my wife and I both have very different ideas of just how involved a human being
ideas of just how involved a human being
ideas of just how involved a human being should be on social media for instance
should be on social media for instance
should be on social media for instance my wife has 40 Facebook friends I have
my wife has 40 Facebook friends I have
my wife has 40 Facebook friends I have 4,000 this talk started about a year and
4,000 this talk started about a year and
4,000 this talk started about a year and a half ago lying back in bed with my
a half ago lying back in bed with my
a half ago lying back in bed with my wife we both had our laptops in front of
wife we both had our laptops in front of
wife we both had our laptops in front of us both of us were on Facebook when my
us both of us were on Facebook when my
us both of us were on Facebook when my wife turned to me and she said ooh
wife turned to me and she said ooh
wife turned to me and she said ooh joaquin what is this notification mean
joaquin what is this notification mean
joaquin what is this notification mean that I got I leaned over look at the
that I got I leaned over look at the
that I got I leaned over look at the screen and I said that is a Facebook
screen and I said that is a Facebook
screen and I said that is a Facebook message request she said what’s that
message request she said what’s that
message request she said what’s that I said that’s when someone who’s not
I said that’s when someone who’s not
I said that’s when someone who’s not your friend
your friend
your friend on Facebook is asking you for permission
on Facebook is asking you for permission
on Facebook is asking you for permission to simply send you a message you don’t
to simply send you a message you don’t
to simply send you a message you don’t even have to open that thing you can
even have to open that thing you can
even have to open that thing you can just hit decline on that sucker she said
just hit decline on that sucker she said
just hit decline on that sucker she said I’ve never gotten one I’m going to
I’ve never gotten one I’m going to
I’ve never gotten one I’m going to accept it and I’m going to open it and
accept it and I’m going to open it and
accept it and I’m going to open it and she did and then she read the message
she did and then she read the message
she did and then she read the message and then her face contorted into an
and then her face contorted into an
and then her face contorted into an expression that I’ve never seen in all
expression that I’ve never seen in all
expression that I’ve never seen in all of our years of marriage and she turned
of our years of marriage and she turned
of our years of marriage and she turned to me and she said Joaquin this message
to me and she said Joaquin this message
to me and she said Joaquin this message isn’t for me it’s someone trying to get
isn’t for me it’s someone trying to get
isn’t for me it’s someone trying to get a hold of you you need to read this now
a hold of you you need to read this now
a hold of you you need to read this now she handed me your laptop and that’s
she handed me your laptop and that’s
she handed me your laptop and that’s when I read it 23 words
when I read it 23 words
when I read it 23 words 23 words that would change my life
23 words that would change my life
23 words that would change my life forever 23 words that would inspire a
forever 23 words that would inspire a
forever 23 words that would inspire a book 23 words that would give me
book 23 words that would give me
book 23 words that would give me something I’ve been searching for my
something I’ve been searching for my
something I’ve been searching for my entire life
entire life
entire life the ability to forgive the message read
you don’t know me not really and I hate
you don’t know me not really and I hate to tell you like this but my father I
to tell you like this but my father I
to tell you like this but my father I mean our Father has died and that’s how
mean our Father has died and that’s how
mean our Father has died and that’s how I found out but the man who left my
I found out but the man who left my
I found out but the man who left my mother and me when I was 1 year old had
mother and me when I was 1 year old had
mother and me when I was 1 year old had passed away from a Facebook message from
passed away from a Facebook message from
passed away from a Facebook message from a stranger who shared half of my blood
a stranger who shared half of my blood
a stranger who shared half of my blood at this point in my life I was halfway
at this point in my life I was halfway
at this point in my life I was halfway through my MFA that’s a master in Fine
through my MFA that’s a master in Fine
through my MFA that’s a master in Fine Arts with a concentration in poetry I
Arts with a concentration in poetry I
Arts with a concentration in poetry I was studying the Institute of American
was studying the Institute of American
was studying the Institute of American Indian arts in Santa Fe New Mexico and
Indian arts in Santa Fe New Mexico and
Indian arts in Santa Fe New Mexico and to the professors I was studying under
to the professors I was studying under
to the professors I was studying under sherwin but Suey and Santi Frazer
sherwin but Suey and Santi Frazer
sherwin but Suey and Santi Frazer instructed us to tack our manuscript up
instructed us to tack our manuscript up
instructed us to tack our manuscript up on our office wall or bedroom wall and
on our office wall or bedroom wall and
on our office wall or bedroom wall and tack new revisions of existing poems on
tack new revisions of existing poems on
tack new revisions of existing poems on top of the older one so you could see
top of the older one so you could see
top of the older one so you could see the book grow in depth and in length
the book grow in depth and in length
the book grow in depth and in length before your eyes I was halfway through
before your eyes I was halfway through
before your eyes I was halfway through my book my manuscript at this time I
my book my manuscript at this time I
my book my manuscript at this time I walked into my office that night after
walked into my office that night after
walked into my office that night after reading that message because I couldn’t
reading that message because I couldn’t
reading that message because I couldn’t sleep and I looked at these 36 pages of
sleep and I looked at these 36 pages of
sleep and I looked at these 36 pages of a book
a book
a book my halfway point and I ripped them all
my halfway point and I ripped them all
my halfway point and I ripped them all down and I sat at my desk and I wrote
down and I sat at my desk and I wrote
down and I sat at my desk and I wrote down on a piece of paper one question
down on a piece of paper one question
down on a piece of paper one question Joaquin how did your father’s absence
Joaquin how did your father’s absence
Joaquin how did your father’s absence make you feel as a young person I wrote
make you feel as a young person I wrote
make you feel as a young person I wrote down one word degraded and then I opened
down one word degraded and then I opened
down one word degraded and then I opened my my laptop again and I typed into the
my my laptop again and I typed into the
my my laptop again and I typed into the search engine the word degradation and
search engine the word degradation and
search engine the word degradation and it sent me to a scientific article on
it sent me to a scientific article on
it sent me to a scientific article on the top ten causes of degradation for
the top ten causes of degradation for
the top ten causes of degradation for topsoil or earth landmass and I looked
topsoil or earth landmass and I looked
topsoil or earth landmass and I looked at these ten bold words these large
at these ten bold words these large
at these ten bold words these large destructive words and I asked myself
destructive words and I asked myself
destructive words and I asked myself could I write a poem using these ten
could I write a poem using these ten
could I write a poem using these ten words to my father and that night I
words to my father and that night I
words to my father and that night I wrote this this is called causes of
wrote this this is called causes of
wrote this this is called causes of degradation
air pollution she left the photos up for
air pollution she left the photos up for a while
a while
a while you hung over us like sulfur dioxide
you hung over us like sulfur dioxide
you hung over us like sulfur dioxide visible and invisible my smile on your
visible and invisible my smile on your
visible and invisible my smile on your face in the Polaroids I took them down
face in the Polaroids I took them down
face in the Polaroids I took them down one night as she slept hid them from her
one night as she slept hid them from her
one night as she slept hid them from her and a boys desperate attempt to clear
and a boys desperate attempt to clear
and a boys desperate attempt to clear the air a son will do anything to help
the air a son will do anything to help
the air a son will do anything to help his mother breathe easier fires so many
his mother breathe easier fires so many
his mother breathe easier fires so many nights she pulled the lid unfiltered
nights she pulled the lid unfiltered
nights she pulled the lid unfiltered camel from between your lips she told me
camel from between your lips she told me
camel from between your lips she told me more than once you almost burned us to
more than once you almost burned us to
more than once you almost burned us to the ground as we slept when you leave
the ground as we slept when you leave
the ground as we slept when you leave something unattended negligently discard
something unattended negligently discard
something unattended negligently discard cigarettes sons and all smudge they such
cigarettes sons and all smudge they such
cigarettes sons and all smudge they such all such small things you turn flesh
all such small things you turn flesh
all such small things you turn flesh into debris the ultimate goal of the
into debris the ultimate goal of the
into debris the ultimate goal of the arsonist is to destroy wholly or in part
arsonist is to destroy wholly or in part
arsonist is to destroy wholly or in part over-exploitation you tried so hard to
over-exploitation you tried so hard to
over-exploitation you tried so hard to ruin us with your carelessness hands
ruin us with your carelessness hands
ruin us with your carelessness hands covered in paint above a once blank
covered in paint above a once blank
covered in paint above a once blank canvas and over abstraction just a fancy
canvas and over abstraction just a fancy
canvas and over abstraction just a fancy word for prolonged periods of drought
word for prolonged periods of drought
word for prolonged periods of drought logging you uprooted sapling pinyon no
logging you uprooted sapling pinyon no
logging you uprooted sapling pinyon no gallito Jesus stripped it and left it
gallito Jesus stripped it and left it
gallito Jesus stripped it and left it bare there was no way to hold the soil
bare there was no way to hold the soil
bare there was no way to hold the soil in place
in place
in place insects surely you must know
insects surely you must know
insects surely you must know encroachment of any kind can contribute
encroachment of any kind can contribute
encroachment of any kind can contribute to the loss of something small and rare
to the loss of something small and rare
to the loss of something small and rare pests and vegetation diseases eventually
pests and vegetation diseases eventually
pests and vegetation diseases eventually I poured gasoline on the photos set them
I poured gasoline on the photos set them
I poured gasoline on the photos set them ablaze cleansing by fire I watched our
ablaze cleansing by fire I watched our
ablaze cleansing by fire I watched our faces blackened in the flame any poison
faces blackened in the flame any poison
faces blackened in the flame any poison meant to kill the predator will
meant to kill the predator will
meant to kill the predator will eventually destroy the prey firewood
eventually destroy the prey firewood
eventually destroy the prey firewood scavenging in the darkest part of the
scavenging in the darkest part of the
scavenging in the darkest part of the forest moss grow so deep that walking
forest moss grow so deep that walking
forest moss grow so deep that walking makes no sound this is how you slipped
makes no sound this is how you slipped
makes no sound this is how you slipped away into the ink shoes in one hand
away into the ink shoes in one hand
away into the ink shoes in one hand Flint in the other silently searching
Flint in the other silently searching
Flint in the other silently searching for cattails fungus compressed flower
for cattails fungus compressed flower
for cattails fungus compressed flower tops to catch the spark when you apply
tops to catch the spark when you apply
tops to catch the spark when you apply heat but starving a breath the Ember
heat but starving a breath the Ember
heat but starving a breath the Ember becomes highly combustible animal
becomes highly combustible animal
becomes highly combustible animal foraging if given the choice we would
foraging if given the choice we would
foraging if given the choice we would rather freeze than starve even in winter
rather freeze than starve even in winter
rather freeze than starve even in winter we would
we would
we would seek farther Forge longer than our
seek farther Forge longer than our
seek farther Forge longer than our fathers we came to know intense
fathers we came to know intense
fathers we came to know intense shivering and slurred speech in in an
shivering and slurred speech in in an
shivering and slurred speech in in an intimate way pasturing and over grazing
intimate way pasturing and over grazing
intimate way pasturing and over grazing it is uncertain how long the recovery
it is uncertain how long the recovery
it is uncertain how long the recovery period will last we should have known
period will last we should have known
period will last we should have known something wild and non-native would
something wild and non-native would
something wild and non-native would refuse to take root in such an arid
refuse to take root in such an arid
refuse to take root in such an arid place industrialization there was
place industrialization there was
place industrialization there was nothing natural about the rhythm we
nothing natural about the rhythm we
nothing natural about the rhythm we created there was never a homeland to be
created there was never a homeland to be
created there was never a homeland to be lost
lost
lost urbanization fatherless boys find each
urbanization fatherless boys find each
urbanization fatherless boys find each other become brothers bound to one
other become brothers bound to one
other become brothers bound to one another by the want of blood though
another by the want of blood though
another by the want of blood though shifting variables make predictions
shifting variables make predictions
shifting variables make predictions about future growth next to impossible
about future growth next to impossible
about future growth next to impossible some things were certain natural causes
some things were certain natural causes
some things were certain natural causes included earthquakes storms and wildboy
included earthquakes storms and wildboy
included earthquakes storms and wildboy setting photos on fire economic impact
setting photos on fire economic impact
setting photos on fire economic impact was a child-support check that bounced
was a child-support check that bounced
was a child-support check that bounced over population was three brothers
over population was three brothers
over population was three brothers sleeping on a fold-out couch in the
sleeping on a fold-out couch in the
sleeping on a fold-out couch in the living room
living room
living room extinction was a cop car parked near the
extinction was a cop car parked near the
extinction was a cop car parked near the corner beneath the boulevard at mañana
corner beneath the boulevard at mañana
corner beneath the boulevard at mañana Avenue it was also close so far away I
Avenue it was also close so far away I
Avenue it was also close so far away I can remember as a young person feeling
can remember as a young person feeling
can remember as a young person feeling degraded by my father’s absence but
degraded by my father’s absence but
degraded by my father’s absence but writing these poems got me thinking a
writing these poems got me thinking a
writing these poems got me thinking a lot about my father and yes my father
lot about my father and yes my father
lot about my father and yes my father did make a choice to leave me but
did make a choice to leave me but
did make a choice to leave me but writing these poems made me realize that
writing these poems made me realize that
writing these poems made me realize that he made that choice when he was a very
he made that choice when he was a very
he made that choice when he was a very young men and as you all know young men
young men and as you all know young men
young men and as you all know young men will sometimes do stupid selfish things
will sometimes do stupid selfish things
will sometimes do stupid selfish things and that does not make him a bad man
and that does not make him a bad man
and that does not make him a bad man that makes him a man who did a bad thing
that makes him a man who did a bad thing
that makes him a man who did a bad thing and there is a difference as I was
and there is a difference as I was
and there is a difference as I was writing these poems early in the process
writing these poems early in the process
writing these poems early in the process they were about pain but that quickly
they were about pain but that quickly
they were about pain but that quickly transmuted into forgiveness it wasn’t
transmuted into forgiveness it wasn’t
transmuted into forgiveness it wasn’t long into the process of writing these
long into the process of writing these
long into the process of writing these poems that I wrote this next one it’s
poems that I wrote this next one it’s
poems that I wrote this next one it’s called archetypes three
called archetypes three
called archetypes three I will tell you three things about my
I will tell you three things about my
I will tell you three things about my father and one will be a lie
father and one will be a lie
father and one will be a lie my father left the year I was born my
my father left the year I was born my
my father left the year I was born my father’s heart like mine and yours is
father’s heart like mine and yours is
father’s heart like mine and yours is made up of four chambers but only three
made up of four chambers but only three
made up of four chambers but only three work well my father’s left atrium broke
work well my father’s left atrium broke
work well my father’s left atrium broke the day he walked away from me there
the day he walked away from me there
the day he walked away from me there were three of us we all came from
were three of us we all came from
were three of us we all came from different fathers but the same mother we
different fathers but the same mother we
different fathers but the same mother we all have different colored eyes but the
all have different colored eyes but the
all have different colored eyes but the same smile we’re all different but the
same smile we’re all different but the
same smile we’re all different but the same we’re all different but the same
same we’re all different but the same
same we’re all different but the same we’re all different but the same four I
we’re all different but the same four I
we’re all different but the same four I think I’ve only loved four women in my
think I’ve only loved four women in my
think I’ve only loved four women in my life well at some point you should take
life well at some point you should take
life well at some point you should take all the money in your wallet and spend
all the money in your wallet and spend
all the money in your wallet and spend it on the women in your life you have
it on the women in your life you have
it on the women in your life you have loved well at this exact moment counting
loved well at this exact moment counting
loved well at this exact moment counting the change in my pocket I currently have
the change in my pocket I currently have
the change in my pocket I currently have just under seven dollars on me I would
just under seven dollars on me I would
just under seven dollars on me I would buy the first woman a white peach
buy the first woman a white peach
buy the first woman a white peach because she once moaned after biting
because she once moaned after biting
because she once moaned after biting into one I would buy the second woman a
into one I would buy the second woman a
into one I would buy the second woman a pack of sugar-free gum because she is
pack of sugar-free gum because she is
pack of sugar-free gum because she is diabetic
diabetic
diabetic I’ll buy the third woman a disposable
I’ll buy the third woman a disposable
I’ll buy the third woman a disposable camera which seems insignificant but oh
camera which seems insignificant but oh
camera which seems insignificant but oh can you imagine the possibilities and
can you imagine the possibilities and
can you imagine the possibilities and those 24 exposures the fourth woman I
those 24 exposures the fourth woman I
those 24 exposures the fourth woman I would give this poem as I would likely
would give this poem as I would likely
would give this poem as I would likely be out of money at this point now this
be out of money at this point now this
be out of money at this point now this part of the poem says as much about the
part of the poem says as much about the
part of the poem says as much about the fourth woman’s love of money a love of
fourth woman’s love of money a love of
fourth woman’s love of money a love of poetry as it does about my ability to
poetry as it does about my ability to
poetry as it does about my ability to budget money well I’m writing this poem
budget money well I’m writing this poem
budget money well I’m writing this poem in an airport my flight lands at 4:00
in an airport my flight lands at 4:00
in an airport my flight lands at 4:00 p.m. and there’s a very good chance my
p.m. and there’s a very good chance my
p.m. and there’s a very good chance my phone will be dead by then when I land I
phone will be dead by then when I land I
phone will be dead by then when I land I don’t want to call the four women
don’t want to call the four women
don’t want to call the four women I’ve loved well I want to call all the
I’ve loved well I want to call all the
I’ve loved well I want to call all the women I did not love well and tell them
women I did not love well and tell them
women I did not love well and tell them just how sorry I am I’m sorry I’m sorry
just how sorry I am I’m sorry I’m sorry
just how sorry I am I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry seven my favorite
I’m sorry I’m sorry seven my favorite
I’m sorry I’m sorry seven my favorite movie growing up as a kid was the
movie growing up as a kid was the
movie growing up as a kid was the Magnificent Seven a remake of a classic
Magnificent Seven a remake of a classic
Magnificent Seven a remake of a classic Japanese film the Seven Samurai in terms
Japanese film the Seven Samurai in terms
Japanese film the Seven Samurai in terms of film my favorite childhood movie is
of film my favorite childhood movie is
of film my favorite childhood movie is an American bastard but it’s a good one
an American bastard but it’s a good one
an American bastard but it’s a good one so am I so are my brothers
so am I so are my brothers
so am I so are my brothers you could teach a class on archetypal
you could teach a class on archetypal
you could teach a class on archetypal symbolism from the chest that film alone
symbolism from the chest that film alone
symbolism from the chest that film alone the star that film yul brenner died of
the star that film yul brenner died of
the star that film yul brenner died of lung cancer just before he died he shot
lung cancer just before he died he shot
lung cancer just before he died he shot one of the most powerful and poignant
one of the most powerful and poignant
one of the most powerful and poignant public service announcements that PSA
public service announcements that PSA
public service announcements that PSA ends with yul brenner staring into your
ends with yul brenner staring into your
ends with yul brenner staring into your soul from inside the black and white
soul from inside the black and white
soul from inside the black and white television repeating three words just
television repeating three words just
television repeating three words just don’t smoke I swear it must have run
don’t smoke I swear it must have run
don’t smoke I swear it must have run seven times a night during the prime
seven times a night during the prime
seven times a night during the prime time of my youth and though I can’t be
time of my youth and though I can’t be
time of my youth and though I can’t be certain of it I think those may have
certain of it I think those may have
certain of it I think those may have been your Brenner’s last words when I
been your Brenner’s last words when I
been your Brenner’s last words when I was seven I learned that my father
was seven I learned that my father
was seven I learned that my father smoked unfiltered camels so did you’ll
smoked unfiltered camels so did you’ll
smoked unfiltered camels so did you’ll bring er and though I can’t be certain
bring er and though I can’t be certain
bring er and though I can’t be certain of it I think in the end will not be my
of it I think in the end will not be my
of it I think in the end will not be my father’s actual broken heart no will it
father’s actual broken heart no will it
father’s actual broken heart no will it be his metaphorical broken heart that
be his metaphorical broken heart that
be his metaphorical broken heart that gets the best of him in the end it will
gets the best of him in the end it will
gets the best of him in the end it will be his lungs and I his firstborn son
be his lungs and I his firstborn son
be his lungs and I his firstborn son will not get to be there to hold his
will not get to be there to hold his
will not get to be there to hold his hand when he dies
hand when he dies
hand when he dies and when I get to hear his last words I
and when I get to hear his last words I
and when I get to hear his last words I will not get to ask for or accept
will not get to ask for or accept
will not get to ask for or accept forgiveness in the end there will be
forgiveness in the end there will be
forgiveness in the end there will be only silence I forgive you I forgive you
only silence I forgive you I forgive you
only silence I forgive you I forgive you I forgive you I forgive you
I forgive you I forgive you
I forgive you I forgive you I forgive you I forgive you I forgive
I forgive you I forgive you I forgive
I forgive you I forgive you I forgive you I just found out my flight is
you I just found out my flight is
you I just found out my flight is delayed it will not land until 7:00 p.m.
delayed it will not land until 7:00 p.m.
delayed it will not land until 7:00 p.m. well the women I did not love well
well the women I did not love well
well the women I did not love well forgive me for my silence or those times
forgive me for my silence or those times
forgive me for my silence or those times I should have been silent but was not
I should have been silent but was not
I should have been silent but was not well they forgive me for my carelessness
well they forgive me for my carelessness
well they forgive me for my carelessness with money or my carelessness with all
with money or my carelessness with all
with money or my carelessness with all four chambers of the human heart when
four chambers of the human heart when
four chambers of the human heart when they forgive me for loving words more
they forgive me for loving words more
they forgive me for loving words more than I love them or they forgive me for
than I love them or they forgive me for
than I love them or they forgive me for all the poems I’ve written about them or
all the poems I’ve written about them or
all the poems I’ve written about them or all the poems I haven’t written about
all the poems I haven’t written about
all the poems I haven’t written about them I want to write a collection of 28
them I want to write a collection of 28
them I want to write a collection of 28 poems seven poems for each of the four
poems seven poems for each of the four
poems seven poems for each of the four women that I have loved well and though
women that I have loved well and though
women that I have loved well and though I love them all I will reserve the use
I love them all I will reserve the use
I love them all I will reserve the use of closed-form for only one of them I
of closed-form for only one of them I
of closed-form for only one of them I will write her seven Shakespearean
will write her seven Shakespearean
will write her seven Shakespearean sonnets no I will write her seven
sonnets no I will write her seven
sonnets no I will write her seven villanelles no I will write her seven
villanelles no I will write her seven
villanelles no I will write her seven epic poems written in rhyming couplets
epic poems written in rhyming couplets
epic poems written in rhyming couplets no I will write her seven powerful
no I will write her seven powerful
no I will write her seven powerful and poignant PSAs that will all end the
and poignant PSAs that will all end the
and poignant PSAs that will all end the same with three words repeating I love
same with three words repeating I love
same with three words repeating I love you I love you I love you I love you I
you I love you I love you I love you I
you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you after I
love you I love you I love you after I
love you I love you I love you after I wrote that poem an overwhelming sense of
wrote that poem an overwhelming sense of
wrote that poem an overwhelming sense of calmness fell upon me and I found myself
calmness fell upon me and I found myself
calmness fell upon me and I found myself able to forgive with greater ease after
able to forgive with greater ease after
able to forgive with greater ease after writing that poem so much so that when I
writing that poem so much so that when I
writing that poem so much so that when I received a follow-up message from my
received a follow-up message from my
received a follow-up message from my half-sister containing my father’s
half-sister containing my father’s
half-sister containing my father’s obituary and I discovered that I was not
obituary and I discovered that I was not
obituary and I discovered that I was not in it that I had been written out of my
in it that I had been written out of my
in it that I had been written out of my father’s life even in death I was not
father’s life even in death I was not
father’s life even in death I was not bitter and I was not angry
bitter and I was not angry
bitter and I was not angry yes I was hurt but I took a breath and
yes I was hurt but I took a breath and
yes I was hurt but I took a breath and in that breath I came to the realization
in that breath I came to the realization
in that breath I came to the realization that my father did not write his
that my father did not write his
that my father did not write his obituary someone else did and it was
obituary someone else did and it was
obituary someone else did and it was their omission not his so I wrote a poem
writing they’re wrong this is called the
writing they’re wrong this is called the breath of our disconnection or on
breath of our disconnection or on
breath of our disconnection or on finding out that I was left out of my
finding out that I was left out of my
finding out that I was left out of my father’s obituary he is survived by
father’s obituary he is survived by
father’s obituary he is survived by sheets soiled crimson crumpled cold on
sheets soiled crimson crumpled cold on
sheets soiled crimson crumpled cold on hospital floor survived by blood in
hospital floor survived by blood in
hospital floor survived by blood in lungs throat and mouth hair in sink by
lungs throat and mouth hair in sink by
lungs throat and mouth hair in sink by chemotherapy by diagnosis survived by
chemotherapy by diagnosis survived by
chemotherapy by diagnosis survived by pain inside and shortness of breath by
pain inside and shortness of breath by
pain inside and shortness of breath by calloused hands farm Jack come along
calloused hands farm Jack come along
calloused hands farm Jack come along whirly jig he is survived by new family
whirly jig he is survived by new family
whirly jig he is survived by new family and new priorities by Community College
and new priorities by Community College
and new priorities by Community College art classes by beautiful Brown woman by
art classes by beautiful Brown woman by
art classes by beautiful Brown woman by not so Brown boy he has survived by
not so Brown boy he has survived by
not so Brown boy he has survived by pills of different colors and sizes by
pills of different colors and sizes by
pills of different colors and sizes by PTSD by Agent Orange he has survived by
PTSD by Agent Orange he has survived by
PTSD by Agent Orange he has survived by severed limbs and wells of soldiers too
severed limbs and wells of soldiers too
severed limbs and wells of soldiers too young for death by Ho Chi Minh City unit
young for death by Ho Chi Minh City unit
young for death by Ho Chi Minh City unit Corps God and country act one of Hamlet
Corps God and country act one of Hamlet
Corps God and country act one of Hamlet by paint-by-numbers survived by amniotic
by paint-by-numbers survived by amniotic
by paint-by-numbers survived by amniotic fluid in lungs throat and mouth by
fluid in lungs throat and mouth by
fluid in lungs throat and mouth by unbuckle belt and floral print dress on
unbuckle belt and floral print dress on
unbuckle belt and floral print dress on floor board of a Chevy by young man and
floor board of a Chevy by young man and
floor board of a Chevy by young man and younger woman Swain and time in
younger woman Swain and time in
younger woman Swain and time in small-town Texas dancehall he is
small-town Texas dancehall he is
small-town Texas dancehall he is survived by I’m so lonesome I could cry
survived by I’m so lonesome I could cry
survived by I’m so lonesome I could cry playing on the jukebox
playing on the jukebox
playing on the jukebox but these poems taught me anything
but these poems taught me anything
but these poems taught me anything they taught me that yes my father did
they taught me that yes my father did
they taught me that yes my father did leave me all those years ago but I don’t
leave me all those years ago but I don’t
leave me all those years ago but I don’t think he meant to and that’s enough
think he meant to and that’s enough
think he meant to and that’s enough that’s enough to forgive him I struggled
that’s enough to forgive him I struggled
that’s enough to forgive him I struggled a great deal with the title of my new
a great deal with the title of my new
a great deal with the title of my new book originally was gonna call it causes
book originally was gonna call it causes
book originally was gonna call it causes of degradation after that first poem
of degradation after that first poem
of degradation after that first poem that I wrote that night after receiving
that I wrote that night after receiving
that I wrote that night after receiving the message but there’s a lot of fire
the message but there’s a lot of fire
the message but there’s a lot of fire imagery in the book so I was starting to
imagery in the book so I was starting to
imagery in the book so I was starting to be drawn to the word arsonist I had a
be drawn to the word arsonist I had a
be drawn to the word arsonist I had a conversation with another one of my
conversation with another one of my
conversation with another one of my professors James along Yoda Stevens
professors James along Yoda Stevens
professors James along Yoda Stevens who’s just as gentle and lovely as he is
who’s just as gentle and lovely as he is
who’s just as gentle and lovely as he is brilliant and he said to me it has to be
brilliant and he said to me it has to be
brilliant and he said to me it has to be arsonist
arsonist
arsonist it has the word Sun in it and he said it
it has the word Sun in it and he said it
it has the word Sun in it and he said it also contains the phrase our Sun is
also contains the phrase our Sun is
also contains the phrase our Sun is inside the word and then I knew that it
inside the word and then I knew that it
inside the word and then I knew that it had to be that I want to close with a
had to be that I want to close with a
had to be that I want to close with a poem that’s very near the end of the
poem that’s very near the end of the
poem that’s very near the end of the book and I think it sums up this TED
book and I think it sums up this TED
book and I think it sums up this TED talk perfectly and sums up the book that
talk perfectly and sums up the book that
talk perfectly and sums up the book that I’ve written it’s called arsonist and
I’ve written it’s called arsonist and
I’ve written it’s called arsonist and sums up maybe my entire life it’s called
sums up maybe my entire life it’s called
sums up maybe my entire life it’s called for better or worse almost a year now
what I’ve learned is this my dead father
what I’ve learned is this my dead father is not in the dirt nor is he and the
is not in the dirt nor is he and the
is not in the dirt nor is he and the poems he is in me my name is Joaquin see
poems he is in me my name is Joaquin see
poems he is in me my name is Joaquin see what the nail I’m a poet and a teacher
what the nail I’m a poet and a teacher
what the nail I’m a poet and a teacher and I am my father’s son and I have an
and I am my father’s son and I have an
and I am my father’s son and I have an idea worth spreading and that idea is
idea worth spreading and that idea is
idea worth spreading and that idea is the not so simple act of forgiveness
the not so simple act of forgiveness
the not so simple act of forgiveness thank you so very much
thank you so very much
thank you so very much [Applause]
[Applause]
[Applause] [Music]
”
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