[Applause]
[Music]
what is it to be a man since
always a question I ask myself who
tarnish me
what is it to be a man when I was
child I had the deep feeling that
the world in which I was not
adjusted something was not at his
square
today still when I hear them
cries of women
the crying of children the men who
kill each other I see why I say why
and if I tell myself why because at
deep in me I still have this dream
this childhood dream of a world where we can
live together united in peace and
harmony and if you’re here tonight
probably it is that you have
still maybe a little this dream
I may be shocked but the question
of equality for me is not the
subject the subject is not equality and
when we hear this debate on
equality men women
I always surprised to see
that the word that is the most important
in this debate it is the word equality
gold there are two other words men and
women
if at two different words was
maybe there is some
difference no then I could have him
answer the question what is it
to be a woman you will confess that from there
where I’m not sure that we believed then
I will try not to give a
answer but to share his
reflections that inhabits me
maybe by sharing
collectively we can move forward
I think we are not born man I
believe that it becomes I believe it
becomes by work and by a way
way sometimes long and I walked
for years I walked with
this question is what to be a man
I traveled on every continent to
the meeting of men and women
call to awaken masters
spiritual shamans jerry I
cried I was scared I screamed I
crossed areas of light
areas of intense black of all these
trips I remembered one thing
essential for me it’s finally the
way it’s not meant to go anymore
far from it is done to go
closer then yes we become a man
as time goes by and there is
many stages
several passages for that the first
at age 20 we start to build
structure at 30 the man we
begins to build his home then to
40 years old he began to build
this situation is at age 50 has
started the age the transmission and to
60 70 years preparing for final
passage there is a passage that is the most
delicate of all the most difficult
the most determining is the first this
passage from the above the man to
the man
what precedes the man enough the
boy there is a difference between
men and boys that you can ask
the question to all women
what is the difference first and foremost
tell you it’s not the same
no it’s not the same it’s a change
radical
I’m eating radical change which is
difficult painful some put
more or less time passing it
francoise dolto called it the complex
lobster why the lobster complex
because lobster actually grows up
to become an adult
but he must lose his father’s carapace
in his carapace he tells a vule the
râbles to all predators
in fragility but the world boy
to move to the state of man is
exactly that he must lose his
carapace and its shell is what but the
carapace is the maternal cocoon the
maternal matrix that secures and who
protect and so the young boy who
must become man is facing a
dilemma security protection or
difficult freedom then some
boys sometimes refuse the hurdle only
do not know where are not accompanied
because it requires to be
accompanied I will talk about it after and
so is it going to be okay what
what will happen is that they will
actually become adult boys
so what is a low adult boy
an adult boy
it looks like a dirty man’s taste of
the man it smells the man know the
after
six passengers not made the boy a
kept his carapace and this shell to
to learn a lot of forms she is going to
sophisticated it will strengthen
it’s going to be strategies that are going
use basically force or
the intellect using force and
the intellect will register in fact a
power domination logic
I make you a confidence every
power demonstrations that we
attends outside are simply
a confession of helplessness and so this boy
20 advance in life with this
pain
why this suffering because in
done inside there is a dimension
who screams who is locked up and who
can not come out as if
had the wings cut
and as if in fact a part we do not
could not express himself
What is this part that is party
This is the female part is we
the two polarities
I believe that our world is doing
west and the entire planet
now suffer from these men
boys who have not yet
completely done this passage is
why if I take the lineage
paternal on my side I have a
great-grandfather who did 14 18
when my grandfather was a kid he
did not see his big social his father
I have a grandfather who was caught in
39-40 in the war came from
captivity in 45 my father who was born
in 38 only saw his father at 8 in seven
years and so on
and that’s the story of the
planet where for so long we have
wars and men have not had
actually the male initiation that is
had to because it is good
initiation and passing of the
boy to man in all
great traditions he has his rites
initiatic in all traditions
there are six initiatory rites they have
what purpose
they have the goal actually to help this
passage of the crossing of fears we have
four big fear the fear of death or
the fear of existing it goes together
it reminds me of a shaman who bet
with his Chilean accent their going you
know there life is an adventure of which
you will not go out alive and then to
fear of madness or loss of meaning
there is the fear of freedom and fear
from isolation the initiatory rites
of passage are there to cross
fears and if we do not go through the
fear then we stay all his life
crossed by fears we all
but they go through us more or less
strongly
and today we are in a world of
fact
crossed by fears turn on the
telly the radio look everywhere we are
in fact in a nourishing world
anxiety and we feed on that
because that ‘s what we learned
and so this suffering of man one
talk about the suffering of the woman but
there is a real suffering of man
who sometimes does not even know this
suffering of man
it is related to this lack of passage
this lack of initiatory rite which has for
purpose in fact to harmonize inside
the masculine and the feminine and so I
believe that the subject is not at all
legality the subject and the
complementarity
so the complementarity is not you
kitchens and I eat no the
complementarity
it’s the association of polarities that
will generate life we are at the service
of life life pierces us
we are at the service of life and therefore
that’s the complementarity we have
found in all major
symbolic initiatory
look at the vase and the opposite
that’s the star of david look at the
ying and the yang the black contains the
white and white contains black
keep the Christian cross the
verticality and horizontality that is
feminine to the verticality that is there
the judgment the way of 2.2 from
trenches where the action is and so
we suffer from his lack of
complementarity it is in the
complementarity and
complementarity it is first to
inside everything we see at
the outside is just a projection
our interior and so I believe that
the challenge in fact is to find this
harmony this peace inside
today I have two boys of 20 and
21 years old they are exactly at this
age of the passage and my role is to
to accompany
so to answer the question
what is a man I could be
just say that I feel a man I
am a man when i can show myself
vulnerable when I can be the face
to you when I can accept to be
hated work and my senses that that
change nothing for me I am a man
when I can say I play it is a man
when I’m a man when I’m serving
to renounce renouncing is also
pronounce I know I’m a man when
I commit myself and when I am honest
sadia when I do what I say and I
say what am I doing and I am a man
when I share with you this dream
unit
because I believe that deeply the
wear all and we wear it all and we have
all want to live in this together
I want to finish by saying mithaq
houllier or yacine muta couillaud yacine
in Indian lakota that means we
are all connected
we are all united
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