SUCCESS IS EASY – A Must Listen – Motivational Speech for Success In Life

in the military they give medals to

in the military they give medals to people who are willing to sacrifice

people who are willing to sacrifice

people who are willing to sacrifice themselves that others may gain in

themselves that others may gain in

themselves that others may gain in business we give bonuses to people who

business we give bonuses to people who

business we give bonuses to people who are willing to sacrifice others so that

are willing to sacrifice others so that

are willing to sacrifice others so that we may gain we have it backwards

we may gain we have it backwards

we may gain we have it backwards wouldn’t you like to work in an

wouldn’t you like to work in an

wouldn’t you like to work in an organization in which you have the

organization in which you have the

organization in which you have the absolute confidence the absolute

absolute confidence the absolute

absolute confidence the absolute knowledge that other people that you may

knowledge that other people that you may

knowledge that other people that you may or may not know who work in the same

or may not know who work in the same

or may not know who work in the same organization as you would be willing to

organization as you would be willing to

organization as you would be willing to sacrifice themselves so that you may

sacrifice themselves so that you may

sacrifice themselves so that you may survive and in and we’re not talking

survive and in and we’re not talking

survive and in and we’re not talking about giving your life I mean we don’t

about giving your life I mean we don’t

about giving your life I mean we don’t even like to give a credit you know so

even like to give a credit you know so

even like to give a credit you know so where do people like Johnny Bravo come

where do people like Johnny Bravo come

where do people like Johnny Bravo come from well it’s an age-old question

from well it’s an age-old question

from well it’s an age-old question they’re not born they’re actually made

they’re not born they’re actually made

they’re not born they’re actually made if you look at the human animal the

if you look at the human animal the

if you look at the human animal the human animal is like a machine there are

human animal is like a machine there are

human animal is like a machine there are systems inside our bodies that are

systems inside our bodies that are

systems inside our bodies that are trying to get us to do things that are

trying to get us to do things that are

trying to get us to do things that are in the interests of the survival of the

in the interests of the survival of the

in the interests of the survival of the human animal right just like in an

human animal right just like in an

human animal right just like in an industry in a business and the company

industry in a business and the company

industry in a business and the company if you want people to do something you

if you want people to do something you

if you want people to do something you offer them some sort of positive or

offer them some sort of positive or

offer them some sort of positive or negative incentive to direct the

negative incentive to direct the

negative incentive to direct the behavior right so if you want people to

behavior right so if you want people to

behavior right so if you want people to achieve a certain goal you offer them a

achieve a certain goal you offer them a

achieve a certain goal you offer them a bonus if they achieve that goal and

bonus if they achieve that goal and

bonus if they achieve that goal and they’ll work towards that goal because

they’ll work towards that goal because

they’ll work towards that goal because they want the bonus it’s a very simple

they want the bonus it’s a very simple

they want the bonus it’s a very simple system the human body works exactly the

system the human body works exactly the

system the human body works exactly the same way it works exactly the same way

same way it works exactly the same way

same way it works exactly the same way inside our bodies are chemicals that are

inside our bodies are chemicals that are

inside our bodies are chemicals that are trying to get us to do things that are

trying to get us to do things that are

trying to get us to do things that are in the best interest of us if you’ve

in the best interest of us if you’ve

in the best interest of us if you’ve ever had a feeling of happiness pride

ever had a feeling of happiness pride

ever had a feeling of happiness pride joy love fulfillment all of these

joy love fulfillment all of these

joy love fulfillment all of these feelings that we have are chemically

feelings that we have are chemically

feelings that we have are chemically produced feelings and they’re produced

produced feelings and they’re produced

produced feelings and they’re produced by four chemicals predominantly these

by four chemicals predominantly these

by four chemicals predominantly these are the basically responsible for all of

are the basically responsible for all of

are the basically responsible for all of the feelings that I would generically

the feelings that I would generically

the feelings that I would generically call happiness they are endorphins

call happiness they are endorphins

call happiness they are endorphins dopamine serotonin and oxytocin ed so

dopamine serotonin and oxytocin ed so

dopamine serotonin and oxytocin ed so [Music]

[Music]

[Music] these two chemicals endorphins and

these two chemicals endorphins and

these two chemicals endorphins and dopamine I like to call these the

dopamine I like to call these the

dopamine I like to call these the selfish chemicals but you don’t really

selfish chemicals but you don’t really

selfish chemicals but you don’t really need anybody’s help to get them right

need anybody’s help to get them right

need anybody’s help to get them right let me tell you let me tell you a little

let me tell you let me tell you a little

let me tell you let me tell you a little bit about what they are endorphins

bit about what they are endorphins

bit about what they are endorphins endorphins are designed to do one thing

endorphins are designed to do one thing

endorphins are designed to do one thing and one thing only masks physical pain

and one thing only masks physical pain

and one thing only masks physical pain that’s it that’s what they do if you if

that’s it that’s what they do if you if

that’s it that’s what they do if you if you’re a runner if you’ve ever gone and

you’re a runner if you’ve ever gone and

you’re a runner if you’ve ever gone and done a heavy exercise you’ve heard of an

done a heavy exercise you’ve heard of an

done a heavy exercise you’ve heard of an endorphin rush or a runner’s high

endorphin rush or a runner’s high

endorphin rush or a runner’s high basically what’s happening is when that

basically what’s happening is when that

basically what’s happening is when that runners out there pushing their bodies

runners out there pushing their bodies

runners out there pushing their bodies harder than they’ve ever pushed before

harder than they’ve ever pushed before

harder than they’ve ever pushed before they feel good and when they’re done

they feel good and when they’re done

they feel good and when they’re done with their run they feel fantastic and

with their run they feel fantastic and

with their run they feel fantastic and then an hour later they’re in pain for

then an hour later they’re in pain for

then an hour later they’re in pain for damage they cause their muscles an hour

damage they cause their muscles an hour

damage they cause their muscles an hour before right this is what endorphins are

before right this is what endorphins are

before right this is what endorphins are designed to do they’re designed to mask

designed to do they’re designed to mask

designed to do they’re designed to mask physical pain the caveman reason for

physical pain the caveman reason for

physical pain the caveman reason for this stuff because this stuff is all

this stuff because this stuff is all

this stuff because this stuff is all from 50,000 years ago understand homo

from 50,000 years ago understand homo

from 50,000 years ago understand homo sapien existed at the same time as other

sapien existed at the same time as other

sapien existed at the same time as other hominid species and yet we survived and

hominid species and yet we survived and

hominid species and yet we survived and they didn’t what is it about this

they didn’t what is it about this

they didn’t what is it about this species that’s so good at survival and

species that’s so good at survival and

species that’s so good at survival and thriving look at the world we’ve built

thriving look at the world we’ve built

thriving look at the world we’ve built it’s not just that we’re smart we’re

it’s not just that we’re smart we’re

it’s not just that we’re smart we’re certainly not the strongest we’re

certainly not the strongest we’re

certainly not the strongest we’re certainly not the smartest it’s that so

certainly not the smartest it’s that so

certainly not the smartest it’s that so we’re social animals we have to do

we’re social animals we have to do

we’re social animals we have to do things together together we have to look

things together together we have to look

things together together we have to look after each other and we have to work

after each other and we have to work

after each other and we have to work together to ensure that we survive that

together to ensure that we survive that

together to ensure that we survive that we do well this is how we’re designed

we do well this is how we’re designed

we do well this is how we’re designed right these chemicals are trying to make

right these chemicals are trying to make

right these chemicals are trying to make that happen

that happen

that happen so in these caveman times 50,000 years

so in these caveman times 50,000 years

so in these caveman times 50,000 years ago Paleolithic era

ago Paleolithic era

ago Paleolithic era we had to eat we’re not the strongest

we had to eat we’re not the strongest

we had to eat we’re not the strongest we’re not the fastest but there’s one

we’re not the fastest but there’s one

we’re not the fastest but there’s one thing that the human animal is made for

thing that the human animal is made for

thing that the human animal is made for endurance we could track an animal for

endurance we could track an animal for

endurance we could track an animal for hours and hours and hours and miles and

hours and hours and hours and miles and

hours and hours and hours and miles and miles and miles and if we were tired

miles and miles and if we were tired

miles and miles and if we were tired we’d keep going and if we got injured or

we’d keep going and if we got injured or

we’d keep going and if we got injured or we had to bring the food back to the

we had to bring the food back to the

we had to bring the food back to the cave we’d continue to do it and it was

cave we’d continue to do it and it was

cave we’d continue to do it and it was so good it felt so good that maybe we’d

so good it felt so good that maybe we’d

so good it felt so good that maybe we’d even volunteer to go hunting the next

even volunteer to go hunting the next

even volunteer to go hunting the next day just like we get addicted to

day just like we get addicted to

day just like we get addicted to exercise right oh my god it was so much

exercise right oh my god it was so much

exercise right oh my god it was so much fun yesterday I will totally go hunting

fun yesterday I will totally go hunting

fun yesterday I will totally go hunting tomorrow right good system for the

tomorrow right good system for the

tomorrow right good system for the survival of the group good system by the

survival of the group good system by the

survival of the group good system by the way the reason laughing feels good is

way the reason laughing feels good is

way the reason laughing feels good is because of endorphins you’re actually

because of endorphins you’re actually

because of endorphins you’re actually convulsing your internal organs and

convulsing your internal organs and

convulsing your internal organs and endorphins are masking the physical pain

endorphins are masking the physical pain

endorphins are masking the physical pain I’m sure everybody here has laughed so

I’m sure everybody here has laughed so

I’m sure everybody here has laughed so much

much

much that the endorphins eventually run out

that the endorphins eventually run out

that the endorphins eventually run out you go stop stop it hurts endorphins

you go stop stop it hurts endorphins

you go stop stop it hurts endorphins they feel good dopamine dopamine is the

they feel good dopamine dopamine is the

they feel good dopamine dopamine is the feeling that you found something you’re

feeling that you found something you’re

feeling that you found something you’re looking for or do you accomplish

looking for or do you accomplish

looking for or do you accomplish something you set out to accomplish so

something you set out to accomplish so

something you set out to accomplish so you know that feeling you get when you

you know that feeling you get when you

you know that feeling you get when you cross something off your to-do list

cross something off your to-do list

cross something off your to-do list that’s dopamine feels awesome you know

that’s dopamine feels awesome you know

that’s dopamine feels awesome you know when you when you have a goal to hit and

when you when you have a goal to hit and

when you when you have a goal to hit and you achieve that goal you’re like yes

you achieve that goal you’re like yes

you achieve that goal you’re like yes you feel like you’ve won something right

you feel like you’ve won something right

you feel like you’ve won something right that’s dopamine the whole purpose of

that’s dopamine the whole purpose of

that’s dopamine the whole purpose of dopamine is to make sure that we get

dopamine is to make sure that we get

dopamine is to make sure that we get stuff done right

stuff done right

stuff done right the historical reason for dopamine we

the historical reason for dopamine we

the historical reason for dopamine we would never eat if we only waited to get

would never eat if we only waited to get

would never eat if we only waited to get until we got hungry because there’s no

until we got hungry because there’s no

until we got hungry because there’s no guarantee that we would find food

guarantee that we would find food

guarantee that we would find food so dopamine exists to help us go looking

so dopamine exists to help us go looking

so dopamine exists to help us go looking for food we get dopamine when we eat

for food we get dopamine when we eat

for food we get dopamine when we eat which is one of the reasons we like

which is one of the reasons we like

which is one of the reasons we like eating and so when you see something

eating and so when you see something

eating and so when you see something that reminds you of something that feels

that reminds you of something that feels

that reminds you of something that feels good we want to do the behavior that

good we want to do the behavior that

good we want to do the behavior that helps us get that feeling right so let’s

helps us get that feeling right so let’s

helps us get that feeling right so let’s say you’re out there going for a walk

say you’re out there going for a walk

say you’re out there going for a walk and you see an apple tree in the

and you see an apple tree in the

and you see an apple tree in the distance you get a small hit of dopamine

distance you get a small hit of dopamine

distance you get a small hit of dopamine and then what it does is it focuses us

and then what it does is it focuses us

and then what it does is it focuses us on our goals and now we start walking

on our goals and now we start walking

on our goals and now we start walking towards the apple tree and as the apple

towards the apple tree and as the apple

towards the apple tree and as the apple tree starts to get a little bigger we

tree starts to get a little bigger we

tree starts to get a little bigger we feel like we’re making progress you get

feel like we’re making progress you get

feel like we’re making progress you get another little shot of dopamine and

another little shot of dopamine and

another little shot of dopamine and another little shadow dopamine until you

another little shadow dopamine until you

another little shadow dopamine until you get to the Train you’re like yes okay

get to the Train you’re like yes okay

get to the Train you’re like yes okay this is why we’re told you must write

this is why we’re told you must write

this is why we’re told you must write down your goals your goals must be

down your goals your goals must be

down your goals your goals must be tangible there’s a there’s a biological

tangible there’s a there’s a biological

tangible there’s a there’s a biological reason for that we we’re very very

reason for that we we’re very very

reason for that we we’re very very visually oriented animals you have to be

visually oriented animals you have to be

visually oriented animals you have to be able to see the goal for it to

able to see the goal for it to

able to see the goal for it to biologically stay focused right if you

biologically stay focused right if you

biologically stay focused right if you don’t write down your goals if you can’t

don’t write down your goals if you can’t

don’t write down your goals if you can’t see your goals it’s very hard to get

see your goals it’s very hard to get

see your goals it’s very hard to get motivated to get inspired for example

motivated to get inspired for example

motivated to get inspired for example think about corporate visions right a

think about corporate visions right a

think about corporate visions right a corporate vision is has to be something

corporate vision is has to be something

corporate vision is has to be something we can see right that’s why it’s called

we can see right that’s why it’s called

we can see right that’s why it’s called a vision you can see it right to be the

a vision you can see it right to be the

a vision you can see it right to be the biggest most respected to be the

biggest most respected to be the

biggest most respected to be the fastest-growing are not visions they’re

fastest-growing are not visions they’re

fastest-growing are not visions they’re nothing right what does that even look

nothing right what does that even look

nothing right what does that even look like respected by whom your mother

like respected by whom your mother

like respected by whom your mother yourself your friends your shareholders

yourself your friends your shareholders

yourself your friends your shareholders who knows what’s the metric dunno it’s

who knows what’s the metric dunno it’s

who knows what’s the metric dunno it’s Amorphis doesn’t motivate us just like I

Amorphis doesn’t motivate us just like I

Amorphis doesn’t motivate us just like I can’t tell you you will get a bonus if

can’t tell you you will get a bonus if

can’t tell you you will get a bonus if you achieve more you’re gonna ask me how

you achieve more you’re gonna ask me how

you achieve more you’re gonna ask me how much more I’m gonna say more doesn’t

much more I’m gonna say more doesn’t

much more I’m gonna say more doesn’t work

work

work you need a tangible goal you need a

you need a tangible goal you need a

you need a tangible goal you need a tangible goal right here’s a great

tangible goal right here’s a great

tangible goal right here’s a great vision Martin Luther King I have a dream

vision Martin Luther King I have a dream

vision Martin Luther King I have a dream that one day little black children and

that one day little black children and

that one day little black children and little white children will play on the

little white children will play on the

little white children will play on the playground together and hold hands

playground together and hold hands

playground together and hold hands together we can imagine that we can set

together we can imagine that we can set

together we can imagine that we can set our sights on that and every time we

our sights on that and every time we

our sights on that and every time we achieve a goal and achieve a metric and

achieve a goal and achieve a metric and

achieve a goal and achieve a metric and achieve a milestone that makes us feel

achieve a milestone that makes us feel

achieve a milestone that makes us feel like we’re making progress to the

like we’re making progress to the

like we’re making progress to the division we can see we keep going and

division we can see we keep going and

division we can see we keep going and going and going until we achieve

going and going until we achieve

going and going until we achieve something remarkable you have to be able

something remarkable you have to be able

something remarkable you have to be able to see it dopamine

to see it dopamine

to see it dopamine like I said dopamine is the feeling you

like I said dopamine is the feeling you

like I said dopamine is the feeling you get when you set out to find something

get when you set out to find something

get when you set out to find something you’re looking for as well

you’re looking for as well

you’re looking for as well talked about the to-do list I came home

talked about the to-do list I came home

talked about the to-do list I came home from a trip just a couple days ago and I

from a trip just a couple days ago and I

from a trip just a couple days ago and I had a bunch of errands to run and I

had a bunch of errands to run and I

had a bunch of errands to run and I wrote down a little list of things I had

wrote down a little list of things I had

wrote down a little list of things I had to do and off I went right and as I was

to do and off I went right and as I was

to do and off I went right and as I was walking past I think was a dragon I

walking past I think was a dragon I

walking past I think was a dragon I don’t remember I was walking past

don’t remember I was walking past

don’t remember I was walking past something I remembered oh I have to do

something I remembered oh I have to do

something I remembered oh I have to do that and I hadn’t written it down on my

that and I hadn’t written it down on my

that and I hadn’t written it down on my I hadn’t written down on my to-do list

I hadn’t written down on my to-do list

I hadn’t written down on my to-do list so I went in and finished what I needed

so I went in and finished what I needed

so I went in and finished what I needed to do and then when I came out I then

to do and then when I came out I then

to do and then when I came out I then wrote it on my to-do list and then

wrote it on my to-do list and then

wrote it on my to-do list and then crossed it out because I wanted the

crossed it out because I wanted the

crossed it out because I wanted the dopamine feels good dopamine comes with

dopamine feels good dopamine comes with

dopamine feels good dopamine comes with a warning dopamine is highly highly

a warning dopamine is highly highly

a warning dopamine is highly highly highly addictive here are some other

highly addictive here are some other

highly addictive here are some other things that release dopamine alcohol

things that release dopamine alcohol

things that release dopamine alcohol nicotine gambling your cell phone

nicotine gambling your cell phone

nicotine gambling your cell phone oh you think I’m joking oK we’ve all

oh you think I’m joking oK we’ve all

oh you think I’m joking oK we’ve all been told that you know if you wake up

been told that you know if you wake up

been told that you know if you wake up in the morning and you crave a drink you

in the morning and you crave a drink you

in the morning and you crave a drink you might be an alcoholic

might be an alcoholic

might be an alcoholic well if you wake up in the morning the

well if you wake up in the morning the

well if you wake up in the morning the first thing you do is check your phone

first thing you do is check your phone

first thing you do is check your phone before you even get out of bed might be

before you even get out of bed might be

before you even get out of bed might be an addict

an addict

an addict if you walk from room to room in your

if you walk from room to room in your

if you walk from room to room in your own apartment holding your telephone

you might be an addict when you’re

you might be an addict when you’re driving in your car and you get a text

driving in your car and you get a text

driving in your car and you get a text and your phone goes beep we we hate

and your phone goes beep we we hate

and your phone goes beep we we hate email true we love the beep the buzz the

email true we love the beep the buzz the

email true we love the beep the buzz the ding oh right you’ll be there in 10

ding oh right you’ll be there in 10

ding oh right you’ll be there in 10 minutes

minutes

minutes and yet you have to look at it right now

and yet you have to look at it right now

and yet you have to look at it right now you might be an addict and even if you

you might be an addict and even if you

you might be an addict and even if you read it and it says are you free for

read it and it says are you free for

read it and it says are you free for dinner next Thursday and you have to

dinner next Thursday and you have to

dinner next Thursday and you have to reply immediately you can’t wait to ten

reply immediately you can’t wait to ten

reply immediately you can’t wait to ten minutes you might be an addict and for

minutes you might be an addict and for

minutes you might be an addict and for all you Gen Y is out there who like to

all you Gen Y is out there who like to

all you Gen Y is out there who like to think that you’re better at multitasking

think that you’re better at multitasking

think that you’re better at multitasking beause you grew up with the technology

beause you grew up with the technology

beause you grew up with the technology then why do you keep crashing your cars

then why do you keep crashing your cars

then why do you keep crashing your cars when you’re texting you’re not you’re

when you’re texting you’re not you’re

when you’re texting you’re not you’re not better at multitasking you’re better

not better at multitasking you’re better

not better at multitasking you’re better at getting distracted in fact if you

at getting distracted in fact if you

at getting distracted in fact if you look at the statistics a DD and ADHD

look at the statistics a DD and ADHD

look at the statistics a DD and ADHD have diagnosis of a DD and ADHD have

have diagnosis of a DD and ADHD have

have diagnosis of a DD and ADHD have risen 66% in the past 10 years ok a DD

risen 66% in the past 10 years ok a DD

risen 66% in the past 10 years ok a DD and ADHD is a frontal lobe disorder

and ADHD is a frontal lobe disorder

and ADHD is a frontal lobe disorder right are you telling me out of nowhere

right are you telling me out of nowhere

right are you telling me out of nowhere 66 percent of our youth has the frontal

66 percent of our youth has the frontal

66 percent of our youth has the frontal lobe problem where did that come from no

lobe problem where did that come from no

lobe problem where did that come from no it’s a misdiagnosis right what what are

it’s a misdiagnosis right what what are

it’s a misdiagnosis right what what are the what are the symptoms of a dopamine

the what are the symptoms of a dopamine

the what are the symptoms of a dopamine addiction to technology distractibility

addiction to technology distractibility

addiction to technology distractibility inability to get things done easily

inability to get things done easily

inability to get things done easily easily distracted you know

easily distracted you know

easily distracted you know shortness of attention it’s all the same

shortness of attention it’s all the same

shortness of attention it’s all the same thing so we misdiagnosed things it’s

thing so we misdiagnosed things it’s

thing so we misdiagnosed things it’s this it’s the addictive quality of

this it’s the addictive quality of

this it’s the addictive quality of dopamine we can also get addicted to

dopamine we can also get addicted to

dopamine we can also get addicted to performance in our companies when all

performance in our companies when all

performance in our companies when all they do is give us numbers to hit

they do is give us numbers to hit

they do is give us numbers to hit numbers to hit numbers to hit and a

numbers to hit numbers to hit and a

numbers to hit numbers to hit and a bonus you get and a bonus you get and a

bonus you get and a bonus you get and a

bonus you get and a bonus you get and a bonus you get all they’re doing is

bonus you get all they’re doing is

bonus you get all they’re doing is feeding us with dopamine and we can’t

feeding us with dopamine and we can’t

feeding us with dopamine and we can’t help ourselves all we do is want more

help ourselves all we do is want more

help ourselves all we do is want more more MORE it’s no surprise that the

more MORE it’s no surprise that the

more MORE it’s no surprise that the bank’s destroyed the economy because one

bank’s destroyed the economy because one

bank’s destroyed the economy because one of the things we know about dopamine

of the things we know about dopamine

of the things we know about dopamine addict is they will do anything to get

addict is they will do anything to get

addict is they will do anything to get another hit sometimes at the sacrifice

another hit sometimes at the sacrifice

another hit sometimes at the sacrifice of their own resources and their

of their own resources and their

of their own resources and their relationships ask any alcoholic gambling

relationships ask any alcoholic gambling

relationships ask any alcoholic gambling addict or or as drug addict just ask

addict or or as drug addict just ask

addict or or as drug addict just ask them how their relationships are doing

them how their relationships are doing

them how their relationships are doing and if they’ve squandered any of their

and if they’ve squandered any of their

and if they’ve squandered any of their resources it’s an addiction dopamine is

resources it’s an addiction dopamine is

resources it’s an addiction dopamine is dangerous if it is unbalanced it is

dangerous if it is unbalanced it is

dangerous if it is unbalanced it is hugely helpful when in a comfortable and

hugely helpful when in a comfortable and

hugely helpful when in a comfortable and balanced system that when unbalanced

balanced system that when unbalanced

balanced system that when unbalanced it’s dangerous that’s destructive you

it’s dangerous that’s destructive you

it’s dangerous that’s destructive you don’t need anybody’s help to get these

don’t need anybody’s help to get these

don’t need anybody’s help to get these go for a run achieve your goals you’ll

go for a run achieve your goals you’ll

go for a run achieve your goals you’ll get dopamine

get dopamine

get dopamine you’ll get endorphins but you won’t have

you’ll get endorphins but you won’t have

you’ll get endorphins but you won’t have any feeling of fulfillment or love or

any feeling of fulfillment or love or

any feeling of fulfillment or love or trust that’s where these come in these

trust that’s where these come in these

trust that’s where these come in these are attempting to manage these this is

are attempting to manage these this is

are attempting to manage these this is what makes our society great this is

what makes our society great this is

what makes our society great this is where people like Johnny Bravo come from

where people like Johnny Bravo come from

where people like Johnny Bravo come from it’s because of these two chemicals that

it’s because of these two chemicals that

it’s because of these two chemicals that leaders really fulfill their great

leaders really fulfill their great

leaders really fulfill their great responsibilities outside in the world is

responsibilities outside in the world is

responsibilities outside in the world is danger at all times for various reasons

danger at all times for various reasons

danger at all times for various reasons in caveman times that danger may have

in caveman times that danger may have

in caveman times that danger may have been you know a saber-toothed tiger it

been you know a saber-toothed tiger it

been you know a saber-toothed tiger it may have been the weather it may have

may have been the weather it may have

may have been the weather it may have been a lack of resources it may have

been a lack of resources it may have

been a lack of resources it may have been who knows any number of things

been who knows any number of things

been who knows any number of things things that with no conscience are

things that with no conscience are

things that with no conscience are trying to kill you they want to end your

trying to kill you they want to end your

trying to kill you they want to end your life and so how do we survive we work

life and so how do we survive we work

life and so how do we survive we work together and together we come together

together and together we come together

together and together we come together in our groups and our companies and our

in our groups and our companies and our

in our groups and our companies and our tribes to feel like we belong to be

tribes to feel like we belong to be

tribes to feel like we belong to be around people who believe what we

around people who believe what we

around people who believe what we believe so that we may feel safe when

believe so that we may feel safe when

believe so that we may feel safe when we’re surrounded by people who have our

we’re surrounded by people who have our

we’re surrounded by people who have our best interests in mind and we feel safe

best interests in mind and we feel safe

best interests in mind and we feel safe we will organize ourselves and cooperate

we will organize ourselves and cooperate

we will organize ourselves and cooperate to face the dangers externally don’t

to face the dangers externally don’t

to face the dangers externally don’t forget the outside dangers are a

forget the outside dangers are a

forget the outside dangers are a constant in a modern world the outside

constant in a modern world the outside

constant in a modern world the outside dangers may be your competition that’s

dangers may be your competition that’s

dangers may be your competition that’s trying to put you out of business or at

trying to put you out of business or at

trying to put you out of business or at least steal your business it might be

least steal your business it might be

least steal your business it might be the absent flows of the economy it might

the absent flows of the economy it might

the absent flows of the economy it might be terrorism all of these unknowns all

be terrorism all of these unknowns all

be terrorism all of these unknowns all trying to put you out of business take

trying to put you out of business take

trying to put you out of business take away your job take away your livelihood

away your job take away your livelihood

away your job take away your livelihood end it for you nothing personal it’s a

end it for you nothing personal it’s a

end it for you nothing personal it’s a constant inside our organizations the

constant inside our organizations the

constant inside our organizations the dangers we face are not a constant they

dangers we face are not a constant they

dangers we face are not a constant they are a variable and they are the

are a variable and they are the

are a variable and they are the decisions of leadership as to how safe

decisions of leadership as to how safe

decisions of leadership as to how safe they make us feel when we go to work

they make us feel when we go to work

they make us feel when we go to work this is the job of leaders ASA said it

this is the job of leaders ASA said it

this is the job of leaders ASA said it better than I can there’s an Aesop fable

better than I can there’s an Aesop fable

better than I can there’s an Aesop fable about four oxen that stand tailed to

about four oxen that stand tailed to

about four oxen that stand tailed to tail

tail

tail whenever the lion tries to eat them no

whenever the lion tries to eat them no

whenever the lion tries to eat them no matter what angle from which he attacks

matter what angle from which he attacks

matter what angle from which he attacks he will always be met with horns

he will always be met with horns

he will always be met with horns however due to infighting and

however due to infighting and

however due to infighting and disagreements they separate and they go

disagreements they separate and they go

disagreements they separate and they go and graze

and graze

and graze in different parts of the field and one

in different parts of the field and one

in different parts of the field and one by one the lion picks them off and kills

by one the lion picks them off and kills

by one the lion picks them off and kills them all when we stand together we can

them all when we stand together we can

them all when we stand together we can more easily face the dangers outside

more easily face the dangers outside

more easily face the dangers outside when we break up inside our companies if

when we break up inside our companies if

when we break up inside our companies if our leaders don’t allow us a space to

our leaders don’t allow us a space to

our leaders don’t allow us a space to feel safe inside our own companies to

feel safe inside our own companies to

feel safe inside our own companies to feel like we belong then we have to

feel like we belong then we have to

feel like we belong then we have to we’re forced to exert our own energy to

we’re forced to exert our own energy to

we’re forced to exert our own energy to protect ourselves from each other and by

protect ourselves from each other and by

protect ourselves from each other and by the way expose ourselves to greater

the way expose ourselves to greater

the way expose ourselves to greater danger from the outside if you have to

danger from the outside if you have to

danger from the outside if you have to worry about politics if you have to

worry about politics if you have to

worry about politics if you have to worry about someone stealing your credit

worry about someone stealing your credit

worry about someone stealing your credit if you have to worry about your boss not

if you have to worry about your boss not

if you have to worry about your boss not having your back think about the energy

having your back think about the energy

having your back think about the energy you invest not in your business not in

you invest not in your business not in

you invest not in your business not in the products you’re trying to develop

the products you’re trying to develop

the products you’re trying to develop not in your work not in how great you’re

not in your work not in how great you’re

not in your work not in how great you’re producing not in your creativity but in

producing not in your creativity but in

producing not in your creativity but in just keeping yourself feeling safe this

just keeping yourself feeling safe this

just keeping yourself feeling safe this is destructive the responsibilities of

is destructive the responsibilities of

is destructive the responsibilities of leadership is two things one to

leadership is two things one to

leadership is two things one to determine who gets in and who doesn’t

determine who gets in and who doesn’t

determine who gets in and who doesn’t get in this is what it means to start

get in this is what it means to start

get in this is what it means to start with why what are our values what are

with why what are our values what are

with why what are our values what are our beliefs who can we allow in second

our beliefs who can we allow in second

our beliefs who can we allow in second thing is to decide how big this is how

thing is to decide how big this is how

thing is to decide how big this is how big do we make the circle of safety how

big do we make the circle of safety how

big do we make the circle of safety how big do we make the circle of belonging

big do we make the circle of belonging

big do we make the circle of belonging do we keep it around just our c-level

do we keep it around just our c-level

do we keep it around just our c-level executives and call it an inner circle

executives and call it an inner circle

executives and call it an inner circle and allow others to try and fend for

and allow others to try and fend for

and allow others to try and fend for themselves and maybe try and get into

themselves and maybe try and get into

themselves and maybe try and get into our inner circle or do we extend it to

our inner circle or do we extend it to

our inner circle or do we extend it to the outermost edges of the organization

the outermost edges of the organization

the outermost edges of the organization great leaders extend the circle of

great leaders extend the circle of

great leaders extend the circle of safety the circle of belonging out to

safety the circle of belonging out to

safety the circle of belonging out to the outermost edges so the most junior

the outermost edges so the most junior

the outermost edges so the most junior person feels like they belong feels safe

person feels like they belong feels safe

person feels like they belong feels safe feels like they have top cover from

feels like they have top cover from

feels like they have top cover from somebody like Johnny Bravo that’s what

somebody like Johnny Bravo that’s what

somebody like Johnny Bravo that’s what these other two chemicals are trying to

these other two chemicals are trying to

these other two chemicals are trying to do

do

do serotonin is the leadership chemical is

serotonin is the leadership chemical is

serotonin is the leadership chemical is the responsible for feelings of pride

the responsible for feelings of pride

the responsible for feelings of pride and status when you this is why public

and status when you this is why public

and status when you this is why public recognition is very important we are

recognition is very important we are

recognition is very important we are social animals and we need the

social animals and we need the

social animals and we need the recognition of others this is why we

recognition of others this is why we

recognition of others this is why we have the Oscars and this is why we have

have the Oscars and this is why we have

have the Oscars and this is why we have public awards events this is why we have

public awards events this is why we have

public awards events this is why we have commencement for graduation I mean think

commencement for graduation I mean think

commencement for graduation I mean think about it what does it really take to get

about it what does it really take to get

about it what does it really take to get to graduate college you need to pay your

to graduate college you need to pay your

to graduate college you need to pay your bills

bills

bills fulfill the minimum requirements and and

fulfill the minimum requirements and and

fulfill the minimum requirements and and collect enough credits that’s it right

collect enough credits that’s it right

collect enough credits that’s it right it’s a formula you could get an email

it’s a formula you could get an email

it’s a formula you could get an email that says congratulations you fulfilled

that says congratulations you fulfilled

that says congratulations you fulfilled all the requirements for graduation and

all the requirements for graduation and

all the requirements for graduation and closed please print out the PDF of your

closed please print out the PDF of your

closed please print out the PDF of your diploma PS magna laude right

diploma PS magna laude right

diploma PS magna laude right wouldn’t feel so good right so instead

wouldn’t feel so good right so instead

wouldn’t feel so good right so instead we have a big ceremony to recognize the

we have a big ceremony to recognize the

we have a big ceremony to recognize the accomplishment and in the audience we

accomplishment and in the audience we

accomplishment and in the audience we put our family and our friends and our

put our family and our friends and our

put our family and our friends and our teachers all of those in our tribe

teachers all of those in our tribe

teachers all of those in our tribe who’ve supported us and watched our

who’ve supported us and watched our

who’ve supported us and watched our backs as we’ve made it through and then

backs as we’ve made it through and then

backs as we’ve made it through and then we show up on that day and we go up on

we show up on that day and we go up on

we show up on that day and we go up on that stage and we take our diploma it

that stage and we take our diploma it

that stage and we take our diploma it feels great

feels great

feels great we feel our status rise we feel our

we feel our status rise we feel our

we feel our status rise we feel our pride go up and by the way when you have

pride go up and by the way when you have

pride go up and by the way when you have serotonin in your veins your confidence

serotonin in your veins your confidence

serotonin in your veins your confidence goes up also and here’s the best part

goes up also and here’s the best part

goes up also and here’s the best part about serotonin at the exact moment that

about serotonin at the exact moment that

about serotonin at the exact moment that you took your diploma and you felt that

you took your diploma and you felt that

you took your diploma and you felt that surge of serotonin go through your body

surge of serotonin go through your body

surge of serotonin go through your body at the exact moment your parents sitting

at the exact moment your parents sitting

at the exact moment your parents sitting in the audience also got a surge of

in the audience also got a surge of

in the audience also got a surge of serotonin and also felt an intense pride

serotonin and also felt an intense pride

serotonin and also felt an intense pride watching you graduate and this is what

watching you graduate and this is what

watching you graduate and this is what serotonin is trying to do it is trying

serotonin is trying to do it is trying

serotonin is trying to do it is trying to reinforce the relationship between

to reinforce the relationship between

to reinforce the relationship between parent and child boss and employee coach

parent and child boss and employee coach

parent and child boss and employee coach and player the caregiver and the one who

and player the caregiver and the one who

and player the caregiver and the one who is is Greta’s grateful for the support

is is Greta’s grateful for the support

is is Greta’s grateful for the support they are given and think about it listen

they are given and think about it listen

they are given and think about it listen to the speeches that we give if you give

to the speeches that we give if you give

to the speeches that we give if you give an award to somebody what do they say I

an award to somebody what do they say I

an award to somebody what do they say I couldn’t have done it I thank God I

couldn’t have done it I thank God I

couldn’t have done it I thank God I thank my parents I thank my coach we

thank my parents I thank my coach we

thank my parents I thank my coach we thank the person who we believed was

thank the person who we believed was

thank the person who we believed was looking out for us we could not have

looking out for us we could not have

looking out for us we could not have done this without them we say and they

done this without them we say and they

done this without them we say and they look at us and they say so

look at us and they say so

look at us and they say so out of you and we work to make them

out of you and we work to make them

out of you and we work to make them proud great teams don’t want to win the

proud great teams don’t want to win the

proud great teams don’t want to win the trophy great teams want to win one for

trophy great teams want to win one for

trophy great teams want to win one for the coach they want to make the coach

the coach they want to make the coach

the coach they want to make the coach proud we want to make our parents proud

proud we want to make our parents proud

proud we want to make our parents proud and it raises our status and it raises

and it raises our status and it raises

and it raises our status and it raises our confidence and it feels good and we

our confidence and it feels good and we

our confidence and it feels good and we in turn will look after others so that

in turn will look after others so that

in turn will look after others so that they may accomplish the same this is

they may accomplish the same this is

they may accomplish the same this is what serotonin is trying desperately to

what serotonin is trying desperately to

what serotonin is trying desperately to do the problem is you can trick

do the problem is you can trick

do the problem is you can trick serotonin we live in a materialist

serotonin we live in a materialist

serotonin we live in a materialist society so we judge status very often in

society so we judge status very often in

society so we judge status very often in our country based on how much money you

our country based on how much money you

our country based on how much money you make right so any conspicuous display of

make right so any conspicuous display of

make right so any conspicuous display of wealth raises your status this is why

wealth raises your status this is why

wealth raises your status this is why they put the logos on the outside no

they put the logos on the outside no

they put the logos on the outside no good on the inside nobody can see them

good on the inside nobody can see them

good on the inside nobody can see them we want the red line of ours our proud

we want the red line of ours our proud

we want the red line of ours our proud of glasses how good you you want a pair

of glasses how good you you want a pair

of glasses how good you you want a pair of designer shoes how good does it feel

of designer shoes how good does it feel

of designer shoes how good does it feel to put on your Gucci shoes oh my god it

to put on your Gucci shoes oh my god it

to put on your Gucci shoes oh my god it feels so good you walk out and you feel

feels so good you walk out and you feel

feels so good you walk out and you feel a million bucks you can actually feel

a million bucks you can actually feel

a million bucks you can actually feel your confidence rise when you put on you

your confidence rise when you put on you

your confidence rise when you put on you put on the stuff right because it’s

put on the stuff right because it’s

put on the stuff right because it’s showing this display of status it feels

showing this display of status it feels

showing this display of status it feels great the problem is there was no real

great the problem is there was no real

great the problem is there was no real relationship that was reinforced because

relationship that was reinforced because

relationship that was reinforced because of it you tricked the system that’s why

of it you tricked the system that’s why

of it you tricked the system that’s why we keep trying to accomplish things and

we keep trying to accomplish things and

we keep trying to accomplish things and accumulate more and more material goods

accumulate more and more material goods

accumulate more and more material goods and yet we never feel successful because

and yet we never feel successful because

and yet we never feel successful because there was no relationship we tricked it

there was no relationship we tricked it

there was no relationship we tricked it we gained it serotonin is the leadership

we gained it serotonin is the leadership

we gained it serotonin is the leadership chemical the reason I call it the

chemical the reason I call it the

chemical the reason I call it the leadership chemical is a historical

leadership chemical is a historical

leadership chemical is a historical reason a very simple historical reason

reason a very simple historical reason

reason a very simple historical reason we had a very practical problem as our

we had a very practical problem as our

we had a very practical problem as our animal was developing as the Homo Sapien

animal was developing as the Homo Sapien

animal was developing as the Homo Sapien was developing we lived in communities

was developing we lived in communities

was developing we lived in communities of about a hundred and a hundred and

of about a hundred and a hundred and

of about a hundred and a hundred and fifty people and there’s a very

fifty people and there’s a very

fifty people and there’s a very practical issue which is if we’re hungry

practical issue which is if we’re hungry

practical issue which is if we’re hungry and somebody brings back food and drop a

and somebody brings back food and drop a

and somebody brings back food and drop a carcass on the floor we’re all gonna

carcass on the floor we’re all gonna

carcass on the floor we’re all gonna rush in to eat and if you’re lucky

rush in to eat and if you’re lucky

rush in to eat and if you’re lucky enough to be built like a linebacker

enough to be built like a linebacker

enough to be built like a linebacker you will elbow your way to the front and

you will elbow your way to the front and

you will elbow your way to the front and if you’re the artistic one of the family

you get the elbow in the face not a good

you get the elbow in the face not a good system to keep the whole tribe alive and

system to keep the whole tribe alive and

system to keep the whole tribe alive and definitely not a good system for

definitely not a good system for

definitely not a good system for cooperation because remember the value

cooperation because remember the value

cooperation because remember the value of group living means that if I trust

of group living means that if I trust

of group living means that if I trust you and you trust me I can fall asleep

you and you trust me I can fall asleep

you and you trust me I can fall asleep at night and trust that you will alert

at night and trust that you will alert

at night and trust that you will alert me to danger if I don’t trust you I

me to danger if I don’t trust you I

me to danger if I don’t trust you I can’t go to sleep at night it’s the same

can’t go to sleep at night it’s the same

can’t go to sleep at night it’s the same in our companies if we trust each other

in our companies if we trust each other

in our companies if we trust each other we will turn our backs we will take

we will turn our backs we will take

we will turn our backs we will take risks we will innovate we will do things

risks we will innovate we will do things

risks we will innovate we will do things that will change the course of our world

that will change the course of our world

that will change the course of our world if I don’t trust you I can’t do that I

if I don’t trust you I can’t do that I

if I don’t trust you I can’t do that I can’t do that there’s value in group

can’t do that there’s value in group

can’t do that there’s value in group living and group working and so if

living and group working and so if

living and group working and so if you’ve got an elbow in the face that

you’ve got an elbow in the face that

you’ve got an elbow in the face that afternoon odds are very high that you’re

afternoon odds are very high that you’re

afternoon odds are very high that you’re not gonna wake the guy who punched you

not gonna wake the guy who punched you

not gonna wake the guy who punched you if dangers there you’re just not gonna

if dangers there you’re just not gonna

if dangers there you’re just not gonna do it bad system and so we evolved into

do it bad system and so we evolved into

do it bad system and so we evolved into hierarchical animals we’re constantly

hierarchical animals we’re constantly

hierarchical animals we’re constantly assessing and judging each other

assessing and judging each other

assessing and judging each other constantly arranging ourselves who’s the

constantly arranging ourselves who’s the

constantly arranging ourselves who’s the Alpha who’s the dominant who’s the one

Alpha who’s the dominant who’s the one

Alpha who’s the dominant who’s the one who who sort of is the is that is the

who who sort of is the is that is the

who who sort of is the is that is the more dominant personality or dominant

more dominant personality or dominant

more dominant personality or dominant talent in the room in cavemen times that

talent in the room in cavemen times that

talent in the room in cavemen times that might have been physical muscle in the

might have been physical muscle in the

might have been physical muscle in the creative industry might be talent in you

creative industry might be talent in you

creative industry might be talent in you know the military might be courage

know the military might be courage

know the military might be courage there’s no standard by which we judge

there’s no standard by which we judge

there’s no standard by which we judge alphas it’s relative to the industries

alphas it’s relative to the industries

alphas it’s relative to the industries were in and it’s relative to us as well

were in and it’s relative to us as well

were in and it’s relative to us as well if you’ve ever met someone and you were

if you’ve ever met someone and you were

if you’ve ever met someone and you were nervous while you were meeting them

nervous while you were meeting them

nervous while you were meeting them you’re not the Alpha we’ve all had the

you’re not the Alpha we’ve all had the

you’re not the Alpha we’ve all had the experience where we’re meeting somebody

experience where we’re meeting somebody

experience where we’re meeting somebody and we can sense that they’re nervous

and we can sense that they’re nervous

and we can sense that they’re nervous meeting us you’re the Alpha I’ll tell

meeting us you’re the Alpha I’ll tell

meeting us you’re the Alpha I’ll tell you a little aside that’s kind of funny

you a little aside that’s kind of funny

you a little aside that’s kind of funny you know when women all live together

you know when women all live together

you know when women all live together their menstrual cycles align right

their menstrual cycles align right

their menstrual cycles align right assuming they’re not on the pill then it

assuming they’re not on the pill then it

assuming they’re not on the pill then it doesn’t work right but if they’re not on

doesn’t work right but if they’re not on

doesn’t work right but if they’re not on the pill that all the mental cycles go

the pill that all the mental cycles go

the pill that all the mental cycles go together on the same schedule it’s not

together on the same schedule it’s not

together on the same schedule it’s not arbitrary they always align with the

arbitrary they always align with the

arbitrary they always align with the alpha females schedule and the reason is

alpha females schedule and the reason is

alpha females schedule and the reason is is because when a woman is in her

is because when a woman is in her

is because when a woman is in her menstrual cycle she can’t bear children

menstrual cycle she can’t bear children

menstrual cycle she can’t bear children and so in evolutionary terms you want

and so in evolutionary terms you want

and so in evolutionary terms you want the alpha male male female to to do it

the alpha male male female to to do it

the alpha male male female to to do it so you can have alpha children right

so you can have alpha children right

so you can have alpha children right nice strong strapping kids are gonna

nice strong strapping kids are gonna

nice strong strapping kids are gonna survive but if she’s off the market that

survive but if she’s off the market that

survive but if she’s off the market that produces competition so mother nature

produces competition so mother nature

produces competition so mother nature has in

has in

has in and created a very clever way that when

and created a very clever way that when

and created a very clever way that when she’s off the market everyone’s off the

she’s off the market everyone’s off the

she’s off the market everyone’s off the market back to the talk so we’re

market back to the talk so we’re

market back to the talk so we’re constantly judging and assessing each

constantly judging and assessing each

constantly judging and assessing each other who’s alpha right and what we do

other who’s alpha right and what we do

other who’s alpha right and what we do is when we assess that someone else is

is when we assess that someone else is

is when we assess that someone else is the alpha we voluntarily take a step

the alpha we voluntarily take a step

the alpha we voluntarily take a step back and allow them to eat first alphas

back and allow them to eat first alphas

back and allow them to eat first alphas get first choice of meat and first

get first choice of meat and first

get first choice of meat and first choice of mate good system good system

choice of mate good system good system

choice of mate good system good system the Alpha gets to eat first the rest of

the Alpha gets to eat first the rest of

the Alpha gets to eat first the rest of us may not get the best cut of meat but

us may not get the best cut of meat but

us may not get the best cut of meat but we will get to eat eventually and we

we will get to eat eventually and we

we will get to eat eventually and we won’t get an elbow in the face good

won’t get an elbow in the face good

won’t get an elbow in the face good system will happily alert them to danger

system will happily alert them to danger

system will happily alert them to danger later good system this is why we’re

later good system this is why we’re

later good system this is why we’re constantly trying to raise our status is

constantly trying to raise our status is

constantly trying to raise our status is because there are benefits to being the

because there are benefits to being the

because there are benefits to being the Alpha people will do things for us and

Alpha people will do things for us and

Alpha people will do things for us and step back and offer us favors right we

step back and offer us favors right we

step back and offer us favors right we were and we to this day we’re perfectly

were and we to this day we’re perfectly

were and we to this day we’re perfectly comfortable giving special treatment to

comfortable giving special treatment to

comfortable giving special treatment to our alphas no one has a problem that

our alphas no one has a problem that

our alphas no one has a problem that your boss makes more money than you you

your boss makes more money than you you

your boss makes more money than you you might think he’s an ass but you don’t

might think he’s an ass but you don’t

might think he’s an ass but you don’t have a problem that he makes more money

have a problem that he makes more money

have a problem that he makes more money nobody has a problem that somebody

nobody has a problem that somebody

nobody has a problem that somebody outrank who outranks us at work has a

outrank who outranks us at work has a

outrank who outranks us at work has a bigger office than us doesn’t offend us

bigger office than us doesn’t offend us

bigger office than us doesn’t offend us it’s deeply ingrained in us we happily

it’s deeply ingrained in us we happily

it’s deeply ingrained in us we happily step aside and allow our alphas first

step aside and allow our alphas first

step aside and allow our alphas first choice of meat and first choice of mate

choice of meat and first choice of mate

choice of meat and first choice of mate it’s good to be the king there are

it’s good to be the king there are

it’s good to be the king there are advantages that come with being the

advantages that come with being the

advantages that come with being the Alpha you get special treatment you get

Alpha you get special treatment you get

Alpha you get special treatment you get to eat first people show you love and

to eat first people show you love and

to eat first people show you love and respect it boosts the serotonin you walk

respect it boosts the serotonin you walk

respect it boosts the serotonin you walk around like this it boosts your

around like this it boosts your

around like this it boosts your confidence it’s awesome but it comes at

confidence it’s awesome but it comes at

confidence it’s awesome but it comes at a cost you see the group is not stupid

a cost you see the group is not stupid

a cost you see the group is not stupid we’re not giving all of that stuff away

we’re not giving all of that stuff away

we’re not giving all of that stuff away for free leadership alpha comes at a

for free leadership alpha comes at a

for free leadership alpha comes at a cost

cost

cost you see we expect that when danger

you see we expect that when danger

you see we expect that when danger threatens us from the outside that the

threatens us from the outside that the

threatens us from the outside that the person who’s actually stronger the

person who’s actually stronger the

person who’s actually stronger the person who’s better fed and the person

person who’s better fed and the person

person who’s better fed and the person who is actually teeming with serotonin

who is actually teeming with serotonin

who is actually teeming with serotonin and actually as higher confidence of the

and actually as higher confidence of the

and actually as higher confidence of the rest of us we expect them to run towards

rest of us we expect them to run towards

rest of us we expect them to run towards the danger to protect us this is what it

the danger to protect us this is what it

the danger to protect us this is what it means to be a leader the cost of

means to be a leader the cost of

means to be a leader the cost of leadership is self-interest if you’re

leadership is self-interest if you’re

leadership is self-interest if you’re not willing to give up your perks when

not willing to give up your perks when

not willing to give up your perks when it matters then you probably shouldn’t

it matters then you probably shouldn’t

it matters then you probably shouldn’t get promoted

get promoted

get promoted you might be an authority but you will

you might be an authority but you will

you might be an authority but you will not be a leader leadership comes at a

not be a leader leadership comes at a

not be a leader leadership comes at a cost you don’t get to do less work when

cost you don’t get to do less work when

cost you don’t get to do less work when you get more senior you have to do more

you get more senior you have to do more

you get more senior you have to do more work and the more work you have to do is

work and the more work you have to do is

work and the more work you have to do is put yourself at risk to look after

put yourself at risk to look after

put yourself at risk to look after others that is the anthropological

others that is the anthropological

others that is the anthropological definition of what a leader is this is

definition of what a leader is this is

definition of what a leader is this is why we’re so offended by these banker

why we’re so offended by these banker

why we’re so offended by these banker boys who pay themselves astronomical

boys who pay themselves astronomical

boys who pay themselves astronomical salaries it has nothing to do with the

salaries it has nothing to do with the

salaries it has nothing to do with the number it has to do with the fact that

number it has to do with the fact that

number it has to do with the fact that they have violated a deep-seated social

they have violated a deep-seated social

they have violated a deep-seated social contract we know that they made all of

contract we know that they made all of

contract we know that they made all of that money and allowed their people to

that money and allowed their people to

that money and allowed their people to be sacrificed in fact they may have

be sacrificed in fact they may have

be sacrificed in fact they may have sacrificed their people for the money if

sacrificed their people for the money if

sacrificed their people for the money if I told you we’re gonna give a hundred

I told you we’re gonna give a hundred

I told you we’re gonna give a hundred and fifty million dollars to Nelson

and fifty million dollars to Nelson

and fifty million dollars to Nelson Mandela would anyone have a problem with

Mandela would anyone have a problem with

Mandela would anyone have a problem with that

that

that nope two hundred and fifty million

nope two hundred and fifty million

nope two hundred and fifty million dollars to mother Teresa got an issue

dollars to mother Teresa got an issue

dollars to mother Teresa got an issue with it no it’s not the number it’s not

with it no it’s not the number it’s not

with it no it’s not the number it’s not the amount of money they make it’s that

the amount of money they make it’s that

the amount of money they make it’s that we are deeply and viscerally offended

we are deeply and viscerally offended

we are deeply and viscerally offended that we know that we allowed them to

that we know that we allowed them to

that we know that we allowed them to have this alpha position and they did

have this alpha position and they did

have this alpha position and they did not fulfill their responsibility of the

not fulfill their responsibility of the

not fulfill their responsibility of the Alpha they’re supposed to sacrifice

Alpha they’re supposed to sacrifice

Alpha they’re supposed to sacrifice themselves for us never sacrifice us for

themselves for us never sacrifice us for

themselves for us never sacrifice us for themselves this is why we’re angry and

themselves this is why we’re angry and

themselves this is why we’re angry and offended and don’t trust them they fail

offended and don’t trust them they fail

offended and don’t trust them they fail oh there’s more

[Music]

[Music] oxytocin this is the best chemical of

oxytocin this is the best chemical of

oxytocin this is the best chemical of all oxytocin is the feeling of love

all oxytocin is the feeling of love

all oxytocin is the feeling of love trust and friendship it’s all the warm

trust and friendship it’s all the warm

trust and friendship it’s all the warm and fuzzies it’s all the unicorns and

and fuzzies it’s all the unicorns and

and fuzzies it’s all the unicorns and rainbows it’s the reason we like to

rainbows it’s the reason we like to

rainbows it’s the reason we like to spend time with our friends even if we

spend time with our friends even if we

spend time with our friends even if we don’t do anything with them we just sit

don’t do anything with them we just sit

don’t do anything with them we just sit and watch TV we love their company I

and watch TV we love their company I

and watch TV we love their company I promise you nearly every single person

promise you nearly every single person

promise you nearly every single person sitting in this room today chose the

sitting in this room today chose the

sitting in this room today chose the person they’re sitting next to you’re

person they’re sitting next to you’re

person they’re sitting next to you’re not sitting next to a stranger you’re

not sitting next to a stranger you’re

not sitting next to a stranger you’re sitting next to somebody you met came

sitting next to somebody you met came

sitting next to somebody you met came with work or kind of know a little bit

with work or kind of know a little bit

with work or kind of know a little bit why because it makes you feel safer

why because it makes you feel safer

why because it makes you feel safer doesn’t it if you got up and went and

doesn’t it if you got up and went and

doesn’t it if you got up and went and sat next to strangers wouldn’t feel so

sat next to strangers wouldn’t feel so

sat next to strangers wouldn’t feel so good that’s the feeling of oxytocin

good that’s the feeling of oxytocin

good that’s the feeling of oxytocin oxytocin is that intense feeling of

oxytocin is that intense feeling of

oxytocin is that intense feeling of safety that someone’s got your back

safety that someone’s got your back

safety that someone’s got your back there are multiple ways you can get

there are multiple ways you can get

there are multiple ways you can get oxytocin one way to get it is physical

oxytocin one way to get it is physical

oxytocin one way to get it is physical contact

contact

contact hugging feels wonderful right this when

hugging feels wonderful right this when

hugging feels wonderful right this when women give birth to children huge surge

women give birth to children huge surge

women give birth to children huge surge of oxytocin in their body this is what’s

of oxytocin in their body this is what’s

of oxytocin in their body this is what’s responsible for the mother parent that

responsible for the mother parent that

responsible for the mother parent that the mother-child bond right it’s all

the mother-child bond right it’s all

the mother-child bond right it’s all that oxytocin in the system this is why

that oxytocin in the system this is why

that oxytocin in the system this is why shaking hands matters

shaking hands matters

shaking hands matters imagine you’re doing the deal with

imagine you’re doing the deal with

imagine you’re doing the deal with someone and you’re ready to sign the

someone and you’re ready to sign the

someone and you’re ready to sign the contract and you say I’m so excited to

contract and you say I’m so excited to

contract and you say I’m so excited to do business with you

do business with you

do business with you and they go I don’t need to shake let’s

and they go I don’t need to shake let’s

and they go I don’t need to shake let’s sign the contract I’m also excited to do

sign the contract I’m also excited to do

sign the contract I’m also excited to do business with you you go great well

business with you you go great well

business with you you go great well let’s shake on it then they go no no no

let’s shake on it then they go no no no

let’s shake on it then they go no no no I agree to all the terms let’s get this

I agree to all the terms let’s get this

I agree to all the terms let’s get this deal done I can’t wait to work with you

deal done I can’t wait to work with you

deal done I can’t wait to work with you there you might get everything you want

there you might get everything you want

there you might get everything you want in the contract but business

in the contract but business

in the contract but business relationships are not rational they’re

relationships are not rational they’re

relationships are not rational they’re about feeling safe they’re about feeling

about feeling safe they’re about feeling

about feeling safe they’re about feeling we belong it’s human and one of the ways

we belong it’s human and one of the ways

we belong it’s human and one of the ways we want to know that that relationship

we want to know that that relationship

we want to know that that relationship is solidified is with physical touch

is solidified is with physical touch

is solidified is with physical touch they’re simple refusal to touch you to

they’re simple refusal to touch you to

they’re simple refusal to touch you to exchange that oxytocin means one of two

exchange that oxytocin means one of two

exchange that oxytocin means one of two things will happen

things will happen

things will happen you will either completely scuttle the

you will either completely scuttle the

you will either completely scuttle the deal or you will go into it nervous

deal or you will go into it nervous

deal or you will go into it nervous human bonds matter another way you can

human bonds matter another way you can

human bonds matter another way you can get oxytocin is through acts of human

get oxytocin is through acts of human

get oxytocin is through acts of human generosity an act of human generosity is

generosity an act of human generosity is

generosity an act of human generosity is defined as giving of your time and

defined as giving of your time and

defined as giving of your time and energy and X

energy and X

energy and X affecting nothing in return money

affecting nothing in return money

affecting nothing in return money doesn’t work sorry if I told you that

doesn’t work sorry if I told you that

doesn’t work sorry if I told you that this morning I gave $1,000 to charity

this morning I gave $1,000 to charity

this morning I gave $1,000 to charity what would you think of me you’d be like

what would you think of me you’d be like

what would you think of me you’d be like good for you

good for you

good for you what do you want to meddle but if I told

what do you want to meddle but if I told

what do you want to meddle but if I told you that last Saturday I gave up my day

you that last Saturday I gave up my day

you that last Saturday I gave up my day and I went and painted schools in the

and I went and painted schools in the

and I went and painted schools in the inner city then what would you think

inner city then what would you think

inner city then what would you think you’d be like nice cool I should do more

you’d be like nice cool I should do more

you’d be like nice cool I should do more right

right

right the the value of my labour much less

the the value of my labour much less

the the value of my labour much less than a thousand dollars could have hired

than a thousand dollars could have hired

than a thousand dollars could have hired many more people for a thousand dollars

many more people for a thousand dollars

many more people for a thousand dollars to go paint schools in the inner city

to go paint schools in the inner city

to go paint schools in the inner city but you see as human beings we put a

but you see as human beings we put a

but you see as human beings we put a premium on time because it is an equal

premium on time because it is an equal

premium on time because it is an equal commodity and it is a non redeemable

commodity and it is a non redeemable

commodity and it is a non redeemable commodity you spend money you make money

commodity you spend money you make money

commodity you spend money you make money you spend time you’ll never get it back

you spend time you’ll never get it back

you spend time you’ll never get it back some of you are sitting in this room

some of you are sitting in this room

some of you are sitting in this room right now saying I will never get this

right now saying I will never get this

right now saying I will never get this time back I got nothing for you

time back I got nothing for you

time back I got nothing for you so we put a premium on people who give

so we put a premium on people who give

so we put a premium on people who give us their time and energy a leader who

us their time and energy a leader who

us their time and energy a leader who says to you I’ll pay for something for

says to you I’ll pay for something for

says to you I’ll pay for something for you is not a leader a leader comes and

you is not a leader a leader comes and

you is not a leader a leader comes and sits down next to you and says how can I

sits down next to you and says how can I

sits down next to you and says how can I help you is a leader I was talking to

help you is a leader I was talking to

help you is a leader I was talking to some oil executives and they were trying

some oil executives and they were trying

some oil executives and they were trying to convince me that they really care

to convince me that they really care

to convince me that they really care about how fulfilled and how happy their

about how fulfilled and how happy their

about how fulfilled and how happy their employees are at work to which I said no

employees are at work to which I said no

employees are at work to which I said no you don’t and they said no we do and I

you don’t and they said no we do and I

you don’t and they said no we do and I said no you know and they said yeah we

said no you know and they said yeah we

said no you know and they said yeah we do you see how this win and I said I bet

do you see how this win and I said I bet

do you see how this win and I said I bet you hired some high-priced consultancy

you hired some high-priced consultancy

you hired some high-priced consultancy to come into a web survey about whether

to come into a web survey about whether

to come into a web survey about whether people like their jobs or not and they

people like their jobs or not and they

people like their jobs or not and they said well we didn’t hire a consultancy I

said well we didn’t hire a consultancy I

said well we didn’t hire a consultancy I said okay so it’s kind of like sending

said okay so it’s kind of like sending

said okay so it’s kind of like sending your son an email right dear son your

your son an email right dear son your

your son an email right dear son your mother and I care that you feel like a

mother and I care that you feel like a

mother and I care that you feel like a valuable part of this family

valuable part of this family

valuable part of this family please tell us candidly what we can do

please tell us candidly what we can do

please tell us candidly what we can do better so that you feel like you belong

better so that you feel like you belong

better so that you feel like you belong here because we really love you love dad

here because we really love you love dad

here because we really love you love dad or you go into his room you sit on his

or you go into his room you sit on his

or you go into his room you sit on his bed and you say hey son your mom and I

bed and you say hey son your mom and I

bed and you say hey son your mom and I really care that you feel like a

really care that you feel like a

really care that you feel like a valuable member of this family

valuable member of this family

valuable member of this family please tell us candidly what we can do

please tell us candidly what we can do

please tell us candidly what we can do better because we want you to feel like

better because we want you to feel like

better because we want you to feel like you belong and we really love you same

you belong and we really love you same

you belong and we really love you same words same intention same desire the

words same intention same desire the

words same intention same desire the difference is one you gave time and

difference is one you gave time and

difference is one you gave time and energy and the other one you didn’t this

energy and the other one you didn’t this

energy and the other one you didn’t this is the problem with email it’s too easy

is the problem with email it’s too easy

is the problem with email it’s too easy it’s too easy

it’s too easy

it’s too easy there’s no time and energy expended it’s

there’s no time and energy expended it’s

there’s no time and energy expended it’s too easy don’t feel anything if I come

too easy don’t feel anything if I come

too easy don’t feel anything if I come to your house for dinner you make me a

to your house for dinner you make me a

to your house for dinner you make me a lovely dinner the next day I send you a

lovely dinner the next day I send you a

lovely dinner the next day I send you a very nice thank-you email what a

very nice thank-you email what a

very nice thank-you email what a wonderful host you are or three days

wonderful host you are or three days

wonderful host you are or three days later you receive a handwritten note

later you receive a handwritten note

later you receive a handwritten note from me with the exact same words that

from me with the exact same words that

from me with the exact same words that were written in the email which one

were written in the email which one

were written in the email which one makes you feel better

makes you feel better

makes you feel better note the sentiment was the same the

note the sentiment was the same the

note the sentiment was the same the words were the same the difference is

words were the same the difference is

words were the same the difference is one took a little more time and a little

one took a little more time and a little

one took a little more time and a little more energy leaders are the ones who

more energy leaders are the ones who

more energy leaders are the ones who give us their time and give us their

give us their time and give us their

give us their time and give us their energy not the ones who give us their

energy not the ones who give us their

energy not the ones who give us their money it doesn’t count doesn’t work just

money it doesn’t count doesn’t work just

money it doesn’t count doesn’t work just biologically doesn’t work this is how

biologically doesn’t work this is how

biologically doesn’t work this is how you get oxytocin doing nice things for

you get oxytocin doing nice things for

you get oxytocin doing nice things for people that require that you sacrifice a

people that require that you sacrifice a

people that require that you sacrifice a little bit of time a little bit of

little bit of time a little bit of

little bit of time a little bit of energy something you will never get back

energy something you will never get back

energy something you will never get back and if you expect something in return

and if you expect something in return

and if you expect something in return then you weren’t really giving in the

then you weren’t really giving in the

then you weren’t really giving in the first place you take someone out for

first place you take someone out for

first place you take someone out for dinner because you want them to hire you

dinner because you want them to hire you

dinner because you want them to hire you you’re not really taking them out for

you’re not really taking them out for

you’re not really taking them out for dinner you want something in return it’s

dinner you want something in return it’s

dinner you want something in return it’s just a protracted transaction it’s not

just a protracted transaction it’s not

just a protracted transaction it’s not relationship building it’s nonsense I

relationship building it’s nonsense I

relationship building it’s nonsense I was walking down the streets of New York

was walking down the streets of New York

was walking down the streets of New York true story and guy in front of me his

true story and guy in front of me his

true story and guy in front of me his backpack opened a bunch of paper filled

backpack opened a bunch of paper filled

backpack opened a bunch of paper filled spilled out on the on the street didn’t

spilled out on the on the street didn’t

spilled out on the on the street didn’t think much of it I bent down gathered

think much of it I bent down gathered

think much of it I bent down gathered the papers up handed them back to him

the papers up handed them back to him

the papers up handed them back to him and pointed out that his bag it opened I

and pointed out that his bag it opened I

and pointed out that his bag it opened I did a small act of generosity for

did a small act of generosity for

did a small act of generosity for somebody I got a small burst of oxytocin

somebody I got a small burst of oxytocin

somebody I got a small burst of oxytocin I felt good also the person on the

I felt good also the person on the

I felt good also the person on the receiving end of the act of generosity

receiving end of the act of generosity

receiving end of the act of generosity feels good they get a shot of oxytocin

feels good they get a shot of oxytocin

feels good they get a shot of oxytocin he felt good he says thanks get to the

he felt good he says thanks get to the

he felt good he says thanks get to the end of the block and I’m standing

end of the block and I’m standing

end of the block and I’m standing waiting to cross the street and a guy

waiting to cross the street and a guy

waiting to cross the street and a guy who’s also happens to be standing

who’s also happens to be standing

who’s also happens to be standing waiting to cross the street turns around

waiting to cross the street turns around

waiting to cross the street turns around true story turns around and says to me I

true story turns around and says to me I

true story turns around and says to me I saw what you did back there that was

saw what you did back there that was

saw what you did back there that was really cool

as it turns out witnessing acts of human

as it turns out witnessing acts of human generosity release oxytocin remember our

generosity release oxytocin remember our

generosity release oxytocin remember our bodies are trying to get us to repeat

bodies are trying to get us to repeat

bodies are trying to get us to repeat behaviors that are in our best interest

behaviors that are in our best interest

behaviors that are in our best interest and it’s making us feel good when we see

and it’s making us feel good when we see

and it’s making us feel good when we see or do acts of human generosity so that

or do acts of human generosity so that

or do acts of human generosity so that we will do them in fact the more

we will do them in fact the more

we will do them in fact the more oxytocin you have in your body the more

oxytocin you have in your body the more

oxytocin you have in your body the more generous you actually become you know is

generous you actually become you know is

generous you actually become you know is the more you do the more you want to do

the more you do the more you want to do

the more you do the more you want to do it gets better than that

it gets better than that

it gets better than that lots of oxytocin in your body inhibits

lots of oxytocin in your body inhibits

lots of oxytocin in your body inhibits addiction it makes it very difficult to

addiction it makes it very difficult to

addiction it makes it very difficult to get addicted to something when you have

get addicted to something when you have

get addicted to something when you have lots of oxytocin your body actually hits

lots of oxytocin your body actually hits

lots of oxytocin your body actually hits addiction it boosts your immune system

addiction it boosts your immune system

addiction it boosts your immune system it makes you healthier

it makes you healthier

it makes you healthier that’s why happy people live longer it’s

that’s why happy people live longer it’s

that’s why happy people live longer it’s why couples live longer

why couples live longer

why couples live longer oxytocin it actually is good for us it

oxytocin it actually is good for us it

oxytocin it actually is good for us it increases our ability to solve problems

increases our ability to solve problems

increases our ability to solve problems it increases our creativity it’s really

it increases our creativity it’s really

it increases our creativity it’s really good for us and it’s not addictive it

good for us and it’s not addictive it

good for us and it’s not addictive it just feels great it takes time to build

just feels great it takes time to build

just feels great it takes time to build up the you know if I went on a date with

up the you know if I went on a date with

up the you know if I went on a date with a girl the other day there’s a first

a girl the other day there’s a first

a girl the other day there’s a first date we totally got along great we’re

date we totally got along great we’re

date we totally got along great we’re gonna get married why are you laughing

gonna get married why are you laughing

gonna get married why are you laughing that’s my social life the reason you

that’s my social life the reason you

that’s my social life the reason you laugh is because you inherently know

laugh is because you inherently know

laugh is because you inherently know that I cannot form a bond of trust

that I cannot form a bond of trust

that I cannot form a bond of trust strong enough to get married in seven

strong enough to get married in seven

strong enough to get married in seven days you know that why don’t you go in a

days you know that why don’t you go in a

days you know that why don’t you go in a couple more days but inherently you know

couple more days but inherently you know

couple more days but inherently you know that right

that right

that right but if I told you that I’ve been dating

but if I told you that I’ve been dating

but if I told you that I’ve been dating somebody for seven years and we’re not

somebody for seven years and we’re not

somebody for seven years and we’re not married yet what do you say

married yet what do you say

married yet what do you say what’s wrong in other words we know that

what’s wrong in other words we know that

what’s wrong in other words we know that that bond of trust takes more than seven

that bond of trust takes more than seven

that bond of trust takes more than seven days in less than seven years don’t know

days in less than seven years don’t know

days in less than seven years don’t know how long it takes them so when you start

how long it takes them so when you start

how long it takes them so when you start a new job and you’re really excited to

a new job and you’re really excited to

a new job and you’re really excited to work there and they’re really excited to

work there and they’re really excited to

work there and they’re really excited to have you don’t quite feel like you

have you don’t quite feel like you

have you don’t quite feel like you belong you don’t quite feel like you’re

belong you don’t quite feel like you’re

belong you don’t quite feel like you’re trusted yet right even though you were

trusted yet right even though you were

trusted yet right even though you were really excited they’re like it takes

really excited they’re like it takes

really excited they’re like it takes time and you have to do little acts of

time and you have to do little acts of

time and you have to do little acts of generosity and make little sacrifices do

generosity and make little sacrifices do

generosity and make little sacrifices do little things for people not big risk

little things for people not big risk

little things for people not big risk small risks it’s like dating you know

small risks it’s like dating you know

small risks it’s like dating you know you don’t start by buying them a diamond

you don’t start by buying them a diamond

you don’t start by buying them a diamond you start by taking them for lunch

you start by taking them for lunch

you start by taking them for lunch buying them a drink you know little bits

buying them a drink you know little bits

buying them a drink you know little bits then they take you out or they you take

then they take you out or they you take

then they take you out or they you take them out again you do something a little

them out again you do something a little

them out again you do something a little bigger then you do that in a movie then

bigger then you do that in a movie then

bigger then you do that in a movie then they come over and then you buy them

they come over and then you buy them

they come over and then you buy them flowers and then you say I love you and

flowers and then you say I love you and

flowers and then you say I love you and one day you wake up in the morning it’s

one day you wake up in the morning it’s

one day you wake up in the morning it’s like you press this belief button you

like you press this belief button you

like you press this belief button you just I I’m in love I don’t know when it

just I I’m in love I don’t know when it

just I I’m in love I don’t know when it happened just clicks and you feel like

happened just clicks and you feel like

happened just clicks and you feel like you belong same thing at work same thing

you belong same thing at work same thing

you belong same thing at work same thing at work it just clicks and you feel like

at work it just clicks and you feel like

at work it just clicks and you feel like you belong because you got enough

you belong because you got enough

you belong because you got enough oxytocin built up in your system we

oxytocin built up in your system we

oxytocin built up in your system we don’t allow this to happen we’re too

don’t allow this to happen we’re too

don’t allow this to happen we’re too busy sending emails we’re too busy

busy sending emails we’re too busy

busy sending emails we’re too busy sending emails the next time you want to

sending emails the next time you want to

sending emails the next time you want to tell somebody something email is

tell somebody something email is

tell somebody something email is fantastic for the exchange of

fantastic for the exchange of

fantastic for the exchange of information right it’s fantastic here’s

information right it’s fantastic here’s

information right it’s fantastic here’s the report you wanted the meetings at

the report you wanted the meetings at

the report you wanted the meetings at four o’clock fantastic what did you

four o’clock fantastic what did you

four o’clock fantastic what did you think of my idea do not reply on an

think of my idea do not reply on an

think of my idea do not reply on an email that’s an emotional question email

email that’s an emotional question email

email that’s an emotional question email is a rational tool you get up from your

is a rational tool you get up from your

is a rational tool you get up from your desk you walk the thirty feet and you

desk you walk the thirty feet and you

desk you walk the thirty feet and you say wanted to tell you what I thought of

say wanted to tell you what I thought of

say wanted to tell you what I thought of your idea and I promise you not only

your idea and I promise you not only

your idea and I promise you not only will that information be better received

will that information be better received

will that information be better received but you will start to create

but you will start to create

but you will start to create relationship because oxytocin starts to

relationship because oxytocin starts to

relationship because oxytocin starts to get released if you can’t get up and

get released if you can’t get up and

get released if you can’t get up and walk thirty feet pick up the telephone

walk thirty feet pick up the telephone

walk thirty feet pick up the telephone I’ve done it it’s an amazing thing you

I’ve done it it’s an amazing thing you

I’ve done it it’s an amazing thing you pick up the phone you go hey they’re

pick up the phone you go hey they’re

pick up the phone you go hey they’re like hey what’s the matter you’re like

like hey what’s the matter you’re like

like hey what’s the matter you’re like no I’m just I’m just replying to your

no I’m just I’m just replying to your

no I’m just I’m just replying to your email

wanted to tell you what I thought what

wanted to tell you what I thought what and people who tell me but I need a

and people who tell me but I need a

and people who tell me but I need a paper trail have the conversation hang

paper trail have the conversation hang

paper trail have the conversation hang up and say just to confirm what we

up and say just to confirm what we

up and say just to confirm what we talked about boom there’s your paper

talked about boom there’s your paper

talked about boom there’s your paper trail the reason we get so many emails

trail the reason we get so many emails

trail the reason we get so many emails is because we reply to them all and

is because we reply to them all and

is because we reply to them all and twelve emails are sent and then somebody

twelve emails are sent and then somebody

twelve emails are sent and then somebody misunderstands something and somebody

misunderstands something and somebody

misunderstands something and somebody gets angry and then you have to pick up

gets angry and then you have to pick up

gets angry and then you have to pick up the phone and deal with it anyway – at

the phone and deal with it anyway – at

the phone and deal with it anyway – at the beginning quicker easier better

the beginning quicker easier better

the beginning quicker easier better biology give your time and give your

biology give your time and give your

biology give your time and give your energy and this is why leadership is

energy and this is why leadership is

energy and this is why leadership is really difficult because you can’t give

really difficult because you can’t give

really difficult because you can’t give it to everyone because you don’t have

it to everyone because you don’t have

it to everyone because you don’t have enough to give to everyone you just

enough to give to everyone you just

enough to give to everyone you just can’t you have to make sure that you can

can’t you have to make sure that you can

can’t you have to make sure that you can trust others to trust others to trust

trust others to trust others to trust

trust others to trust others to trust others to trust others and this is what

others to trust others and this is what

others to trust others and this is what happens in the circle of belonging in

happens in the circle of belonging in

happens in the circle of belonging in the circle of safety this is what

the circle of safety this is what

the circle of safety this is what effective bureaucracy is which is as the

effective bureaucracy is which is as the

effective bureaucracy is which is as the CEO as the leader or whatever your job

CEO as the leader or whatever your job

CEO as the leader or whatever your job is you have one responsibility and one

is you have one responsibility and one

is you have one responsibility and one responsibility only which is to make

responsibility only which is to make

responsibility only which is to make sure the people you know that you have

sure the people you know that you have

sure the people you know that you have physical contact with you know their

physical contact with you know their

physical contact with you know their names

names

names our confident and feel looked after and

our confident and feel looked after and

our confident and feel looked after and encourage them to do the same

encourage them to do the same

encourage them to do the same for the big ones who work beneath them

for the big ones who work beneath them

for the big ones who work beneath them who brew neat work beneath them who work

who brew neat work beneath them who work

who brew neat work beneath them who work beneath them and when this group of

beneath them and when this group of

beneath them and when this group of people really feel safe then they will

people really feel safe then they will

people really feel safe then they will invite in the customer to also feel safe

invite in the customer to also feel safe

invite in the customer to also feel safe they will talk to these people as if

they will talk to these people as if

they will talk to these people as if they are human I actually flew in an

they are human I actually flew in an

they are human I actually flew in an airline recently and I was I was

airline recently and I was I was

airline recently and I was I was appalled at how I was treated it was

appalled at how I was treated it was

appalled at how I was treated it was disgusting I was like cattle right and I

disgusting I was like cattle right and I

disgusting I was like cattle right and I said something I said why do you treat

said something I said why do you treat

said something I said why do you treat people like cattle and she literally

people like cattle and she literally

people like cattle and she literally said to me I’m sorry sir I have to do it

said to me I’m sorry sir I have to do it

said to me I’m sorry sir I have to do it or I’ll lose my job

or I’ll lose my job

or I’ll lose my job what did she tell me my organization

what did she tell me my organization

what did she tell me my organization that I work for it doesn’t make me feel

that I work for it doesn’t make me feel

that I work for it doesn’t make me feel safe I don’t feel like Who I book like I

safe I don’t feel like Who I book like I

safe I don’t feel like Who I book like I belong so I’m gonna treat you like dirt

belong so I’m gonna treat you like dirt

belong so I’m gonna treat you like dirt to protect myself as opposed to somebody

to protect myself as opposed to somebody

to protect myself as opposed to somebody who feel safest says sir I will do

who feel safest says sir I will do

who feel safest says sir I will do everything in my power to make sure that

everything in my power to make sure that

everything in my power to make sure that you feel happy and good because I’m not

you feel happy and good because I’m not

you feel happy and good because I’m not worried that’s called a highly effective

worried that’s called a highly effective

worried that’s called a highly effective organism

organism

organism there’s one more chemical I haven’t told

there’s one more chemical I haven’t told

there’s one more chemical I haven’t told you about the Big C cortisol cortisol is

you about the Big C cortisol cortisol is

you about the Big C cortisol cortisol is the feeling of stress and the feeling of

the feeling of stress and the feeling of

the feeling of stress and the feeling of anxiety we share these chemicals with

anxiety we share these chemicals with

anxiety we share these chemicals with all the social mammals and so when you

all the social mammals and so when you

all the social mammals and so when you see a herd of gizelle you vall seen the

see a herd of gizelle you vall seen the

see a herd of gizelle you vall seen the documentary on discovery or whatever

documentary on discovery or whatever

documentary on discovery or whatever right see a herd of gazelle grazing and

right see a herd of gazelle grazing and

right see a herd of gazelle grazing and one of them thinks they hear a rustle in

one of them thinks they hear a rustle in

one of them thinks they hear a rustle in the grass and they go head right

the grass and they go head right

the grass and they go head right that’s what cortisol does cortisol is

that’s what cortisol does cortisol is

that’s what cortisol does cortisol is designed to keep us alive it is the

designed to keep us alive it is the

designed to keep us alive it is the first stage of fight-or-flight

first stage of fight-or-flight

first stage of fight-or-flight it makes us paranoid it makes all of our

it makes us paranoid it makes all of our

it makes us paranoid it makes all of our senses hyper attuned to look for danger

senses hyper attuned to look for danger

senses hyper attuned to look for danger it injects glucose into our muscles to

it injects glucose into our muscles to

it injects glucose into our muscles to make us stiff and ready to go in case we

make us stiff and ready to go in case we

make us stiff and ready to go in case we need to fight or flight it increases our

need to fight or flight it increases our

need to fight or flight it increases our heart rate like crazy right and it makes

heart rate like crazy right and it makes

heart rate like crazy right and it makes us start looking it makes is paranoid to

us start looking it makes is paranoid to

us start looking it makes is paranoid to find the danger and the cool thing about

find the danger and the cool thing about

find the danger and the cool thing about cortisol when you work in a social

cortisol when you work in a social

cortisol when you work in a social environment is if other people sense

environment is if other people sense

environment is if other people sense that you’re nervous they get nervous so

that you’re nervous they get nervous so

that you’re nervous they get nervous so all the other gazelle go they didn’t

all the other gazelle go they didn’t

all the other gazelle go they didn’t hear anything they just saw Steve over

hear anything they just saw Steve over

hear anything they just saw Steve over there it really freaked out and so they

there it really freaked out and so they

there it really freaked out and so they got all freaked out and now they all

got all freaked out and now they all

got all freaked out and now they all start looking for the danger good system

start looking for the danger good system

start looking for the danger good system and one of them who didn’t even hear the

and one of them who didn’t even hear the

and one of them who didn’t even hear the initial rustle in the grass sees the

initial rustle in the grass sees the

initial rustle in the grass sees the lion runs they all run they all live

lion runs they all run they all live

lion runs they all run they all live another day good system so that when we

another day good system so that when we

another day good system so that when we go to work and somebody says I think

go to work and somebody says I think

go to work and somebody says I think there’s gonna be layoffs all of us are

there’s gonna be layoffs all of us are

there’s gonna be layoffs all of us are like what do you mean wait there’s gonna

like what do you mean wait there’s gonna

like what do you mean wait there’s gonna be we’re all paranoid now we’re all free

be we’re all paranoid now we’re all free

be we’re all paranoid now we’re all free I shouldn’t have talked in that meeting

I shouldn’t have talked in that meeting

I shouldn’t have talked in that meeting we start to get crazy we start to get

we start to get crazy we start to get

we start to get crazy we start to get paranoid our hearts start to race

paranoid our hearts start to race

paranoid our hearts start to race it’s what cortisol does it’s trying to

it’s what cortisol does it’s trying to

it’s what cortisol does it’s trying to keep us alive you wake up in the middle

keep us alive you wake up in the middle

keep us alive you wake up in the middle of the night you hear a bump in the

of the night you hear a bump in the

of the night you hear a bump in the middle of the night huh what’s the first

middle of the night huh what’s the first

middle of the night huh what’s the first thing you do you wake the person next to

thing you do you wake the person next to

thing you do you wake the person next to you and then what do they do they go and

you and then what do they do they go and

you and then what do they do they go and if there’s nothing there you go and

if there’s nothing there you go and

if there’s nothing there you go and trust your eyes right you go looking for

trust your eyes right you go looking for

trust your eyes right you go looking for it we’re visual animals right if there’s

it we’re visual animals right if there’s

it we’re visual animals right if there’s nothing there you go like this

cortisol leaves our body and we relax

cortisol leaves our body and we relax and a heartbeat goes back down cortisol

and a heartbeat goes back down cortisol

and a heartbeat goes back down cortisol to get all of that extra energy to make

to get all of that extra energy to make

to get all of that extra energy to make us paranoid to make us self-interested

us paranoid to make us self-interested

us paranoid to make us self-interested it needs to shut down non-essential

it needs to shut down non-essential

it needs to shut down non-essential systems because it has to get it from

systems because it has to get it from

systems because it has to get it from somewhere right so it shuts off things

somewhere right so it shuts off things

somewhere right so it shuts off things like growth you don’t need your

like growth you don’t need your

like growth you don’t need your fingernails to grow at that moment shuts

fingernails to grow at that moment shuts

fingernails to grow at that moment shuts it off the other thing it shuts off is

it off the other thing it shuts off is

it off the other thing it shuts off is our immune system don’t need it in that

our immune system don’t need it in that

our immune system don’t need it in that moment the problem is you’re not

moment the problem is you’re not

moment the problem is you’re not supposed to have cortisol in your system

supposed to have cortisol in your system

supposed to have cortisol in your system all the time you’re supposed to have it

all the time you’re supposed to have it

all the time you’re supposed to have it in and then gone and when we go to work

in and then gone and when we go to work

in and then gone and when we go to work in a place that doesn’t make us feel

in a place that doesn’t make us feel

in a place that doesn’t make us feel like we belong that doesn’t make us feel

like we belong that doesn’t make us feel

like we belong that doesn’t make us feel safe when we’re at work guess what we

safe when we’re at work guess what we

safe when we’re at work guess what we got little bits of cortisol dripping in

got little bits of cortisol dripping in

got little bits of cortisol dripping in our body drip drip drip drip makes his

our body drip drip drip drip makes his

our body drip drip drip drip makes his paranoid drip I know my boss hates me I

paranoid drip I know my boss hates me I

paranoid drip I know my boss hates me I know he hates me I hate he hates all my

know he hates me I hate he hates all my

know he hates me I hate he hates all my ideas I know it drip drip it makes it

ideas I know it drip drip it makes it

ideas I know it drip drip it makes it self-interested one of the things

self-interested one of the things

self-interested one of the things cortisol does it inhibits the release of

cortisol does it inhibits the release of

cortisol does it inhibits the release of oxytocin biologically if you work in a

oxytocin biologically if you work in a

oxytocin biologically if you work in a high-stress environment where you don’t

high-stress environment where you don’t

high-stress environment where you don’t feel safe you were biologically less

feel safe you were biologically less

feel safe you were biologically less empathetic and less generous we don’t

empathetic and less generous we don’t

empathetic and less generous we don’t care about each other because we’re too

care about each other because we’re too

care about each other because we’re too busy trying to protect ourselves drip

busy trying to protect ourselves drip

busy trying to protect ourselves drip drip drip our immune systems are now

drip drip our immune systems are now

drip drip our immune systems are now compromised drip drip drip we live in

compromised drip drip drip we live in

compromised drip drip drip we live in the country with some of the best

the country with some of the best

the country with some of the best medical education in the world some of

medical education in the world some of

medical education in the world some of the best medical systems in the world

the best medical systems in the world

the best medical systems in the world some of the best doctors in the world

some of the best doctors in the world

some of the best doctors in the world some of the best hospitals in the world

some of the best hospitals in the world

some of the best hospitals in the world some the best medicines in the world

some the best medicines in the world

some the best medicines in the world please explain to me why diabetes is on

please explain to me why diabetes is on

please explain to me why diabetes is on the rise heart disease is on the rise

the rise heart disease is on the rise

the rise heart disease is on the rise some cancers are on the rise it ain’t

some cancers are on the rise it ain’t

some cancers are on the rise it ain’t hot partially hydrogenated oils our jobs

hot partially hydrogenated oils our jobs

hot partially hydrogenated oils our jobs are killing us and the people who

are killing us and the people who

are killing us and the people who responsible are the leaders and we also

responsible are the leaders and we also

responsible are the leaders and we also know that parents who come home stressed

know that parents who come home stressed

know that parents who come home stressed out their kids learn that this is what

out their kids learn that this is what

out their kids learn that this is what work is that work is something that

work is that work is something that

work is that work is something that makes you short-tempered and and unhappy

makes you short-tempered and and unhappy

makes you short-tempered and and unhappy and so they expect it as they grow older

and so they expect it as they grow older

and so they expect it as they grow older worse we know that parents who come home

worse we know that parents who come home

worse we know that parents who come home upset and angry it has such a negative

upset and angry it has such a negative

upset and angry it has such a negative impact on their children that there’s

impact on their children that there’s

impact on their children that there’s some studies that show that they might

some studies that show that they might

some studies that show that they might actually become bullies because of their

actually become bullies because of their

actually become bullies because of their unhappy parents who hate their jobs and

unhappy parents who hate their jobs and

unhappy parents who hate their jobs and have excessive amounts of stress

our companies are literally killing us

our companies are literally killing us so what are you gonna do about it what

so what are you gonna do about it what

so what are you gonna do about it what are gonna do about it

are gonna do about it

are gonna do about it leadership is not a ranked leadership is

leadership is not a ranked leadership is

leadership is not a ranked leadership is not a position leadership is a decision

not a position leadership is a decision

not a position leadership is a decision leadership is a choice it has nothing to

leadership is a choice it has nothing to

leadership is a choice it has nothing to do with your position in the

do with your position in the

do with your position in the organization if you decide to look after

organization if you decide to look after

organization if you decide to look after the person to the left of you and look

the person to the left of you and look

the person to the left of you and look after the person to the right of you you

after the person to the right of you you

after the person to the right of you you have become a leader you’ve seen the

have become a leader you’ve seen the

have become a leader you’ve seen the movie 300 right the Spartans the

movie 300 right the Spartans the

movie 300 right the Spartans the greatest fighting force of all time you

greatest fighting force of all time you

greatest fighting force of all time you want to know one of the things that made

want to know one of the things that made

want to know one of the things that made the Spartans great wasn’t their muscles

the Spartans great wasn’t their muscles

the Spartans great wasn’t their muscles wasn’t their spears it was their shields

wasn’t their spears it was their shields

wasn’t their spears it was their shields they stood shield to shield and the

they stood shield to shield and the

they stood shield to shield and the Phalanx was stronger because they all

Phalanx was stronger because they all

Phalanx was stronger because they all those shields were big and they were

those shields were big and they were

those shields were big and they were told when they were young children you

told when they were young children you

told when they were young children you either bring your shield home or you

either bring your shield home or you

either bring your shield home or you come home on your shield the punishment

come home on your shield the punishment

come home on your shield the punishment for for losing your shield was

for for losing your shield was

for for losing your shield was tremendous in battle because if you lost

tremendous in battle because if you lost

tremendous in battle because if you lost your shield that means you cannot

your shield that means you cannot

your shield that means you cannot protect the person to the left of you

protect the person to the left of you

protect the person to the left of you and the person to the right of you and

and the person to the right of you and

and the person to the right of you and you have destroyed the failings

you have destroyed the failings

you have destroyed the failings it’s the shield that matters not the

it’s the shield that matters not the

it’s the shield that matters not the spear not the spear

spear not the spear

spear not the spear it’s your willingness to sacrifice

it’s your willingness to sacrifice

it’s your willingness to sacrifice yourself not your life maybe your credit

yourself not your life maybe your credit

yourself not your life maybe your credit maybe you’re a little time maybe a

maybe you’re a little time maybe a

maybe you’re a little time maybe a little energy

little energy

little energy maybe you’re tough you know maybe

maybe you’re tough you know maybe

maybe you’re tough you know maybe getting up from your desk and talking to

getting up from your desk and talking to

getting up from your desk and talking to somebody for 30 minutes instead of

somebody for 30 minutes instead of

somebody for 30 minutes instead of sending a three-minute email

sending a three-minute email

sending a three-minute email it’s your willingness to sacrifice for

it’s your willingness to sacrifice for

it’s your willingness to sacrifice for someone to hold that shield up so that

someone to hold that shield up so that

someone to hold that shield up so that they feel safe that makes you a leader

they feel safe that makes you a leader

they feel safe that makes you a leader and you want to know how you beat a

and you want to know how you beat a

and you want to know how you beat a dopamine addiction if you worried that

dopamine addiction if you worried that

dopamine addiction if you worried that you’re addicted to performance and all

you’re addicted to performance and all

you’re addicted to performance and all this dopamine things Alcoholics

this dopamine things Alcoholics

this dopamine things Alcoholics Anonymous has been highly effective for

Anonymous has been highly effective for

Anonymous has been highly effective for decades 80 something years we all know

decades 80 something years we all know

decades 80 something years we all know the first step of the 12 steps we joke

the first step of the 12 steps we joke

the first step of the 12 steps we joke about it right admit you have a problem

about it right admit you have a problem

about it right admit you have a problem did you know the twelfth step don’t say

did you know the twelfth step don’t say

did you know the twelfth step don’t say it’s supposed to be anonymous

I’ll tell you what the 12 step is

I’ll tell you what the 12 step is Alcoholics Anonymous knows that if you

Alcoholics Anonymous knows that if you

Alcoholics Anonymous knows that if you master all 11 steps but not the twelfth

master all 11 steps but not the twelfth

master all 11 steps but not the twelfth you will drink again if you master the

you will drink again if you master the

you will drink again if you master the twelfth step you will beat the disease

twelfth step you will beat the disease

twelfth step you will beat the disease what’s the twelfth step the twelfth step

what’s the twelfth step the twelfth step

what’s the twelfth step the twelfth step is the commitment to help another

is the commitment to help another

is the commitment to help another alcoholic service service to another

alcoholic service service to another

alcoholic service service to another oxytocine wins sera Tosun won’t

oxytocine wins sera Tosun won’t

oxytocine wins sera Tosun won’t serotonin wins the more we look after

serotonin wins the more we look after

serotonin wins the more we look after each other

each other

each other the safer we feel the more we feel like

the safer we feel the more we feel like

the safer we feel the more we feel like we belong and the more we will work

we belong and the more we will work

we belong and the more we will work together to confront the dangers outside

together to confront the dangers outside

together to confront the dangers outside do this for others and others will

do this for others and others will

do this for others and others will become Johnny Bravo

become Johnny Bravo

become Johnny Bravo [Music]