the problem for me is that when I make good eye contact and I’m really locked
good eye contact and I’m really locked
good eye contact and I’m really locked in on the other person’s eyes I get this
in on the other person’s eyes I get this
in on the other person’s eyes I get this weird sense of vertigo and it’s hard for
weird sense of vertigo and it’s hard for
weird sense of vertigo and it’s hard for me to break my gaze it makes me very
me to break my gaze it makes me very
me to break my gaze it makes me very uncomfortable
uncomfortable
uncomfortable so my question is how can I improve my
so my question is how can I improve my
so my question is how can I improve my eye contact without feeling awkward we
eye contact without feeling awkward we
eye contact without feeling awkward we decided to do an experiment in my house
decided to do an experiment in my house
decided to do an experiment in my house this is a machine that tracks everything
this is a machine that tracks everything
this is a machine that tracks everything that I look at see look now I’m about to
that I look at see look now I’m about to
that I look at see look now I’m about to meet somebody for the first time will I
meet somebody for the first time will I
meet somebody for the first time will I be able to make eye contact or will I
be able to make eye contact or will I
be able to make eye contact or will I fail Matt please come into my workshop
Hey hi David nice to meet you nice to
Hey hi David nice to meet you nice to meet you the person I was trying to look
meet you the person I was trying to look
meet you the person I was trying to look at here is Matt Peterson a neuroscience
at here is Matt Peterson a neuroscience
at here is Matt Peterson a neuroscience PhD who specializes in facial
PhD who specializes in facial
PhD who specializes in facial recognition and eye movements things I
recognition and eye movements things I
recognition and eye movements things I am not good at now we’re gonna review
am not good at now we’re gonna review
am not good at now we’re gonna review the footage of my eye movements when
the footage of my eye movements when
the footage of my eye movements when Matt and I first met let’s go ahead and
Matt and I first met let’s go ahead and
Matt and I first met let’s go ahead and look at this and see here I come up oh
look at this and see here I come up oh
look at this and see here I come up oh yeah see so you kind of went to my
yeah see so you kind of went to my
yeah see so you kind of went to my shoulders and then up right around my
shoulders and then up right around my
shoulders and then up right around my mouth well I mean wait why did I look at
mouth well I mean wait why did I look at
mouth well I mean wait why did I look at that it’s almost like you avoided almost
that it’s almost like you avoided almost
that it’s almost like you avoided almost my face all together oh there you are
my face all together oh there you are
my face all together oh there you are do you know why I’m looking at you now
do you know why I’m looking at you now
do you know why I’m looking at you now right now we’re having a conversation
right now we’re having a conversation
right now we’re having a conversation yeah boom eyes mouth I’m all over you
yeah boom eyes mouth I’m all over you
yeah boom eyes mouth I’m all over you you’re making the classic would have
you’re making the classic would have
you’re making the classic would have spelled the T pattern a lot people when
spelled the T pattern a lot people when
spelled the T pattern a lot people when they’re engaging with somebody’s they go
they’re engaging with somebody’s they go
they’re engaging with somebody’s they go from eye to eye and then sometimes
from eye to eye and then sometimes
from eye to eye and then sometimes they’ll go down to the mouth on average
they’ll go down to the mouth on average
they’ll go down to the mouth on average usually where people look is where most
usually where people look is where most
usually where people look is where most people don’t expect actually so most
people don’t expect actually so most
people don’t expect actually so most people think that they look directly at
people think that they look directly at
people think that they look directly at the eyes or the mouth for instance are
the eyes or the mouth for instance are
the eyes or the mouth for instance are you telling me that’s not where they’re
you telling me that’s not where they’re
you telling me that’s not where they’re supposed to look that’s what I’m telling
supposed to look that’s what I’m telling
supposed to look that’s what I’m telling you thank you Jesus
you thank you Jesus
you thank you Jesus I don’t need to make eye contact I’m
I don’t need to make eye contact I’m
I don’t need to make eye contact I’m liberated I don’t have to be polite
liberated I don’t have to be polite
liberated I don’t have to be polite where do they look the first place they
where do they look the first place they
where do they look the first place they look is towards the middle of the face
look is towards the middle of the face
look is towards the middle of the face and actually a little bit down below the
and actually a little bit down below the
and actually a little bit down below the eyes about halfway between the eyes and
eyes about halfway between the eyes and
eyes about halfway between the eyes and the nose tip seems kind of a weird place
the nose tip seems kind of a weird place
the nose tip seems kind of a weird place because there’s nothing really there I
because there’s nothing really there I
because there’s nothing really there I mean on me of course I have a computer
mean on me of course I have a computer
mean on me of course I have a computer right there right on you you know I I
right there right on you you know I I
right there right on you you know I I don’t have there I know why because
don’t have there I know why because
don’t have there I know why because people hate making eye contact
people hate making eye contact
people hate making eye contact that’s one hypothesis I think my issue
that’s one hypothesis I think my issue
that’s one hypothesis I think my issue with eye contact sometimes was I was
with eye contact sometimes was I was
with eye contact sometimes was I was like make a good eye contact use both
like make a good eye contact use both
like make a good eye contact use both your eyes to look at both of their eyes
your eyes to look at both of their eyes
your eyes to look at both of their eyes and I would have that feeling like oh my
and I would have that feeling like oh my
and I would have that feeling like oh my god I’m falling into his dreamy blue
god I’m falling into his dreamy blue
god I’m falling into his dreamy blue eyes why do I get freaked out when I
eyes why do I get freaked out when I
eyes why do I get freaked out when I look into somebody’s eyes and I feel
look into somebody’s eyes and I feel
look into somebody’s eyes and I feel like I can’t break away for that I mean
like I can’t break away for that I mean
like I can’t break away for that I mean I would basically have to go into
I would basically have to go into
I would basically have to go into collisions right this is a safe space
collisions right this is a safe space
collisions right this is a safe space for speculation it might be that for
for speculation it might be that for
for speculation it might be that for instance your amygdala might be slightly
instance your amygdala might be slightly
instance your amygdala might be slightly overactive amygdala is a small cluster
overactive amygdala is a small cluster
overactive amygdala is a small cluster of neurons deep in your brain that’s
of neurons deep in your brain that’s
of neurons deep in your brain that’s basically like the emotional center of
basically like the emotional center of
basically like the emotional center of your brain and here’s what’s interesting
your brain and here’s what’s interesting
your brain and here’s what’s interesting direct eye contact stimulates the
direct eye contact stimulates the
direct eye contact stimulates the amygdala this is one of the reasons why
amygdala this is one of the reasons why
amygdala this is one of the reasons why I contact can be so emotionally heavy
I contact can be so emotionally heavy
I contact can be so emotionally heavy whether it’s feelings of intimacy or
whether it’s feelings of intimacy or
whether it’s feelings of intimacy or feelings of like threat
feelings of like threat
feelings of like threat I find the act of meeting someone itself
I find the act of meeting someone itself
I find the act of meeting someone itself kind of over stimulating essentially the
kind of over stimulating essentially the
kind of over stimulating essentially the brain structures which are usually
brain structures which are usually
brain structures which are usually responsible for drawing people’s
responsible for drawing people’s
responsible for drawing people’s attention to the eyes are now causing
attention to the eyes are now causing
attention to the eyes are now causing some form of anxiety and yeah yeah which
some form of anxiety and yeah yeah which
some form of anxiety and yeah yeah which are now driving your eye moments
are now driving your eye moments
are now driving your eye moments downward okay so all the haters out
downward okay so all the haters out
downward okay so all the haters out there it’s not that I’m a jerk I just
there it’s not that I’m a jerk I just
there it’s not that I’m a jerk I just may have a hyperactive amygdala how can
may have a hyperactive amygdala how can
may have a hyperactive amygdala how can I get better at that cuz I want to be
I get better at that cuz I want to be
I get better at that cuz I want to be like this great to meet you I’m David
like this great to meet you I’m David
like this great to meet you I’m David Rees and when we print out the data I’m
Rees and when we print out the data I’m
Rees and when we print out the data I’m like you can’t say I wasn’t I nailed my
like you can’t say I wasn’t I nailed my
like you can’t say I wasn’t I nailed my eye contact I nailed my heart rate I
eye contact I nailed my heart rate I
eye contact I nailed my heart rate I nailed my amygdala I don’t know if you
nailed my amygdala I don’t know if you
nailed my amygdala I don’t know if you have a dog or I’ve had dogs uh no I do
have a dog or I’ve had dogs uh no I do
have a dog or I’ve had dogs uh no I do not cohabitate with animals well if you
not cohabitate with animals well if you
not cohabitate with animals well if you did what you would notice is that to
did what you would notice is that to
did what you would notice is that to make great eye contact really they look
make great eye contact really they look
make great eye contact really they look at you look up at the face and they can
at you look up at the face and they can
at you look up at the face and they can recognize faces very well human face I’m
recognize faces very well human face I’m
recognize faces very well human face I’m going to practice eye contact with a dog
going to practice eye contact with a dog
going to practice eye contact with a dog there it is
there it is
there it is so I borrowed my friend’s dog to
so I borrowed my friend’s dog to
so I borrowed my friend’s dog to practice some eye contact trying to do a
practice some eye contact trying to do a
practice some eye contact trying to do a segment on a high contact look in my
segment on a high contact look in my
segment on a high contact look in my eyes that’s a burn and I think this dog
eyes that’s a burn and I think this dog
eyes that’s a burn and I think this dog has a hyperactive amygdala
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