let’s bring some everyday conversation about mental health into context
about mental health into context
about mental health into context something we all participated in more
something we all participated in more
something we all participated in more often than not is the stigmatization of
often than not is the stigmatization of
often than not is the stigmatization of mental illness that Grey’s Anatomy
mental illness that Grey’s Anatomy
mental illness that Grey’s Anatomy episode was really depressing the
episode was really depressing the
episode was really depressing the weather is so bipolar I’d rather kill
weather is so bipolar I’d rather kill
weather is so bipolar I’d rather kill myself than take that exam if these
myself than take that exam if these
myself than take that exam if these phrases are unrecognizable to you I
phrases are unrecognizable to you I
phrases are unrecognizable to you I commend you never change if you use or
commend you never change if you use or
commend you never change if you use or hear these phrases regularly I’d like to
hear these phrases regularly I’d like to
hear these phrases regularly I’d like to use this platform as a way for you to
use this platform as a way for you to
use this platform as a way for you to consider a different perspective one in
consider a different perspective one in
consider a different perspective one in four college students has a diagnosable
four college students has a diagnosable
four college students has a diagnosable mental illness and with that said the
mental illness and with that said the
mental illness and with that said the previous statements that mention mental
previous statements that mention mental
previous statements that mention mental illness inappropriately stigmatize our
illness inappropriately stigmatize our
illness inappropriately stigmatize our peers more than we realize
peers more than we realize
peers more than we realize stigma can be defined as a mark of
stigma can be defined as a mark of
stigma can be defined as a mark of disgrace associated with a particular
disgrace associated with a particular
disgrace associated with a particular person quality or circumstance to help
person quality or circumstance to help
person quality or circumstance to help illustrate this definition I have a
illustrate this definition I have a
illustrate this definition I have a story Cristina and I were friends from
story Cristina and I were friends from
story Cristina and I were friends from an extremely young age we were both
an extremely young age we were both
an extremely young age we were both outgoing constantly laughing a couple of
outgoing constantly laughing a couple of
outgoing constantly laughing a couple of goofballs who thrived off of spongebob
goofballs who thrived off of spongebob
goofballs who thrived off of spongebob based humor we were inseparable to the
based humor we were inseparable to the
based humor we were inseparable to the point of being identical her smile was
point of being identical her smile was
point of being identical her smile was contagious from a young age all the way
contagious from a young age all the way
contagious from a young age all the way through high school she was an extrovert
through high school she was an extrovert
through high school she was an extrovert she could get her hands on any
she could get her hands on any
she could get her hands on any extracurriculars that she wanted and she
extracurriculars that she wanted and she
extracurriculars that she wanted and she loved to have fun
loved to have fun
loved to have fun Cristina wrapped in her middle school
Cristina wrapped in her middle school
Cristina wrapped in her middle school talent show with brilliant lines like
talent show with brilliant lines like
talent show with brilliant lines like zebras are really nice they’re just
zebras are really nice they’re just
zebras are really nice they’re just horses with stripes
horses with stripes
horses with stripes she was captain of her JV volleyball and
she was captain of her JV volleyball and
she was captain of her JV volleyball and softball teams and was captain of her
softball teams and was captain of her
softball teams and was captain of her varsity volleyball team in later years
varsity volleyball team in later years
varsity volleyball team in later years she was junior class president student
she was junior class president student
she was junior class president student council president and was an active band
council president and was an active band
council president and was an active band geek from the ripe age of ten
geek from the ripe age of ten
geek from the ripe age of ten occasionally she’d bust out the
occasionally she’d bust out the
occasionally she’d bust out the saxophone during her varsity games and
saxophone during her varsity games and
saxophone during her varsity games and play pep band songs for the teams she
play pep band songs for the teams she
play pep band songs for the teams she was voted most school spirit every year
was voted most school spirit every year
was voted most school spirit every year since middle school painting her face
since middle school painting her face
since middle school painting her face wearing any school colored clothing that
wearing any school colored clothing that
wearing any school colored clothing that she owned and would walk the halls with
she owned and would walk the halls with
she owned and would walk the halls with pride Christina lives to embarrass
pride Christina lives to embarrass
pride Christina lives to embarrass herself for the sole purpose of
herself for the sole purpose of
herself for the sole purpose of entertainment occasionally she’d even
entertainment occasionally she’d even
entertainment occasionally she’d even wear a banana suit to school for no
wear a banana suit to school for no
wear a banana suit to school for no purpose often in hopes to make anyone
purpose often in hopes to make anyone
purpose often in hopes to make anyone who saw her smile while christina was
who saw her smile while christina was
who saw her smile while christina was goofy she was also extremely driven with
goofy she was also extremely driven with
goofy she was also extremely driven with challenging but realistic goals
challenging but realistic goals
challenging but realistic goals I watched her grow up becoming ecstatic
I watched her grow up becoming ecstatic
I watched her grow up becoming ecstatic at every new opportunity that screamed
at every new opportunity that screamed
at every new opportunity that screamed for a chance at success she was planning
for a chance at success she was planning
for a chance at success she was planning prom running concessions planning pep
prom running concessions planning pep
prom running concessions planning pep rallies taking the SAT and a CT as many
rallies taking the SAT and a CT as many
rallies taking the SAT and a CT as many times as she could she was reaching out
times as she could she was reaching out
times as she could she was reaching out for scholarships and taking as many ApS
for scholarships and taking as many ApS
for scholarships and taking as many ApS that she could fit into her schedule she
that she could fit into her schedule she
that she could fit into her schedule she was in volunteering clubs at National
was in volunteering clubs at National
was in volunteering clubs at National Honor Society graduated with an advanced
Honor Society graduated with an advanced
Honor Society graduated with an advanced Regents diploma and with a 3.9 GPA she
Regents diploma and with a 3.9 GPA she
Regents diploma and with a 3.9 GPA she saw no future other than an accomplished
saw no future other than an accomplished
saw no future other than an accomplished one she stopped at nothing to do more
one she stopped at nothing to do more
one she stopped at nothing to do more Bmore push herself more but at what cost
Bmore push herself more but at what cost
Bmore push herself more but at what cost I constantly asked Cristina at what
I constantly asked Cristina at what
I constantly asked Cristina at what point do you distinguish between
point do you distinguish between
point do you distinguish between overachieving and overcompensating was a
overachieving and overcompensating was a
overachieving and overcompensating was a battle for recognition one that handed
battle for recognition one that handed
battle for recognition one that handed my best friend a loss before she knew
my best friend a loss before she knew
my best friend a loss before she knew she was even fighting Cristina’s normal
she was even fighting Cristina’s normal
she was even fighting Cristina’s normal was an anxiety ridden panicked
was an anxiety ridden panicked
was an anxiety ridden panicked depressive self-deprecating realm of
depressive self-deprecating realm of
depressive self-deprecating realm of consistent comparison to those around
consistent comparison to those around
consistent comparison to those around her one of which was her biomedical
her one of which was her biomedical
her one of which was her biomedical engineering brother who scored a 1400
engineering brother who scored a 1400
engineering brother who scored a 1400 out of 1600 his first try on the SATs
out of 1600 his first try on the SATs
out of 1600 his first try on the SATs another was her flawless sister whose
another was her flawless sister whose
another was her flawless sister whose face in her hometown was extremely
face in her hometown was extremely
face in her hometown was extremely recognizable due to her visibility in
recognizable due to her visibility in
recognizable due to her visibility in the community as well as any additional
the community as well as any additional
the community as well as any additional number of peers
number of peers
number of peers it’s ironic because Christina had this
it’s ironic because Christina had this
it’s ironic because Christina had this these impressive grades and activity
these impressive grades and activity
these impressive grades and activity resume and a personality that
resume and a personality that
resume and a personality that demonstrated she had it all figured out
demonstrated she had it all figured out
demonstrated she had it all figured out she balance school and music and sports
she balance school and music and sports
she balance school and music and sports also well relationships with friends and
also well relationships with friends and
also well relationships with friends and family obviously not everyone in high
family obviously not everyone in high
family obviously not everyone in high school loved her like I did but they
school loved her like I did but they
school loved her like I did but they admired her for her passion and her
admired her for her passion and her
admired her for her passion and her motivation to reach for the stars not to
motivation to reach for the stars not to
motivation to reach for the stars not to mention her rapping skills without
mention her rapping skills without
mention her rapping skills without anyone noticing not even myself
anyone noticing not even myself
anyone noticing not even myself Christina fell into a downward spiral of
Christina fell into a downward spiral of
Christina fell into a downward spiral of mental illness early in her high school
mental illness early in her high school
mental illness early in her high school her sophomore year our friend group
her sophomore year our friend group
her sophomore year our friend group threw her surprise birthday party and
threw her surprise birthday party and
threw her surprise birthday party and honestly she was so surprised that she
honestly she was so surprised that she
honestly she was so surprised that she couldn’t react all of her amazing best
couldn’t react all of her amazing best
couldn’t react all of her amazing best friends were there we got her amazing
friends were there we got her amazing
friends were there we got her amazing gifts and it should have been an amazing
gifts and it should have been an amazing
gifts and it should have been an amazing time but for whatever reason christina
time but for whatever reason christina
time but for whatever reason christina was pulled down into emotional
was pulled down into emotional
was pulled down into emotional nothingness despite being in a room full
nothingness despite being in a room full
nothingness despite being in a room full of people who wanted nothing more than
of people who wanted nothing more than
of people who wanted nothing more than to celebrate her I watched Christina
to celebrate her I watched Christina
to celebrate her I watched Christina come off as petty ungrateful rude she
come off as petty ungrateful rude she
come off as petty ungrateful rude she watched her friends react with anger and
watched her friends react with anger and
watched her friends react with anger and frustration she couldn’t find the words
frustration she couldn’t find the words
frustration she couldn’t find the words to apologize for how she was acting
to apologize for how she was acting
to apologize for how she was acting apologized for depressive symptoms she
apologized for depressive symptoms she
apologized for depressive symptoms she had a lot of trouble verbalizing her
had a lot of trouble verbalizing her
had a lot of trouble verbalizing her guilt she looked at me and stuttered
guilt she looked at me and stuttered
guilt she looked at me and stuttered barely making out the words what am i
barely making out the words what am i
barely making out the words what am i what what’s going on why am i acting
what what’s going on why am i acting
what what’s going on why am i acting like this I couldn’t answer that for her
like this I couldn’t answer that for her
like this I couldn’t answer that for her she couldn’t answer that her anger was
she couldn’t answer that her anger was
she couldn’t answer that her anger was soon reciprocated into her own and at
soon reciprocated into her own and at
soon reciprocated into her own and at the age of 15 this was the first time
the age of 15 this was the first time
the age of 15 this was the first time that Christina thought about harming
that Christina thought about harming
that Christina thought about harming herself later that year she met a boy he
herself later that year she met a boy he
herself later that year she met a boy he was her sole highschool sweetheart she
was her sole highschool sweetheart she
was her sole highschool sweetheart she was head-over-heels and constantly happy
was head-over-heels and constantly happy
was head-over-heels and constantly happy from him but little did she know that he
from him but little did she know that he
from him but little did she know that he would be a great mask to her developing
would be a great mask to her developing
would be a great mask to her developing mental illness little did Daniel know
mental illness little did Daniel know
mental illness little did Daniel know that he would be one of the main outlets
that he would be one of the main outlets
that he would be one of the main outlets for her anxiety and depression the
for her anxiety and depression the
for her anxiety and depression the transition to junior year was brutal
transition to junior year was brutal
transition to junior year was brutal how many ApS were you taking how many
how many ApS were you taking how many
how many ApS were you taking how many times were you taking the SAT and a CT
times were you taking the SAT and a CT
times were you taking the SAT and a CT were you applying to college were you
were you applying to college were you
were you applying to college were you trying to find a major
trying to find a major
trying to find a major were you write in common app essays were
were you write in common app essays were
were you write in common app essays were you beginning to hold a lot more
you beginning to hold a lot more
you beginning to hold a lot more financial responsibility than you
financial responsibility than you
financial responsibility than you remember were you conscious of your
remember were you conscious of your
remember were you conscious of your mental health through all of that
mental health through all of that
mental health through all of that Christina wasn’t it all began to blow up
Christina wasn’t it all began to blow up
Christina wasn’t it all began to blow up in her face during and after ap season
in her face during and after ap season
in her face during and after ap season which in non high school terms is
which in non high school terms is
which in non high school terms is referred to as the month of May I
referred to as the month of May I
referred to as the month of May I watched as my best friend regularly
watched as my best friend regularly
watched as my best friend regularly began to excuse herself in the middle of
began to excuse herself in the middle of
began to excuse herself in the middle of class room in the middle of class excuse
class room in the middle of class excuse
class room in the middle of class excuse me
me
me but she would run to the bathroom and
but she would run to the bathroom and
but she would run to the bathroom and fear that someone might see her stop
fear that someone might see her stop
fear that someone might see her stop breathing from an anxiety attack
breathing from an anxiety attack
breathing from an anxiety attack she’d lose sight of where she was who
she’d lose sight of where she was who
she’d lose sight of where she was who she was and if she couldn’t leave
she was and if she couldn’t leave
she was and if she couldn’t leave whatever room she was in to be alone she
whatever room she was in to be alone she
whatever room she was in to be alone she believed that it would result in
believed that it would result in
believed that it would result in imminent death in that moment she told
imminent death in that moment she told
imminent death in that moment she told me stories of how every other night was
me stories of how every other night was
me stories of how every other night was a phone call crying to Daniel because
a phone call crying to Daniel because
a phone call crying to Daniel because she couldn’t figure out why she couldn’t
she couldn’t figure out why she couldn’t
she couldn’t figure out why she couldn’t sleep why she couldn’t breathe in the
sleep why she couldn’t breathe in the
sleep why she couldn’t breathe in the middle of a school day why she was
middle of a school day why she was
middle of a school day why she was constantly running on empty but actively
constantly running on empty but actively
constantly running on empty but actively chose to distract herself from that by
chose to distract herself from that by
chose to distract herself from that by doing more Daniel wasn’t giving her the
doing more Daniel wasn’t giving her the
doing more Daniel wasn’t giving her the answer she wanted the answers she needed
answer she wanted the answers she needed
answer she wanted the answers she needed the anxiety based cries for help quickly
the anxiety based cries for help quickly
the anxiety based cries for help quickly turned into fights and the distance
turned into fights and the distance
turned into fights and the distance began to develop between them the only
began to develop between them the only
began to develop between them the only other person who might have had a hint
other person who might have had a hint
other person who might have had a hint that her struggled to function normally
that her struggled to function normally
that her struggled to function normally was our psychology teacher he asked us
was our psychology teacher he asked us
was our psychology teacher he asked us to write three positives and three
to write three positives and three
to write three positives and three negatives about our personal life on a
negatives about our personal life on a
negatives about our personal life on a sheet of paper before class every day
sheet of paper before class every day
sheet of paper before class every day Christina wrote about mild self-doubt
Christina wrote about mild self-doubt
Christina wrote about mild self-doubt and ongoing anxiety but was never
and ongoing anxiety but was never
and ongoing anxiety but was never transparent enough to demonstrate any
transparent enough to demonstrate any
transparent enough to demonstrate any red flags christina thought everything
red flags christina thought everything
red flags christina thought everything that she was going through was the same
that she was going through was the same
that she was going through was the same for everyone else she and I had no
for everyone else she and I had no
for everyone else she and I had no reason to believe that her emotions were
reason to believe that her emotions were
reason to believe that her emotions were abnormal this was all we knew a pea
abnormal this was all we knew a pea
abnormal this was all we knew a pea season and prom season pasts but final
season and prom season pasts but final
season and prom season pasts but final exams were approaching after a year and
exams were approaching after a year and
exams were approaching after a year and a half Daniel dumped Christina our best
a half Daniel dumped Christina our best
a half Daniel dumped Christina our best friends were either going on an exchange
friends were either going on an exchange
friends were either going on an exchange trip that summer or working full-time
trip that summer or working full-time
trip that summer or working full-time and Christina was really falling apart
and Christina was really falling apart
and Christina was really falling apart with no way out there was seemingly no
with no way out there was seemingly no
with no way out there was seemingly no support system because on the outside
support system because on the outside
support system because on the outside christina was demonstrating little to no
christina was demonstrating little to no
christina was demonstrating little to no problems for a seventeen-year-old she
problems for a seventeen-year-old she
problems for a seventeen-year-old she had a lot going on but on those days
had a lot going on but on those days
had a lot going on but on those days that she didn’t have an anxiety attack
that she didn’t have an anxiety attack
that she didn’t have an anxiety attack or a date without a phone call crying –
or a date without a phone call crying –
or a date without a phone call crying – Daniel where the days that she had come
Daniel where the days that she had come
Daniel where the days that she had come to school wearing a crazy outfit for
to school wearing a crazy outfit for
to school wearing a crazy outfit for game day or would walk down the hall
game day or would walk down the hall
game day or would walk down the hall laughing with with friends or would find
laughing with with friends or would find
laughing with with friends or would find literally any reason to smile every time
literally any reason to smile every time
literally any reason to smile every time she’d fall into a depressive episode
she’d fall into a depressive episode
she’d fall into a depressive episode she’d pull herself right back out and
she’d pull herself right back out and
she’d pull herself right back out and forget about those emotions immediately
forget about those emotions immediately
forget about those emotions immediately after it was almost like Christina had
after it was almost like Christina had
after it was almost like Christina had built up this tolerance for pain and she
built up this tolerance for pain and she
built up this tolerance for pain and she avoided recognizing it and fear that one
avoided recognizing it and fear that one
avoided recognizing it and fear that one day she’d finally break Christina was
day she’d finally break Christina was
day she’d finally break Christina was running out of ideas for resume builders
running out of ideas for resume builders
running out of ideas for resume builders to cope with her evident anxiety and
to cope with her evident anxiety and
to cope with her evident anxiety and depression no one saw any changes in her
depression no one saw any changes in her
depression no one saw any changes in her behavior because of the activity
behavior because of the activity
behavior because of the activity activity resume the laughter goofiness
activity resume the laughter goofiness
activity resume the laughter goofiness 3.9 the banana suit all of the band-aids
3.9 the banana suit all of the band-aids
3.9 the banana suit all of the band-aids on the outside
on the outside
on the outside she was running perfectly but on the
she was running perfectly but on the
she was running perfectly but on the inside that machine was breaking down
inside that machine was breaking down
inside that machine was breaking down rapidly one day I saw she was out of gas
rapidly one day I saw she was out of gas
rapidly one day I saw she was out of gas she looked lost I looked I asked her are
she looked lost I looked I asked her are
she looked lost I looked I asked her are you okay she stared blankly back at me
you okay she stared blankly back at me
you okay she stared blankly back at me and said everything that I am what I’m
and said everything that I am what I’m
and said everything that I am what I’m doing everything I worked for it’s not
doing everything I worked for it’s not
doing everything I worked for it’s not enough the look in her eyes and the tone
enough the look in her eyes and the tone
enough the look in her eyes and the tone in her voice reminded me of that
in her voice reminded me of that
in her voice reminded me of that roadrunner in the cartoons that would
roadrunner in the cartoons that would
roadrunner in the cartoons that would run off a cliff suspend in the air
run off a cliff suspend in the air
run off a cliff suspend in the air looked down waiting for themselves to
looked down waiting for themselves to
looked down waiting for themselves to crash christina was done she felt as if
crash christina was done she felt as if
crash christina was done she felt as if no one was there as if every day was a
no one was there as if every day was a
no one was there as if every day was a blur because none of it mattered summer
blur because none of it mattered summer
blur because none of it mattered summer came and weeks went by without her
came and weeks went by without her
came and weeks went by without her ex-boyfriend christina began to develop
ex-boyfriend christina began to develop
ex-boyfriend christina began to develop a distance between her best friends her
a distance between her best friends her
a distance between her best friends her siblings and her parents after running
siblings and her parents after running
siblings and her parents after running on empty for so long christina felt like
on empty for so long christina felt like
on empty for so long christina felt like she was hardly there anymore she needed
she was hardly there anymore she needed
she was hardly there anymore she needed a way out she needed to escape christina
a way out she needed to escape christina
a way out she needed to escape christina saw that the best way out was to end it
saw that the best way out was to end it
saw that the best way out was to end it all the summer after her junior year she
all the summer after her junior year she
all the summer after her junior year she attempted to take her life her attempt
attempted to take her life her attempt
attempted to take her life her attempt was unsuccessful and she didn’t tell
was unsuccessful and she didn’t tell
was unsuccessful and she didn’t tell anyone until March of
anyone until March of
anyone until March of her senior year eight months of
her senior year eight months of
her senior year eight months of dangerously independent recovery that
dangerously independent recovery that
dangerously independent recovery that she never spoke of Christina could have
she never spoke of Christina could have
she never spoke of Christina could have faced relapse in intense anxiety attacks
faced relapse in intense anxiety attacks
faced relapse in intense anxiety attacks and more intense depression and anxiety
and more intense depression and anxiety
and more intense depression and anxiety self-harm not to mention additional
self-harm not to mention additional
self-harm not to mention additional attempts
attempts
attempts although shocked her friends and family
although shocked her friends and family
although shocked her friends and family gave unrelenting support when they heard
gave unrelenting support when they heard
gave unrelenting support when they heard the news
the news
the news christina graduated in the top 10% of
christina graduated in the top 10% of
christina graduated in the top 10% of her class christina did the absolute
her class christina did the absolute
her class christina did the absolute most to make people laugh Christina did
most to make people laugh Christina did
most to make people laugh Christina did it all but Christina’s normal was a
it all but Christina’s normal was a
it all but Christina’s normal was a self-deprecating realm of anxiety that
self-deprecating realm of anxiety that
self-deprecating realm of anxiety that brought her to believe that the best way
brought her to believe that the best way
brought her to believe that the best way out was to take herself off the earth
out was to take herself off the earth
out was to take herself off the earth christina comes from christian christian
christina comes from christian christian
christina comes from christian christian bale plays batman I love Batman I am
bale plays batman I love Batman I am
bale plays batman I love Batman I am Christina I differentiate myself from
Christina I differentiate myself from
Christina I differentiate myself from Christina because I don’t see myself as
Christina because I don’t see myself as
Christina because I don’t see myself as someone who struggles with my mental
someone who struggles with my mental
someone who struggles with my mental illness I’m someone who lives with it I
illness I’m someone who lives with it I
illness I’m someone who lives with it I engage in those personal battles but I
engage in those personal battles but I
engage in those personal battles but I do not let those battles consume me as a
do not let those battles consume me as a
do not let those battles consume me as a person anymore
person anymore
person anymore I am NOT my mental illness but I have
I am NOT my mental illness but I have
I am NOT my mental illness but I have let it define everything about me and
let it define everything about me and
let it define everything about me and that’s what makes Christina so different
that’s what makes Christina so different
that’s what makes Christina so different from the Maddy you’ve officially met I
from the Maddy you’ve officially met I
from the Maddy you’ve officially met I have had not a gray sky but no sky at
have had not a gray sky but no sky at
have had not a gray sky but no sky at all which is what Neil Hilborn describes
all which is what Neil Hilborn describes
all which is what Neil Hilborn describes it as one of my favorite poets but I
it as one of my favorite poets but I
it as one of my favorite poets but I wasn’t that kid who showed up in all
wasn’t that kid who showed up in all
wasn’t that kid who showed up in all sweats who sat in the back of the
sweats who sat in the back of the
sweats who sat in the back of the classroom who was invisible
classroom who was invisible
classroom who was invisible I didn’t under he I didn’t over II I
I didn’t under he I didn’t over II I
I didn’t under he I didn’t over II I didn’t stay in bed all day I was silly
didn’t stay in bed all day I was silly
didn’t stay in bed all day I was silly accomplished outspoken all of the
accomplished outspoken all of the
accomplished outspoken all of the supposed antitheses to what depression
supposed antitheses to what depression
supposed antitheses to what depression and anxiety are some of the stigmas
and anxiety are some of the stigmas
and anxiety are some of the stigmas remember those we’re having people
remember those we’re having people
remember those we’re having people covertly deny my mental illness because
covertly deny my mental illness because
covertly deny my mental illness because I had a non stereotypical depressive
I had a non stereotypical depressive
I had a non stereotypical depressive personality and had unhealthy but
personality and had unhealthy but
personality and had unhealthy but overachieving habits Maddy you have it
overachieving habits Maddy you have it
overachieving habits Maddy you have it all figured out Maddy you’re always so
all figured out Maddy you’re always so
all figured out Maddy you’re always so happy how do you do it I’m so jealous
happy how do you do it I’m so jealous
happy how do you do it I’m so jealous Maddy I want to be you Maddy you’re so
Maddy I want to be you Maddy you’re so
Maddy I want to be you Maddy you’re so mature beyond your years
mature beyond your years
mature beyond your years I have
I have
I have but and occasionally still do fight to
but and occasionally still do fight to
but and occasionally still do fight to find the will to live there is no face
find the will to live there is no face
find the will to live there is no face to mental illness there is no stereotype
to mental illness there is no stereotype
to mental illness there is no stereotype to mental illness and there is no one
to mental illness and there is no one
to mental illness and there is no one who should be defined by their mental
who should be defined by their mental
who should be defined by their mental illness I couldn’t see how my depression
illness I couldn’t see how my depression
illness I couldn’t see how my depression and anxiety affected me my mental
and anxiety affected me my mental
and anxiety affected me my mental illness took over me completely to a
illness took over me completely to a
illness took over me completely to a fatal point and I didn’t realize it
fatal point and I didn’t realize it
fatal point and I didn’t realize it until it was problematic I was lucky and
until it was problematic I was lucky and
until it was problematic I was lucky and I took a personal health course my
I took a personal health course my
I took a personal health course my senior year that led me to major in
senior year that led me to major in
senior year that led me to major in health education which is where I’m at
health education which is where I’m at
health education which is where I’m at now that personal health course was the
now that personal health course was the
now that personal health course was the first time I learned about mental health
first time I learned about mental health
first time I learned about mental health I would not have survived without that
I would not have survived without that
I would not have survived without that personal health course that was the
personal health course that was the
personal health course that was the first time that I learned the best way
first time that I learned the best way
first time that I learned the best way out is always through I live with my
out is always through I live with my
out is always through I live with my mental health to this day I have
mental health to this day I have
mental health to this day I have constant battles of pushing people away
constant battles of pushing people away
constant battles of pushing people away and isolating myself because I never
and isolating myself because I never
and isolating myself because I never learned how to lean on people growing up
learned how to lean on people growing up
learned how to lean on people growing up I’ve come a long way and I have caps and
I’ve come a long way and I have caps and
I’ve come a long way and I have caps and active minds and amazing friends and
active minds and amazing friends and
active minds and amazing friends and family who helped support me with
family who helped support me with
family who helped support me with whatever I need I’m in a much better
whatever I need I’m in a much better
whatever I need I’m in a much better place now but depression and anxiety are
place now but depression and anxiety are
place now but depression and anxiety are like that old friend who always asked to
like that old friend who always asked to
like that old friend who always asked to tag along and you’re just kind of like I
tag along and you’re just kind of like I
tag along and you’re just kind of like I guess there’s no escaping it but you
guess there’s no escaping it but you
guess there’s no escaping it but you don’t struggle with it you live with it
don’t struggle with it you live with it
don’t struggle with it you live with it because you’re more than your mental
because you’re more than your mental
because you’re more than your mental illness I am NOT Cristina anymore I
illness I am NOT Cristina anymore I
illness I am NOT Cristina anymore I stand on this stage today for reasons
stand on this stage today for reasons
stand on this stage today for reasons that are inexplicable to me call it fate
that are inexplicable to me call it fate
that are inexplicable to me call it fate call it a blessing from God to call it
call it a blessing from God to call it
call it a blessing from God to call it pure luck whatever it is after 21 years
pure luck whatever it is after 21 years
pure luck whatever it is after 21 years of life I am positive that I am meant to
of life I am positive that I am meant to
of life I am positive that I am meant to be here today I am positive that anyone
be here today I am positive that anyone
be here today I am positive that anyone who struggles with what I go through is
who struggles with what I go through is
who struggles with what I go through is meant to be here today I’m positive that
meant to be here today I’m positive that
meant to be here today I’m positive that you’re also some of the most courageous
you’re also some of the most courageous
you’re also some of the most courageous strongest people on this earth
strongest people on this earth
strongest people on this earth I am positive the best way out is never
I am positive the best way out is never
I am positive the best way out is never to take it all away to put yourself
to take it all away to put yourself
to take it all away to put yourself through hell because hell is all you
through hell because hell is all you
through hell because hell is all you know the best way out is to breathe even
know the best way out is to breathe even
know the best way out is to breathe even when you think you can’t even when you
when you think you can’t even when you
when you think you can’t even when you think you shouldn’t the best way out is
think you shouldn’t the best way out is
think you shouldn’t the best way out is to fight you
to fight you
to fight you mental illness you’re Christina because
mental illness you’re Christina because
mental illness you’re Christina because you’re more than a diagnosis the best
you’re more than a diagnosis the best
you’re more than a diagnosis the best way out is to feel your emotions instead
way out is to feel your emotions instead
way out is to feel your emotions instead of dodge them just to get yourself
of dodge them just to get yourself
of dodge them just to get yourself through the day your best way out is to
through the day your best way out is to
through the day your best way out is to recognize your heart is beating and
recognize your heart is beating and
recognize your heart is beating and that’s tangible evidence that you
that’s tangible evidence that you
that’s tangible evidence that you deserve to be here
deserve to be here
deserve to be here the best way out is always through thank
the best way out is always through thank
the best way out is always through thank you
you
you [Applause]
”
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