[Music] [Applause]
[Applause]
[Applause] when I was six years old I watched the
when I was six years old I watched the
when I was six years old I watched the movie Legally Blonde and I fell in love
movie Legally Blonde and I fell in love
movie Legally Blonde and I fell in love with Elle Woods
with Elle Woods
with Elle Woods I mean her intelligence her charisma her
I mean her intelligence her charisma her
I mean her intelligence her charisma her amazing shoe collection the girl was
amazing shoe collection the girl was
amazing shoe collection the girl was perfect and best of all she went to my
perfect and best of all she went to my
perfect and best of all she went to my dream school which of course was Harvard
dream school which of course was Harvard
dream school which of course was Harvard University now I held onto that dream
University now I held onto that dream
University now I held onto that dream for a couple of years until one brutal
for a couple of years until one brutal
for a couple of years until one brutal day when my dreams were crushed upon
day when my dreams were crushed upon
day when my dreams were crushed upon discovering the website College
discovering the website College
discovering the website College confidential in case you guys don’t know
confidential in case you guys don’t know
confidential in case you guys don’t know what that is it’s sort of an online
what that is it’s sort of an online
what that is it’s sort of an online college admissions forum
college admissions forum
college admissions forum regardless after browsing the site for a
regardless after browsing the site for a
regardless after browsing the site for a couple hours I pretty much decided I was
couple hours I pretty much decided I was
couple hours I pretty much decided I was screwed I became less and less certain
screwed I became less and less certain
screwed I became less and less certain that Harvard or any other college for
that Harvard or any other college for
that Harvard or any other college for that matter really had a place for me so
that matter really had a place for me so
that matter really had a place for me so I decided that doing as much as I could
I decided that doing as much as I could
I decided that doing as much as I could as fast as I could
as fast as I could
as fast as I could would be my ticket to a bright and shiny
would be my ticket to a bright and shiny
would be my ticket to a bright and shiny future I mean after all how often do you
future I mean after all how often do you
future I mean after all how often do you hear about the nice quiet ordinary girl
hear about the nice quiet ordinary girl
hear about the nice quiet ordinary girl next door changing the world
next door changing the world
next door changing the world you don’t instead you hear about people
you don’t instead you hear about people
you don’t instead you hear about people like Jacob Barnett a fourteen-year-old
like Jacob Barnett a fourteen-year-old
like Jacob Barnett a fourteen-year-old quantum physicist let me say that one
quantum physicist let me say that one
quantum physicist let me say that one more time a 14 year old quantum
more time a 14 year old quantum
more time a 14 year old quantum physicist who is currently expanding
physicist who is currently expanding
physicist who is currently expanding Einstein’s theory of relativity so you
Einstein’s theory of relativity so you
Einstein’s theory of relativity so you understand my dilemma from a young age I
understand my dilemma from a young age I
understand my dilemma from a young age I was certain achievements where the key
was certain achievements where the key
was certain achievements where the key to success success was the key to
to success success was the key to
to success success was the key to happiness and happiness well that was
happiness and happiness well that was
happiness and happiness well that was the key to a good life so really really
the key to a good life so really really
the key to a good life so really really using the transitive property and I knew
using the transitive property and I knew
using the transitive property and I knew this because I was a very gifted kid
this because I was a very gifted kid
this because I was a very gifted kid achievements equaled a good life and
achievements equaled a good life and
achievements equaled a good life and just like that I was locked into the
just like that I was locked into the
just like that I was locked into the overachiever mindset so I joined chorus
overachiever mindset so I joined chorus
overachiever mindset so I joined chorus and debate club and math club and art
and debate club and math club and art
and debate club and math club and art club and science club and the school’s
club and science club and the school’s
club and science club and the school’s literary magazine and the school
literary magazine and the school
literary magazine and the school newspaper and just about any other club
newspaper and just about any other club
newspaper and just about any other club that there was for the sake of having a
that there was for the sake of having a
that there was for the sake of having a club to put on my college application
club to put on my college application
club to put on my college application and in middle school everything was
and in middle school everything was
and in middle school everything was wonderful and I was brilliant in the
wonderful and I was brilliant in the
wonderful and I was brilliant in the whole world was just mine to claim until
whole world was just mine to claim until
whole world was just mine to claim until all of a sudden about three months into
all of a sudden about three months into
all of a sudden about three months into my freshman year when my 15 year old
my freshman year when my 15 year old
my freshman year when my 15 year old brain broke in a way that I couldn’t
brain broke in a way that I couldn’t
brain broke in a way that I couldn’t really imagine time
really imagine time
really imagine time for the first time I’d forgotten how to
for the first time I’d forgotten how to
for the first time I’d forgotten how to get out of bed in the morning I started
get out of bed in the morning I started
get out of bed in the morning I started getting emails from teachers asking me
getting emails from teachers asking me
getting emails from teachers asking me why I hadn’t turned in papers or
why I hadn’t turned in papers or
why I hadn’t turned in papers or homework assignments when the incomplete
homework assignments when the incomplete
homework assignments when the incomplete of assignments were sitting at the
of assignments were sitting at the
of assignments were sitting at the bottom of my backpack I quit all my
bottom of my backpack I quit all my
bottom of my backpack I quit all my sports skipped all of my clubs and ended
sports skipped all of my clubs and ended
sports skipped all of my clubs and ended up spending the rest of my freshman year
up spending the rest of my freshman year
up spending the rest of my freshman year on a psychiatrist couch now I’m sure you
on a psychiatrist couch now I’m sure you
on a psychiatrist couch now I’m sure you guys have all heard the story before
guys have all heard the story before
guys have all heard the story before right I mean maybe you’ve even
right I mean maybe you’ve even
right I mean maybe you’ve even experienced it
experienced it
experienced it textbook overachievers mental health
textbook overachievers mental health
textbook overachievers mental health takes a nosedive he or she reach their
takes a nosedive he or she reach their
takes a nosedive he or she reach their life and learned how to battle with
life and learned how to battle with
life and learned how to battle with depression and anxiety and emerge as a
depression and anxiety and emerge as a
depression and anxiety and emerge as a stronger and more balanced person like a
stronger and more balanced person like a
stronger and more balanced person like a butterfly out of a cocoon I mean it’s a
butterfly out of a cocoon I mean it’s a
butterfly out of a cocoon I mean it’s a lifetime movie but the question that
lifetime movie but the question that
lifetime movie but the question that we’re not asking enough and the question
we’re not asking enough and the question
we’re not asking enough and the question that desperately needs an answer is why
that desperately needs an answer is why
that desperately needs an answer is why have we heard the story so many times
have we heard the story so many times
have we heard the story so many times and the answer to that ties into the
and the answer to that ties into the
and the answer to that ties into the psychological trap of overachievement
psychological trap of overachievement
psychological trap of overachievement culture this philosophy permeates into
culture this philosophy permeates into
culture this philosophy permeates into and over to I mean we are all brilliant
and over to I mean we are all brilliant
and over to I mean we are all brilliant students but we are brilliant students
students but we are brilliant students
students but we are brilliant students that turn test scores into social
that turn test scores into social
that turn test scores into social currency and who brag about getting
currency and who brag about getting
currency and who brag about getting three hours of sleep and perhaps it’s a
three hours of sleep and perhaps it’s a
three hours of sleep and perhaps it’s a little bit more worrying is that we are
little bit more worrying is that we are
little bit more worrying is that we are not alone in this by subscribing to the
not alone in this by subscribing to the
not alone in this by subscribing to the belief that the more you do the better
belief that the more you do the better
belief that the more you do the better off you are
off you are
off you are our generation becomes hyper focused and
our generation becomes hyper focused and
our generation becomes hyper focused and hyper competitive and as a result we set
hyper competitive and as a result we set
hyper competitive and as a result we set ourselves up for a slew of problems in
ourselves up for a slew of problems in
ourselves up for a slew of problems in short our ambition is such a powerful
short our ambition is such a powerful
short our ambition is such a powerful tool but we’re using it wrong I’m really
tool but we’re using it wrong I’m really
tool but we’re using it wrong I’m really sorry like that was a lot to throw at
sorry like that was a lot to throw at
sorry like that was a lot to throw at you guys if it helps it’s like not your
you guys if it helps it’s like not your
you guys if it helps it’s like not your fault you guys are probably taught from
fault you guys are probably taught from
fault you guys are probably taught from a young age like over achievements
a young age like over achievements
a young age like over achievements supposed to be a good thing I mean we
supposed to be a good thing I mean we
supposed to be a good thing I mean we see it everywhere from magazine articles
see it everywhere from magazine articles
see it everywhere from magazine articles that praised multitasking to the laundry
that praised multitasking to the laundry
that praised multitasking to the laundry list of honors needed for the perfect
list of honors needed for the perfect
list of honors needed for the perfect college app so where exactly does doing
college app so where exactly does doing
college app so where exactly does doing it all go wrong well for starters and
it all go wrong well for starters and
it all go wrong well for starters and you all probably knew this one over
you all probably knew this one over
you all probably knew this one over achievement often comes at the expense
achievement often comes at the expense
achievement often comes at the expense of a healthy mind a 2010 study from San
of a healthy mind a 2010 study from San
of a healthy mind a 2010 study from San Diego State University reports that five
Diego State University reports that five
Diego State University reports that five times number of high school students
times number of high school students
times number of high school students have reported having depression and
have reported having depression and
have reported having depression and anxiety as compared to the counterpart
anxiety as compared to the counterpart
anxiety as compared to the counterpart to the 1920s and 30s then I put this
to the 1920s and 30s then I put this
to the 1920s and 30s then I put this fact in historical context the 1920s and
fact in historical context the 1920s and
fact in historical context the 1920s and 30s are known as the Great Depression
30s are known as the Great Depression
30s are known as the Great Depression just think about it the diseases that
just think about it the diseases that
just think about it the diseases that stem from overachievement culture come
stem from overachievement culture come
stem from overachievement culture come from a need for validation students
from a need for validation students
from a need for validation students ultimately just need to prove that they
ultimately just need to prove that they
ultimately just need to prove that they are enough to each other to their
are enough to each other to their
are enough to each other to their parents even to themselves for a
parents even to themselves for a
parents even to themselves for a devastating example let’s take a look
devastating example let’s take a look
devastating example let’s take a look across the country in Palo Alto which is
across the country in Palo Alto which is
across the country in Palo Alto which is clear Stanford Territory a series of
clear Stanford Territory a series of
clear Stanford Territory a series of devastating suicides committed by
devastating suicides committed by
devastating suicides committed by seemingly happy popular talented kids
seemingly happy popular talented kids
seemingly happy popular talented kids forced parents and educators to
forced parents and educators to
forced parents and educators to reevaluate the environment in which they
reevaluate the environment in which they
reevaluate the environment in which they are raising their children
are raising their children
are raising their children Carolyn Wentworth a senior at Palo Alto
Carolyn Wentworth a senior at Palo Alto
Carolyn Wentworth a senior at Palo Alto High School discussed her frustration
High School discussed her frustration
High School discussed her frustration with the way that she felt everyone in
with the way that she felt everyone in
with the way that she felt everyone in her life from school administration to
her life from school administration to
her life from school administration to her own best friend dealt with the
her own best friend dealt with the
her own best friend dealt with the pressure to achieve she said we are not
pressure to achieve she said we are not
pressure to achieve she said we are not students we are lifeless bodies in a
students we are lifeless bodies in a
students we are lifeless bodies in a system that breeds competition and
system that breeds competition and
system that breeds competition and hatred and discourages teamwork and
hatred and discourages teamwork and
hatred and discourages teamwork and genuine learning relax sincere passion
genuine learning relax sincere passion
genuine learning relax sincere passion we are sick now back across the
we are sick now back across the
we are sick now back across the continent I hear the sentiment all the
continent I hear the sentiment all the
continent I hear the sentiment all the time
time
time from my friends at home and especially
from my friends at home and especially
from my friends at home and especially from my friends here I mean we talked
from my friends here I mean we talked
from my friends here I mean we talked about how stressed out everyone here
about how stressed out everyone here
about how stressed out everyone here makes us right we talked about how a
makes us right we talked about how a
makes us right we talked about how a part of us cringes when we hear about
part of us cringes when we hear about
part of us cringes when we hear about that freshman that took all of a Subject
that freshman that took all of a Subject
that freshman that took all of a Subject Tests in eighth grade because we’ve only
Tests in eighth grade because we’ve only
Tests in eighth grade because we’ve only taken two and we’re juniors we talk
taken two and we’re juniors we talk
taken two and we’re juniors we talk about how part of us panics when we hear
about how part of us panics when we hear
about how part of us panics when we hear about our friends amazing summer job
about our friends amazing summer job
about our friends amazing summer job teaching English in Tibet because it’s
teaching English in Tibet because it’s
teaching English in Tibet because it’s exactly the quirky unrelatable yet
exactly the quirky unrelatable yet
exactly the quirky unrelatable yet relentlessly talented thing that college
relentlessly talented thing that college
relentlessly talented thing that college admissions are looking for and then
admissions are looking for and then
admissions are looking for and then instead of questioning why we feel this
instead of questioning why we feel this
instead of questioning why we feel this way or whether or not we should we
way or whether or not we should we
way or whether or not we should we basically go out to the world and do the
basically go out to the world and do the
basically go out to the world and do the exact same thing now to make matters
exact same thing now to make matters
exact same thing now to make matters worse the negative impact of
worse the negative impact of
worse the negative impact of overachievement
overachievement
overachievement doesn’t end when we get into college and
doesn’t end when we get into college and
doesn’t end when we get into college and I’d like to take the time to express my
I’d like to take the time to express my
I’d like to take the time to express my sincerest condolences to the seniors who
sincerest condolences to the seniors who
sincerest condolences to the seniors who expected it – psychologist Adrienne firm
expected it – psychologist Adrienne firm
expected it – psychologist Adrienne firm and explains that overachievers desire
and explains that overachievers desire
and explains that overachievers desire for perfection and accomplishment
for perfection and accomplishment
for perfection and accomplishment actually leaves them feeling vulnerable
actually leaves them feeling vulnerable
actually leaves them feeling vulnerable and haunted by an overall sense of
and haunted by an overall sense of
and haunted by an overall sense of failure despite their best efforts now
failure despite their best efforts now
failure despite their best efforts now the traits that we cultivate in high
the traits that we cultivate in high
the traits that we cultivate in high school will follow us through higher
school will follow us through higher
school will follow us through higher education and into the workplace which
education and into the workplace which
education and into the workplace which means that that feeling is going to
means that that feeling is going to
means that that feeling is going to follow overachievers wherever they
follow overachievers wherever they
follow overachievers wherever they failed
failed
failed have it all whether that means getting a
have it all whether that means getting a
have it all whether that means getting a bad grade on a paper or missing out in a
bad grade on a paper or missing out in a
bad grade on a paper or missing out in a promotion so the question that were left
promotion so the question that were left
promotion so the question that were left with now is what do we do about it
with now is what do we do about it
with now is what do we do about it what can lead to about it how can we re
what can lead to about it how can we re
what can lead to about it how can we re educate a generation of kids who have
educate a generation of kids who have
educate a generation of kids who have been relentlessly taught that more is
been relentlessly taught that more is
been relentlessly taught that more is better that more is the key to getting
better that more is the key to getting
better that more is the key to getting into a good college and getting a good
into a good college and getting a good
into a good college and getting a good job and earning a good life now my
job and earning a good life now my
job and earning a good life now my battle with overachievement culture has
battle with overachievement culture has
battle with overachievement culture has been long and complicated I’m still
been long and complicated I’m still
been long and complicated I’m still working with it every day but what I
working with it every day but what I
working with it every day but what I figured out so far at least is that it
figured out so far at least is that it
figured out so far at least is that it comes down to three major areas and I’d
comes down to three major areas and I’d
comes down to three major areas and I’d say if you can accomplish at least one
say if you can accomplish at least one
say if you can accomplish at least one of these then you’re off to a pretty
of these then you’re off to a pretty
of these then you’re off to a pretty good start first redefine achievement
good start first redefine achievement
good start first redefine achievement over achievement culture promises that
over achievement culture promises that
over achievement culture promises that the more you do the better off you are
the more you do the better off you are
the more you do the better off you are now here’s the thing overachievement
now here’s the thing overachievement
now here’s the thing overachievement does not equate to high achievement high
does not equate to high achievement high
does not equate to high achievement high achievers are described by slates and
achievers are described by slates and
achievers are described by slates and our CEO fort interactive as strategists
our CEO fort interactive as strategists
our CEO fort interactive as strategists they know when to wait when to attack
they know when to wait when to attack
they know when to wait when to attack when to sacrifice and when to change
when to sacrifice and when to change
when to sacrifice and when to change direction they achieve their victories
direction they achieve their victories
direction they achieve their victories on nonlinear paths and now here’s the
on nonlinear paths and now here’s the
on nonlinear paths and now here’s the good news for you high achievers are
good news for you high achievers are
good news for you high achievers are actually more likely to be promoted in
actually more likely to be promoted in
actually more likely to be promoted in the workplace and are genuinely thought
the workplace and are genuinely thought
the workplace and are genuinely thought of as leading happier healthier and more
of as leading happier healthier and more
of as leading happier healthier and more productive lives in short high
productive lives in short high
productive lives in short high achievement not over achievement is the
achievement not over achievement is the
achievement not over achievement is the key to a good life now second and
key to a good life now second and
key to a good life now second and perhaps equally as important is the idea
perhaps equally as important is the idea
perhaps equally as important is the idea that we do not achieve alone we do not
that we do not achieve alone we do not
that we do not achieve alone we do not exist in a vacuum with our trophies and
exist in a vacuum with our trophies and
exist in a vacuum with our trophies and our certificates removed from everyone
our certificates removed from everyone
our certificates removed from everyone else
else
else remember Carolyn Wentworth the senior
remember Carolyn Wentworth the senior
remember Carolyn Wentworth the senior from Palo Alto she expressed her
from Palo Alto she expressed her
from Palo Alto she expressed her distaste at the fact that her school
distaste at the fact that her school
distaste at the fact that her school bred competition and discouraged
bred competition and discouraged
bred competition and discouraged teamwork now remember your friends with
teamwork now remember your friends with
teamwork now remember your friends with the summer job in Tibet encouraged her
the summer job in Tibet encouraged her
the summer job in Tibet encouraged her love her support her and be proud of her
love her support her and be proud of her
love her support her and be proud of her accomplishments because get this you can
accomplishments because get this you can
accomplishments because get this you can be proud of your own – you have enough
be proud of your own – you have enough
be proud of your own – you have enough pride in yourself to share it remind
pride in yourself to share it remind
pride in yourself to share it remind your friends of that remind strangers
your friends of that remind strangers
your friends of that remind strangers sitting in silent of that remind the
sitting in silent of that remind the
sitting in silent of that remind the scared little eighth grader that you’re
scared little eighth grader that you’re
scared little eighth grader that you’re giving a tour to of that your peers are
giving a tour to of that your peers are
giving a tour to of that your peers are not your enemies
not your enemies
not your enemies for achievement culture damages us and
for achievement culture damages us and
for achievement culture damages us and insulates us in a quiet and insidious
insulates us in a quiet and insidious
insulates us in a quiet and insidious way the more you talk about your
way the more you talk about your
way the more you talk about your achievements and the more you talk about
achievements and the more you talk about
achievements and the more you talk about them in a positive light the more you
them in a positive light the more you
them in a positive light the more you can turn your ambition from a prison
can turn your ambition from a prison
can turn your ambition from a prison into a tool now finally and perhaps most
into a tool now finally and perhaps most
into a tool now finally and perhaps most importantly but in my opinion the
importantly but in my opinion the
importantly but in my opinion the hardest thing to do know when to stop
hardest thing to do know when to stop
hardest thing to do know when to stop all of us at andover have ambition all
all of us at andover have ambition all
all of us at andover have ambition all of our generation has ambition but
of our generation has ambition but
of our generation has ambition but relentless ambition is almost synonymous
relentless ambition is almost synonymous
relentless ambition is almost synonymous with over achievement here is my honest
with over achievement here is my honest
with over achievement here is my honest advice to you take breaks let things go
advice to you take breaks let things go
advice to you take breaks let things go I really mean it on this one let things
I really mean it on this one let things
I really mean it on this one let things go choose what you love and pursue what
go choose what you love and pursue what
go choose what you love and pursue what you love and value those accomplishments
you love and value those accomplishments
you love and value those accomplishments and maybe I mean with the spare time
and maybe I mean with the spare time
and maybe I mean with the spare time that you guys have saved yourself from
that you guys have saved yourself from
that you guys have saved yourself from taking all those breaks and letting
taking all those breaks and letting
taking all those breaks and letting things go you can watch Legally Blonde
things go you can watch Legally Blonde
things go you can watch Legally Blonde it really is a good movie thank you very
it really is a good movie thank you very
it really is a good movie thank you very much
much
much [Applause]
”
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