
our minds are designed to stop you at all costs from doing anything that might
all costs from doing anything that might
all costs from doing anything that might hurt you if you notice that you daydream
hurt you if you notice that you daydream
hurt you if you notice that you daydream about being a writer if you notice that
about being a writer if you notice that
about being a writer if you notice that you daydream about starting a tech
you daydream about starting a tech
you daydream about starting a tech company if you notice you daydream about
company if you notice you daydream about
company if you notice you daydream about building bridges follow your curiosity
building bridges follow your curiosity
building bridges follow your curiosity so if it were easy to get what you
so if it were easy to get what you
so if it were easy to get what you wanted in life Google would have already
wanted in life Google would have already
wanted in life Google would have already figured out an app she’s an American
figured out an app she’s an American
figured out an app she’s an American speaker TV personality coach and author
speaker TV personality coach and author
speaker TV personality coach and author her TEDx talk on how to stop screwing
her TEDx talk on how to stop screwing
her TEDx talk on how to stop screwing yourself over has over 10 million views
yourself over has over 10 million views
yourself over has over 10 million views on YouTube her book stop saying you’re
on YouTube her book stop saying you’re
on YouTube her book stop saying you’re fine is a business bestseller
fine is a business bestseller
fine is a business bestseller she’s Mel Robin and here’s my take on
she’s Mel Robin and here’s my take on
she’s Mel Robin and here’s my take on her top ten rules for success also guys
her top ten rules for success also guys
her top ten rules for success also guys as you’re watching if you hear something
as you’re watching if you hear something
as you’re watching if you hear something that really resonates with you please
that really resonates with you please
that really resonates with you please leave it down in the comments below put
leave it down in the comments below put
leave it down in the comments below put quotes around it so other people can be
quotes around it so other people can be
quotes around it so other people can be inspired by your sharing and also when
inspired by your sharing and also when
inspired by your sharing and also when you write it down you’re much more
you write it down you’re much more
you write it down you’re much more likely to lock it into yourself to enjoy
we bought into this this complete
we bought into this this complete falsehood that at some point you’re
falsehood that at some point you’re
falsehood that at some point you’re going to have the courage at some point
going to have the courage at some point
going to have the courage at some point you’re going to have the confidence and
you’re going to have the confidence and
you’re going to have the confidence and it’s total bullshit frankly I don’t
it’s total bullshit frankly I don’t
it’s total bullshit frankly I don’t really like to swear it out okay it’s
really like to swear it out okay it’s
really like to swear it out okay it’s complete garbage and so there are so
complete garbage and so there are so
complete garbage and so there are so many people in the world and and you
many people in the world and and you
many people in the world and and you know you may be watching this right now
know you may be watching this right now
know you may be watching this right now and you have these incredible ideas and
and you have these incredible ideas and
and you have these incredible ideas and what you think is missing is motivation
what you think is missing is motivation
what you think is missing is motivation and that’s not true
and that’s not true
and that’s not true because the way that our minds are wired
because the way that our minds are wired
because the way that our minds are wired and the fact about human beings is that
and the fact about human beings is that
and the fact about human beings is that we are not designed to do things that
we are not designed to do things that
we are not designed to do things that are uncomfortable or scary or difficult
are uncomfortable or scary or difficult
are uncomfortable or scary or difficult our brains are designed to protect us
our brains are designed to protect us
our brains are designed to protect us from those things because our brains are
from those things because our brains are
from those things because our brains are trying to keep us alive and in order to
trying to keep us alive and in order to
trying to keep us alive and in order to change in order to build a business in
change in order to build a business in
change in order to build a business in order to be the best parent of a spouse
order to be the best parent of a spouse
order to be the best parent of a spouse to do all those things that you know you
to do all those things that you know you
to do all those things that you know you want to do with your life with your work
want to do with your life with your work
want to do with your life with your work with your dreams you’re going to have to
with your dreams you’re going to have to
with your dreams you’re going to have to do things that are difficult uncertain
do things that are difficult uncertain
do things that are difficult uncertain or scary which sets up this problem for
or scary which sets up this problem for
or scary which sets up this problem for all of us you’re not going to feel like
all of us you’re not going to feel like
all of us you’re not going to feel like it
it
it motivation is garbage you you only feel
motivation is garbage you you only feel
motivation is garbage you you only feel motivated to do the things that are easy
motivated to do the things that are easy
motivated to do the things that are easy right
right
right what do you think that is oh I know
what do you think that is oh I know
what do you think that is oh I know exactly why that is because I’ve studied
exactly why that is because I’ve studied
exactly why that is because I’ve studied this so much because for me one of the
this so much because for me one of the
this so much because for me one of the hardest things to figure out was why is
hardest things to figure out was why is
hardest things to figure out was why is it so hard to do the little things that
it so hard to do the little things that
it so hard to do the little things that would improve my life and what I’ve come
would improve my life and what I’ve come
would improve my life and what I’ve come to realize and what we’ll talk a lot
to realize and what we’ll talk a lot
to realize and what we’ll talk a lot about today is that the way that our
about today is that the way that our
about today is that the way that our minds are designed is our minds are
minds are designed is our minds are
minds are designed is our minds are designed to stop you at all costs from
designed to stop you at all costs from
designed to stop you at all costs from doing anything that might hurt you and
doing anything that might hurt you and
doing anything that might hurt you and the way that that that that this all
the way that that that that this all
the way that that that that this all happens is it all starts with something
happens is it all starts with something
happens is it all starts with something super subtle that none of us ever catch
super subtle that none of us ever catch
super subtle that none of us ever catch and that is with this habit that all of
and that is with this habit that all of
and that is with this habit that all of us have that nobody’s talking about we
us have that nobody’s talking about we
us have that nobody’s talking about we all have a habit of hesitating hmm we
all have a habit of hesitating hmm we
all have a habit of hesitating hmm we have an idea you’re sitting in a meeting
have an idea you’re sitting in a meeting
have an idea you’re sitting in a meeting you have this incredible idea and
you have this incredible idea and
you have this incredible idea and instead of just
instead of just
instead of just you know saying it you stop and you
you know saying it you stop and you
you know saying it you stop and you hesitate now what none of us realize is
hesitate now what none of us realize is
hesitate now what none of us realize is that when you hesitate to spent moment
that when you hesitate to spent moment
that when you hesitate to spent moment that micro moment that small hesitation
that micro moment that small hesitation
that micro moment that small hesitation it sends a stress signal to your brain
it sends a stress signal to your brain
it sends a stress signal to your brain it wakes your brain up and your brain
it wakes your brain up and your brain
it wakes your brain up and your brain all of a sudden goes oh wait a minute
all of a sudden goes oh wait a minute
all of a sudden goes oh wait a minute why is he hesitating he didn’t hesitate
why is he hesitating he didn’t hesitate
why is he hesitating he didn’t hesitate when he put on his killer spiky sneakers
when he put on his killer spiky sneakers
when he put on his killer spiky sneakers he didn’t hesitate with the really cool
he didn’t hesitate with the really cool
he didn’t hesitate with the really cool track pants he didn’t hesitate with the
track pants he didn’t hesitate with the
track pants he didn’t hesitate with the NASA tee shirt now he’s hesitating to
NASA tee shirt now he’s hesitating to
NASA tee shirt now he’s hesitating to talk something must be up so then your
talk something must be up so then your
talk something must be up so then your brain goes to work to protect you it has
brain goes to work to protect you it has
brain goes to work to protect you it has a million different ways to protect you
a million different ways to protect you
a million different ways to protect you one of them is called the spotlight
one of them is called the spotlight
one of them is called the spotlight effect it’s a known phenomenon where
effect it’s a known phenomenon where
effect it’s a known phenomenon where your brain magnifies risk why to pull
your brain magnifies risk why to pull
your brain magnifies risk why to pull you away from something that it
you away from something that it
you away from something that it perceives to be a problem and so you can
perceives to be a problem and so you can
perceives to be a problem and so you can truly trace every single problem or
truly trace every single problem or
truly trace every single problem or complaint in your life to silence and
complaint in your life to silence and
complaint in your life to silence and hesitation those are decisions and what
hesitation those are decisions and what
hesitation those are decisions and what I do and what’s changed my life is
I do and what’s changed my life is
I do and what’s changed my life is waking up and realizing that motivation
waking up and realizing that motivation
waking up and realizing that motivation is garbage I’m never going to feel like
is garbage I’m never going to feel like
is garbage I’m never going to feel like doing the things that are tough for
doing the things that are tough for
doing the things that are tough for difficult or uncertain or scary or new
difficult or uncertain or scary or new
difficult or uncertain or scary or new so I need to stop waiting until I feel
so I need to stop waiting until I feel
so I need to stop waiting until I feel like it and number two I am one decision
like it and number two I am one decision
like it and number two I am one decision away from a totally different marriage a
away from a totally different marriage a
away from a totally different marriage a totally different life a totally
totally different life a totally
totally different life a totally different job a totally different income
different job a totally different income
different job a totally different income a totally different relationship with my
a totally different relationship with my
a totally different relationship with my kids
kids
kids not like one decision I’m divorcing you
not like one decision I’m divorcing you
not like one decision I’m divorcing you in in the marriage example but one
in in the marriage example but one
in in the marriage example but one decision on you know you could be having
decision on you know you could be having
decision on you know you could be having a conversation with your spouse and you
a conversation with your spouse and you
a conversation with your spouse and you feel your emotions rise up and within a
feel your emotions rise up and within a
feel your emotions rise up and within a tiny window those emotions can take over
tiny window those emotions can take over
tiny window those emotions can take over and can impact how your marriage goes or
and can impact how your marriage goes or
and can impact how your marriage goes or you can learn how to take control of
you can learn how to take control of
you can learn how to take control of that micro moment and make a decision to
that micro moment and make a decision to
that micro moment and make a decision to act in a way that actually shifts your
act in a way that actually shifts your
act in a way that actually shifts your marriage your life comes down to your
marriage your life comes down to your
marriage your life comes down to your decisions and if you change your
decisions and if you change your
decisions and if you change your decisions you will change everything
decisions you will change everything
decisions you will change everything when I was 22 right after I graduated
when I was 22 right after I graduated
when I was 22 right after I graduated from Dartmouth I was so focused on
from Dartmouth I was so focused on
from Dartmouth I was so focused on making everyone happy that I almost
making everyone happy that I almost
making everyone happy that I almost chose the worst possible career for my
chose the worst possible career for my
chose the worst possible career for my personality it’s not a bad career it
personality it’s not a bad career it
personality it’s not a bad career it just would have been horrendous for me I
just would have been horrendous for me I
just would have been horrendous for me I was interested in the environment so I
was interested in the environment so I
was interested in the environment so I decided oh yeah
decided oh yeah
decided oh yeah I’ll go get a law degree and then I’ll
I’ll go get a law degree and then I’ll
I’ll go get a law degree and then I’ll go work in Washington and I think maybe
go work in Washington and I think maybe
go work in Washington and I think maybe I’ll work on environmental policy and
I’ll work on environmental policy and
I’ll work on environmental policy and I’d probably end up in some cube farm
I’d probably end up in some cube farm
I’d probably end up in some cube farm and everyone was thrilled with the plan
and everyone was thrilled with the plan
and everyone was thrilled with the plan everyone it turns out but me so here I
everyone it turns out but me so here I
everyone it turns out but me so here I am I’m driving a u-haul across country
am I’m driving a u-haul across country
am I’m driving a u-haul across country to go to law school and to get a degree
to go to law school and to get a degree
to go to law school and to get a degree in environmental law and something
in environmental law and something
in environmental law and something started to gnaw at me and with every
started to gnaw at me and with every
started to gnaw at me and with every single mile that I drove my thoughts
single mile that I drove my thoughts
single mile that I drove my thoughts were getting louder and doubts were
were getting louder and doubts were
were getting louder and doubts were starting to pour in my gut was telling
starting to pour in my gut was telling
starting to pour in my gut was telling me Mel
me Mel
me Mel turn the damn u-haul around but the
turn the damn u-haul around but the
turn the damn u-haul around but the problem was that everything was already
problem was that everything was already
problem was that everything was already in place right I mean I’m already in the
in place right I mean I’m already in the
in place right I mean I’m already in the u-haul the thing is already packed I’m
u-haul the thing is already packed I’m
u-haul the thing is already packed I’m already 10 miles into my drive the
already 10 miles into my drive the
already 10 miles into my drive the tuition had been paid for the first
tuition had been paid for the first
tuition had been paid for the first semester I had signed a lease I mean I
semester I had signed a lease I mean I
semester I had signed a lease I mean I could not undo these things
could not undo these things
could not undo these things isn’t that why it’s so difficult for you
isn’t that why it’s so difficult for you
isn’t that why it’s so difficult for you to make changes in your life because you
to make changes in your life because you
to make changes in your life because you think that things can’t be undone the
think that things can’t be undone the
think that things can’t be undone the fact is any excuse that you come up with
fact is any excuse that you come up with
fact is any excuse that you come up with you can undo tuition can be reimbursed
you can undo tuition can be reimbursed
you can undo tuition can be reimbursed apartments can be leased Plan B can be
apartments can be leased Plan B can be
apartments can be leased Plan B can be invented so I got up I repack that
invented so I got up I repack that
invented so I got up I repack that u-haul and I drove out of town
u-haul and I drove out of town
u-haul and I drove out of town I let myself make a u-turn in life if
I let myself make a u-turn in life if
I let myself make a u-turn in life if you ever find your gut battling your
you ever find your gut battling your
you ever find your gut battling your head save yourself the drama I guarantee
head save yourself the drama I guarantee
head save yourself the drama I guarantee you your gut is right guarantee you your
you your gut is right guarantee you your
you your gut is right guarantee you your excuses can be undone and I guarantee
excuses can be undone and I guarantee
excuses can be undone and I guarantee you you can make a u-turn in your life
you you can make a u-turn in your life
you you can make a u-turn in your life right now if you want to you can be
right now if you want to you can be
right now if you want to you can be asking for assignments that are above
asking for assignments that are above
asking for assignments that are above your level so there’s work that you do
your level so there’s work that you do
your level so there’s work that you do at your level and then there’s work that
at your level and then there’s work that
at your level and then there’s work that you do above your level and the only way
you do above your level and the only way
you do above your level and the only way that you’re going to be promoted to do
that you’re going to be promoted to do
that you’re going to be promoted to do work above your level is a if you can
work above your level is a if you can
work above your level is a if you can demonstrate that you’re capable of doing
demonstrate that you’re capable of doing
demonstrate that you’re capable of doing the work at your level and B if you are
the work at your level and B if you are
the work at your level and B if you are proactive in seeking out opportunities
proactive in seeking out opportunities
proactive in seeking out opportunities that expand your capability and give you
that expand your capability and give you
that expand your capability and give you a give you a chance to work above the
a give you a chance to work above the
a give you a chance to work above the level that you’re at nothing’s going to
level that you’re at nothing’s going to
level that you’re at nothing’s going to happen unless you take that initial
happen unless you take that initial
happen unless you take that initial action nothing’s going to happen
action nothing’s going to happen
action nothing’s going to happen nothing’s going to change unless you put
nothing’s going to change unless you put
nothing’s going to change unless you put down that pen in the meeting and you sit
down that pen in the meeting and you sit
down that pen in the meeting and you sit up and you pay attention
up and you pay attention
up and you pay attention you listen for your opportunity to speak
you listen for your opportunity to speak
you listen for your opportunity to speak nothing’s going to happen unless you
nothing’s going to happen unless you
nothing’s going to happen unless you push yourself to go in and make the ask
push yourself to go in and make the ask
push yourself to go in and make the ask for that assignment that scares you to
for that assignment that scares you to
for that assignment that scares you to death one night Chris had gone to bed
death one night Chris had gone to bed
death one night Chris had gone to bed I’ve been struggling struggling
I’ve been struggling struggling
I’ve been struggling struggling struggling we still had all the same
struggling we still had all the same
struggling we still had all the same problems I we stalled a lien on the
problems I we stalled a lien on the
problems I we stalled a lien on the house still facing bankruptcy still
house still facing bankruptcy still
house still facing bankruptcy still fighting like crazy I was still
fighting like crazy I was still
fighting like crazy I was still unemployed
unemployed
unemployed he still they still haven’t figured out
he still they still haven’t figured out
he still they still haven’t figured out like the solution yet for the business
like the solution yet for the business
like the solution yet for the business and I was about to turn off the TV and
and I was about to turn off the TV and
and I was about to turn off the TV and there on the the TV there was this
there on the the TV there was this
there on the the TV there was this rocket launching and I thought oh my
rocket launching and I thought oh my
rocket launching and I thought oh my gosh you dick I am going to launch
gosh you dick I am going to launch
gosh you dick I am going to launch myself out of bed like a rocket ship
myself out of bed like a rocket ship
myself out of bed like a rocket ship like NASA right here and launch me out
like NASA right here and launch me out
like NASA right here and launch me out of that bed and I’m going to move so
of that bed and I’m going to move so
of that bed and I’m going to move so fast that I don’t think I’m going to
fast that I don’t think I’m going to
fast that I don’t think I’m going to beat my brain now here’s a really
beat my brain now here’s a really
beat my brain now here’s a really interesting point I talk a lot about
interesting point I talk a lot about
interesting point I talk a lot about your instincts and inner wisdom and we
your instincts and inner wisdom and we
your instincts and inner wisdom and we can get into this a little bit later but
can get into this a little bit later but
can get into this a little bit later but a lot of us talk about the fact that you
a lot of us talk about the fact that you
a lot of us talk about the fact that you have a gut feeling but what all this
have a gut feeling but what all this
have a gut feeling but what all this research that I’ve done through the book
research that I’ve done through the book
research that I’ve done through the book and all the speaking that I do what I’ve
and all the speaking that I do what I’ve
and all the speaking that I do what I’ve discovered that’s fascinating is
discovered that’s fascinating is
discovered that’s fascinating is actually when you set goals when you
actually when you set goals when you
actually when you set goals when you have an intention on something that you
have an intention on something that you
have an intention on something that you want to change about your life your
want to change about your life your
want to change about your life your brain helps you what it does is it opens
brain helps you what it does is it opens
brain helps you what it does is it opens up a checklist and then your brain goes
up a checklist and then your brain goes
up a checklist and then your brain goes to work trying to remind you yeah of
to work trying to remind you yeah of
to work trying to remind you yeah of that intention that you set and it’s
that intention that you set and it’s
that intention that you set and it’s really important to develop the skill
really important to develop the skill
really important to develop the skill and I say that word purposefully the
and I say that word purposefully the
and I say that word purposefully the skill of knowing how to hear that inner
skill of knowing how to hear that inner
skill of knowing how to hear that inner wisdom and that intention kicking in and
wisdom and that intention kicking in and
wisdom and that intention kicking in and leaning into it quickly so for me my
leaning into it quickly so for me my
leaning into it quickly so for me my brain saying that’s it right there move
brain saying that’s it right there move
brain saying that’s it right there move as fast as a rocket Mel I wanted to
as fast as a rocket Mel I wanted to
as fast as a rocket Mel I wanted to change my life and I think most people
change my life and I think most people
change my life and I think most people that are miserable or that are that are
that are miserable or that are that are
that are miserable or that are that are really like dying to be great and dying
really like dying to be great and dying
really like dying to be great and dying to have more we want to change we want
to have more we want to change we want
to have more we want to change we want to live a better life we want to create
to live a better life we want to create
to live a better life we want to create more for our families we want to be
more for our families we want to be
more for our families we want to be happier
happier
happier the desire is there again it’s about how
the desire is there again it’s about how
the desire is there again it’s about how do you go from knowledge to action so
do you go from knowledge to action so
do you go from knowledge to action so the first thing in the story
the first thing in the story
the first thing in the story it’s important is realizing that the
it’s important is realizing that the
it’s important is realizing that the answer was in me and my mind was telling
answer was in me and my mind was telling
answer was in me and my mind was telling me pay attention could have also been a
me pay attention could have also been a
me pay attention could have also been a bourbon that is that night anyway the
bourbon that is that night anyway the
bourbon that is that night anyway the next morning the alarm goes off and I
next morning the alarm goes off and I
next morning the alarm goes off and I pretended NASA was there
pretended NASA was there
pretended NASA was there it’s a stupidest story I literally went
it’s a stupidest story I literally went
it’s a stupidest story I literally went 5 4 3 2 1 I counted out loud and then I
5 4 3 2 1 I counted out loud and then I
5 4 3 2 1 I counted out loud and then I stood up and I’ll never forget standing
stood up and I’ll never forget standing
stood up and I’ll never forget standing there in my bedroom it was dark it was
there in my bedroom it was dark it was
there in my bedroom it was dark it was cold it was winter in Boston and for the
cold it was winter in Boston and for the
cold it was winter in Boston and for the first time in 3 months I had beaten my
first time in 3 months I had beaten my
first time in 3 months I had beaten my habit of hitting the snooze button I
habit of hitting the snooze button I
habit of hitting the snooze button I couldn’t believe it and I thought wait a
couldn’t believe it and I thought wait a
couldn’t believe it and I thought wait a minute
minute
minute counting backwards that is the dumbest
counting backwards that is the dumbest
counting backwards that is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life
thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life
thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life well the next morning I used it again
well the next morning I used it again
well the next morning I used it again and it worked the next morning I used it
and it worked the next morning I used it
and it worked the next morning I used it again and it worked the next morning I
again and it worked the next morning I
again and it worked the next morning I used it again and it worked and then I
used it again and it worked and then I
used it again and it worked and then I started to notice something really
started to notice something really
started to notice something really interesting there were moments all day
interesting there were moments all day
interesting there were moments all day long all day long just like that
long all day long just like that
long all day long just like that five-second moment in bed where I knew
five-second moment in bed where I knew
five-second moment in bed where I knew knowledge what I should do and if I
knowledge what I should do and if I
knowledge what I should do and if I didn’t move within five seconds my brain
didn’t move within five seconds my brain
didn’t move within five seconds my brain would step in and talk me out of it
would step in and talk me out of it
would step in and talk me out of it every human being has a five-second
every human being has a five-second
every human being has a five-second window might even be shorter for you you
window might even be shorter for you you
window might even be shorter for you you have about a five-second window in which
have about a five-second window in which
have about a five-second window in which you can move from idea to action before
you can move from idea to action before
you can move from idea to action before your brain kicks into full gear and
your brain kicks into full gear and
your brain kicks into full gear and sabotages any change in behavior because
sabotages any change in behavior because
sabotages any change in behavior because remember your brain is wired to stop you
remember your brain is wired to stop you
remember your brain is wired to stop you from doing things that are uncomfortable
from doing things that are uncomfortable
from doing things that are uncomfortable or uncertain or scary it’s your job to
or uncertain or scary it’s your job to
or uncertain or scary it’s your job to learn how to move from those ideas that
learn how to move from those ideas that
learn how to move from those ideas that could change everything into acting on I
could change everything into acting on I
could change everything into acting on I think you have to be really in tune with
think you have to be really in tune with
think you have to be really in tune with your impulses and with your natural
your impulses and with your natural
your impulses and with your natural state of curiosity and your curiosity
state of curiosity and your curiosity
state of curiosity and your curiosity and the things that you’re naturally
and the things that you’re naturally
and the things that you’re naturally drawn toward that’s the guy if you could
drawn toward that’s the guy if you could
drawn toward that’s the guy if you could spend hours singing if you could spend
spend hours singing if you could spend
spend hours singing if you could spend hours baking if you could spend hours
hours baking if you could spend hours
hours baking if you could spend hours writing if you could spend hours
writing if you could spend hours
writing if you could spend hours learning code
learning code
learning code that’s a huge signal that that’s
that’s a huge signal that that’s
that’s a huge signal that that’s something that you’re really innately
something that you’re really innately
something that you’re really innately interested in and so if you’re curious
interested in and so if you’re curious
interested in and so if you’re curious about something if you notice that you
about something if you notice that you
about something if you notice that you daydream about being a writer if you
daydream about being a writer if you
daydream about being a writer if you notice that you daydream about starting
notice that you daydream about starting
notice that you daydream about starting a tech company if you notice you
a tech company if you notice you
a tech company if you notice you daydream about building bridges follow
daydream about building bridges follow
daydream about building bridges follow your curiosity and you can do that a
your curiosity and you can do that a
your curiosity and you can do that a number of ways
number of ways
number of ways first of all google it there are
first of all google it there are
first of all google it there are millions and millions of pages out there
millions and millions of pages out there
millions and millions of pages out there on the web that are related to what
on the web that are related to what
on the web that are related to what you’re interested in
you’re interested in
you’re interested in secondly find an online course most of
secondly find an online course most of
secondly find an online course most of the major universities are offering our
the major universities are offering our
the major universities are offering our courses online for free third buy a book
courses online for free third buy a book
courses online for free third buy a book about it put yourself in a collision
about it put yourself in a collision
about it put yourself in a collision course with the thing that you’re
course with the thing that you’re
course with the thing that you’re curious about and you will get closer
curious about and you will get closer
curious about and you will get closer and closer and closer to figuring it out
and closer and closer to figuring it out
and closer and closer to figuring it out what about when someone can’t realize or
what about when someone can’t realize or
what about when someone can’t realize or identify their own negative feelings
identify their own negative feelings
identify their own negative feelings someone that has been conditioned to
someone that has been conditioned to
someone that has been conditioned to with and negative feelings and believe
with and negative feelings and believe
with and negative feelings and believe that that’s normal this question comes
that that’s normal this question comes
that that’s normal this question comes from basavanna Anegada it is your normal
from basavanna Anegada it is your normal
from basavanna Anegada it is your normal you’re right it’s a really personal I’m
you’re right it’s a really personal I’m
you’re right it’s a really personal I’m sorry that that’s been your experience
sorry that that’s been your experience
sorry that that’s been your experience of life because that really stinks and
of life because that really stinks and
of life because that really stinks and it doesn’t have to be that way but here
it doesn’t have to be that way but here
it doesn’t have to be that way but here here’s where I want you to go what’s
here’s where I want you to go what’s
here’s where I want you to go what’s interesting about what you said is the
interesting about what you said is the
interesting about what you said is the fact that these feelings are normal okay
fact that these feelings are normal okay
fact that these feelings are normal okay normal just means you’re used to them
normal just means you’re used to them
normal just means you’re used to them but you don’t have to live with them so
but you don’t have to live with them so
but you don’t have to live with them so even though you’re so used to these
even though you’re so used to these
even though you’re so used to these negative feelings and these feelings of
negative feelings and these feelings of
negative feelings and these feelings of doubt you still don’t like them you
doubt you still don’t like them you
doubt you still don’t like them you still have the ability to stop that so I
still have the ability to stop that so I
still have the ability to stop that so I want you to think of a moment in time
want you to think of a moment in time
want you to think of a moment in time when we were really happy like it could
when we were really happy like it could
when we were really happy like it could be a memory from being little it could
be a memory from being little it could
be a memory from being little it could be something that you dream of doing and
be something that you dream of doing and
be something that you dream of doing and I want you to come up with something
I want you to come up with something
I want you to come up with something really specific about that moment okay
really specific about that moment okay
really specific about that moment okay like think about what you’re wearing or
like think about what you’re wearing or
like think about what you’re wearing or think about the blue sky that is going
think about the blue sky that is going
think about the blue sky that is going to be what I call your anchor sauce
to be what I call your anchor sauce
to be what I call your anchor sauce every time from this moment forward that
every time from this moment forward that
every time from this moment forward that you wake up or you find yourself
you wake up or you find yourself
you wake up or you find yourself drifting to those normal feelings of I’m
drifting to those normal feelings of I’m
drifting to those normal feelings of I’m a loser I’m worthless
a loser I’m worthless
a loser I’m worthless I’m never going to find love they may be
I’m never going to find love they may be
I’m never going to find love they may be things that you’re used to thinking but
things that you’re used to thinking but
things that you’re used to thinking but that doesn’t that doesn’t matter because
that doesn’t that doesn’t matter because
that doesn’t that doesn’t matter because you can change it the second that you
you can change it the second that you
you can change it the second that you feel that you’ve drifted over into that
feel that you’ve drifted over into that
feel that you’ve drifted over into that thought and I keep coming over here
thought and I keep coming over here
thought and I keep coming over here because when you start using the rule
because when you start using the rule
because when you start using the rule you’re going to start to literally feel
you’re going to start to literally feel
you’re going to start to literally feel which part of your mind you’re using the
which part of your mind you’re using the
which part of your mind you’re using the worries kind of happened here I want you
worries kind of happened here I want you
worries kind of happened here I want you to 5 4 3 2 1 and then I want you to
to 5 4 3 2 1 and then I want you to
to 5 4 3 2 1 and then I want you to insert this vision of yourself this
insert this vision of yourself this
insert this vision of yourself this vision of yourself where you felt really
vision of yourself where you felt really
vision of yourself where you felt really good and if you can’t think of one
good and if you can’t think of one
good and if you can’t think of one invent one how would you feel if you
invent one how would you feel if you
invent one how would you feel if you were in love how would you feel if you
were in love how would you feel if you
were in love how would you feel if you loved yourself how would you feel if you
loved yourself how would you feel if you
loved yourself how would you feel if you did that thing that you’re scared of it
did that thing that you’re scared of it
did that thing that you’re scared of it keep talking yourself out of that’s your
keep talking yourself out of that’s your
keep talking yourself out of that’s your anchor thought now when you first start
anchor thought now when you first start
anchor thought now when you first start using the rule particularly when you’re
using the rule particularly when you’re
using the rule particularly when you’re breaking a habit a habit of thinking
breaking a habit a habit of thinking
breaking a habit a habit of thinking negative thoughts when you first start
negative thoughts when you first start
negative thoughts when you first start doing it you may need to use the
doing it you may need to use the
doing it you may need to use the five-second rule 73 times in one day
five-second rule 73 times in one day
five-second rule 73 times in one day that’s okay I had to do it like that
that’s okay I had to do it like that
that’s okay I had to do it like that when I was first using the rule to cure
when I was first using the rule to cure
when I was first using the rule to cure myself anxiety when I would start to
myself anxiety when I would start to
myself anxiety when I would start to worry about anything I’d start to worry
worry about anything I’d start to worry
worry about anything I’d start to worry about you know my kids or I start to
about you know my kids or I start to
about you know my kids or I start to worry about money and I feel my thoughts
worry about money and I feel my thoughts
worry about money and I feel my thoughts drift and then I start to feel my heart
drift and then I start to feel my heart
drift and then I start to feel my heart race I would stabilize my thoughts by 4
race I would stabilize my thoughts by 4
race I would stabilize my thoughts by 4 3 2 1 I’ve activate my free frontal
3 2 1 I’ve activate my free frontal
3 2 1 I’ve activate my free frontal cortex lower the the worries you know on
cortex lower the the worries you know on
cortex lower the the worries you know on the other side and then I would start to
the other side and then I would start to
the other side and then I would start to think about something that actually made
think about something that actually made
think about something that actually made me feel really calm or excited that is
me feel really calm or excited that is
me feel really calm or excited that is the battle of your mind and you know the
the battle of your mind and you know the
the battle of your mind and you know the other thing about normal that I just
other thing about normal that I just
other thing about normal that I just want to say is that the reason why it
want to say is that the reason why it
want to say is that the reason why it feels normal to doubt yourself and to
feels normal to doubt yourself and to
feels normal to doubt yourself and to have low self-worth is because you’ve
have low self-worth is because you’ve
have low self-worth is because you’ve thought this so long it’s become a
thought this so long it’s become a
thought this so long it’s become a pattern just like chewing your nails
pattern just like chewing your nails
pattern just like chewing your nails becomes a pattern of behavior that you
becomes a pattern of behavior that you
becomes a pattern of behavior that you don’t think about well the cool thing is
don’t think about well the cool thing is
don’t think about well the cool thing is is that based on science you can
is that based on science you can
is that based on science you can actually change any pattern
actually change any pattern
actually change any pattern thinking one so use the five-second rule
thinking one so use the five-second rule
thinking one so use the five-second rule every single time you catch yourself
every single time you catch yourself
every single time you catch yourself think of the nasty stuff and then
think of the nasty stuff and then
think of the nasty stuff and then activate your prefrontal cortex and
activate your prefrontal cortex and
activate your prefrontal cortex and force yourself to think something
force yourself to think something
force yourself to think something positive every single morning Monday
positive every single morning Monday
positive every single morning Monday through Fridays at 9 a.m. I host a live
through Fridays at 9 a.m. I host a live
through Fridays at 9 a.m. I host a live call-in radio show on Sirius satellite
call-in radio show on Sirius satellite
call-in radio show on Sirius satellite radio it’s called make it happen with
radio it’s called make it happen with
radio it’s called make it happen with Mel Robbins and the thing that’s been so
Mel Robbins and the thing that’s been so
Mel Robbins and the thing that’s been so crazy about that show is every single
crazy about that show is every single
crazy about that show is every single person that calls me on that show they
person that calls me on that show they
person that calls me on that show they call in because they’re feeling stuck in
call in because they’re feeling stuck in
call in because they’re feeling stuck in their lives and they’re resigned about
their lives and they’re resigned about
their lives and they’re resigned about their ability to change their lives and
their ability to change their lives and
their ability to change their lives and I’m not talking about people that are
I’m not talking about people that are
I’m not talking about people that are nuts I’m talking about successful people
nuts I’m talking about successful people
nuts I’m talking about successful people like you and me that just somehow got
like you and me that just somehow got
like you and me that just somehow got stuck in their lives and I’m not talking
stuck in their lives and I’m not talking
stuck in their lives and I’m not talking about feel that are looking for cheesy
about feel that are looking for cheesy
about feel that are looking for cheesy self-help I’m talking about people that
self-help I’m talking about people that
self-help I’m talking about people that really want to figure out how to move
really want to figure out how to move
really want to figure out how to move themselves forward and you know I find
themselves forward and you know I find
themselves forward and you know I find that so many of us think that our dreams
that so many of us think that our dreams
that so many of us think that our dreams are unreachable or unrealistic and it’s
are unreachable or unrealistic and it’s
are unreachable or unrealistic and it’s just so sad I mean people think that
just so sad I mean people think that
just so sad I mean people think that their dreams disappear and if that’s
their dreams disappear and if that’s
their dreams disappear and if that’s what you think congratulations you’re
what you think congratulations you’re
what you think congratulations you’re officially stuck and the truth is that
officially stuck and the truth is that
officially stuck and the truth is that our dreams are always there and they
our dreams are always there and they
our dreams are always there and they don’t ever give up on us we give up on
don’t ever give up on us we give up on
don’t ever give up on us we give up on them but here’s the secret if you just
them but here’s the secret if you just
them but here’s the secret if you just force yourself and I mean force because
force yourself and I mean force because
force yourself and I mean force because I know damn well none of you want to do
I know damn well none of you want to do
I know damn well none of you want to do anything about this and I also know
anything about this and I also know
anything about this and I also know you’re sitting there like yeah the
you’re sitting there like yeah the
you’re sitting there like yeah the self-help crap this isn’t for me but if
self-help crap this isn’t for me but if
self-help crap this isn’t for me but if you just force yourself to take a couple
you just force yourself to take a couple
you just force yourself to take a couple small steps there’s always a surprise
small steps there’s always a surprise
small steps there’s always a surprise let’s talk about Starbucks Starbucks in
let’s talk about Starbucks Starbucks in
let’s talk about Starbucks Starbucks in 2008 very interesting thing happened and
2008 very interesting thing happened and
2008 very interesting thing happened and many of you if you were in the financial
many of you if you were in the financial
many of you if you were in the financial services market then probably know this
services market then probably know this
services market then probably know this that their net income decreased by about
that their net income decreased by about
that their net income decreased by about 28% that year and at the time they had
28% that year and at the time they had
28% that year and at the time they had 16,000 stores in 44 countries and they
16,000 stores in 44 countries and they
16,000 stores in 44 countries and they had gone through this massive explosive
had gone through this massive explosive
had gone through this massive explosive growth segment in terms of going from
growth segment in terms of going from
growth segment in terms of going from going public in I think it was like 1992
going public in I think it was like 1992
going public in I think it was like 1992 they only had 125 stores and now here we
they only had 125 stores and now here we
they only had 125 stores and now here we are 2008 that got 16,000 so what ends up
are 2008 that got 16,000 so what ends up
are 2008 that got 16,000 so what ends up happening
happening
happening is Howard Schultz who is the chairman of
is Howard Schultz who is the chairman of
is Howard Schultz who is the chairman of the board comes back in as the CEO very
the board comes back in as the CEO very
the board comes back in as the CEO very complex situation right
complex situation right
complex situation right you’ve got operations in 44 countries
you’ve got operations in 44 countries
you’ve got operations in 44 countries you’ve got massive reduction in terms of
you’ve got massive reduction in terms of
you’ve got massive reduction in terms of the profits that you have you’ve got the
the profits that you have you’ve got the
the profits that you have you’ve got the stock market and Wall Street screaming
stock market and Wall Street screaming
stock market and Wall Street screaming at you you’ve got customers that are
at you you’ve got customers that are
at you you’ve got customers that are going to Dunkin Donuts because there’s a
going to Dunkin Donuts because there’s a
going to Dunkin Donuts because there’s a recession that’s fitting so what do you
recession that’s fitting so what do you
recession that’s fitting so what do you do well he was very clear again back to
do well he was very clear again back to
do well he was very clear again back to the two rules what do I stand for like
the two rules what do I stand for like
the two rules what do I stand for like what is it what is what am i doing and
what is it what is what am i doing and
what is it what is what am i doing and what do I want the outcome today so he
what do I want the outcome today so he
what do I want the outcome today so he was very clear that what he stood for as
was very clear that what he stood for as
was very clear that what he stood for as a leader and what Starbucks should stand
a leader and what Starbucks should stand
a leader and what Starbucks should stand for is the Starbucks experience he
for is the Starbucks experience he
for is the Starbucks experience he wanted to go back to the beginning and
wanted to go back to the beginning and
wanted to go back to the beginning and reintroduce people to the romance of
reintroduce people to the romance of
reintroduce people to the romance of having a cup of coffee because you know
having a cup of coffee because you know
having a cup of coffee because you know that’s how Starbucks launched in the
that’s how Starbucks launched in the
that’s how Starbucks launched in the beginning that he was traveling and was
beginning that he was traveling and was
beginning that he was traveling and was over in Italy and was like God why don’t
over in Italy and was like God why don’t
over in Italy and was like God why don’t we in places like these great stops to
we in places like these great stops to
we in places like these great stops to have a little cup of coffee over in the
have a little cup of coffee over in the
have a little cup of coffee over in the United States
United States
United States boom Starbucks an idea it’s born it’s
boom Starbucks an idea it’s born it’s
boom Starbucks an idea it’s born it’s launched so he decides he’s going to do
launched so he decides he’s going to do
launched so he decides he’s going to do whatever he can to get the romance of
whatever he can to get the romance of
whatever he can to get the romance of having a cup of coffee back in life in
having a cup of coffee back in life in
having a cup of coffee back in life in any situation whether you’re talking
any situation whether you’re talking
any situation whether you’re talking about growing your company growing your
about growing your company growing your
about growing your company growing your bank account getting in a relationship
bank account getting in a relationship
bank account getting in a relationship getting out of a relationship getting
getting out of a relationship getting
getting out of a relationship getting something done at the school system that
something done at the school system that
something done at the school system that your kids are going to on behalf of your
your kids are going to on behalf of your
your kids are going to on behalf of your kids whatever it is that you’re up to in
kids whatever it is that you’re up to in
kids whatever it is that you’re up to in life this is the only question that you
life this is the only question that you
life this is the only question that you need to ask yourself what is it that I
need to ask yourself what is it that I
need to ask yourself what is it that I want because the truth of the matter is
want because the truth of the matter is
want because the truth of the matter is if you can answer that you can have it
if you can answer that you can have it
if you can answer that you can have it so if it were easy to get what you
so if it were easy to get what you
so if it were easy to get what you wanted in life Google would have already
wanted in life Google would have already
wanted in life Google would have already figured out an app you would just type
figured out an app you would just type
figured out an app you would just type in okay I’m a student and I want to go
in okay I’m a student and I want to go
in okay I’m a student and I want to go from being a student to being successful
from being a student to being successful
from being a student to being successful and Google would tell you go to college
and Google would tell you go to college
and Google would tell you go to college then you get your masters then you land
then you get your masters then you land
then you get your masters then you land this killer job and then you put in a
this killer job and then you put in a
this killer job and then you put in a bunch of FaceTime while you’re checking
bunch of FaceTime while you’re checking
bunch of FaceTime while you’re checking Facebook then you get promoted to
Facebook then you get promoted to
Facebook then you get promoted to manager and then you realize managing
manager and then you realize managing
manager and then you realize managing people kind of thinks and then you keep
people kind of thinks and then you keep
people kind of thinks and then you keep climbing the corporate ladder and then
climbing the corporate ladder and then
climbing the corporate ladder and then you start to wonder well how did I end
you start to wonder well how did I end
you start to wonder well how did I end up here
up here
up here anyways this what success looks like
anyways this what success looks like
anyways this what success looks like you’re like no I’m going to go to Jay
you’re like no I’m going to go to Jay
you’re like no I’m going to go to Jay hilburn that’s what success looks like
so keep this in mind if there’s
so keep this in mind if there’s something that you want like seven
something that you want like seven
something that you want like seven people or a trip to Africa or you’re
people or a trip to Africa or you’re
people or a trip to Africa or you’re going to make it to Mexico and the pink
going to make it to Mexico and the pink
going to make it to Mexico and the pink shirt I’m looking at you again for I’m
shirt I’m looking at you again for I’m
shirt I’m looking at you again for I’m watching you and rooting for you keep in
watching you and rooting for you keep in
watching you and rooting for you keep in mind this here you are this is what you
mind this here you are this is what you
mind this here you are this is what you want I spent a lot of time on lacrosse
want I spent a lot of time on lacrosse
want I spent a lot of time on lacrosse field although they don’t really look
field although they don’t really look
field although they don’t really look like this you tend to think that what
like this you tend to think that what
like this you tend to think that what you want you just march right towards it
you want you just march right towards it
you want you just march right towards it but if in sports you march right towards
but if in sports you march right towards
but if in sports you march right towards the goal what happens the defenders come
the goal what happens the defenders come
the goal what happens the defenders come in and what the defenders are is it’s
in and what the defenders are is it’s
in and what the defenders are is it’s your brain saying ain’t going to happen
your brain saying ain’t going to happen
your brain saying ain’t going to happen so the second you start moving toward
so the second you start moving toward
so the second you start moving toward that thing you want be ready you’re
that thing you want be ready you’re
that thing you want be ready you’re going to tell yourself you don’t feel
going to tell yourself you don’t feel
going to tell yourself you don’t feel like it you’re going to have to force
like it you’re going to have to force
like it you’re going to have to force yourself it’s happening there’s no way
yourself it’s happening there’s no way
yourself it’s happening there’s no way to get around it so what you’re going to
to get around it so what you’re going to
to get around it so what you’re going to have to do is you’re going to basically
have to do is you’re going to basically
have to do is you’re going to basically get bounced around a lot all over the
get bounced around a lot all over the
get bounced around a lot all over the place and they’re going to be a lot of
place and they’re going to be a lot of
place and they’re going to be a lot of times that you feel like this was a
times that you feel like this was a
times that you feel like this was a really dumb idea to start this business
really dumb idea to start this business
really dumb idea to start this business because it’s going to get hard and I
because it’s going to get hard and I
because it’s going to get hard and I want to remind you about something
want to remind you about something
want to remind you about something unlike a sports field where there’s an
unlike a sports field where there’s an
unlike a sports field where there’s an in and out of bounds the great thing
in and out of bounds the great thing
in and out of bounds the great thing about life is there actually aren’t any
about life is there actually aren’t any
about life is there actually aren’t any and it’s usually in those moments where
and it’s usually in those moments where
and it’s usually in those moments where you feel like you can’t do it that
you feel like you can’t do it that
you feel like you can’t do it that you’re closer than ever to having
you’re closer than ever to having
you’re closer than ever to having everything that you wanted and I wanted
everything that you wanted and I wanted
everything that you wanted and I wanted to show you this so that you keep it in
to show you this so that you keep it in
to show you this so that you keep it in mind because I think a lot of times when
mind because I think a lot of times when
mind because I think a lot of times when you look back it’s the darkest moments
you look back it’s the darkest moments
you look back it’s the darkest moments where you realize holy cow that’s what
where you realize holy cow that’s what
where you realize holy cow that’s what projected me forward we live in the most
projected me forward we live in the most
projected me forward we live in the most amazing moment in time so that thing
amazing moment in time so that thing
amazing moment in time so that thing that you have up here whatever it may be
that you have up here whatever it may be
that you have up here whatever it may be you want to use healthy eating to cure
you want to use healthy eating to cure
you want to use healthy eating to cure your diabetes you want to figure out how
your diabetes you want to figure out how
your diabetes you want to figure out how to take care of the elders and start a
to take care of the elders and start a
to take care of the elders and start a new hospice center you want to move to
new hospice center you want to move to
new hospice center you want to move to Africa and build a school guess what you
Africa and build a school guess what you
Africa and build a school guess what you can walk into a bookstore right now and
can walk into a bookstore right now and
can walk into a bookstore right now and buy at least ten books written by
buy at least ten books written by
buy at least ten books written by credentialed experts on how the hell are
credentialed experts on how the hell are
credentialed experts on how the hell are you doing you could google it and you
you doing you could google it and you
you doing you could google it and you can probably find at least I know a
can probably find at least I know a
can probably find at least I know a thousand blogs documenting the step by
thousand blogs documenting the step by
thousand blogs documenting the step by step by step transformation that
step by step transformation that
step by step transformation that somebody else is already
somebody else is already
somebody else is already doing you can find anybody online and
doing you can find anybody online and
doing you can find anybody online and cyber sock them you can just walk in
cyber sock them you can just walk in
cyber sock them you can just walk in their footsteps and let that you know
their footsteps and let that you know
their footsteps and let that you know just use the science of grafting follow
just use the science of grafting follow
just use the science of grafting follow what everyone else is done because
what everyone else is done because
what everyone else is done because somebody else has already doing it so
somebody else has already doing it so
somebody else has already doing it so why don’t you have what you want when
why don’t you have what you want when
why don’t you have what you want when you have all the information that you
you have all the information that you
you have all the information that you need you have the contacts that you need
need you have the contacts that you need
need you have the contacts that you need there are probably free tools online
there are probably free tools online
there are probably free tools online that allow you to start a business or
that allow you to start a business or
that allow you to start a business or join a group or do whatever the heck you
join a group or do whatever the heck you
join a group or do whatever the heck you want it all comes down to one word shut
want it all comes down to one word shut
want it all comes down to one word shut the front door you know what I’m talking
the front door you know what I’m talking
the front door you know what I’m talking about the f-bomb it’s everywhere you
about the f-bomb it’s everywhere you
about the f-bomb it’s everywhere you hear it all the time and I honestly
hear it all the time and I honestly
hear it all the time and I honestly don’t understand what the appeal is of
don’t understand what the appeal is of
don’t understand what the appeal is of the word I mean you don’t sound smart
the word I mean you don’t sound smart
the word I mean you don’t sound smart when you say it and it’s really not
when you say it and it’s really not
when you say it and it’s really not expressing how you really feel it’s sort
expressing how you really feel it’s sort
expressing how you really feel it’s sort of a cheap you know shot to take and of
of a cheap you know shot to take and of
of a cheap you know shot to take and of course you know I’m talking about the
course you know I’m talking about the
course you know I’m talking about the word fine how you doing I’m fine oh
word fine how you doing I’m fine oh
word fine how you doing I’m fine oh really you are dragging around those
really you are dragging around those
really you are dragging around those extra 40 pounds you’re fine feeling like
extra 40 pounds you’re fine feeling like
extra 40 pounds you’re fine feeling like roommates with your spouse and you’re
roommates with your spouse and you’re
roommates with your spouse and you’re fine you haven’t had sex in four months
fine you haven’t had sex in four months
fine you haven’t had sex in four months you’re fine really I don’t think so but
you’re fine really I don’t think so but
you’re fine really I don’t think so but see here’s the deal with saying that
see here’s the deal with saying that
see here’s the deal with saying that you’re fine it’s actually genius because
you’re fine it’s actually genius because
you’re fine it’s actually genius because if you’re fine you don’t have to do
if you’re fine you don’t have to do
if you’re fine you don’t have to do anything about it but when you think
anything about it but when you think
anything about it but when you think about this word fine it just makes me so
about this word fine it just makes me so
about this word fine it just makes me so angry I mean here we are at a conference
angry I mean here we are at a conference
angry I mean here we are at a conference about being alive and you’re going to
about being alive and you’re going to
about being alive and you’re going to describe the experience of being alive
describe the experience of being alive
describe the experience of being alive as fine a flimsy and feeble word your
as fine a flimsy and feeble word your
as fine a flimsy and feeble word your crappy say your crappy if you’re amazing
crappy say your crappy if you’re amazing
crappy say your crappy if you’re amazing say you’re amazing tell the truth and
say you’re amazing tell the truth and
say you’re amazing tell the truth and this not only goes for the social
this not only goes for the social
this not only goes for the social construct oh I want to burden you with
construct oh I want to burden you with
construct oh I want to burden you with the fact that I hate my life for you I
the fact that I hate my life for you I
the fact that I hate my life for you I am amazing but that would make you feel
am amazing but that would make you feel
am amazing but that would make you feel terrible the bigger issue
terrible the bigger issue
terrible the bigger issue the bigger issue with fine is that you
the bigger issue with fine is that you
the bigger issue with fine is that you say it to yourself that thing that you
say it to yourself that thing that you
say it to yourself that thing that you want I guarantee you you’ve convinced
want I guarantee you you’ve convinced
want I guarantee you you’ve convinced yourself that you’re fine not having it
yourself that you’re fine not having it
yourself that you’re fine not having it that’s why you’re not pushing yourself
that’s why you’re not pushing yourself
that’s why you’re not pushing yourself it’s the areas in your life where you’ve
it’s the areas in your life where you’ve
it’s the areas in your life where you’ve given up where you’ve said oh I’m fine
given up where you’ve said oh I’m fine
given up where you’ve said oh I’m fine my mom’s never going to change so I just
my mom’s never going to change so I just
my mom’s never going to change so I just can’t have that conversation I’m fine
can’t have that conversation I’m fine
can’t have that conversation I’m fine you know we got to wait until the kids
you know we got to wait until the kids
you know we got to wait until the kids graduate before we get divorced so we’ll
graduate before we get divorced so we’ll
graduate before we get divorced so we’ll just sleep in separate bedrooms I’m fine
just sleep in separate bedrooms I’m fine
just sleep in separate bedrooms I’m fine I lost my job I can barely pay my bills
I lost my job I can barely pay my bills
I lost my job I can barely pay my bills but whatever it’s hard to get a job and
but whatever it’s hard to get a job and
but whatever it’s hard to get a job and you know one of the reasons why this
you know one of the reasons why this
you know one of the reasons why this word also just annoys me so much is
word also just annoys me so much is
word also just annoys me so much is scientists have calculated oh yeah I’m
scientists have calculated oh yeah I’m
scientists have calculated oh yeah I’m coming down scientists have calculated
coming down scientists have calculated
coming down scientists have calculated the odds of you being born that’s right
the odds of you being born that’s right
the odds of you being born that’s right they’ve crunched the numbers I see you
they’ve crunched the numbers I see you
they’ve crunched the numbers I see you up there
up there
up there they have crunched the numbers on you
they have crunched the numbers on you
they have crunched the numbers on you yeah no you guys standing up you want to
yeah no you guys standing up you want to
yeah no you guys standing up you want to sit down to this they’ve crunched the
sit down to this they’ve crunched the
sit down to this they’ve crunched the numbers on you being bored and they took
numbers on you being bored and they took
numbers on you being bored and they took into account all of the wars and the
into account all of the wars and the
into account all of the wars and the natural disasters and the dinosaurs and
natural disasters and the dinosaurs and
natural disasters and the dinosaurs and everything else and do you realize that
everything else and do you realize that
everything else and do you realize that the odds the odds of you yeah right here
the odds the odds of you yeah right here
the odds the odds of you yeah right here put your computer way stand up for me
put your computer way stand up for me
put your computer way stand up for me done
so the odds of juggler turn around say
so the odds of juggler turn around say hi to everybody the odds
hi to everybody the odds
hi to everybody the odds yeah of Doug Doug’s being born at the
yeah of Doug Doug’s being born at the
yeah of Doug Doug’s being born at the moment in time he was born to the
moment in time he was born to the
moment in time he was born to the parents you were born to with the DNA
parents you were born to with the DNA
parents you were born to with the DNA structure that you have a hundred or no
structure that you have a hundred or no
structure that you have a hundred or no one and four hundred trillion isn’t
one and four hundred trillion isn’t
one and four hundred trillion isn’t amazing so lucky yes
amazing so lucky yes
amazing so lucky yes you’re not fine you’re fantastic you
you’re not fine you’re fantastic you
you’re not fine you’re fantastic you have life-changing ideas for a reason
have life-changing ideas for a reason
have life-changing ideas for a reason and it’s not the torture yourself thank
and it’s not the torture yourself thank
and it’s not the torture yourself thank you thank you done you know Christine
you thank you done you know Christine
you thank you done you know Christine was right when she said all of you could
was right when she said all of you could
was right when she said all of you could be on stage because all of you are all
be on stage because all of you are all
be on stage because all of you are all in this category one and four hundred
in this category one and four hundred
in this category one and four hundred trillion all day long you have ideas
trillion all day long you have ideas
trillion all day long you have ideas that could change your life that could
that could change your life that could
that could change your life that could change the world that could change the
change the world that could change the
change the world that could change the way that you feel and what do you do
way that you feel and what do you do
way that you feel and what do you do with them nothing hopefully it won’t
with them nothing hopefully it won’t
with them nothing hopefully it won’t loan you we didn’t pay for that
thank you guys so much for watching I
thank you guys so much for watching I made this video because Francesca sugar
made this video because Francesca sugar
made this video because Francesca sugar art asked me to so if there’s a famous
art asked me to so if there’s a famous
art asked me to so if there’s a famous entrepreneur that you want me to profile
entrepreneur that you want me to profile
entrepreneur that you want me to profile next leave it down the comments below
next leave it down the comments below
next leave it down the comments below and I’ll see what I can do
and I’ll see what I can do
and I’ll see what I can do I’d also love to know what is Mel say
I’d also love to know what is Mel say
I’d also love to know what is Mel say that has the biggest impact on you what
that has the biggest impact on you what
that has the biggest impact on you what was your favorite clip and what are you
was your favorite clip and what are you
was your favorite clip and what are you going to take from this video and
going to take from this video and
going to take from this video and immediately apply somehow to your life
immediately apply somehow to your life
immediately apply somehow to your life or to your business leave it down the
or to your business leave it down the
or to your business leave it down the comments below and I’m going to join in
comments below and I’m going to join in
comments below and I’m going to join in the discussion finally I want to give a
the discussion finally I want to give a
the discussion finally I want to give a quick shout out to the guys from V and
quick shout out to the guys from V and
quick shout out to the guys from V and our media thank you so much for picking
our media thank you so much for picking
our media thank you so much for picking up a copy of my book your one word and
up a copy of my book your one word and
up a copy of my book your one word and for the fun interview that we did on
for the fun interview that we did on
for the fun interview that we did on your channel it was a blast and I’m
your channel it was a blast and I’m
your channel it was a blast and I’m excited to see where your channel goes
excited to see where your channel goes
excited to see where your channel goes guys our guest today is Evan Carmichael
guys our guest today is Evan Carmichael
guys our guest today is Evan Carmichael and Evan he was recognized by Forbes as
and Evan he was recognized by Forbes as
and Evan he was recognized by Forbes as one of the world’s top 40 social
one of the world’s top 40 social
one of the world’s top 40 social marketing talents inc magazine rated him
marketing talents inc magazine rated him
marketing talents inc magazine rated him as one of the top 25 social media
as one of the top 25 social media
as one of the top 25 social media keynote speakers you need to know and he
keynote speakers you need to know and he
keynote speakers you need to know and he had recently published a book called
had recently published a book called
had recently published a book called your one-word so thank you guys so much
your one-word so thank you guys so much
your one-word so thank you guys so much for watching I believe in you I hope you
for watching I believe in you I hope you
for watching I believe in you I hope you continue to believe in yourself and
continue to believe in yourself and
continue to believe in yourself and whatever your one word is much love I’ll
whatever your one word is much love I’ll
whatever your one word is much love I’ll see you soon
I have a pad of post-it oh yes posted
I have a pad of post-it oh yes posted notes next to my sink in at my bathroom
notes next to my sink in at my bathroom
notes next to my sink in at my bathroom why well because after I brush my teeth
why well because after I brush my teeth
why well because after I brush my teeth haven’t looked at my phone yet
haven’t looked at my phone yet
haven’t looked at my phone yet I take a post-it note out and I write
I take a post-it note out and I write
I take a post-it note out and I write the three things I need to focus on
the three things I need to focus on
the three things I need to focus on today and then you know what I do with
today and then you know what I do with
today and then you know what I do with it
it
it extra get on the bathroom my phone now
extra get on the bathroom my phone now
extra get on the bathroom my phone now why would I do that
why would I do that
why would I do that because I have my phone with me all the
because I have my phone with me all the
because I have my phone with me all the time and so if it’s on the back of my
time and so if it’s on the back of my
time and so if it’s on the back of my phone I’m going to get a visual cue to
phone I’m going to get a visual cue to
phone I’m going to get a visual cue to remind me to keep the top of mind so I
remind me to keep the top of mind so I
remind me to keep the top of mind so I stay focused on it how is it that you
stay focused on it how is it that you
stay focused on it how is it that you see something larger for yourself well
see something larger for yourself well
see something larger for yourself well the first thing that you have to do the
the first thing that you have to do the
the first thing that you have to do the very first thing is you have to get out
very first thing is you have to get out
very first thing is you have to get out of the week successful people are all in
of the week successful people are all in
of the week successful people are all in the weeds the busier you are the more
the weeds the busier you are the more
the weeds the busier you are the more you have going on you know that old
you have going on you know that old
you have going on you know that old saying that everybody says don’t work in
saying that everybody says don’t work in
saying that everybody says don’t work in your business work on your business we
your business work on your business we
your business work on your business we are all in the weeds and the key to
are all in the weeds and the key to
are all in the weeds and the key to seeing something larger for yourself is
seeing something larger for yourself is
seeing something larger for yourself is getting out of the weeds I mean don’t
getting out of the weeds I mean don’t
getting out of the weeds I mean don’t you feel like this dude I know I do you
you feel like this dude I know I do you
you feel like this dude I know I do you know I wake up brush your teeth make the
know I wake up brush your teeth make the
know I wake up brush your teeth make the coffee feed the kids pack the lunches
coffee feed the kids pack the lunches
coffee feed the kids pack the lunches put them on the bus get in the car text
put them on the bus get in the car text
put them on the bus get in the car text your friends get some coffee arrive at
your friends get some coffee arrive at
your friends get some coffee arrive at work feign interest answer emails update
work feign interest answer emails update
work feign interest answer emails update Facebook make cold calls avoid the
Facebook make cold calls avoid the
Facebook make cold calls avoid the meeting look busy crunch some numbers up
meeting look busy crunch some numbers up
meeting look busy crunch some numbers up see Facebook get in the car go to
see Facebook get in the car go to
see Facebook get in the car go to carpool feed your kids feed the dogs
carpool feed your kids feed the dogs
carpool feed your kids feed the dogs check email update Facebook kiss your
check email update Facebook kiss your
check email update Facebook kiss your husband climb into bed fool around
husband climb into bed fool around
husband climb into bed fool around are you kidding I’m exhausted
are you kidding I’m exhausted
are you kidding I’m exhausted turn off the light I I live in a two
turn off the light I I live in a two
turn off the light I I live in a two household Thank You entrepreneurial
household Thank You entrepreneurial
household Thank You entrepreneurial family I’m exhausted
family I’m exhausted
family I’m exhausted I’m busy how the heck am I going to see
I’m busy how the heck am I going to see
I’m busy how the heck am I going to see something larger for my life when I have
something larger for my life when I have
something larger for my life when I have a business to run when I have kids to
a business to run when I have kids to
a business to run when I have kids to take care of well you have to get out of
take care of well you have to get out of
take care of well you have to get out of the weeds and you know the truth is
the weeds and you know the truth is
the weeds and you know the truth is there’s some good news and the good news
there’s some good news and the good news
there’s some good news and the good news is I heard about this pill that’s in
is I heard about this pill that’s in
is I heard about this pill that’s in development
you know I know I’m waiting for it too
you know I know I’m waiting for it too and you know the problem though is I
and you know the problem though is I
and you know the problem though is I think that they’re going to have naming
think that they’re going to have naming
think that they’re going to have naming problems forget it all and it seems like
problems forget it all and it seems like
problems forget it all and it seems like a kind of a bad name for a pill even
a kind of a bad name for a pill even
a kind of a bad name for a pill even though I might take it now and again so
though I might take it now and again so
though I might take it now and again so I thought Before we jump into how you
I thought Before we jump into how you
I thought Before we jump into how you see something larger I need to yank you
see something larger I need to yank you
see something larger I need to yank you out of the wheels first so I’m going to
out of the wheels first so I’m going to
out of the wheels first so I’m going to give you my advice for what I do in
give you my advice for what I do in
give you my advice for what I do in order to keep myself out of the weeds
order to keep myself out of the weeds
order to keep myself out of the weeds you guys don’t need remedial personal
you guys don’t need remedial personal
you guys don’t need remedial personal development I got that I just feel
development I got that I just feel
development I got that I just feel obligated to give you some some
obligated to give you some some
obligated to give you some some actionable things to do because if you
actionable things to do because if you
actionable things to do because if you don’t plan your week out before the week
don’t plan your week out before the week
don’t plan your week out before the week starts you’re going to be in reactive
starts you’re going to be in reactive
starts you’re going to be in reactive mode you’re going to be running around
mode you’re going to be running around
mode you’re going to be running around you’re going to be you’re going to be
you’re going to be you’re going to be
you’re going to be you’re going to be chasing down the biggest thing that’s
chasing down the biggest thing that’s
chasing down the biggest thing that’s happening in your life you’re going to
happening in your life you’re going to
happening in your life you’re going to be constantly responding this is one of
be constantly responding this is one of
be constantly responding this is one of the most important things that you can
the most important things that you can
the most important things that you can do if you’re not married if you’re not
do if you’re not married if you’re not
do if you’re not married if you’re not living with somebody do it for yourself
living with somebody do it for yourself
living with somebody do it for yourself plan your week you know this already the
plan your week you know this already the
plan your week you know this already the first thing that you need to do is you
first thing that you need to do is you
first thing that you need to do is you start you define what success looks like
start you define what success looks like
start you define what success looks like for you and it’s not ten million dollars
for you and it’s not ten million dollars
for you and it’s not ten million dollars in the bank I’m sorry it needs to be
in the bank I’m sorry it needs to be
in the bank I’m sorry it needs to be something bigger a bigger reason is too
something bigger a bigger reason is too
something bigger a bigger reason is too many dolls in the back to me well yeah I
many dolls in the back to me well yeah I
many dolls in the back to me well yeah I mean the problem is saying it’s ten
mean the problem is saying it’s ten
mean the problem is saying it’s ten million dollars in the bank is that when
million dollars in the bank is that when
million dollars in the bank is that when you finally get to the ten million
you finally get to the ten million
you finally get to the ten million dollars typically those people feel
dollars typically those people feel
dollars typically those people feel pretty bankrupt that’s what you’re
pretty bankrupt that’s what you’re
pretty bankrupt that’s what you’re saying and that’s what you’re seeing you
saying and that’s what you’re seeing you
saying and that’s what you’re seeing you absolutely absolutely and so you know
absolutely absolutely and so you know
absolutely absolutely and so you know once you define it for yourself I think
once you define it for yourself I think
once you define it for yourself I think the key is how do you then trick
the key is how do you then trick
the key is how do you then trick yourself Donny into feeling successful
yourself Donny into feeling successful
yourself Donny into feeling successful every single day you know I’ve got a
every single day you know I’ve got a
every single day you know I’ve got a daughter the plays Rick Ross she’s nine
daughter the plays Rick Ross she’s nine
daughter the plays Rick Ross she’s nine years old if I said to her I’m only
years old if I said to her I’m only
years old if I said to her I’m only cheering for you when you score a goal
cheering for you when you score a goal
cheering for you when you score a goal how do you think she’d feel during the
how do you think she’d feel during the
how do you think she’d feel during the game she wouldn’t play very well that’s
game she wouldn’t play very well that’s
game she wouldn’t play very well that’s for sure so you’ve got to figure out how
for sure so you’ve got to figure out how
for sure so you’ve got to figure out how do you cheer for yourself and how do you
do you cheer for yourself and how do you
do you cheer for yourself and how do you feel successful while you’re playing the
feel successful while you’re playing the
feel successful while you’re playing the game because it’s not all about the goal
game because it’s not all about the goal
game because it’s not all about the goal okay and are there any tools to cheer
okay and are there any tools to cheer
okay and are there any tools to cheer for myself give me today I want to feel
for myself give me today I want to feel
for myself give me today I want to feel better inside I’m at home I’m watching
better inside I’m at home I’m watching
better inside I’m at home I’m watching I’m either somebody that’s got the
I’m either somebody that’s got the
I’m either somebody that’s got the millions of dollars and it’s not feeling
millions of dollars and it’s not feeling
millions of dollars and it’s not feeling good or I don’t have those millions of
good or I don’t have those millions of
good or I don’t have those millions of dollars I’m not feeling good I worry
dollars I’m not feeling good I worry
dollars I’m not feeling good I worry about the economy around yeah so glad
about the economy around yeah so glad
about the economy around yeah so glad you asked that I need to know what you
you asked that I need to know what you
you asked that I need to know what you need to do is you have to decide ok this
need to do is you have to decide ok this
need to do is you have to decide ok this is where I’m going I’m going for the big
is where I’m going I’m going for the big
is where I’m going I’m going for the big vision of what success is
vision of what success is
vision of what success is now do a head-fake with yourself and say
now do a head-fake with yourself and say
now do a head-fake with yourself and say ok let’s just say that I’m actually
ok let’s just say that I’m actually
ok let’s just say that I’m actually already there I have the 10 million
already there I have the 10 million
already there I have the 10 million dollars in the bank I’m you know saving
dollars in the bank I’m you know saving
dollars in the bank I’m you know saving the world what
the world what
the world what it is that your version of successes
it is that your version of successes
it is that your version of successes what are three things that I would
what are three things that I would
what are three things that I would change about this day-to-day how would I
change about this day-to-day how would I
change about this day-to-day how would I live it to day if I already had all that
live it to day if I already had all that
live it to day if I already had all that stuff what time would I wake up who’s my
stuff what time would I wake up who’s my
stuff what time would I wake up who’s my first phone call to what did I eat for
first phone call to what did I eat for
first phone call to what did I eat for breakfast
breakfast
breakfast start living as that success vision now
”
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