I’m here to share with you today how I found out that I am actually a superhero
found out that I am actually a superhero
found out that I am actually a superhero I know right I was surprised too I mean
I know right I was surprised too I mean
I know right I was surprised too I mean it’s not like I can leap tall buildings
it’s not like I can leap tall buildings
it’s not like I can leap tall buildings at a single down like Superman but I am
at a single down like Superman but I am
at a single down like Superman but I am a super mom and I believe that there’s a
a super mom and I believe that there’s a
a super mom and I believe that there’s a lot more super moms out there they just
lot more super moms out there they just
lot more super moms out there they just haven’t found their super powers yet but
haven’t found their super powers yet but
haven’t found their super powers yet but all superheroes have a backstory I love
all superheroes have a backstory I love
all superheroes have a backstory I love baking so when I had kids I couldn’t
baking so when I had kids I couldn’t
baking so when I had kids I couldn’t wait to teach them how to whip up sweet
wait to teach them how to whip up sweet
wait to teach them how to whip up sweet treats in the kitchen now admittedly
treats in the kitchen now admittedly
treats in the kitchen now admittedly baking with my two sons can get a little
baking with my two sons can get a little
baking with my two sons can get a little bit chaotic and messy their attention
bit chaotic and messy their attention
bit chaotic and messy their attention spans or as short as their legs and they
spans or as short as their legs and they
spans or as short as their legs and they believe the sprinkles belong on
believe the sprinkles belong on
believe the sprinkles belong on everything last year we decided to make
everything last year we decided to make
everything last year we decided to make these cute little reindeer cookies off
these cute little reindeer cookies off
these cute little reindeer cookies off of Pinterest this is what are turning
you don’t have now the sad thing is I
you don’t have now the sad thing is I held a lot of pride and was elated with
held a lot of pride and was elated with
held a lot of pride and was elated with our homemade quirky looking cookies
our homemade quirky looking cookies
our homemade quirky looking cookies until I decided I needed to compare our
until I decided I needed to compare our
until I decided I needed to compare our cookies to the ones on social media
cookies to the ones on social media
cookies to the ones on social media where I decided they were mediocre at
where I decided they were mediocre at
where I decided they were mediocre at best to downright ugly Edwards an entire
best to downright ugly Edwards an entire
best to downright ugly Edwards an entire afternoons joy of baking with my two
afternoons joy of baking with my two
afternoons joy of baking with my two little boys was zapped by these photos
little boys was zapped by these photos
little boys was zapped by these photos on social media but it’s not just my
on social media but it’s not just my
on social media but it’s not just my cookies here is an example of the
cookies here is an example of the
cookies here is an example of the perfect family Christmas photo and
perfect family Christmas photo and
perfect family Christmas photo and here’s what happens when we take ours
yeah now it’s not i’m not alone I mean
yeah now it’s not i’m not alone I mean hasn’t anyone ever heard of hashtag
hasn’t anyone ever heard of hashtag
hasn’t anyone ever heard of hashtag pinterest fail now with all of this
pinterest fail now with all of this
pinterest fail now with all of this evidence of utter disaster before you
evidence of utter disaster before you
evidence of utter disaster before you you might be questioning my proposition
you might be questioning my proposition
you might be questioning my proposition that I am a supermom but I challenge you
that I am a supermom but I challenge you
that I am a supermom but I challenge you on this what is a supermom who is she
on this what is a supermom who is she
on this what is a supermom who is she anyways women have always worked outside
anyways women have always worked outside
anyways women have always worked outside the home but it wasn’t until World War
the home but it wasn’t until World War
the home but it wasn’t until World War two that we began entering workspace
two that we began entering workspace
two that we began entering workspace arenas that had been previously reserved
arenas that had been previously reserved
arenas that had been previously reserved just for men and in great numbers too
just for men and in great numbers too
just for men and in great numbers too now this trend increased in the 1970s
now this trend increased in the 1970s
now this trend increased in the 1970s whereupon this paragon of the supermom
whereupon this paragon of the supermom
whereupon this paragon of the supermom emerged she was a woman who could do it
emerged she was a woman who could do it
emerged she was a woman who could do it all and she would do it with a smile on
all and she would do it with a smile on
all and she would do it with a smile on her face she worked outside the home and
her face she worked outside the home and
her face she worked outside the home and when she was home she cooked she cleaned
when she was home she cooked she cleaned
when she was home she cooked she cleaned he arranged social calendars she made
he arranged social calendars she made
he arranged social calendars she made sure the entire family was well-fed and
sure the entire family was well-fed and
sure the entire family was well-fed and presentable she never left the house
presentable she never left the house
presentable she never left the house unless you look absolutely fabulous she
unless you look absolutely fabulous she
unless you look absolutely fabulous she worked really hard for her boss and she
worked really hard for her boss and she
worked really hard for her boss and she made her husband happy too now feminist
made her husband happy too now feminist
made her husband happy too now feminist said we could and should have it all so
said we could and should have it all so
said we could and should have it all so it’s no surprise that this ideal
it’s no surprise that this ideal
it’s no surprise that this ideal supermom was placed on a pedestal for
supermom was placed on a pedestal for
supermom was placed on a pedestal for all women to emulate and for little
all women to emulate and for little
all women to emulate and for little girls to strive toward I am a child of
girls to strive toward I am a child of
girls to strive toward I am a child of the 70s oh the supermom ideal was firmly
the 70s oh the supermom ideal was firmly
the 70s oh the supermom ideal was firmly entrenched in my psyche one day I would
entrenched in my psyche one day I would
entrenched in my psyche one day I would grow up to have it all and I would be
grow up to have it all and I would be
grow up to have it all and I would be great in 2016 it seems almost trying to
great in 2016 it seems almost trying to
great in 2016 it seems almost trying to say that women are a force we have
say that women are a force we have
say that women are a force we have degrees were high achieving we work in
degrees were high achieving we work in
degrees were high achieving we work in many perfections alongside men often in
many perfections alongside men often in
many perfections alongside men often in equal numbers because of all of the hard
equal numbers because of all of the hard
equal numbers because of all of the hard work of feminist before us we have more
work of feminist before us we have more
work of feminist before us we have more options in and outside of the home than
options in and outside of the home than
options in and outside of the home than ever before so why is it that so many
ever before so why is it that so many
ever before so why is it that so many women feel dare I say it inadequate
women feel dare I say it inadequate
women feel dare I say it inadequate I’m a former lawyer turned entrepreneur
I’m a former lawyer turned entrepreneur
I’m a former lawyer turned entrepreneur and a full-time stay-at-home mom to two
and a full-time stay-at-home mom to two
and a full-time stay-at-home mom to two little boys despite my two degrees and
little boys despite my two degrees and
little boys despite my two degrees and accomplishments I often feel inadequate
accomplishments I often feel inadequate
accomplishments I often feel inadequate and I’m not alone I’ve talked to many
and I’m not alone I’ve talked to many
and I’m not alone I’ve talked to many women from all walks of life and more
women from all walks of life and more
women from all walks of life and more often than not my sentiments are echoed
often than not my sentiments are echoed
often than not my sentiments are echoed in our conversations we feel this
in our conversations we feel this
in our conversations we feel this intense pressure to be everything to
intense pressure to be everything to
intense pressure to be everything to everyone at all times and when we’re not
everyone at all times and when we’re not
everyone at all times and when we’re not we feel guilty why is this now the risk
we feel guilty why is this now the risk
we feel guilty why is this now the risk of biting off more than I can chew do
of biting off more than I can chew do
of biting off more than I can chew do you remember those keep little reindeer
you remember those keep little reindeer
you remember those keep little reindeer cookies I think that my feelings of
cookies I think that my feelings of
cookies I think that my feelings of insecurity and failure surrounding those
insecurity and failure surrounding those
insecurity and failure surrounding those cookies are symptomatic of a of a
cookies are symptomatic of a of a
cookies are symptomatic of a of a pervasive and deeper problem in our
pervasive and deeper problem in our
pervasive and deeper problem in our society one that suppresses our
society one that suppresses our
society one that suppresses our superpowers in an age where photos of a
superpowers in an age where photos of a
superpowers in an age where photos of a new mom pumping breast milk as she runs
new mom pumping breast milk as she runs
new mom pumping breast milk as she runs a half marathon are splashed all over
a half marathon are splashed all over
a half marathon are splashed all over Facebook and Pinterest screams at us how
Facebook and Pinterest screams at us how
Facebook and Pinterest screams at us how to plan and execute the perfect cocktail
to plan and execute the perfect cocktail
to plan and execute the perfect cocktail or six year old birthday party what is a
or six year old birthday party what is a
or six year old birthday party what is a woman to do social media has raised the
woman to do social media has raised the
woman to do social media has raised the bar for the wannabe super mom even
bar for the wannabe super mom even
bar for the wannabe super mom even higher this tendency to compare
higher this tendency to compare
higher this tendency to compare ourselves to the publicly reported
ourselves to the publicly reported
ourselves to the publicly reported experiences of everyone we’ve ever had
experiences of everyone we’ve ever had
experiences of everyone we’ve ever had occasion to meet is ruinous to the self
occasion to meet is ruinous to the self
occasion to meet is ruinous to the self to our self-esteem and really zaps all
to our self-esteem and really zaps all
to our self-esteem and really zaps all joy out of life now I understand you
joy out of life now I understand you
joy out of life now I understand you with social media and the internet a
with social media and the internet a
with social media and the internet a very common and regular part of our
very common and regular part of our
very common and regular part of our daily lives it’s easy to lapse into this
daily lives it’s easy to lapse into this
daily lives it’s easy to lapse into this habit of comparing ourselves to
habit of comparing ourselves to
habit of comparing ourselves to literally the world it’s no longer not
literally the world it’s no longer not
literally the world it’s no longer not to keep up with the Joneses down the
to keep up with the Joneses down the
to keep up with the Joneses down the street we also have to
street we also have to
street we also have to with Sally from high school and everyone
with Sally from high school and everyone
with Sally from high school and everyone else we’ve ever accepted into our circle
else we’ve ever accepted into our circle
else we’ve ever accepted into our circle of friends what were once messy joyful
of friends what were once messy joyful
of friends what were once messy joyful unique life experiences are now but now
unique life experiences are now but now
unique life experiences are now but now try that a million times over and done
try that a million times over and done
try that a million times over and done better by someone else and we have
better by someone else and we have
better by someone else and we have pinterest facebook instagram or some
pinterest facebook instagram or some
pinterest facebook instagram or some other social media platform to prove it
other social media platform to prove it
other social media platform to prove it to us and if we do feel a sense of joy
to us and if we do feel a sense of joy
to us and if we do feel a sense of joy or accomplishment there seems to be this
or accomplishment there seems to be this
or accomplishment there seems to be this compulsion to snap a smartphone photo
compulsion to snap a smartphone photo
compulsion to snap a smartphone photo slap some sort of filter on it can call
slap some sort of filter on it can call
slap some sort of filter on it can call the perfect pithy post and share it with
the perfect pithy post and share it with
the perfect pithy post and share it with everyone and moreover if we don’t get
everyone and moreover if we don’t get
everyone and moreover if we don’t get that outward validation immediately
that outward validation immediately
that outward validation immediately bestowed upon us like like like like
bestowed upon us like like like like
bestowed upon us like like like like like and somehow the events must have
like and somehow the events must have
like and somehow the events must have been a failure and the memory becomes
been a failure and the memory becomes
been a failure and the memory becomes virtually meaningless julie spira who
virtually meaningless julie spira who
virtually meaningless julie spira who has written a lot about online etiquette
has written a lot about online etiquette
has written a lot about online etiquette has coined a new phrase for this social
has coined a new phrase for this social
has coined a new phrase for this social media anxiety disorder now although it’s
media anxiety disorder now although it’s
media anxiety disorder now although it’s not currently considered a medical
not currently considered a medical
not currently considered a medical condition I think we can imagine how one
condition I think we can imagine how one
condition I think we can imagine how one day it might be accepted is one
day it might be accepted is one
day it might be accepted is one especially when we think of the fact
especially when we think of the fact
especially when we think of the fact that in a survey of 7,000 mothers across
that in a survey of 7,000 mothers across
that in a survey of 7,000 mothers across the United States forty-two percent of
the United States forty-two percent of
the United States forty-two percent of respondents forty-two percent indicated
respondents forty-two percent indicated
respondents forty-two percent indicated that Pinterest causes them anxiety see
that Pinterest causes them anxiety see
that Pinterest causes them anxiety see it’s not just me of my cookies social
it’s not just me of my cookies social
it’s not just me of my cookies social media platforms allow us to share our
media platforms allow us to share our
media platforms allow us to share our lives Oh instantly and widely and that
lives Oh instantly and widely and that
lives Oh instantly and widely and that can be a good thing but it seems to me
can be a good thing but it seems to me
can be a good thing but it seems to me that they’ve evolved into this way to
that they’ve evolved into this way to
that they’ve evolved into this way to share sugar-coated fantastical versions
share sugar-coated fantastical versions
share sugar-coated fantastical versions of our lives no one is sharing their
of our lives no one is sharing their
of our lives no one is sharing their whole story they’re fake a facade
whole story they’re fake a facade
whole story they’re fake a facade revisionist history
revisionist history
revisionist history a fascinating thing to me is that I
a fascinating thing to me is that I
a fascinating thing to me is that I think we all suspect that this is the
think we all suspect that this is the
think we all suspect that this is the this is the case and yet we still feel
this is the case and yet we still feel
this is the case and yet we still feel this need to live up to some social
this need to live up to some social
this need to live up to some social media ideal to know what reality is my
media ideal to know what reality is my
media ideal to know what reality is my house looks like a Lego Beast vomited
house looks like a Lego Beast vomited
house looks like a Lego Beast vomited everywhere my boys need a bath and cilla
everywhere my boys need a bath and cilla
everywhere my boys need a bath and cilla why and last night we had white pasta
why and last night we had white pasta
why and last night we had white pasta with butter and cheese a game for the
with butter and cheese a game for the
with butter and cheese a game for the 10th time this one because you know what
10th time this one because you know what
10th time this one because you know what I am exhausted and I’m tired of having a
I am exhausted and I’m tired of having a
I am exhausted and I’m tired of having a please eat your vegetables argument but
please eat your vegetables argument but
please eat your vegetables argument but I would never share this on social media
I would never share this on social media
I would never share this on social media I fear being judged I wouldn’t be living
I fear being judged I wouldn’t be living
I fear being judged I wouldn’t be living up to those images of smiling
up to those images of smiling
up to those images of smiling vacationing families who go on long
vacationing families who go on long
vacationing families who go on long hikes with their kids without tears or
hikes with their kids without tears or
hikes with their kids without tears or temper tantrums no I can’t share this
temper tantrums no I can’t share this
temper tantrums no I can’t share this because I’m a supermom remember I got
because I’m a supermom remember I got
because I’m a supermom remember I got this it seems to me that this constant
this it seems to me that this constant
this it seems to me that this constant comparison with others online is like
comparison with others online is like
comparison with others online is like death by a thousand cuts these fleeting
death by a thousand cuts these fleeting
death by a thousand cuts these fleeting online interactions are eating at our
online interactions are eating at our
online interactions are eating at our sense of self-worth and they really dig
sense of self-worth and they really dig
sense of self-worth and they really dig at the heart it is said that it takes a
at the heart it is said that it takes a
at the heart it is said that it takes a village to raise a child well I don’t
village to raise a child well I don’t
village to raise a child well I don’t think that social media platforms the
think that social media platforms the
think that social media platforms the way they are now are actually the
way they are now are actually the
way they are now are actually the meeting space that we super bugs me but
meeting space that we super bugs me but
meeting space that we super bugs me but fear not there is still hope because oh
fear not there is still hope because oh
fear not there is still hope because oh yeah there you go we all are superheroes
yeah there you go we all are superheroes
yeah there you go we all are superheroes and we all have superpowers and among
and we all have superpowers and among
and we all have superpowers and among them we have the powers of discernment
them we have the powers of discernment
them we have the powers of discernment and the power of choice we can choose to
and the power of choice we can choose to
and the power of choice we can choose to use social media and the internet for
use social media and the internet for
use social media and the internet for good not for evil we can choose to
good not for evil we can choose to
good not for evil we can choose to reject some outward idealized notion of
reject some outward idealized notion of
reject some outward idealized notion of womanhood motherhood personhood
womanhood motherhood personhood
womanhood motherhood personhood we can break the habit of the constant
we can break the habit of the constant
we can break the habit of the constant comparisons with people online we can
comparisons with people online we can
comparisons with people online we can choose to recreate offline community and
choose to recreate offline community and
choose to recreate offline community and support one another and we can ensure at
support one another and we can ensure at
support one another and we can ensure at social media anxiety disorder does not
social media anxiety disorder does not
social media anxiety disorder does not become a next medicated psychological
become a next medicated psychological
become a next medicated psychological disease now I said at the outset that I
disease now I said at the outset that I
disease now I said at the outset that I would share with you how i found out
would share with you how i found out
would share with you how i found out that I’m a supermom so here goes I’m a
that I’m a supermom so here goes I’m a
that I’m a supermom so here goes I’m a little bit of a perfectionist and in
little bit of a perfectionist and in
little bit of a perfectionist and in many ways in my life this has not been a
many ways in my life this has not been a
many ways in my life this has not been a really healthy thing so I would make a
really healthy thing so I would make a
really healthy thing so I would make a very conscious effort with my two boys
very conscious effort with my two boys
very conscious effort with my two boys to instill point in them the knowledge
to instill point in them the knowledge
to instill point in them the knowledge and believe that perfection does not
and believe that perfection does not
and believe that perfection does not exist one night not long ago as I was
exist one night not long ago as I was
exist one night not long ago as I was putting my son’s to bed I was revisiting
putting my son’s to bed I was revisiting
putting my son’s to bed I was revisiting the day with my older son and we agreed
the day with my older son and we agreed
the day with my older son and we agreed that his behavior had not been stellar I
that his behavior had not been stellar I
that his behavior had not been stellar I said to him look I don’t expect you to
said to him look I don’t expect you to
said to him look I don’t expect you to be perfect I just ask that you do your
be perfect I just ask that you do your
be perfect I just ask that you do your best I’m not perfect I can admit that
best I’m not perfect I can admit that
best I’m not perfect I can admit that and he said to me whoa mama you’re
and he said to me whoa mama you’re
and he said to me whoa mama you’re perfect in one way being a little afraid
perfect in one way being a little afraid
perfect in one way being a little afraid what might pop out of his mouth I said
what might pop out of his mouth I said
what might pop out of his mouth I said how’s that your love for me is perfect
it’s in moments like these that I do
it’s in moments like these that I do believe I’m a supermom my life may not
believe I’m a supermom my life may not
believe I’m a supermom my life may not be Pinterest or Facebook perfect perfect
be Pinterest or Facebook perfect perfect
be Pinterest or Facebook perfect perfect but I’m a hero to at least one little
but I’m a hero to at least one little
but I’m a hero to at least one little boy and his younger brother if beauty is
boy and his younger brother if beauty is
boy and his younger brother if beauty is in the eye of the beholder then perhaps
in the eye of the beholder then perhaps
in the eye of the beholder then perhaps we should all start looking at ourselves
we should all start looking at ourselves
we should all start looking at ourselves the eyes of our children and our loved
the eyes of our children and our loved
the eyes of our children and our loved ones rather than these distorted aah
ones rather than these distorted aah
ones rather than these distorted aah goals of social media I think it’s time
goals of social media I think it’s time
goals of social media I think it’s time I made myself on you okay
I made myself on you okay
I made myself on you okay I betcha pinterest has the perfect
I betcha pinterest has the perfect
I betcha pinterest has the perfect patter
”
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