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How to Thrive in a New Normal: What Can I Do With What I Have | Matt Pond | TEDxRexburg


[Applause]

[Applause] so if someone were to offer you a chance

so if someone were to offer you a chance

so if someone were to offer you a chance of something with the odds being one to

of something with the odds being one to

of something with the odds being one to one and a quarter million would you take

one and a quarter million would you take

one and a quarter million would you take the chance those aren’t very good odds

the chance those aren’t very good odds

the chance those aren’t very good odds if you’re trying to win the lottery but

if you’re trying to win the lottery but

if you’re trying to win the lottery but if it’s brain cancer and you are there

if it’s brain cancer and you are there

if it’s brain cancer and you are there surviving 1% you’d take the chance and I

surviving 1% you’d take the chance and I

surviving 1% you’d take the chance and I did it’s true what my wife says about me

did it’s true what my wife says about me

did it’s true what my wife says about me being one in a million

being one in a million

being one in a million yeah and she does and so this is the

yeah and she does and so this is the

yeah and she does and so this is the beginning of my new normal

beginning of my new normal

beginning of my new normal now some maybe I’d just say that I’m

now some maybe I’d just say that I’m

now some maybe I’d just say that I’m lucky and in fact I am I am lucky 13 in

lucky and in fact I am I am lucky 13 in

lucky and in fact I am I am lucky 13 in a family of 14 children see that’s that

a family of 14 children see that’s that

a family of 14 children see that’s that 14 that you’re talking about yeah yeah

14 that you’re talking about yeah yeah

14 that you’re talking about yeah yeah that wasn’t our family but but yeah a

that wasn’t our family but but yeah a

that wasn’t our family but but yeah a family of 14 but my luck didn’t stop

family of 14 but my luck didn’t stop

family of 14 but my luck didn’t stop there I’ve had some great opportunities

there I’ve had some great opportunities

there I’ve had some great opportunities in my life I had opportunities to

in my life I had opportunities to

in my life I had opportunities to perform with a couple of my brothers we

perform with a couple of my brothers we

perform with a couple of my brothers we even made a few CDs and we did it

even made a few CDs and we did it

even made a few CDs and we did it professionally I was able to be on a

professionally I was able to be on a

professionally I was able to be on a national television show called this old

national television show called this old

national television show called this old house when I was listen Liz living in

house when I was listen Liz living in

house when I was listen Liz living in Massachusetts selling and installing

Massachusetts selling and installing

Massachusetts selling and installing high ended shedders I was able to have

high ended shedders I was able to have

high ended shedders I was able to have my own wood floor business and I could

my own wood floor business and I could

my own wood floor business and I could do just about anything that I put my

do just about anything that I put my

do just about anything that I put my mind to in 2006 I was 35 years old I had

mind to in 2006 I was 35 years old I had

mind to in 2006 I was 35 years old I had I was married had three small boys and

I was married had three small boys and

I was married had three small boys and and I was finishing up my bachelor’s

and I was finishing up my bachelor’s

and I was finishing up my bachelor’s degree at the local university when a

degree at the local university when a

degree at the local university when a weekend visit to the emergency room

weekend visit to the emergency room

weekend visit to the emergency room because I was having some weird spells

because I was having some weird spells

because I was having some weird spells and talking gibberish changed everything

and talking gibberish changed everything

and talking gibberish changed everything I had an exploratory surgery the next

I had an exploratory surgery the next

I had an exploratory surgery the next morning I had brain cancer it was a

morning I had brain cancer it was a

morning I had brain cancer it was a weird kind of weird kind of cancer it

weird kind of weird kind of cancer it

weird kind of weird kind of cancer it was called an olio astrocytoma Glenda

was called an olio astrocytoma Glenda

was called an olio astrocytoma Glenda Aloma mix in my left temporal lobe the

Aloma mix in my left temporal lobe the

Aloma mix in my left temporal lobe the survival rate is less than 1% after one

survival rate is less than 1% after one

survival rate is less than 1% after one year

year

year I went in for the second surgery about a

I went in for the second surgery about a

I went in for the second surgery about a month later to get as much of the tumor

month later to get as much of the tumor

month later to get as much of the tumor as they could out when I woke up from my

as they could out when I woke up from my

as they could out when I woke up from my second surgery there was a nurse in my

second surgery there was a nurse in my

second surgery there was a nurse in my room and she was holding up a letter and

room and she was holding up a letter and

room and she was holding up a letter and she says Matt do you know what this

she says Matt do you know what this

she says Matt do you know what this letter is

letter is

letter is I did not she said Matt this is an M

I did not she said Matt this is an M

I did not she said Matt this is an M your name is Matt it starts with an M at

your name is Matt it starts with an M at

your name is Matt it starts with an M at that point I was thinking it would be be

that point I was thinking it would be be

that point I was thinking it would be be a great time to learn another language

a great time to learn another language

a great time to learn another language because I did not know English my whole

because I did not know English my whole

because I did not know English my whole world changed at that point I could no

world changed at that point I could no

world changed at that point I could no longer read I couldn’t read a road sign

longer read I couldn’t read a road sign

longer read I couldn’t read a road sign to see where I was going I couldn’t read

to see where I was going I couldn’t read

to see where I was going I couldn’t read a menu at a restaurant I couldn’t read a

a menu at a restaurant I couldn’t read a

a menu at a restaurant I couldn’t read a baby book for my kids to put them to

baby book for my kids to put them to

baby book for my kids to put them to sleep it was like I was living in a

sleep it was like I was living in a

sleep it was like I was living in a different world I couldn’t write and I

different world I couldn’t write and I

different world I couldn’t write and I had a tough time expressing myself about

had a tough time expressing myself about

had a tough time expressing myself about seven months into treatment I was

seven months into treatment I was

seven months into treatment I was dealing with the beginnings of a divorce

dealing with the beginnings of a divorce

dealing with the beginnings of a divorce and a custody battle for me to even see

and a custody battle for me to even see

and a custody battle for me to even see my boys I went to my doctor and he says

my boys I went to my doctor and he says

my boys I went to my doctor and he says Matt you probably have a couple months

Matt you probably have a couple months

Matt you probably have a couple months to live I had heard those words before

to live I had heard those words before

to live I had heard those words before my oldest brother Ron 14 years earlier

my oldest brother Ron 14 years earlier

my oldest brother Ron 14 years earlier died of cancer by the time that he found

died of cancer by the time that he found

died of cancer by the time that he found it to the time that he cut died was two

it to the time that he cut died was two

it to the time that he cut died was two months they didn’t even know that the

months they didn’t even know that the

months they didn’t even know that the origin of the cancer because when and

origin of the cancer because when and

origin of the cancer because when and they found it it was everywhere my

they found it it was everywhere my

they found it it was everywhere my family didn’t want to lose another

family didn’t want to lose another

family didn’t want to lose another brother to cancer I fought I went to

brother to cancer I fought I went to

brother to cancer I fought I went to another doctor and as he was having a

another doctor and as he was having a

another doctor and as he was having a sandwich he said sorry there’s nothing I

sandwich he said sorry there’s nothing I

sandwich he said sorry there’s nothing I could do my siblings asked doctor

could do my siblings asked doctor

could do my siblings asked doctor friends to see to look at my scans and

friends to see to look at my scans and

friends to see to look at my scans and they also were like we’re sorry I was

they also were like we’re sorry I was

they also were like we’re sorry I was going downhill fast and I was felt like

going downhill fast and I was felt like

going downhill fast and I was felt like I was losing at everything

I was losing at everything

I was losing at everything in fact one night I felt like that if I

in fact one night I felt like that if I

in fact one night I felt like that if I would have died that night or if I would

would have died that night or if I would

would have died that night or if I would have slept that night

have slept that night

have slept that night I would have died no I went to a high

I would have died no I went to a high

I would have died no I went to a high school track and walked all night long

school track and walked all night long

school track and walked all night long it was like my body was was stopping it

it was like my body was was stopping it

it was like my body was was stopping it was not working right I called my mom in

was not working right I called my mom in

was not working right I called my mom in the middle of the night and said mom I

the middle of the night and said mom I

the middle of the night and said mom I don’t know how much longer I’m gonna be

don’t know how much longer I’m gonna be

don’t know how much longer I’m gonna be around about 5:00 in the morning I

around about 5:00 in the morning I

around about 5:00 in the morning I called my sister and said can you pick

called my sister and said can you pick

called my sister and said can you pick me up and take me to the emergency room

me up and take me to the emergency room

me up and take me to the emergency room just so I can get some relief three days

just so I can get some relief three days

just so I can get some relief three days later I get a call from one of my

later I get a call from one of my

later I get a call from one of my brothers it says Matt I’ve got a

brothers it says Matt I’ve got a

brothers it says Matt I’ve got a airplane ticket to Salt Lake City Utah

airplane ticket to Salt Lake City Utah

airplane ticket to Salt Lake City Utah there’s a doctor there that wants to

there’s a doctor there that wants to

there’s a doctor there that wants to meet me to be in a clinical trial option

meet me to be in a clinical trial option

meet me to be in a clinical trial option my family has been we’re looking for

my family has been we’re looking for

my family has been we’re looking for anything to save my life I was on the

anything to save my life I was on the

anything to save my life I was on the airplane that morning and that afternoon

airplane that morning and that afternoon

airplane that morning and that afternoon I was at the doctors in his office and

I was at the doctors in his office and

I was at the doctors in his office and that’s like three days after I thought

that’s like three days after I thought

that’s like three days after I thought that my life was done he said Matt he

that my life was done he said Matt he

that my life was done he said Matt he said all right if we have one more

said all right if we have one more

said all right if we have one more surgery and then could you come and see

surgery and then could you come and see

surgery and then could you come and see me every once in a while for the next 30

me every once in a while for the next 30

me every once in a while for the next 30 years I started to cry and then I said

years I started to cry and then I said

years I started to cry and then I said can we make it 50 years

can we make it 50 years

can we make it 50 years yeah well while we’re doing that I came

yeah well while we’re doing that I came

yeah well while we’re doing that I came out of my third surgery now I still had

out of my third surgery now I still had

out of my third surgery now I still had cancer but they were able to take away

cancer but they were able to take away

cancer but they were able to take away some some cysts there were I’ve been

some some cysts there were I’ve been

some some cysts there were I’ve been putting pressure on the brain

putting pressure on the brain

putting pressure on the brain I was also paralyzed on my entire right

I was also paralyzed on my entire right

I was also paralyzed on my entire right side I had a little pity party for

side I had a little pity party for

side I had a little pity party for myself for about a half hour I was I was

myself for about a half hour I was I was

myself for about a half hour I was I was upset I was thinking why is this

upset I was thinking why is this

upset I was thinking why is this happening to me and then I thought Matt

happening to me and then I thought Matt

happening to me and then I thought Matt I’m alive and I can figure this out so I

I’m alive and I can figure this out so I

I’m alive and I can figure this out so I thought what can I do with what I have

thought what can I do with what I have

thought what can I do with what I have what is my new normal going to look like

what is my new normal going to look like

what is my new normal going to look like one of the first things that I tried to

one of the first things that I tried to

one of the first things that I tried to do was to play my guitar now I had been

do was to play my guitar now I had been

do was to play my guitar now I had been playing my guitar for almost 20 years

playing my guitar for almost 20 years

playing my guitar for almost 20 years before the cancer I tried like crazy to

before the cancer I tried like crazy to

before the cancer I tried like crazy to get my right hand to even strum on the

get my right hand to even strum on the

get my right hand to even strum on the guitar but every time my thumb would

guitar but every time my thumb would

guitar but every time my thumb would fall into the strings like this my yeah

fall into the strings like this my yeah

fall into the strings like this my yeah and and then so it didn’t have any sound

and and then so it didn’t have any sound

and and then so it didn’t have any sound and so I thought what can I do with what

and so I thought what can I do with what

and so I thought what can I do with what I have and so I took my whole right side

I have and so I took my whole right side

I have and so I took my whole right side out of the equation I would practice

out of the equation I would practice

out of the equation I would practice with a captive audience of other people

with a captive audience of other people

with a captive audience of other people who were having chemo with me and I I

who were having chemo with me and I I

who were having chemo with me and I I look I learn a way to to do some things

look I learn a way to to do some things

look I learn a way to to do some things this this is my new normal

this this is my new normal

this this is my new normal this is a song that I wrote several

this is a song that I wrote several

this is a song that I wrote several years ago but even before the cancer and

years ago but even before the cancer and

years ago but even before the cancer and it’s called go fly a kite it’s helped me

it’s called go fly a kite it’s helped me

it’s called go fly a kite it’s helped me tremendously

tremendously

tremendously [Music]

like it did and if the troubles of my

like it did and if the troubles of my life

life

life I couldn’t you see the things that cared

I couldn’t you see the things that cared

I couldn’t you see the things that cared of pack up all that I was scared of and

of pack up all that I was scared of and

of pack up all that I was scared of and then with my kite I’d head out to our

then with my kite I’d head out to our

then with my kite I’d head out to our old I found the field I didn’t care

old I found the field I didn’t care

old I found the field I didn’t care about the time I needed some place to

about the time I needed some place to

about the time I needed some place to unwind where I could think about my

unwind where I could think about my

unwind where I could think about my future if I needed to I’d pray then I’d

future if I needed to I’d pray then I’d

future if I needed to I’d pray then I’d sit and watch my cares float away up in

sit and watch my cares float away up in

sit and watch my cares float away up in the air with my kites and all the hours

the air with my kites and all the hours

the air with my kites and all the hours of the day and it’s not worth it to me

of the day and it’s not worth it to me

of the day and it’s not worth it to me fighting all humanity where I’d have to

fighting all humanity where I’d have to

fighting all humanity where I’d have to plead and beg to make so if the world

plead and beg to make so if the world

plead and beg to make so if the world seems too unreal and I need some time to

seems too unreal and I need some time to

seems too unreal and I need some time to hear you you can find me with my

hear you you can find me with my

hear you you can find me with my troubles in my cut out in the field once

troubles in my cut out in the field once

troubles in my cut out in the field once I learned that I could play my guitar I

I learned that I could play my guitar I

I learned that I could play my guitar I knew that I could do just about anything

knew that I could do just about anything

knew that I could do just about anything when I am I thought I started going on

when I am I thought I started going on

when I am I thought I started going on and in doing learning how to read and

and in doing learning how to read and

and in doing learning how to read and write again and people said Matt you

write again and people said Matt you

write again and people said Matt you don’t have to do that you don’t have to

don’t have to do that you don’t have to

don’t have to do that you don’t have to read to be able to have a great life but

read to be able to have a great life but

read to be able to have a great life but to me reading was a huge benefit and a

to me reading was a huge benefit and a

to me reading was a huge benefit and a challenge for me and I was able to do it

challenge for me and I was able to do it

challenge for me and I was able to do it in fact I was even able to be able to

in fact I was even able to be able to

in fact I was even able to be able to finish my college degree I was able to

finish my college degree I was able to

finish my college degree I was able to get remarried and the odds of having

get remarried and the odds of having

get remarried and the odds of having children were also very slim I had a lot

children were also very slim I had a lot

children were also very slim I had a lot of chemo but we’ve been able to have two

of chemo but we’ve been able to have two

of chemo but we’ve been able to have two other children to add to us great family

other children to add to us great family

other children to add to us great family I was learning all kinds of things that

I was learning all kinds of things that

I was learning all kinds of things that I didn’t know that I could do like in

I didn’t know that I could do like in

I didn’t know that I could do like in making beds all right try doing that one

making beds all right try doing that one

making beds all right try doing that one time with your non-dominant hand all

time with your non-dominant hand all

time with your non-dominant hand all right

right

right I couldn’t even get out of doing the

I couldn’t even get out of doing the

I couldn’t even get out of doing the laundry all right well one of the great

laundry all right well one of the great

laundry all right well one of the great things about my wife is that she has

things about my wife is that she has

things about my wife is that she has never once thought of me as being

never once thought of me as being

never once thought of me as being disabled she believes in me and she

disabled she believes in me and she

disabled she believes in me and she doesn’t rescue me

doesn’t rescue me

doesn’t rescue me from doing hard things so when I see a

from doing hard things so when I see a

from doing hard things so when I see a chat task that needs to be done I just

chat task that needs to be done I just

chat task that needs to be done I just figure out ways that I can do it what

figure out ways that I can do it what

figure out ways that I can do it what can I do with what I have this is just a

can I do with what I have this is just a

can I do with what I have this is just a few a little clip of some other things

few a little clip of some other things

few a little clip of some other things that I’ve learned how to do this is a

that I’ve learned how to do this is a

that I’ve learned how to do this is a daily life in my new normal this is what

daily life in my new normal this is what

daily life in my new normal this is what helps me get my lawnmower started in the

helps me get my lawnmower started in the

helps me get my lawnmower started in the summertime so I just put this thing in

summertime so I just put this thing in

summertime so I just put this thing in and push it there that way I don’t have

and push it there that way I don’t have

and push it there that way I don’t have to use this other hand to pull

so I still take chant challenge I still

so I still take chant challenge I still take a challenge at things I know that I

take a challenge at things I know that I

take a challenge at things I know that I can do anything that I want but I have a

can do anything that I want but I have a

can do anything that I want but I have a question for each of you what is your

question for each of you what is your

question for each of you what is your new normal

new normal

new normal everyone here is struggling with

everyone here is struggling with

everyone here is struggling with something in their life to get it a

something in their life to get it a

something in their life to get it a little better what can you do with what

little better what can you do with what

little better what can you do with what you have with the winds of life for

you have with the winds of life for

you have with the winds of life for blowing and you don’t like where you’re

blowing and you don’t like where you’re

blowing and you don’t like where you’re going and you want to turn around and

going and you want to turn around and

going and you want to turn around and make things right

go fly kite whoa go fly a kite

go fly kite whoa go fly a kite [Music]

[Music]

[Music] thank you

”

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