Sail the Seven C’s –How to unleash your most effective self | Preston Peterson | TEDxLizardCreek

thank you so very much for letting me

thank you so very much for letting me share this time your precious time and

share this time your precious time and

share this time your precious time and be here with you I want to start by

be here with you I want to start by

be here with you I want to start by asking you a question

asking you a question

asking you a question and that question is this have you ever

and that question is this have you ever

and that question is this have you ever seriously thought about how precious

seriously thought about how precious

seriously thought about how precious little time we have on earth but

little time we have on earth but

little time we have on earth but everybody in this room has right put a

everybody in this room has right put a

everybody in this room has right put a sobering question right I mean think

sobering question right I mean think

sobering question right I mean think about it if if we’re lucky we only have

about it if if we’re lucky we only have

about it if if we’re lucky we only have several decades of life on a planet

several decades of life on a planet

several decades of life on a planet that’s been here for billions of years

that’s been here for billions of years

that’s been here for billions of years life for millions of years and if you’re

life for millions of years and if you’re

life for millions of years and if you’re like me over half of my sand is passed

like me over half of my sand is passed

like me over half of my sand is passed through the neck abag hourglass

through the neck abag hourglass

through the neck abag hourglass that’s just so profound if you stop and

that’s just so profound if you stop and

that’s just so profound if you stop and carefully consider that and yet the

carefully consider that and yet the

carefully consider that and yet the curious thing is that people they don’t

curious thing is that people they don’t

curious thing is that people they don’t live their life that way they live as

live their life that way they live as

live their life that way they live as though they have forever they’re caught

though they have forever they’re caught

though they have forever they’re caught up in the past in the future they’re

up in the past in the future they’re

up in the past in the future they’re never really in the neck of the

never really in the neck of the

never really in the neck of the hourglass all that much I find that just

hourglass all that much I find that just

hourglass all that much I find that just absolutely curious and so I’m hoping for

absolutely curious and so I’m hoping for

absolutely curious and so I’m hoping for the time that we have together we’re

the time that we have together we’re

the time that we have together we’re really gonna be focused with one another

really gonna be focused with one another

really gonna be focused with one another for just a short period of time so I’m

for just a short period of time so I’m

for just a short period of time so I’m going to tell you about a time in my

going to tell you about a time in my

going to tell you about a time in my life when I was 20 years old and I had

life when I was 20 years old and I had

life when I was 20 years old and I had just come back from seeing my father he

just come back from seeing my father he

just come back from seeing my father he was a park ranger out in California and

was a park ranger out in California and

was a park ranger out in California and I had shipped my motorcycle back to

I had shipped my motorcycle back to

I had shipped my motorcycle back to Texas I picked it up I topped it off

Texas I picked it up I topped it off

Texas I picked it up I topped it off with gas I met up with my girlfriend and

with gas I met up with my girlfriend and

with gas I met up with my girlfriend and we were gonna go see young guns to I

we were gonna go see young guns to I

we were gonna go see young guns to I don’t know if you ever saw

don’t know if you ever saw

don’t know if you ever saw young guns to our young guns maybe with

young guns to our young guns maybe with

young guns to our young guns maybe with emilio estevez oh oh my god great

emilio estevez oh oh my god great

emilio estevez oh oh my god great western if you like westerns i never did

western if you like westerns i never did

western if you like westerns i never did make it to young guns too but i was

make it to young guns too but i was

make it to young guns too but i was sitting there and we were about to go

sitting there and we were about to go

sitting there and we were about to go and i had this this incredible

and i had this this incredible

and i had this this incredible overwhelming sensation that I only had

overwhelming sensation that I only had

overwhelming sensation that I only had once in my life I’ve never had it again

once in my life I’ve never had it again

once in my life I’ve never had it again but it was this awful sick feeling like

but it was this awful sick feeling like

but it was this awful sick feeling like you should not get on this motorcycle I

you should not get on this motorcycle I

you should not get on this motorcycle I cannot describe it in words but I

cannot describe it in words but I

cannot describe it in words but I ignored it see I had no data you know I

ignored it see I had no data you know I

ignored it see I had no data you know I had no information right to suggest

had no information right to suggest

had no information right to suggest otherwise so we got on the bike and we

otherwise so we got on the bike and we

otherwise so we got on the bike and we got out on Skillman we were almost to

got out on Skillman we were almost to

got out on Skillman we were almost to the theater and over in the right in a

the theater and over in the right in a

the theater and over in the right in a parking lot there was a guy in a car and

parking lot there was a guy in a car and

parking lot there was a guy in a car and he was either gonna go back the opposite

he was either gonna go back the opposite

he was either gonna go back the opposite direction of us and where he was gonna

direction of us and where he was gonna

direction of us and where he was gonna get out on the same street that we were

get out on the same street that we were

get out on the same street that we were riding on and I was riding you know we

riding on and I was riding you know we

riding on and I was riding you know we were doing the speed limit at 45 miles

were doing the speed limit at 45 miles

were doing the speed limit at 45 miles an hour and so I counted one second two

an hour and so I counted one second two

an hour and so I counted one second two second three second he’s still right and

second three second he’s still right and

second three second he’s still right and I’d gotten off the throttle so I’d

I’d gotten off the throttle so I’d

I’d gotten off the throttle so I’d probably got no no maybe forty miles an

probably got no no maybe forty miles an

probably got no no maybe forty miles an hour right so he sees me back on the

hour right so he sees me back on the

hour right so he sees me back on the throttle right as I get back on the

throttle right as I get back on the

throttle right as I get back on the throttle he moves he hasn’t seen me and

throttle he moves he hasn’t seen me and

throttle he moves he hasn’t seen me and you want to talk about the neck of an

you want to talk about the neck of an

you want to talk about the neck of an hourglass what one grain of sand means

hourglass what one grain of sand means

hourglass what one grain of sand means he pulls out at the most you might argue

he pulls out at the most you might argue

he pulls out at the most you might argue the most inopportune time and I got one

the most inopportune time and I got one

the most inopportune time and I got one second to react one second now those

second to react one second now those

second to react one second now those that know me well will know that I can’t

that know me well will know that I can’t

that know me well will know that I can’t even chew gum at the same time I’m

even chew gum at the same time I’m

even chew gum at the same time I’m actually doing something but I would

actually doing something but I would

actually doing something but I would later in the hospital I would look at

later in the hospital I would look at

later in the hospital I would look at and write a list I mean you know what

and write a list I mean you know what

and write a list I mean you know what are you gonna do to keep your mind off

are you gonna do to keep your mind off

are you gonna do to keep your mind off the pain and everything I just write a

the pain and everything I just write a

the pain and everything I just write a list of all the conscious thoughts that

list of all the conscious thoughts that

list of all the conscious thoughts that went through my mind in that brief

went through my mind in that brief

went through my mind in that brief second it was incredible all this stuff

second it was incredible all this stuff

second it was incredible all this stuff am I gonna die am I gonna kill the

am I gonna die am I gonna kill the

am I gonna die am I gonna kill the girlfriend on the back how am I gonna

girlfriend on the back how am I gonna

girlfriend on the back how am I gonna get to my next semester I’m supposed to

get to my next semester I’m supposed to

get to my next semester I’m supposed to be there in two days am I ever gonna see

be there in two days am I ever gonna see

be there in two days am I ever gonna see my father again how am I gonna pay for

my father again how am I gonna pay for

my father again how am I gonna pay for this are they gonna think it’s my fault

this are they gonna think it’s my fault

this are they gonna think it’s my fault I’m not speeding he pulled out in front

I’m not speeding he pulled out in front

I’m not speeding he pulled out in front of me

of me

of me but there was one thought that I can

but there was one thought that I can

but there was one thought that I can remember distinctly that just came out

remember distinctly that just came out

remember distinctly that just came out in my mind more than any other you know

in my mind more than any other you know

in my mind more than any other you know what it was oh

what it was oh

what it was oh but the most hilarious part about it I

but the most hilarious part about it I

but the most hilarious part about it I remember thinking how funny this was you

remember thinking how funny this was you

remember thinking how funny this was you think of funny in just a brief second

think of funny in just a brief second

think of funny in just a brief second but literally I remember thinking how

but literally I remember thinking how

but literally I remember thinking how funny was that I’m thinking oh

funny was that I’m thinking oh

funny was that I’m thinking oh while my girlfriend is looking over my

while my girlfriend is looking over my

while my girlfriend is looking over my shoulder yelling oh loud enough for

shoulder yelling oh loud enough for

shoulder yelling oh loud enough for me to hear it you know when I was at

me to hear it you know when I was at

me to hear it you know when I was at elements on that is just extraordinary

elements on that is just extraordinary

elements on that is just extraordinary right and then in the most incredible

right and then in the most incredible

right and then in the most incredible fashion BAM we hit the front quarter

fashion BAM we hit the front quarter

fashion BAM we hit the front quarter panel of this car and oh my god at 45

panel of this car and oh my god at 45

panel of this car and oh my god at 45 miles an hour coming to a dead stop and

miles an hour coming to a dead stop and

miles an hour coming to a dead stop and metal hitting metal like that is

metal hitting metal like that is

metal hitting metal like that is excruciating it’s haunting and at four

excruciating it’s haunting and at four

excruciating it’s haunting and at four for over 1/2 mile I can still feel it

for over 1/2 mile I can still feel it

for over 1/2 mile I can still feel it today but it’s very subdued but at the

today but it’s very subdued but at the

today but it’s very subdued but at the time for years that awful crunch would

time for years that awful crunch would

time for years that awful crunch would haunt me and and and what was amazing

haunt me and and and what was amazing

haunt me and and and what was amazing though what was miraculous

though what was miraculous

though what was miraculous was my girlfriend would be thrown clear

was my girlfriend would be thrown clear

was my girlfriend would be thrown clear conscious no broken bones but she would

conscious no broken bones but she would

conscious no broken bones but she would have a nasty gash in the top of her head

have a nasty gash in the top of her head

have a nasty gash in the top of her head that would require stitches I would fly

that would require stitches I would fly

that would require stitches I would fly over the front quarter panel of the scar

over the front quarter panel of the scar

over the front quarter panel of the scar and I’d be up I’m conscious no broken

and I’d be up I’m conscious no broken

and I’d be up I’m conscious no broken bones 45 miles an hour we hit this car

bones 45 miles an hour we hit this car

bones 45 miles an hour we hit this car however when I’m up I’m on fire I’m like

however when I’m up I’m on fire I’m like

however when I’m up I’m on fire I’m like on fire and I’m telling you it does not

on fire and I’m telling you it does not

on fire and I’m telling you it does not look like you look at a cartoon or

look like you look at a cartoon or

look like you look at a cartoon or you’re you know a fire pit or a

you’re you know a fire pit or a

you’re you know a fire pit or a fireplace it’s not like that when you’re

fireplace it’s not like that when you’re

fireplace it’s not like that when you’re actually on fire I’m guessing maybe not

actually on fire I’m guessing maybe not

actually on fire I’m guessing maybe not everybody here has had that happen it’s

everybody here has had that happen it’s

everybody here has had that happen it’s kind of extraordinary commend it but

kind of extraordinary commend it but

kind of extraordinary commend it but here here I am right and there is one

here here I am right and there is one

here here I am right and there is one thought that goes through my mind what

thought that goes through my mind what

thought that goes through my mind what do you think it was stop drop and roll

do you think it was stop drop and roll

do you think it was stop drop and roll yes right the fire department are you

yes right the fire department are you

yes right the fire department are you freaking kidding me I never paid

freaking kidding me I never paid

freaking kidding me I never paid attention the fire department as a child

attention the fire department as a child

attention the fire department as a child apparently I did and thank goodness

apparently I did and thank goodness

apparently I did and thank goodness because that’s exactly what I did and I

because that’s exactly what I did and I

because that’s exactly what I did and I started rolling it rolling I rolled for

started rolling it rolling I rolled for

started rolling it rolling I rolled for what seemed like forever but what they

what seemed like forever but what they

what seemed like forever but what they should be saying is stop drop and roll

should be saying is stop drop and roll

should be saying is stop drop and roll roll roll baby and keep on rolling

roll roll baby and keep on rolling

roll roll baby and keep on rolling because when you got gasoline on 40% of

because when you got gasoline on 40% of

because when you got gasoline on 40% of your body it doesn’t go out when you

your body it doesn’t go out when you

your body it doesn’t go out when you roll so easily

roll so easily

roll so easily my girlfriend would come over and put

my girlfriend would come over and put

my girlfriend would come over and put her arm down

her arm down

her arm down on my right leg that was burned even

on my right leg that was burned even

on my right leg that was burned even worse than this to put the fire out I’m

worse than this to put the fire out I’m

worse than this to put the fire out I’m sitting in the ambulance going to the

sitting in the ambulance going to the

sitting in the ambulance going to the hospital right and we’re about to leave

hospital right and we’re about to leave

hospital right and we’re about to leave and the paramedics there and I don’t

and the paramedics there and I don’t

and the paramedics there and I don’t know I just

know I just

know I just this is where my head was I said with my

this is where my head was I said with my

this is where my head was I said with my luck I’ll die on the way to the hospital

luck I’ll die on the way to the hospital

luck I’ll die on the way to the hospital and the paramedic without missing a beat

and the paramedic without missing a beat

and the paramedic without missing a beat says with this guy driving you’re

says with this guy driving you’re

says with this guy driving you’re probably right and we just laughed

probably right and we just laughed

probably right and we just laughed we laughed guys and we laughed while the

we laughed guys and we laughed while the

we laughed guys and we laughed while the pain that I was enduring at this moment

pain that I was enduring at this moment

pain that I was enduring at this moment was excruciating I remember thinking to

was excruciating I remember thinking to

was excruciating I remember thinking to myself oh my god I’d never felt pain

myself oh my god I’d never felt pain

myself oh my god I’d never felt pain like this and they never had since and I

like this and they never had since and I

like this and they never had since and I remember thinking oh my gosh if I can

remember thinking oh my gosh if I can

remember thinking oh my gosh if I can just get the drugs it’ll be better and I

just get the drugs it’ll be better and I

just get the drugs it’ll be better and I tell you it didn’t even it paled in

tell you it didn’t even it paled in

tell you it didn’t even it paled in comparison to the pain of those

comparison to the pain of those

comparison to the pain of those scrubbies as they would debrie you know

scrubbies as they would debrie you know

scrubbies as they would debrie you know and keep the infection down three skin

and keep the infection down three skin

and keep the infection down three skin graft operations 30 days in the hospital

graft operations 30 days in the hospital

graft operations 30 days in the hospital pain like I’ve never endured in my life

pain like I’ve never endured in my life

pain like I’ve never endured in my life six months of physical rehabilitation

six months of physical rehabilitation

six months of physical rehabilitation but you know the worst pain of all was I

but you know the worst pain of all was I

but you know the worst pain of all was I became so bitter and angry at this

became so bitter and angry at this

became so bitter and angry at this individual that had pulled out in front

individual that had pulled out in front

individual that had pulled out in front of me I I looked at life and I say how

of me I I looked at life and I say how

of me I I looked at life and I say how did this happen to me I was struggling

did this happen to me I was struggling

did this happen to me I was struggling to to make it in life right that had the

to to make it in life right that had the

to to make it in life right that had the best opportunities and life here I was

best opportunities and life here I was

best opportunities and life here I was trying to make and all of a sudden this

trying to make and all of a sudden this

trying to make and all of a sudden this happens are you freaking kidding me

happens are you freaking kidding me

happens are you freaking kidding me see I’d become a victim I think guys you

see I’d become a victim I think guys you

see I’d become a victim I think guys you could you could sum up all of human

could you could sum up all of human

could you could sum up all of human history in two words challenge choice

history in two words challenge choice

history in two words challenge choice from the dawn of man to this point in

from the dawn of man to this point in

from the dawn of man to this point in time from this point in time all the way

time from this point in time all the way

time from this point in time all the way into the future for every single one of

into the future for every single one of

into the future for every single one of his challenge choice moment after moment

his challenge choice moment after moment

his challenge choice moment after moment after moment grain of sand after grain

after moment grain of sand after grain

after moment grain of sand after grain of sand that’s what it’s all about and

of sand that’s what it’s all about and

of sand that’s what it’s all about and he really only got two choices there’s

he really only got two choices there’s

he really only got two choices there’s no in-between you’re either leading in

no in-between you’re either leading in

no in-between you’re either leading in life or you’re a victim and I was

life or you’re a victim and I was

life or you’re a victim and I was squarely in victim space I plan to kill

squarely in victim space I plan to kill

squarely in victim space I plan to kill this guy it had pulled out as an

this guy it had pulled out as an

this guy it had pulled out as an accident he pulls out in front of me

accident he pulls out in front of me

accident he pulls out in front of me it’s an accident he’s a foreign national

it’s an accident he’s a foreign national

it’s an accident he’s a foreign national he doesn’t even belong in our country he

he doesn’t even belong in our country he

he doesn’t even belong in our country he doesn’t have any insurance he doesn’t

doesn’t have any insurance he doesn’t

doesn’t have any insurance he doesn’t have a driver’s license how did he even

have a driver’s license how did he even

have a driver’s license how did he even cut a car I don’t know never came to the

cut a car I don’t know never came to the

cut a car I don’t know never came to the hospital and I plan to my

hospital and I plan to my

hospital and I plan to my murder this guy and just so you know

murder this guy and just so you know

murder this guy and just so you know that obviously did not happen never had

that obviously did not happen never had

that obviously did not happen never had the horrible misfortune have to do that

but that’s where I was if you think

but that’s where I was if you think about life guys life is like a vast

about life guys life is like a vast

about life guys life is like a vast ocean that we all must cross as the

ocean that we all must cross as the

ocean that we all must cross as the captain of our ship we are either at the

captain of our ship we are either at the

captain of our ship we are either at the helm or we’re not at that point in time

helm or we’re not at that point in time

helm or we’re not at that point in time I was not at the helm of my ship and how

I was not at the helm of my ship and how

I was not at the helm of my ship and how often are we not at the helm of our ship

often are we not at the helm of our ship

often are we not at the helm of our ship not consciously present of the precious

not consciously present of the precious

not consciously present of the precious sand that’s going to the neck of our

sand that’s going to the neck of our

sand that’s going to the neck of our hourglass that’s where I was in this

hourglass that’s where I was in this

hourglass that’s where I was in this vast ocean that we must cross has

vast ocean that we must cross has

vast ocean that we must cross has countless dangers perils difficulties if

countless dangers perils difficulties if

countless dangers perils difficulties if you’ve not faced them yet I know

you’ve not faced them yet I know

you’ve not faced them yet I know everyone in this room has but if you

everyone in this room has but if you

everyone in this room has but if you haven’t just hold on it’s coming and

haven’t just hold on it’s coming and

haven’t just hold on it’s coming and more important than the actual challenge

more important than the actual challenge

more important than the actual challenge is going to be the choice of how you

is going to be the choice of how you

is going to be the choice of how you respond to it and whether or not you’re

respond to it and whether or not you’re

respond to it and whether or not you’re at the helm of your ship and what I’ve

at the helm of your ship and what I’ve

at the helm of your ship and what I’ve observed in my life and the life of

observed in my life and the life of

observed in my life and the life of those around me is that there are seven

those around me is that there are seven

those around me is that there are seven behaviors that literally come from our

behaviors that literally come from our

behaviors that literally come from our ego that that just occupy and keep us

ego that that just occupy and keep us

ego that that just occupy and keep us out of the neck of the hourglass they

out of the neck of the hourglass they

out of the neck of the hourglass they they lead to our worst self and the

they lead to our worst self and the

they lead to our worst self and the craziest thing of all is they begin with

craziest thing of all is they begin with

craziest thing of all is they begin with the letter C how stupid is that will you

the letter C how stupid is that will you

the letter C how stupid is that will you tell me let me talk to you about them

tell me let me talk to you about them

tell me let me talk to you about them competing we learn very early to compete

competing we learn very early to compete

competing we learn very early to compete in life to win at all cost in everything

in life to win at all cost in everything

in life to win at all cost in everything to include relationships are you getting

to include relationships are you getting

to include relationships are you getting me second place is first loser

me second place is first loser

me second place is first loser everything is about competition isn’t it

everything is about competition isn’t it

everything is about competition isn’t it true everything in our life we’ve taught

true everything in our life we’ve taught

true everything in our life we’ve taught that comparisons we learn to stack up

that comparisons we learn to stack up

that comparisons we learn to stack up our value and our sense of Worth against

our value and our sense of Worth against

our value and our sense of Worth against other people am I good enough do I make

other people am I good enough do I make

other people am I good enough do I make enough am i smart enough and that

enough am i smart enough and that

enough am i smart enough and that becomes the lens through which we

becomes the lens through which we

becomes the lens through which we evaluate our importance or not and then

evaluate our importance or not and then

evaluate our importance or not and then there’s chasing what are we chasing we

there’s chasing what are we chasing we

there’s chasing what are we chasing we have you ever found yourself saying

have you ever found yourself saying

have you ever found yourself saying something like I’ll be happy when X

whatever X is X happens X occurs it’s

whatever X is X happens X occurs it’s like you’re striving but never arriving

like you’re striving but never arriving

like you’re striving but never arriving you’re constantly looking for something

you’re constantly looking for something

you’re constantly looking for something else as opposed to realizing that all we

else as opposed to realizing that all we

else as opposed to realizing that all we have is the present moment none of us

have is the present moment none of us

have is the present moment none of us knows how much sand we have left none of

knows how much sand we have left none of

knows how much sand we have left none of us and then there’s controlling

us and then there’s controlling

us and then there’s controlling controlling oh my god the mother of all

controlling oh my god the mother of all

controlling oh my god the mother of all sees maybe it comes from here I don’t

sees maybe it comes from here I don’t

sees maybe it comes from here I don’t know but it’s incredible right what do

know but it’s incredible right what do

know but it’s incredible right what do we try to control who do we try to

we try to control who do we try to

we try to control who do we try to control we try to control all of life

control we try to control all of life

control we try to control all of life and all the people in our lives

and all the people in our lives

and all the people in our lives meanwhile life’s gonna do it life does

meanwhile life’s gonna do it life does

meanwhile life’s gonna do it life does we have no control people are gonna do

we have no control people are gonna do

we have no control people are gonna do what people are gonna do it’s their life

what people are gonna do it’s their life

what people are gonna do it’s their life we don’t even have control of ourselves

we don’t even have control of ourselves

we don’t even have control of ourselves I don’t even know if I’m gonna make the

I don’t even know if I’m gonna make the

I don’t even know if I’m gonna make the time live it or not I’m hoping and then

time live it or not I’m hoping and then

time live it or not I’m hoping and then there’s complaining and criticizing

there’s complaining and criticizing

there’s complaining and criticizing complaining oh my god can you find one

complaining oh my god can you find one

complaining oh my god can you find one human being on the planet that can spend

human being on the planet that can spend

human being on the planet that can spend a whole day I can’t do it i tried it

a whole day I can’t do it i tried it

a whole day I can’t do it i tried it forever I can’t do it where I’m not

forever I can’t do it where I’m not

forever I can’t do it where I’m not complaining about why life is not

complaining about why life is not

complaining about why life is not treating me fair for some stupid reason

treating me fair for some stupid reason

treating me fair for some stupid reason work criticizing oh my god criticizing

work criticizing oh my god criticizing

work criticizing oh my god criticizing it’s like you know we we sit there as

it’s like you know we we sit there as

it’s like you know we we sit there as human beings and we’re constantly

human beings and we’re constantly

human beings and we’re constantly judging and evaluating and and in

judging and evaluating and and in

judging and evaluating and and in passing verdict on everyone else around

passing verdict on everyone else around

passing verdict on everyone else around us are you freaking kidding me

us are you freaking kidding me

us are you freaking kidding me and on ourselves no us and then finally

and on ourselves no us and then finally

and on ourselves no us and then finally clinging clinging what are we clinging

clinging clinging what are we clinging

clinging clinging what are we clinging to we’re clinging to the past

to we’re clinging to the past

to we’re clinging to the past we’re clinging to knowledge to our

we’re clinging to knowledge to our

we’re clinging to knowledge to our worldview our paradigms the way we see

worldview our paradigms the way we see

worldview our paradigms the way we see it

it

it we’re clinging to others we’re clinging

we’re clinging to others we’re clinging

we’re clinging to others we’re clinging to our notion about what it means to

to our notion about what it means to

to our notion about what it means to live and to be happy we’ve got to find a

live and to be happy we’ve got to find a

live and to be happy we’ve got to find a way now that we have this important

way now that we have this important

way now that we have this important knowledge of the seas and we’re gonna

knowledge of the seas and we’re gonna

knowledge of the seas and we’re gonna see them in our lives we have to be able

see them in our lives we have to be able

see them in our lives we have to be able to have something that’s going to allow

to have something that’s going to allow

to have something that’s going to allow us to take hold of the helm of the ship

us to take hold of the helm of the ship

us to take hold of the helm of the ship because when we’re caught up in the seas

because when we’re caught up in the seas

because when we’re caught up in the seas we aren’t at the helm of our ship and I

we aren’t at the helm of our ship and I

we aren’t at the helm of our ship and I told you about stop drop and roll now I

told you about stop drop and roll now I

told you about stop drop and roll now I want to tell you about

want to tell you about

want to tell you about stop dropping me a simple phrase that

stop dropping me a simple phrase that

stop dropping me a simple phrase that you can remind yourself and become habit

you can remind yourself and become habit

you can remind yourself and become habit with when you see the cease operating in

with when you see the cease operating in

with when you see the cease operating in your life just remember that stop

your life just remember that stop

your life just remember that stop dropping me stop drop your anchor and

dropping me stop drop your anchor and

dropping me stop drop your anchor and just being be present you can focus on

just being be present you can focus on

just being be present you can focus on the breath but get curious ask yourself

the breath but get curious ask yourself

the breath but get curious ask yourself the question why why are these seas

the question why why are these seas

the question why why are these seas showing up in my life and you will

showing up in my life and you will

showing up in my life and you will create space for yourself you will

create space for yourself you will

create space for yourself you will create space to choose differently well

create space to choose differently well

create space to choose differently well what am I going to choose well that’s up

what am I going to choose well that’s up

what am I going to choose well that’s up to you it’s your life you’re the captain

to you it’s your life you’re the captain

to you it’s your life you’re the captain of your ship but I’m gonna throw some

of your ship but I’m gonna throw some

of your ship but I’m gonna throw some things at you right now that I think are

things at you right now that I think are

things at you right now that I think are absolutely worthy of consideration

absolutely worthy of consideration

absolutely worthy of consideration careful consideration instead of

careful consideration instead of

careful consideration instead of competing why not be flexible and

competing why not be flexible and

competing why not be flexible and generous flexible like the palm tree in

generous flexible like the palm tree in

generous flexible like the palm tree in the hurricane Ben don’t be like the oak

the hurricane Ben don’t be like the oak

the hurricane Ben don’t be like the oak that gets ripped up generous it’s

that gets ripped up generous it’s

that gets ripped up generous it’s incredible to me how much we have to

incredible to me how much we have to

incredible to me how much we have to give to others that cost us nothing why

give to others that cost us nothing why

give to others that cost us nothing why would you not give it to them one guy

would you not give it to them one guy

would you not give it to them one guy said to me son when time said well press

said to me son when time said well press

said to me son when time said well press on they’re not asking for it who cares

on they’re not asking for it who cares

on they’re not asking for it who cares give it to them anyway

give it to them anyway

give it to them anyway if it costs you something give it away

if it costs you something give it away

if it costs you something give it away you’re not taking it with you be

you’re not taking it with you be

you’re not taking it with you be grateful and content instead of

grateful and content instead of

grateful and content instead of comparing yourself to others assume the

comparing yourself to others assume the

comparing yourself to others assume the attitude of gratitude in all things

attitude of gratitude in all things

attitude of gratitude in all things right a gratitude list pull it out when

right a gratitude list pull it out when

right a gratitude list pull it out when you’re feeling down I swear to you in

you’re feeling down I swear to you in

you’re feeling down I swear to you in two minutes your life I mean everything

two minutes your life I mean everything

two minutes your life I mean everything will change we have so much to be

will change we have so much to be

will change we have so much to be grateful for more than kings and queens

grateful for more than kings and queens

grateful for more than kings and queens most of us 100 years ago it’s

most of us 100 years ago it’s

most of us 100 years ago it’s unbelievable if you stop and you you

unbelievable if you stop and you you

unbelievable if you stop and you you take that perspective and instead of

take that perspective and instead of

take that perspective and instead of chasing why not simplify what does that

chasing why not simplify what does that

chasing why not simplify what does that mean simplify simplify your life focus

mean simplify simplify your life focus

mean simplify simplify your life focus on only that which is most important to

on only that which is most important to

on only that which is most important to you just live your life your precious

you just live your life your precious

you just live your life your precious sand there and instead of controlling

sand there and instead of controlling

sand there and instead of controlling why not be accepting the accepting of

why not be accepting the accepting of

why not be accepting the accepting of life I spent over six months God years

life I spent over six months God years

life I spent over six months God years with futile resistance not accepting

with futile resistance not accepting

with futile resistance not accepting that I’ve been burn up in a motorcycle

that I’ve been burn up in a motorcycle

that I’ve been burn up in a motorcycle accident can you think I mean I wasted

accident can you think I mean I wasted

accident can you think I mean I wasted my sand and when you talk about

my sand and when you talk about

my sand and when you talk about accepting be accepting of other people

accepting be accepting of other people

accepting be accepting of other people all our differences accept it celebrate

all our differences accept it celebrate

all our differences accept it celebrate it

it

it accept yourself accept yourself love

accept yourself accept yourself love

accept yourself accept yourself love yourself and then instead of complaining

yourself and then instead of complaining

yourself and then instead of complaining be positive be be what positive

be positive be be what positive

be positive be be what positive psychology has shown us is the way to be

psychology has shown us is the way to be

psychology has shown us is the way to be in life for ourselves and for everyone

in life for ourselves and for everyone

in life for ourselves and for everyone around us to be happy be playful matter

around us to be happy be playful matter

around us to be happy be playful matter of fact I want to introduce you to

of fact I want to introduce you to

of fact I want to introduce you to somebody

somebody

somebody dr. Tyson would you come up here sir

dr. Tyson would you come up here sir

dr. Tyson would you come up here sir please thank you very much thank you

please thank you very much thank you

please thank you very much thank you very much dr. Tyson yes dr. Tyson I love

very much dr. Tyson yes dr. Tyson I love

very much dr. Tyson yes dr. Tyson I love this guy

this guy

this guy right I love dr. Tyson because he

right I love dr. Tyson because he

right I love dr. Tyson because he reminds me life is too short and too

reminds me life is too short and too

reminds me life is too short and too precious not to just stop and touch stop

precious not to just stop and touch stop

precious not to just stop and touch stop taking it so seriously stop stop taking

taking it so seriously stop stop taking

taking it so seriously stop stop taking everyone and everything in yourself so

everyone and everything in yourself so

everyone and everything in yourself so darn seriously to be kind to be

darn seriously to be kind to be

darn seriously to be kind to be compassionate instead of criticizing

compassionate instead of criticizing

compassionate instead of criticizing everyone around us be kind be

everyone around us be kind be

everyone around us be kind be compassionate think of a most difficult

compassionate think of a most difficult

compassionate think of a most difficult individual you’ve ever had to be around

individual you’ve ever had to be around

individual you’ve ever had to be around if you really knew their whole life

if you really knew their whole life

if you really knew their whole life story everything that had brought them

story everything that had brought them

story everything that had brought them to that point in time wouldn’t she be

to that point in time wouldn’t she be

to that point in time wouldn’t she be gentler kinder more compassionate

gentler kinder more compassionate

gentler kinder more compassionate towards them I’ve rarely found someone

towards them I’ve rarely found someone

towards them I’ve rarely found someone that disagrees with that and one guy

that disagrees with that and one guy

that disagrees with that and one guy said to me then he said well that’s

said to me then he said well that’s

said to me then he said well that’s ridiculous I can’t possibly know

ridiculous I can’t possibly know

ridiculous I can’t possibly know everyone’s story around me

everyone’s story around me

everyone’s story around me I said that’s true but you just raised

I said that’s true but you just raised

I said that’s true but you just raised your hand and said you’d be gentler

your hand and said you’d be gentler

your hand and said you’d be gentler anyway if you did so why not start there

anyway if you did so why not start there

anyway if you did so why not start there as a default position it makes logical

as a default position it makes logical

as a default position it makes logical sense to me treat everyone with kindness

sense to me treat everyone with kindness

sense to me treat everyone with kindness and compassion and instead of clinging

and compassion and instead of clinging

and compassion and instead of clinging why not just let go let go of it all let

why not just let go let go of it all let

why not just let go let go of it all let go of everything let go of the Seas

go of everything let go of the Seas

go of everything let go of the Seas choose the behaviors that are born of

choose the behaviors that are born of

choose the behaviors that are born of love here it is this is what it’s all

love here it is this is what it’s all

love here it is this is what it’s all about guys born of love guys are in the

about guys born of love guys are in the

about guys born of love guys are in the room thinking he just told me the love

room thinking he just told me the love

room thinking he just told me the love word yeah that’s exactly it it’s

word yeah that’s exactly it it’s

word yeah that’s exactly it it’s brotherly sisterly love if we are not

brotherly sisterly love if we are not

brotherly sisterly love if we are not here to make life easier for one another

here to make life easier for one another

here to make life easier for one another what in the hell are we here for

what in the hell are we here for

what in the hell are we here for seriously right you want to make every

seriously right you want to make every

seriously right you want to make every grain of sand count

grain of sand count

grain of sand count please do make sail the seven seas your

please do make sail the seven seas your

please do make sail the seven seas your bridge between past and future your

bridge between past and future your

bridge between past and future your bridge to the neck of the hourglass to

bridge to the neck of the hourglass to

bridge to the neck of the hourglass to the present moment to every grain of

the present moment to every grain of

the present moment to every grain of sand mattering make it the bridge to

sand mattering make it the bridge to

sand mattering make it the bridge to your best self your authentic self your

your best self your authentic self your

your best self your authentic self your most effective make it your bridge to

most effective make it your bridge to

most effective make it your bridge to Nelson or leadership be a leader in life

Nelson or leadership be a leader in life

Nelson or leadership be a leader in life don’t be a victim anymore you don’t have

don’t be a victim anymore you don’t have

don’t be a victim anymore you don’t have to be

to be

to be it’s your choice a moment to moment I

it’s your choice a moment to moment I

it’s your choice a moment to moment I want to tell you full circle a little

want to tell you full circle a little

want to tell you full circle a little bit more about the story when I was in

bit more about the story when I was in

bit more about the story when I was in the hospital my dad quit his job he came

the hospital my dad quit his job he came

the hospital my dad quit his job he came out to see his son and a couple days in

out to see his son and a couple days in

out to see his son and a couple days in gave me this key Jay I’ve been carrying

gave me this key Jay I’ve been carrying

gave me this key Jay I’ve been carrying that keychain in my pocket for over half

that keychain in my pocket for over half

that keychain in my pocket for over half my life and this is what it said on

my life and this is what it said on

my life and this is what it said on things will turn out all right

things will turn out all right

things will turn out all right I can’t see it anymore there’s a couple

I can’t see it anymore there’s a couple

I can’t see it anymore there’s a couple little indentations there but imagine a

little indentations there but imagine a

little indentations there but imagine a boy’s father comes to see his son I’ll

boy’s father comes to see his son I’ll

boy’s father comes to see his son I’ll burn up in the burn unit I mean he loves

burn up in the burn unit I mean he loves

burn up in the burn unit I mean he loves him to death

him to death

him to death and his his boy loves him too and he

and his his boy loves him too and he

and his his boy loves him too and he can’t do anything to make it better and

can’t do anything to make it better and

can’t do anything to make it better and he goes in that keychain

make you freakin kidding me I’d love to

make you freakin kidding me I’d love to be able to sit there to tell you that I

be able to sit there to tell you that I

be able to sit there to tell you that I looked at that I said dad oh my god that

looked at that I said dad oh my god that

looked at that I said dad oh my god that wisdom will carry me through the pain

wisdom will carry me through the pain

wisdom will carry me through the pain the pain of life the ups and downs and

the pain of life the ups and downs and

the pain of life the ups and downs and everything it’ll be awesome

everything it’ll be awesome

everything it’ll be awesome but I said something more along the

but I said something more along the

but I said something more along the lines are you effing kidding me that’s

lines are you effing kidding me that’s

lines are you effing kidding me that’s what you got for me right now get me

what you got for me right now get me

what you got for me right now get me some more frickin pain medicine but

some more frickin pain medicine but

some more frickin pain medicine but isn’t it true guys isn’t it true that in

isn’t it true guys isn’t it true that in

isn’t it true guys isn’t it true that in fact life that is how it works in time

fact life that is how it works in time

fact life that is how it works in time things will turn out alright it always

things will turn out alright it always

things will turn out alright it always does it always does

does it always does

does it always does how do I know that here’s here’s why I

how do I know that here’s here’s why I

how do I know that here’s here’s why I know that I would have never had this

know that I would have never had this

know that I would have never had this beautiful family my gorgeous wonderful

beautiful family my gorgeous wonderful

beautiful family my gorgeous wonderful soulmate my wife Kim who is every bit

soulmate my wife Kim who is every bit

soulmate my wife Kim who is every bit part of this my three boys who I can’t

part of this my three boys who I can’t

part of this my three boys who I can’t stop clinging to the news flash I’m okay

stop clinging to the news flash I’m okay

stop clinging to the news flash I’m okay if I don’t see you guys I don’t I don’t

if I don’t see you guys I don’t I don’t

if I don’t see you guys I don’t I don’t want that but if I never saw you again

want that but if I never saw you again

want that but if I never saw you again it would be okay but I can’t stop

it would be okay but I can’t stop

it would be okay but I can’t stop clinging to that but I’m so grateful to

clinging to that but I’m so grateful to

clinging to that but I’m so grateful to have had this time with you I really

have had this time with you I really

have had this time with you I really mean that from the bottom my heart and I

mean that from the bottom my heart and I

mean that from the bottom my heart and I would love to get to know you on a

would love to get to know you on a

would love to get to know you on a deeper level I really really mean that

deeper level I really really mean that

deeper level I really really mean that sincerely I’m so grateful to have been

sincerely I’m so grateful to have been

sincerely I’m so grateful to have been burn up in a motorcycle accident I was

burn up in a motorcycle accident I was

burn up in a motorcycle accident I was burned alive guys that was part of the

burned alive guys that was part of the

burned alive guys that was part of the life my sand did not stop there I don’t

life my sand did not stop there I don’t

life my sand did not stop there I don’t know when it’s gonna stop but I

know when it’s gonna stop but I

know when it’s gonna stop but I encourage you to live every single

encourage you to live every single

encourage you to live every single moment to its fullest and I want to say

moment to its fullest and I want to say

moment to its fullest and I want to say thank you than the bottom of my heart

thank you than the bottom of my heart

thank you than the bottom of my heart [Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause] [Music]