life in high school and as you’ll notice
life in high school and as you’ll notice
life in high school and as you’ll notice it kind of goes through something of a
it kind of goes through something of a
it kind of goes through something of a process of natural selection where at
process of natural selection where at
process of natural selection where at each step some of the ideas could die so
this kind of brings me to the topic of
this kind of brings me to the topic of natural selection of ideas so I kind of
natural selection of ideas so I kind of
natural selection of ideas so I kind of noticed the idea of natural selection
noticed the idea of natural selection
noticed the idea of natural selection ideas when I was at a monastery in
ideas when I was at a monastery in
ideas when I was at a monastery in Thailand the Buddhists have a lot of
Thailand the Buddhists have a lot of
Thailand the Buddhists have a lot of philosophy about how you relate to your
philosophy about how you relate to your
philosophy about how you relate to your thoughts how you relate to your ideas
thoughts how you relate to your ideas
thoughts how you relate to your ideas that you can choose which ones to accept
that you can choose which ones to accept
that you can choose which ones to accept and which ones to let go so I realized
and which ones to let go so I realized
and which ones to let go so I realized that I really wanted an objective
that I really wanted an objective
that I really wanted an objective framework for being able to determine
framework for being able to determine
framework for being able to determine which one’s I wanted to follow and which
which one’s I wanted to follow and which
which one’s I wanted to follow and which ones I wanted to dismiss cuz back in
ones I wanted to dismiss cuz back in
ones I wanted to dismiss cuz back in high school I had all of these different
high school I had all of these different
high school I had all of these different ideas these were ideas like you know
ideas these were ideas like you know
ideas these were ideas like you know should I join this club or that Club
should I join this club or that Club
should I join this club or that Club should I even apply to college should I
should I even apply to college should I
should I even apply to college should I go to college when I want to go to
go to college when I want to go to
go to college when I want to go to college what should i major in and over
college what should i major in and over
college what should i major in and over time I found that these ideas only
time I found that these ideas only
time I found that these ideas only increased in intensity and difficulty
increased in intensity and difficulty
increased in intensity and difficulty and so it was really tough to be honest
and so it was really tough to be honest
and so it was really tough to be honest I was really afraid I was making a lot
I was really afraid I was making a lot
I was really afraid I was making a lot of big life decisions and it was really
of big life decisions and it was really
of big life decisions and it was really scary so now that I’m an adult I find it
scary so now that I’m an adult I find it
scary so now that I’m an adult I find it really valuable to have a way to
really valuable to have a way to
really valuable to have a way to determine kind of objectively which of
determine kind of objectively which of
determine kind of objectively which of my ideas are good ideas
my ideas are good ideas
my ideas are good ideas and I touched on it naturally with the
and I touched on it naturally with the
and I touched on it naturally with the dating example but here let me walk you
dating example but here let me walk you
dating example but here let me walk you through it now so the first step is kind
through it now so the first step is kind
through it now so the first step is kind of that inner circle and we saw this
of that inner circle and we saw this
of that inner circle and we saw this with dating the real question that I
with dating the real question that I
with dating the real question that I find with my framework is you know at
find with my framework is you know at
find with my framework is you know at the first step doesn’t even sound good
the first step doesn’t even sound good
the first step doesn’t even sound good to me because I have ideas all the time
to me because I have ideas all the time
to me because I have ideas all the time we all do and so that first step is to
we all do and so that first step is to
we all do and so that first step is to talk to people and say hey does this
talk to people and say hey does this
talk to people and say hey does this idea make sense when I say it aloud I
idea make sense when I say it aloud I
idea make sense when I say it aloud I find it really valuable to have a core
find it really valuable to have a core
find it really valuable to have a core group of four or five friends who I can
group of four or five friends who I can
group of four or five friends who I can be silly around who I can say ideas and
be silly around who I can say ideas and
be silly around who I can say ideas and not feel like I’m going to be judged so
not feel like I’m going to be judged so
not feel like I’m going to be judged so I can say ideas that will be crazy
I can say ideas that will be crazy
I can say ideas that will be crazy or offensive or who knows what because
or offensive or who knows what because
or offensive or who knows what because sometimes when you give an idea
sometimes when you give an idea
sometimes when you give an idea structure when you really say it you
structure when you really say it you
structure when you really say it you find out whether it even make sense to
find out whether it even make sense to
find out whether it even make sense to you so that’s the step that I call my
you so that’s the step that I call my
you so that’s the step that I call my inner circle and after an idea passes my
inner circle and after an idea passes my
inner circle and after an idea passes my inner circle if it does I move on and I
inner circle if it does I move on and I
inner circle if it does I move on and I start communicating that idea to a wider
start communicating that idea to a wider
start communicating that idea to a wider group of friends and the goal of this
group of friends and the goal of this
group of friends and the goal of this step is to make sure that I can clearly
step is to make sure that I can clearly
step is to make sure that I can clearly communicate it because later I’m gonna
communicate it because later I’m gonna
communicate it because later I’m gonna want to be getting information on that
want to be getting information on that
want to be getting information on that feedback on my idea and it’s important
feedback on my idea and it’s important
feedback on my idea and it’s important that I’m getting that feedback on the
that I’m getting that feedback on the
that I’m getting that feedback on the idea itself not on things that are say
idea itself not on things that are say
idea itself not on things that are say tangentially related to the idea or
tangentially related to the idea or
tangentially related to the idea or little rabbit holes that aren’t really
little rabbit holes that aren’t really
little rabbit holes that aren’t really core parts so that second step is to
core parts so that second step is to
core parts so that second step is to really pitch it a lot and make sure that
really pitch it a lot and make sure that
really pitch it a lot and make sure that I can communicate the essence of my idea
after I can clearly communicate an idea
after I can clearly communicate an idea I’m now able to get feedback on it and
I’m now able to get feedback on it and
I’m now able to get feedback on it and that feedback that initial feedback I
that feedback that initial feedback I
that feedback that initial feedback I like to get from about ten people who
like to get from about ten people who
like to get from about ten people who are really experts at giving feedback
are really experts at giving feedback
are really experts at giving feedback these don’t even have to be good friends
these don’t even have to be good friends
these don’t even have to be good friends these are just people who I would trust
these are just people who I would trust
these are just people who I would trust their feedback for example in the dating
their feedback for example in the dating
their feedback for example in the dating world this would be my friend who seems
world this would be my friend who seems
world this would be my friend who seems really good with women after that
really good with women after that
really good with women after that initial feedback it’s time to get some
initial feedback it’s time to get some
initial feedback it’s time to get some broad feedback and this naturally
broad feedback and this naturally
broad feedback and this naturally happens in high school dating for me at
happens in high school dating for me at
happens in high school dating for me at least with kind of where everybody knows
least with kind of where everybody knows
least with kind of where everybody knows and everybody’s giving their own input
and everybody’s giving their own input
and everybody’s giving their own input but for other ideas
but for other ideas
but for other ideas I find it valuable too once I know that
I find it valuable too once I know that
I find it valuable too once I know that the idea seems reasonable from that
the idea seems reasonable from that
the idea seems reasonable from that initial feedback to see as many people
initial feedback to see as many people
initial feedback to see as many people as possible this would be pitching the
as possible this would be pitching the
as possible this would be pitching the idea to over drivers when somebody asks
idea to over drivers when somebody asks
idea to over drivers when somebody asks me what I do for a living telling them
me what I do for a living telling them
me what I do for a living telling them hey I have this idea what do you think
hey I have this idea what do you think
hey I have this idea what do you think of this idea and when you get broad
of this idea and when you get broad
of this idea and when you get broad feedback on an idea you can learn not
feedback on an idea you can learn not
feedback on an idea you can learn not only what about it seems reasonable but
only what about it seems reasonable but
only what about it seems reasonable but also who likes that idea so I call that
also who likes that idea so I call that
also who likes that idea so I call that next step getting broad feedback after
next step getting broad feedback after
next step getting broad feedback after I’ve gotten broad feedback on the idea I
I’ve gotten broad feedback on the idea I
I’ve gotten broad feedback on the idea I want to make a prototype of it some
want to make a prototype of it some
want to make a prototype of it some initial first step to really make sure
initial first step to really make sure
initial first step to really make sure that when you have the idea and you say
that when you have the idea and you say
that when you have the idea and you say out in the wild a little bit it still
out in the wild a little bit it still
out in the wild a little bit it still works this could be for example say
works this could be for example say
works this could be for example say writing a blog post on a topic or
writing a blog post on a topic or
writing a blog post on a topic or walking around high school and seeing
walking around high school and seeing
walking around high school and seeing how many people will sign up for the
how many people will sign up for the
how many people will sign up for the club that you’re thinking of starting or
club that you’re thinking of starting or
club that you’re thinking of starting or doing a TEDx on a topic before you
doing a TEDx on a topic before you
doing a TEDx on a topic before you consider writing about it in a book and
consider writing about it in a book and
consider writing about it in a book and after that initial prototype if my idea
after that initial prototype if my idea
after that initial prototype if my idea has been able to pass through all of
has been able to pass through all of
has been able to pass through all of these steps and succeed I know it’s a
these steps and succeed I know it’s a
these steps and succeed I know it’s a good idea and so it’s really time to
good idea and so it’s really time to
good idea and so it’s really time to commit and committing is really
commit and committing is really
commit and committing is really important because at some point you have
important because at some point you have
important because at some point you have to draw on the line and a line in the
to draw on the line and a line in the
to draw on the line and a line in the sand and say I’m going to do this I’m
sand and say I’m going to do this I’m
sand and say I’m going to do this I’m gonna put the effort into it and I am
gonna put the effort into it and I am
gonna put the effort into it and I am going to see this thing through to
going to see this thing through to
going to see this thing through to completion because doing things is tough
completion because doing things is tough
completion because doing things is tough and often an idea will fail many times
and often an idea will fail many times
and often an idea will fail many times before it succeeds or often you’ll have
before it succeeds or often you’ll have
before it succeeds or often you’ll have unforeseen difficulties and so you
unforeseen difficulties and so you
unforeseen difficulties and so you really need to know before you commit to
really need to know before you commit to
really need to know before you commit to an idea before you put a lot of time and
an idea before you put a lot of time and
an idea before you put a lot of time and effort into it that it’s the right one
effort into it that it’s the right one
effort into it that it’s the right one to be committing to but when you do you
to be committing to but when you do you
to be committing to but when you do you got to go all out with it so this is the
got to go all out with it so this is the
got to go all out with it so this is the framework I call natural selection of
framework I call natural selection of
framework I call natural selection of ideas and you saw how it naturally kind
ideas and you saw how it naturally kind
ideas and you saw how it naturally kind of worked in high school dating but it
of worked in high school dating but it
of worked in high school dating but it works in other areas as well for example
works in other areas as well for example
works in other areas as well for example when I graduated college last year I
when I graduated college last year I
when I graduated college last year I knew I wanted to write a book but I had
knew I wanted to write a book but I had
knew I wanted to write a book but I had 30 40 50 ideas for what topic to write
30 40 50 ideas for what topic to write
30 40 50 ideas for what topic to write on so I ran them through this process at
on so I ran them through this process at
on so I ran them through this process at first I was talking my ideas out with
first I was talking my ideas out with
first I was talking my ideas out with friends just to see what they sounded
friends just to see what they sounded
friends just to see what they sounded like to me if they sounded reasonable
like to me if they sounded reasonable
like to me if they sounded reasonable then I moved on and I made sure that I
then I moved on and I made sure that I
then I moved on and I made sure that I could clearly communicate those ideas so
could clearly communicate those ideas so
could clearly communicate those ideas so that when I later got feedback from my
that when I later got feedback from my
that when I later got feedback from my friends a lot of literary friends at
friends a lot of literary friends at
friends a lot of literary friends at first I was able to make sure that I was
first I was able to make sure that I was
first I was able to make sure that I was getting that feedback on the idea itself
getting that feedback on the idea itself
getting that feedback on the idea itself my literary friends kind of the experts
my literary friends kind of the experts
my literary friends kind of the experts in the book world that I know we’re
in the book world that I know we’re
in the book world that I know we’re really helpful for that initial feedback
really helpful for that initial feedback
really helpful for that initial feedback because I was able to find out what they
because I was able to find out what they
because I was able to find out what they liked about it so that then when I got
liked about it so that then when I got
liked about it so that then when I got broad feedback you would have caught me
broad feedback you would have caught me
broad feedback you would have caught me pitching the idea when I was waiting in
pitching the idea when I was waiting in
pitching the idea when I was waiting in line for a concert or whenever an uber
line for a concert or whenever an uber
line for a concert or whenever an uber driver starts up a conversation with me
driver starts up a conversation with me
driver starts up a conversation with me I only had about three ideas that got
I only had about three ideas that got
I only had about three ideas that got past all of those steps and ended up
past all of those steps and ended up
past all of those steps and ended up going to a prototype but when I did make
going to a prototype but when I did make
going to a prototype but when I did make that outline and I started chopping it
that outline and I started chopping it
that outline and I started chopping it around I found that it was incredibly
around I found that it was incredibly
around I found that it was incredibly valuable I was able to get a lot of
valuable I was able to get a lot of
valuable I was able to get a lot of incredible feedback on that prototype
incredible feedback on that prototype
incredible feedback on that prototype and know who likes what about it so that
and know who likes what about it so that
and know who likes what about it so that then when I spent a year of my life
then when I spent a year of my life
then when I spent a year of my life writing a book I was pretty confident
writing a book I was pretty confident
writing a book I was pretty confident and I knew what people liked and what
and I knew what people liked and what
and I knew what people liked and what people wouldn’t like so there’s a lot of
people wouldn’t like so there’s a lot of
people wouldn’t like so there’s a lot of value to going through this kind of
value to going through this kind of
value to going through this kind of objective process and part of that value
objective process and part of that value
objective process and part of that value is because we see pretty often the
is because we see pretty often the
is because we see pretty often the danger of people skipping some of these
danger of people skipping some of these
danger of people skipping some of these steps for example in the creative world
steps for example in the creative world
steps for example in the creative world you see a lot of people who come up with
you see a lot of people who come up with
you see a lot of people who come up with an idea and then they share their idea
an idea and then they share their idea
an idea and then they share their idea with friends maybe kick around it a
with friends maybe kick around it a
with friends maybe kick around it a little bit but then they jump all the
little bit but then they jump all the
little bit but then they jump all the way to the end and they try to write the
way to the end and they try to write the
way to the end and they try to write the entire screenplay only to realize that
entire screenplay only to realize that
entire screenplay only to realize that the audience isn’t as big as they
the audience isn’t as big as they
the audience isn’t as big as they thought it was or for example the idea
thought it was or for example the idea
thought it was or for example the idea is only one that they and their friends
is only one that they and their friends
is only one that they and their friends actually ended up caring about on the
actually ended up caring about on the
actually ended up caring about on the other hand I’ve shared my book with
other hand I’ve shared my book with
other hand I’ve shared my book with about the first two chapters with about
about the first two chapters with about
about the first two chapters with about 50 people and I already know what people
50 people and I already know what people
50 people and I already know what people like about it and what people don’t like
like about it and what people don’t like
like about it and what people don’t like about it I already know what my target
about it I already know what my target
about it I already know what my target audience is I haven’t even gone into the
audience is I haven’t even gone into the
audience is I haven’t even gone into the publishing world yet but I’m gonna be
publishing world yet but I’m gonna be
publishing world yet but I’m gonna be able to talk to publishers and say hey I
able to talk to publishers and say hey I
able to talk to publishers and say hey I already have this data he’ll if I want
already have this data he’ll if I want
already have this data he’ll if I want to I can even just go self publish
to I can even just go self publish
to I can even just go self publish because I know the number of people and
because I know the number of people and
because I know the number of people and the demographics and all of the areas
the demographics and all of the areas
the demographics and all of the areas that people already like about it by
that people already like about it by
that people already like about it by going through kind of an objective
going through kind of an objective
going through kind of an objective system I’m able to build to that success
system I’m able to build to that success
system I’m able to build to that success so this is my system I call it natural
so this is my system I call it natural
so this is my system I call it natural selection of ideas and I like it you’re
selection of ideas and I like it you’re
selection of ideas and I like it you’re welcome to use it too if you’re
welcome to use it too if you’re
welcome to use it too if you’re interested in it maybe try it out but
interested in it maybe try it out but
interested in it maybe try it out but the key if there’s a single key of this
the key if there’s a single key of this
the key if there’s a single key of this talk is not necessarily using my system
talk is not necessarily using my system
talk is not necessarily using my system but having a system having an objective
but having a system having an objective
but having a system having an objective way to test your ideas in order to see
way to test your ideas in order to see
way to test your ideas in order to see which ones end up working and which ones
which ones end up working and which ones
which ones end up working and which ones don’t because we’re constantly being
don’t because we’re constantly being
don’t because we’re constantly being demanded with
demanded with
demanded with ways in order to spend our time and
ways in order to spend our time and
ways in order to spend our time and spend our energy and if you don’t have a
spend our energy and if you don’t have a
spend our energy and if you don’t have a system you’re just gonna end up being
system you’re just gonna end up being
system you’re just gonna end up being buffeted around by ideas from day to day
buffeted around by ideas from day to day
buffeted around by ideas from day to day I remember back in high school I was
I remember back in high school I was
I remember back in high school I was deeply deeply passionately in love
deeply deeply passionately in love
deeply deeply passionately in love writing her name on my notebooks in love
writing her name on my notebooks in love
writing her name on my notebooks in love for about a day and then the next day I
for about a day and then the next day I
for about a day and then the next day I realized that wait that wasn’t actually
realized that wait that wasn’t actually
realized that wait that wasn’t actually a great idea so if you have an objective
a great idea so if you have an objective
a great idea so if you have an objective system then you’re able to measure which
system then you’re able to measure which
system then you’re able to measure which of your ideas succeed in which fail you
of your ideas succeed in which fail you
of your ideas succeed in which fail you can keep track and you can have a
can keep track and you can have a
can keep track and you can have a success rate that is consistent and as
success rate that is consistent and as
success rate that is consistent and as we saw with dating which as we all know
we saw with dating which as we all know
we saw with dating which as we all know is the most important aspect of a life
is the most important aspect of a life
is the most important aspect of a life if you have an objective system and you
if you have an objective system and you
if you have an objective system and you use the steps consistently you can take
use the steps consistently you can take
use the steps consistently you can take the luck out of getting lucky thank you
”
Be First to Comment