
[Music] hi so we’re going to start things off
hi so we’re going to start things off
hi so we’re going to start things off this evening with a little bit of
this evening with a little bit of
this evening with a little bit of audience participation do me a favor
audience participation do me a favor
audience participation do me a favor raise your hand if you have ever had a
raise your hand if you have ever had a
raise your hand if you have ever had a feeling or an emotional response to
feeling or an emotional response to
feeling or an emotional response to something good we’re not all robots all
something good we’re not all robots all
something good we’re not all robots all right so but really think about this for
right so but really think about this for
right so but really think about this for a second we are a diverse group of
a second we are a diverse group of
a second we are a diverse group of people we’ve come from different places
people we’ve come from different places
people we’ve come from different places of the world some of us speak different
of the world some of us speak different
of the world some of us speak different languages we certainly all have
languages we certainly all have
languages we certainly all have different thoughts and opinions on
different thoughts and opinions on
different thoughts and opinions on things yet we were all just able to
things yet we were all just able to
things yet we were all just able to unanimously agree on a shared experience
unanimously agree on a shared experience
unanimously agree on a shared experience that shared experience being that we
that shared experience being that we
that shared experience being that we have feelings and emotions now I want to
have feelings and emotions now I want to
have feelings and emotions now I want to ask you this how often do you find
ask you this how often do you find
ask you this how often do you find yourself in the company of others having
yourself in the company of others having
yourself in the company of others having a conversation about your feelings and
a conversation about your feelings and
a conversation about your feelings and emotions depending on what your job is
emotions depending on what your job is
emotions depending on what your job is you know it might be often but most of
you know it might be often but most of
you know it might be often but most of us would say not very often at all I
us would say not very often at all I
us would say not very often at all I find that to be I’m troublesome we all
find that to be I’m troublesome we all
find that to be I’m troublesome we all just SAT here and agreed that it’s that
just SAT here and agreed that it’s that
just SAT here and agreed that it’s that we’re all having it um the problem with
we’re all having it um the problem with
we’re all having it um the problem with that is that if we don’t talk about it
that is that if we don’t talk about it
that is that if we don’t talk about it it’s not like they go away right if we
it’s not like they go away right if we
it’s not like they go away right if we close our eyes and pretend like it’s not
close our eyes and pretend like it’s not
close our eyes and pretend like it’s not happening it’s still happening we’re
happening it’s still happening we’re
happening it’s still happening we’re just not talking about it so um that is
just not talking about it so um that is
just not talking about it so um that is in and of itself as a problem the next
in and of itself as a problem the next
in and of itself as a problem the next thing we’re going to start things off
thing we’re going to start things off
thing we’re going to start things off with doing another thing we’re I want
with doing another thing we’re I want
with doing another thing we’re I want you to look at somebody one of your
you to look at somebody one of your
you to look at somebody one of your partners find somebody in the audience
partners find somebody in the audience
partners find somebody in the audience or make eye contact probably someone
or make eye contact probably someone
or make eye contact probably someone sitting next to you for the introverts
sitting next to you for the introverts
sitting next to you for the introverts I’m sorry I want you to look at them
I’m sorry I want you to look at them
I’m sorry I want you to look at them we’re going to ask a deep and personal
we’re going to ask a deep and personal
we’re going to ask a deep and personal question so are you ready the question
question so are you ready the question
question so are you ready the question I’d like you to ask the person you’re
I’d like you to ask the person you’re
I’d like you to ask the person you’re looking at and by the way I seriously
looking at and by the way I seriously
looking at and by the way I seriously want you to do this is how are you
want you to do this is how are you
want you to do this is how are you feeling today
okay so some of us are going oh man that
okay so some of us are going oh man that was not as bad as I thought it was going
was not as bad as I thought it was going
was not as bad as I thought it was going to be others are four other others of us
to be others are four other others of us
to be others are four other others of us are going that was exactly as awful as I
are going that was exactly as awful as I
are going that was exactly as awful as I thought it would be and there’s a
thought it would be and there’s a
thought it would be and there’s a variety of responses there in between so
variety of responses there in between so
variety of responses there in between so your next thought is probably well that
your next thought is probably well that
your next thought is probably well that wasn’t a deep and personal question at
wasn’t a deep and personal question at
wasn’t a deep and personal question at all right well I’m here to offer you the
all right well I’m here to offer you the
all right well I’m here to offer you the the answer that it is actually we don’t
the answer that it is actually we don’t
the answer that it is actually we don’t treat that question with the amount of
treat that question with the amount of
treat that question with the amount of weight and importance that we should
weight and importance that we should
weight and importance that we should write I’d like to tell you a quick story
write I’d like to tell you a quick story
write I’d like to tell you a quick story so my wife and I have a friend he came
so my wife and I have a friend he came
so my wife and I have a friend he came to the United States to do his undergrad
to the United States to do his undergrad
to the United States to do his undergrad and eventually got his master’s degree
and eventually got his master’s degree
and eventually got his master’s degree here and when he got here he was excited
here and when he got here he was excited
here and when he got here he was excited he was making friends friendly guy and
he was making friends friendly guy and
he was making friends friendly guy and he reached the point on campus where he
he reached the point on campus where he
he reached the point on campus where he recognized people they recognized him
recognized people they recognized him
recognized people they recognized him you know they’re doing the thing they’re
you know they’re doing the thing they’re
you know they’re doing the thing they’re walking he makes eye contact smile okay
walking he makes eye contact smile okay
walking he makes eye contact smile okay we’re off to a good start the guy goes
we’re off to a good start the guy goes
we’re off to a good start the guy goes hey how are you and he gets excited and
hey how are you and he gets excited and
hey how are you and he gets excited and so he stops you almost like gets in his
so he stops you almost like gets in his
so he stops you almost like gets in his way right and he starts talking to him
way right and he starts talking to him
way right and he starts talking to him and he’s animated he’s talking and he’s
and he’s animated he’s talking and he’s
and he’s animated he’s talking and he’s telling him all about his day for like
telling him all about his day for like
telling him all about his day for like 10-15 minutes right and then he starts
10-15 minutes right and then he starts
10-15 minutes right and then he starts to like slowly pick up on the social
to like slowly pick up on the social
to like slowly pick up on the social cues of like yeah this guy does not
cues of like yeah this guy does not
cues of like yeah this guy does not really care what I what my day is like
really care what I what my day is like
really care what I what my day is like so then goes on his day happens again
so then goes on his day happens again
so then goes on his day happens again and he starts to notice this pattern
and he starts to notice this pattern
and he starts to notice this pattern right and then it dawns on him that no
right and then it dawns on him that no
right and then it dawns on him that no one really cares about the answer that
one really cares about the answer that
one really cares about the answer that that’s given and slowly but surely we
that’s given and slowly but surely we
that’s given and slowly but surely we broke him of that habit think about that
broke him of that habit think about that
broke him of that habit think about that for a second we broke him of the habit
for a second we broke him of the habit
for a second we broke him of the habit of stopping and waiting to listen to the
of stopping and waiting to listen to the
of stopping and waiting to listen to the quiet earlier to answer the question how
quiet earlier to answer the question how
quiet earlier to answer the question how are you feeling today I think that’s
are you feeling today I think that’s
are you feeling today I think that’s incredibly sad to be honest with you
incredibly sad to be honest with you
incredibly sad to be honest with you right see where he came from you asked
right see where he came from you asked
right see where he came from you asked the question and you stopped you cared
the question and you stopped you cared
the question and you stopped you cared you wanted to know and you wanted to
you wanted to know and you wanted to
you wanted to know and you wanted to share so all of these sorts of things
share so all of these sorts of things
share so all of these sorts of things combined have led me to start to think
combined have led me to start to think
combined have led me to start to think about some ways that we can start
about some ways that we can start
about some ways that we can start having conversations about emotions how
having conversations about emotions how
having conversations about emotions how we can start starting a dialogue about
we can start starting a dialogue about
we can start starting a dialogue about the things we don’t talk about and
the things we don’t talk about and
the things we don’t talk about and taking the time to do it so that led me
taking the time to do it so that led me
taking the time to do it so that led me to a project that I call step into my
to a project that I call step into my
to a project that I call step into my world step into my world is a
world step into my world is a
world step into my world is a three-dimensional art project that uses
three-dimensional art project that uses
three-dimensional art project that uses virtual reality technology to allow
virtual reality technology to allow
virtual reality technology to allow people to express their emotions in a 3d
people to express their emotions in a 3d
people to express their emotions in a 3d space right we can’t they come in and
space right we can’t they come in and
space right we can’t they come in and it’s super simple we just we just did it
it’s super simple we just we just did it
it’s super simple we just we just did it really I say how are you today and they
really I say how are you today and they
really I say how are you today and they say blank and I go great show me let me
say blank and I go great show me let me
say blank and I go great show me let me see what that feels like let me
see what that feels like let me
see what that feels like let me understand what that feels like so then
understand what that feels like so then
understand what that feels like so then they get to to stand in this this
they get to to stand in this this
they get to to stand in this this limitless space and create right and
limitless space and create right and
limitless space and create right and express their emotions in this artistic
express their emotions in this artistic
express their emotions in this artistic way it’s so amazing to see somebody do
way it’s so amazing to see somebody do
way it’s so amazing to see somebody do it the look on their faces just sheer
it the look on their faces just sheer
it the look on their faces just sheer joy or terror but usually it’s joy right
joy or terror but usually it’s joy right
joy or terror but usually it’s joy right when they get to experience that but
when they get to experience that but
when they get to experience that but that’s actually not the really cool part
that’s actually not the really cool part
that’s actually not the really cool part what I get most excited about is what we
what I get most excited about is what we
what I get most excited about is what we do after the arts go mate see after the
do after the arts go mate see after the
do after the arts go mate see after the arts we made I bring in other people
arts we made I bring in other people
arts we made I bring in other people right and we we put them in it and we
right and we we put them in it and we
right and we we put them in it and we offer them the opportunity to actually
offer them the opportunity to actually
offer them the opportunity to actually step into the world of the person that
step into the world of the person that
step into the world of the person that created it they get the same field of
created it they get the same field of
created it they get the same field of view they’re using the exact same
view they’re using the exact same
view they’re using the exact same technology right in essence it’s a
technology right in essence it’s a
technology right in essence it’s a window into their world into their brain
window into their world into their brain
window into their world into their brain so I didn’t do slides because I’m gonna
so I didn’t do slides because I’m gonna
so I didn’t do slides because I’m gonna actually show you what this looks like
actually show you what this looks like
actually show you what this looks like as a word of caution I seriously cannot
as a word of caution I seriously cannot
as a word of caution I seriously cannot see so I’m going to expect some empathy
see so I’m going to expect some empathy
see so I’m going to expect some empathy and if I’m about to fall off the stage
and if I’m about to fall off the stage
and if I’m about to fall off the stage someone yell
just a second all right so on if we look
just a second all right so on if we look over here this is exactly what I see see
over here this is exactly what I see see
over here this is exactly what I see see the question I asked was how are you
the question I asked was how are you
the question I asked was how are you feeling the response I got was good so
feeling the response I got was good so
feeling the response I got was good so take a moment to understand what well
take a moment to understand what well
take a moment to understand what well good is see what I see is that good is
good is see what I see is that good is
good is see what I see is that good is one two three four faces all that look
one two three four faces all that look
one two three four faces all that look different it’s a moon I’m pointing
different it’s a moon I’m pointing
different it’s a moon I’m pointing because that’s my reality it’s a son
because that’s my reality it’s a son
because that’s my reality it’s a son right it’s also a tornado back here
right it’s also a tornado back here
right it’s also a tornado back here right all of a sudden good has so much
right all of a sudden good has so much
right all of a sudden good has so much more depth than understanding oh it’s
more depth than understanding oh it’s
more depth than understanding oh it’s also I don’t know right suddenly the
also I don’t know right suddenly the
also I don’t know right suddenly the dialogue of how are you feeling becomes
dialogue of how are you feeling becomes
dialogue of how are you feeling becomes so much richer here I’m going to take
so much richer here I’m going to take
so much richer here I’m going to take this off and that dialogue piece is
this off and that dialogue piece is
this off and that dialogue piece is actually what it’s all about because
actually what it’s all about because
actually what it’s all about because after the Arts done and after someone
after the Arts done and after someone
after the Arts done and after someone has viewed it we get to have a
has viewed it we get to have a
has viewed it we get to have a conversation see in that conversation
conversation see in that conversation
conversation see in that conversation they talk about what it felt like to be
they talk about what it felt like to be
they talk about what it felt like to be in someone else’s shoes right to have a
in someone else’s shoes right to have a
in someone else’s shoes right to have a better understanding of what that
better understanding of what that
better understanding of what that emotion was it’s truly the opportunity
emotion was it’s truly the opportunity
emotion was it’s truly the opportunity to stand in someone else’s shoes I don’t
to stand in someone else’s shoes I don’t
to stand in someone else’s shoes I don’t know if you heard that as a kid I was a
know if you heard that as a kid I was a
know if you heard that as a kid I was a small I was the smallest of three so I
small I was the smallest of three so I
small I was the smallest of three so I heard that a lot how would your brother
heard that a lot how would your brother
heard that a lot how would your brother feel so um it’s an incredible experience
feel so um it’s an incredible experience
feel so um it’s an incredible experience but what ends up happening is that
but what ends up happening is that
but what ends up happening is that people want to talk see suddenly the the
people want to talk see suddenly the the
people want to talk see suddenly the the topic that people wouldn’t talk about
topic that people wouldn’t talk about
topic that people wouldn’t talk about they’re engaged they want to talk about
they’re engaged they want to talk about
they’re engaged they want to talk about it it’s unique all right so they have a
it it’s unique all right so they have a
it it’s unique all right so they have a conversation with me but then they want
conversation with me but then they want
conversation with me but then they want to go talk to their friends about it all
to go talk to their friends about it all
to go talk to their friends about it all right first it starts about the
right first it starts about the
right first it starts about the experience he was so cool
experience he was so cool
experience he was so cool look around I can move in this 3d space
look around I can move in this 3d space
look around I can move in this 3d space and then slowly but surely the
and then slowly but surely the
and then slowly but surely the conversation drifts towards like I
conversation drifts towards like I
conversation drifts towards like I totally understand why they drew a moon
totally understand why they drew a moon
totally understand why they drew a moon or like I don’t understand that I would
or like I don’t understand that I would
or like I don’t understand that I would have drawn that and now all of a sudden
have drawn that and now all of a sudden
have drawn that and now all of a sudden were having a conversation about a topic
were having a conversation about a topic
were having a conversation about a topic that we treat as if it’s taboo but we
that we treat as if it’s taboo but we
that we treat as if it’s taboo but we all just agreed that it’s something that
all just agreed that it’s something that
all just agreed that it’s something that we’re all experiencing so I guess what
we’re all experiencing so I guess what
we’re all experiencing so I guess what I’m encouraging you to do what I
I’m encouraging you to do what I
I’m encouraging you to do what I challenge you to do is after you leave
challenge you to do is after you leave
challenge you to do is after you leave here figure out a way to navigate the
here figure out a way to navigate the
here figure out a way to navigate the world so that you stop so that you wait
world so that you stop so that you wait
world so that you stop so that you wait you listen you care about the question
you listen you care about the question
you listen you care about the question you care about the response and that the
you care about the response and that the
you care about the response and that the response now has greater depth and
response now has greater depth and
response now has greater depth and meaning than it ever had before see
meaning than it ever had before see
meaning than it ever had before see because stepping into someone else’s
because stepping into someone else’s
because stepping into someone else’s shoes isn’t just a phrase it’s a
shoes isn’t just a phrase it’s a
shoes isn’t just a phrase it’s a possibility now it’s also a way of life
possibility now it’s also a way of life
possibility now it’s also a way of life it’s the way we do things I also
it’s the way we do things I also
it’s the way we do things I also encourage you to go out and to have a
encourage you to go out and to have a
encourage you to go out and to have a conversation start a conversation that
conversation start a conversation that
conversation start a conversation that you’re not comfortable with I promise
you’re not comfortable with I promise
you’re not comfortable with I promise you I promise you whatever happens after
you I promise you whatever happens after
you I promise you whatever happens after you start the conversation will be worth
you start the conversation will be worth
you start the conversation will be worth it thank you
it thank you
it thank you [Applause]
”
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