to dare meetings
Why
People say they come in three ways
for your life
first, for a very specific reason
second, for a certain
third period for the rest
maybe you know your life
already which category the person
they are now just to my left
but sits what about the person to
How many times do we leave your right
sympathetic and exciting people
Unseen, we pass the view
then rigidly on our smartphone dishes
somehow the whole time in ours
own world lost as often miss
we stories these people in
wear themselves and how many times the chance
a real encounter be it from one
yet unknown reason or with a
people of long time
accompany and support or
but for the rest of his life
one side remains
we humans are social beings
marine animals we like society
We both notice that in our work
is always part of my job
the psychotherapy come to me
people stuck in the crisis
but next to the concrete services
The psychotherapy offers it
something else helps and mine
opinion, it was sometimes even the
decisive
it’s what’s asking for something
is curious and above all does one thing
Appreciated came a few years ago
a young patient to me
she was just depressed she had none
energy she had no elan
she could not sleep she doubted
in itself and your life
but after a few talks
she felt much better
she became more active they went back in
their sports clubs and their mood
got better
I asked her what is it
helps so long we are still working
not together
and she said it feels like that
someone there for me is someone who is mine
listen and the impression that I am
Maybe we are okay in ours
we dedicate ourselves to one another
Science explores what life is
makes liveability
we arrange seminars together
lectures for a project by the
always with the life satisfaction
and to deal with the well-being or
just the luck and also because we realize
the influence of the community always completely
clearly at the beginning of our
events when it says
Psychotherapist is and happiness is only
times all brand new and expectant but with
the time is quite wonderful
A completely different atmosphere becomes a whole
little bit becomes familiar from afar
neighborhood
Of course these are only very short
moments but there are not moments
that make our lives so special and
in sum, it’s not the moments that
make the big picture
and that shows exactly one for 75 years
ongoing studies
the grand study of the uni harvard her
shows what really matters in life
real relationships
but how they arise we need
real relationships and there it can
It may well be that we are this person first
met yesterday because if
we have a sofa in the sixth floor
then it does not really matter
how many friends we have on facebook
know it depends on who we are
really know and who really willing
is to help us and it depends
who is actually standing in front of our door
and yes that can be someone we
just got to know you yesterday
that’s a real relationship and closer too
this can arise between people
Only very briefly know that shows one
another incredibly exciting study of
Two psychologist affaires asked
completely unknown people later
no, the 36 questions he had worked out
to ask and then should
these two lasted four minutes
to look in the eyes in silence
I found this experiment so exciting
that I have done this myself many times
I often tried on the safe
side of the leader once but also
sat on the experimental rabbit side there
So I am an unknown person
opposite and ask her how to ask
what is your best memory of what
would you really like to do it once
but you just do not know when you have that
cried last time
alone or in front of another person
then we looked at each other for a long time
four minutes in the eye
I often miss it very hard
eye contact with other people
build
let alone to keep it I trust
me and what followed was the most intense
what I’m going to do until then
by the way, and that’s exactly what you’re reporting
everyone else at this one too
had participated in the experiment
I really advise everyone exactly that
try it once
It’s best to go here today
afterwards in the foyer with one of you up
sympathetic persons
Look in the eye longer than it does
might do otherwise
Ask yourself because our brain
needs community if we
Welcome when we are affection
Rinse when we notice someone
really really sounds then
explodes our brain reward system
formally no matter if serotonin oxytocin
or dopamine flood all
put our bodies and one like that
incredible elation when we look
Surrounded by people who do us good
but how can we do it in a world
is very turbulent and constantly
changed our view of time
sit up and our smartphone
look directly at how can
we stress and hectic times for one
minute and forget us all on the
engage other
we can go soft in ourselves
put
we can practice curious and
interested in approaching others and
not equally so appreciative or in
Categories think I want
Do not philosophize about it that much
but I want to do that here now
with you
I want to invite you to one
to let in a short experiment and to do so
ye closes not much to do
just the eyes
sit down comfortably and take a deep breath
and think of a happy one
moment and let yourself in on him
allowed her this moment of
joy and well-being and enjoy it
what you are happy and safe
feel
Now think of a man of the
close it is just imagine him
and what you fear about him is what you feel
connectedness and wish him that he
also happy safe and free from
Danger is just like you
Now think of a man of the
you are not indifferent to either
especially positive yet negative
thoughts connect
Include him in your good ones too
I wish you a better time
happy safe and free from danger
be just like you
do not think of a human you do not
Do you like this man ?
its limits and needs
also meet him benevolently
I also like to be happy and safe
be free from danger
just like you
Now think of all together to the
people the ones you like to which you
are neutral and those who are
only from service oriented once all
good wishes to them also that
even then a deep one
breath open the eyes again and
come back here
sometimes we do not know why
or how long a human lives
but only occurs if we have the courage
to allow real encounter
then this fireworks arises in
our brains and in our hearts and
just so the chance of being a real and
true relationship valuable
acquaintances true friendship and
love
What are we waiting for
[Applause]
”
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