once I started to generously serve my product got better as an entrepreneur
product got better as an entrepreneur
product got better as an entrepreneur how many of you have a people plan C
how many of you have a people plan C
how many of you have a people plan C that’s the greatest opportunity and why
that’s the greatest opportunity and why
that’s the greatest opportunity and why my company exists because the last time
my company exists because the last time
my company exists because the last time I met you I don’t think I was my
I met you I don’t think I was my
I met you I don’t think I was my authentic self I don’t think I was Keith
authentic self I don’t think I was Keith
authentic self I don’t think I was Keith Ferrazzi to me mentorship is a very
Ferrazzi to me mentorship is a very
Ferrazzi to me mentorship is a very misunderstood idea leadership is about
misunderstood idea leadership is about
misunderstood idea leadership is about earning permission to influence and the
earning permission to influence and the
earning permission to influence and the role doesn’t give you permission to
role doesn’t give you permission to
role doesn’t give you permission to influence how many times have you backed
influence how many times have you backed
influence how many times have you backed down from what you knew you needed to do
down from what you knew you needed to do
down from what you knew you needed to do because you’re afraid to ask most
because you’re afraid to ask most
because you’re afraid to ask most intimate critical relationships lie to
intimate critical relationships lie to
intimate critical relationships lie to each other and they shouldn’t small
each other and they shouldn’t small
each other and they shouldn’t small doses of incremental positive
doses of incremental positive
doses of incremental positive experiences change mindsets so you
experiences change mindsets so you
experiences change mindsets so you change the behavior to change the
change the behavior to change the
change the behavior to change the mindset the key is we recognize that
mindset the key is we recognize that
mindset the key is we recognize that inside of all of us I think is greatness
inside of all of us I think is greatness
inside of all of us I think is greatness I think extraordinary things and we need
I think extraordinary things and we need
I think extraordinary things and we need other people to pull them out if you
other people to pull them out if you
other people to pull them out if you take nothing away from the time that
take nothing away from the time that
take nothing away from the time that we’re gonna spend together going forward
we’re gonna spend together going forward
we’re gonna spend together going forward if you do nothing else but just remember
if you do nothing else but just remember
if you do nothing else but just remember this he’s an American author and founder
this he’s an American author and founder
this he’s an American author and founder and CEO of Ferrazzi greenlight his first
and CEO of Ferrazzi greenlight his first
and CEO of Ferrazzi greenlight his first book never eat alone was published in
book never eat alone was published in
book never eat alone was published in 2005 and became a best-seller he’s been
2005 and became a best-seller he’s been
2005 and became a best-seller he’s been described as a master networker
described as a master networker
described as a master networker he’s Keith Ferrazzi and here’s my take
he’s Keith Ferrazzi and here’s my take
he’s Keith Ferrazzi and here’s my take on his top ten rules for success you
know in retrospect in my life I spent
know in retrospect in my life I spent way too much time early on as an
way too much time early on as an
way too much time early on as an entrepreneur pushing selling as opposed
entrepreneur pushing selling as opposed
entrepreneur pushing selling as opposed to generously serving and once I started
to generously serving and once I started
to generously serving and once I started to generously serve my product got
to generously serve my product got
to generously serve my product got better as an entrepreneur so even in
better as an entrepreneur so even in
better as an entrepreneur so even in that area of professional currency
that area of professional currency
that area of professional currency people who believe that their job is to
people who believe that their job is to
people who believe that their job is to sell stuff versus serve a community
sell stuff versus serve a community
sell stuff versus serve a community actually don’t do as well now how many
actually don’t do as well now how many
actually don’t do as well now how many of you in this room have a have a to-do
of you in this room have a have a to-do
of you in this room have a have a to-do list
list
list raise your hands of course you do
raise your hands of course you do
raise your hands of course you do because productivity is important isn’t
because productivity is important isn’t
because productivity is important isn’t it how many of you have a people plan
it how many of you have a people plan
it how many of you have a people plan see that’s the greatest opportunity and
see that’s the greatest opportunity and
see that’s the greatest opportunity and why my company exists because if
why my company exists because if
why my company exists because if relationships are so crucially important
relationships are so crucially important
relationships are so crucially important to your success in so many ways why is
to your success in so many ways why is
to your success in so many ways why is it that you have not asked yourself a
it that you have not asked yourself a
it that you have not asked yourself a simple question every year who are the
simple question every year who are the
simple question every year who are the 25 most important people to my success
25 most important people to my success
25 most important people to my success and how do I deepen those relationships
and how do I deepen those relationships
and how do I deepen those relationships authentically and genuinely
authentically and genuinely
authentically and genuinely extraordinary book who’s got your back
extraordinary book who’s got your back
extraordinary book who’s got your back you write about the courage to be
you write about the courage to be
you write about the courage to be vulnerable I guess that should give me
vulnerable I guess that should give me
vulnerable I guess that should give me an an give me an example I’ll give you
an an give me an example I’ll give you
an an give me an example I’ll give you one right now and I’ll do it I’m sitting
one right now and I’ll do it I’m sitting
one right now and I’ll do it I’m sitting here sweating a little bit because you
here sweating a little bit because you
here sweating a little bit because you don’t see it I feel it because the last
don’t see it I feel it because the last
don’t see it I feel it because the last time I met you I don’t think I was my
time I met you I don’t think I was my
time I met you I don’t think I was my authentic self I don’t think I was Keith
authentic self I don’t think I was Keith
authentic self I don’t think I was Keith Ferrazzi I think I was some guy trying
Ferrazzi I think I was some guy trying
Ferrazzi I think I was some guy trying to impress I met you to dinner you may
to impress I met you to dinner you may
to impress I met you to dinner you may not even remember it long ago in Chicago
not even remember it long ago in Chicago
not even remember it long ago in Chicago we were being interviewed on stage and I
we were being interviewed on stage and I
we were being interviewed on stage and I was so excited to meet you you know
was so excited to meet you you know
was so excited to meet you you know obviously the platform that you have the
obviously the platform that you have the
obviously the platform that you have the the potential that if we actually
the potential that if we actually
the potential that if we actually clicked and you know I believe in this
clicked and you know I believe in this
clicked and you know I believe in this stuff and and I want to create a
stuff and and I want to create a
stuff and and I want to create a movement of people connecting with other
movement of people connecting with other
movement of people connecting with other people more authentically and seriously
people more authentically and seriously
people more authentically and seriously and when I get nervous I get bigger and
and when I get nervous I get bigger and
and when I get nervous I get bigger and sometimes I brag and I and I and I
sometimes I brag and I and I and I
sometimes I brag and I and I and I perform and other people get quiet and
perform and other people get quiet and
perform and other people get quiet and turn in but I go out and I did that at
turn in but I go out and I did that at
turn in but I go out and I did that at dinner and I just felt myself going
dinner and I just felt myself going
dinner and I just felt myself going further and further away from you which
further and further away from you which
further and further away from you which I somebody I admired and want to get
I somebody I admired and want to get
I somebody I admired and want to get closer to to me mentorship is a very
closer to to me mentorship is a very
closer to to me mentorship is a very misunderstood idea most people think of
misunderstood idea most people think of
misunderstood idea most people think of mentors is you know let’s find a guy
mentors is you know let’s find a guy
mentors is you know let’s find a guy like Luis here who we look up to and
like Luis here who we look up to and
like Luis here who we look up to and would like to aspire to be and please
would like to aspire to be and please
would like to aspire to be and please you know allow me to to learn everything
you know allow me to to learn everything
you know allow me to to learn everything at your feet right that’s kind of bull
at your feet right that’s kind of bull
at your feet right that’s kind of bull um well I don’t know if it works or not
um well I don’t know if it works or not
um well I don’t know if it works or not but the bottom line is you are mentor
but the bottom line is you are mentor
but the bottom line is you are mentor that the lunch that we had together you
that the lunch that we had together you
that the lunch that we had together you coming up to my house what I learned
coming up to my house what I learned
coming up to my house what I learned from your podcasts from your work
from your podcasts from your work
from your podcasts from your work teaches me something and if I can’t find
teaches me something and if I can’t find
teaches me something and if I can’t find I need to find a group of people in my
I need to find a group of people in my
I need to find a group of people in my life constantly that I’m learning from
life constantly that I’m learning from
life constantly that I’m learning from they are my mentors yeah I don’t I don’t
they are my mentors yeah I don’t I don’t
they are my mentors yeah I don’t I don’t try to rest too much weight in any one
try to rest too much weight in any one
try to rest too much weight in any one individual our job is to create a set a
individual our job is to create a set a
individual our job is to create a set a roadmap of individuals in our lives
roadmap of individuals in our lives
roadmap of individuals in our lives through whom we learn mmm right and and
through whom we learn mmm right and and
through whom we learn mmm right and and I just started a new I was just chatting
I just started a new I was just chatting
I just started a new I was just chatting with you about a second ago I started a
with you about a second ago I started a
with you about a second ago I started a new high-tech mobile enterprise software
new high-tech mobile enterprise software
new high-tech mobile enterprise software company
company
company yes right I am so out of my element but
yes right I am so out of my element but
yes right I am so out of my element but you know I’m raising money I’m hiring
you know I’m raising money I’m hiring
you know I’m raising money I’m hiring individuals I’m coming up with strategy
individuals I’m coming up with strategy
individuals I’m coming up with strategy I’m building a sales force I’m doing a
I’m building a sales force I’m doing a
I’m building a sales force I’m doing a lot of the stuff I know how to do a lot
lot of the stuff I know how to do a lot
lot of the stuff I know how to do a lot of I don’t know how to do
of I don’t know how to do
of I don’t know how to do I am finding mentors yeah left and right
I am finding mentors yeah left and right
I am finding mentors yeah left and right it’s survival you are yeah so mentorship
it’s survival you are yeah so mentorship
it’s survival you are yeah so mentorship to me is about relational learning and
to me is about relational learning and
to me is about relational learning and if you think about it that way then you
if you think about it that way then you
if you think about it that way then you then you don’t have a mentor you have
then you don’t have a mentor you have
then you don’t have a mentor you have many mentors what about your learning
many mentors what about your learning
many mentors what about your learning roadmap leadership is about earning
roadmap leadership is about earning
roadmap leadership is about earning permission to influence and the role
permission to influence and the role
permission to influence and the role doesn’t give you permission to influence
doesn’t give you permission to influence
doesn’t give you permission to influence most people think that the role does I
most people think that the role does I
most people think that the role does I mean it’s so you know you don’t I
mean it’s so you know you don’t I
mean it’s so you know you don’t I conversations with names that you would
conversations with names that you would
conversations with names that you would know who are CEOs of large corporations
know who are CEOs of large corporations
know who are CEOs of large corporations we laugh together on how the world
we laugh together on how the world
we laugh together on how the world thinks that all they have to do is say
thinks that all they have to do is say
thinks that all they have to do is say what they want and people will comply
what they want and people will comply
what they want and people will comply right
right
right nobody complies nobody complies people
nobody complies nobody complies people
nobody complies nobody complies people will do what they want to do they might
will do what they want to do they might
will do what they want to do they might do enough not to get fired or not to be
do enough not to get fired or not to be
do enough not to get fired or not to be you know openly disrespectful but deep
you know openly disrespectful but deep
you know openly disrespectful but deep down inside they’ll do what they want to
down inside they’ll do what they want to
down inside they’ll do what they want to do sir and leadership has to work their
do sir and leadership has to work their
do sir and leadership has to work their ass off
ass off
ass off vulnerable intimately f empathetically
vulnerable intimately f empathetically
vulnerable intimately f empathetically generously you use the word generosity
generously you use the word generosity
generously you use the word generosity sir generously to earn the right to ask
sir generously to earn the right to ask
sir generously to earn the right to ask someone to change and that’s a full-time
someone to change and that’s a full-time
someone to change and that’s a full-time job if any of you lead people if you’re
job if any of you lead people if you’re
job if any of you lead people if you’re not spending 30 percent of your time 30
not spending 30 percent of your time 30
not spending 30 percent of your time 30 percent of your time making each of your
percent of your time making each of your
percent of your time making each of your employees 30 percent better right you’re
employees 30 percent better right you’re
employees 30 percent better right you’re not doing your job as leader as opposed
not doing your job as leader as opposed
not doing your job as leader as opposed to most of your time being in meetings
to most of your time being in meetings
to most of your time being in meetings and dictating that’s a big shift like if
and dictating that’s a big shift like if
and dictating that’s a big shift like if I’m not just gonna tell my employer to
I’m not just gonna tell my employer to
I’m not just gonna tell my employer to do something today I gotta make them 30%
do something today I gotta make them 30%
do something today I gotta make them 30% better crap that’s a big investment a
better crap that’s a big investment a
better crap that’s a big investment a big investment
big investment
big investment now I come in and say okay now how do I
now I come in and say okay now how do I
now I come in and say okay now how do I do that well the first thing you got to
do that well the first thing you got to
do that well the first thing you got to do is you got to earn permission to if I
do is you got to earn permission to if I
do is you got to earn permission to if I gain vulnerability empathy sympathy care
gain vulnerability empathy sympathy care
gain vulnerability empathy sympathy care now I’m working with gravity right and
now I’m working with gravity right and
now I’m working with gravity right and so you got to open up gravity pour
so you got to open up gravity pour
so you got to open up gravity pour yourself as leadership and then it
yourself as leadership and then it
yourself as leadership and then it becomes joyful right then if then you
becomes joyful right then if then you
becomes joyful right then if then you start experiencing happiness because
start experiencing happiness because
start experiencing happiness because it’s two people in a relationship caring
it’s two people in a relationship caring
it’s two people in a relationship caring about each other moving an objective
about each other moving an objective
about each other moving an objective forward celebrating victory
forward celebrating victory
forward celebrating victory celebration becomes that the currency
celebration becomes that the currency
celebration becomes that the currency for momentum and this is happiness this
for momentum and this is happiness this
for momentum and this is happiness this is happiness then you’re getting in the
is happiness then you’re getting in the
is happiness then you’re getting in the groove and you’re in the flywheel of
groove and you’re in the flywheel of
groove and you’re in the flywheel of mutual support and giving a damn and
mutual support and giving a damn and
mutual support and giving a damn and people around you that care I mean
people around you that care I mean
people around you that care I mean that’s that’s happiness so here we were
that’s that’s happiness so here we were
that’s that’s happiness so here we were sitting along the side of the road is
sitting along the side of the road is
sitting along the side of the road is November
November
November Christmas is coming up and along the
Christmas is coming up and along the
Christmas is coming up and along the side of the road few yards in front of
side of the road few yards in front of
side of the road few yards in front of the car is a pallet trash and in that
the car is a pallet trash and in that
the car is a pallet trash and in that pile of trash there was a toy I don’t
pile of trash there was a toy I don’t
pile of trash there was a toy I don’t know if you know what a big wheel is
know if you know what a big wheel is
know if you know what a big wheel is like a three-wheeled plastic toy thing
like a three-wheeled plastic toy thing
like a three-wheeled plastic toy thing sticking out dad sees it he’s like wait
sticking out dad sees it he’s like wait
sticking out dad sees it he’s like wait I know he’s gonna go do he’s gonna go
I know he’s gonna go do he’s gonna go
I know he’s gonna go do he’s gonna go get me that big wheel it’s November we
get me that big wheel it’s November we
get me that big wheel it’s November we had been unemployed for literally six
had been unemployed for literally six
had been unemployed for literally six months at that time and back then when
months at that time and back then when
months at that time and back then when you were unemployed for six months you
you were unemployed for six months you
you were unemployed for six months you lost all of your pension when my pop
lost all of your pension when my pop
lost all of your pension when my pop died we didn’t have a pension we didn’t
died we didn’t have a pension we didn’t
died we didn’t have a pension we didn’t have any savings and we had a five
have any savings and we had a five
have any savings and we had a five thousand dollar life insurance policy
thousand dollar life insurance policy
thousand dollar life insurance policy that wasn’t enough to bury him right and
that wasn’t enough to bury him right and
that wasn’t enough to bury him right and you know we had to accept gifts to be
you know we had to accept gifts to be
you know we had to accept gifts to be able to bury my pop so there we were and
able to bury my pop so there we were and
able to bury my pop so there we were and Here I am afraid that my friends from my
Here I am afraid that my friends from my
Here I am afraid that my friends from my snooty school are gonna see us picking
snooty school are gonna see us picking
snooty school are gonna see us picking up trash so I’m hiding in the back of
up trash so I’m hiding in the back of
up trash so I’m hiding in the back of the car what do you think it takes for a
the car what do you think it takes for a
the car what do you think it takes for a proud 55 year old steel worker to walk
proud 55 year old steel worker to walk
proud 55 year old steel worker to walk up and get up a piece of trash with the
up and get up a piece of trash with the
up and get up a piece of trash with the Sun still in the car Sun visibly
Sun still in the car Sun visibly
Sun still in the car Sun visibly embarrassed piece of trash for sons
embarrassed piece of trash for sons
embarrassed piece of trash for sons Christmas present because that’s all he
Christmas present because that’s all he
Christmas present because that’s all he could do you know what my dad didn’t
could do you know what my dad didn’t
could do you know what my dad didn’t care my dad wanted to make sure that he
care my dad wanted to make sure that he
care my dad wanted to make sure that he had something for his family and that’s
had something for his family and that’s
had something for his family and that’s what mattered and he always said the
what mattered and he always said the
what mattered and he always said the same thing to me Akif don’t ever be
same thing to me Akif don’t ever be
same thing to me Akif don’t ever be afraid to ask
afraid to ask
afraid to ask worst anybody could ever say is no the
worst anybody could ever say is no the
worst anybody could ever say is no the first of two very important lessons in
first of two very important lessons in
first of two very important lessons in this story to all of us how many times
this story to all of us how many times
this story to all of us how many times have you backed down from what you knew
have you backed down from what you knew
have you backed down from what you knew you needed to do because you’re afraid
you needed to do because you’re afraid
you needed to do because you’re afraid to ask
to ask
to ask I really hope you’d send this message to
I really hope you’d send this message to
I really hope you’d send this message to your kids and grandkids because there
your kids and grandkids because there
your kids and grandkids because there were so many times that I didn’t think I
were so many times that I didn’t think I
were so many times that I didn’t think I deserve to be in that room so many times
deserve to be in that room so many times
deserve to be in that room so many times that I didn’t think that those rich
that I didn’t think that those rich
that I didn’t think that those rich people would accept me
people would accept me
people would accept me that I just plowed through a push
that I just plowed through a push
that I just plowed through a push through because my dad would always his
through because my dad would always his
through because my dad would always his voice would always come up don’t ever be
voice would always come up don’t ever be
voice would always come up don’t ever be afraid to ask the worst anybody could
afraid to ask the worst anybody could
afraid to ask the worst anybody could ever say is no to challenge I see with
ever say is no to challenge I see with
ever say is no to challenge I see with most people is that they don’t have a
most people is that they don’t have a
most people is that they don’t have a support group or an accountability group
support group or an accountability group
support group or an accountability group or mastermind or whatever you wanna call
or mastermind or whatever you wanna call
or mastermind or whatever you wanna call it so how does someone want first find
it so how does someone want first find
it so how does someone want first find that and figure out who the right people
that and figure out who the right people
that and figure out who the right people are that aren’t gonna suck the energy
are that aren’t gonna suck the energy
are that aren’t gonna suck the energy from them but they’re also gonna give
from them but they’re also gonna give
from them but they’re also gonna give and take it look it’s trial and error
and take it look it’s trial and error
and take it look it’s trial and error when ya
when ya
when ya when I wrote who’s got your back there’s
when I wrote who’s got your back there’s
when I wrote who’s got your back there’s a chapter in it that talks about the
a chapter in it that talks about the
a chapter in it that talks about the long slow dinner and you know I think by
long slow dinner and you know I think by
long slow dinner and you know I think by the time we’re done here in a short
the time we’re done here in a short
the time we’re done here in a short period of time I want everybody who’s
period of time I want everybody who’s
period of time I want everybody who’s watching us to have a relationship
watching us to have a relationship
watching us to have a relationship action plan so you know as we’re sitting
action plan so you know as we’re sitting
action plan so you know as we’re sitting here scribble down your goals and next
here scribble down your goals and next
here scribble down your goals and next to every goal start writing three to
to every goal start writing three to
to every goal start writing three to five people’s names critical to
five people’s names critical to
five people’s names critical to achieving those goals right that’s the
achieving those goals right that’s the
achieving those goals right that’s the opportunity group then I want you to ask
opportunity group then I want you to ask
opportunity group then I want you to ask yourself who to achieve my goal do I
yourself who to achieve my goal do I
yourself who to achieve my goal do I want to learn from write those names
want to learn from write those names
want to learn from write those names down then start imagining who the people
down then start imagining who the people
down then start imagining who the people that I could trust around four core or
that I could trust around four core or
that I could trust around four core or four core characteristics of the
four core characteristics of the
four core characteristics of the lifeline relationship and frankly all
lifeline relationship and frankly all
lifeline relationship and frankly all relationships but the but the tightest
relationships but the but the tightest
relationships but the but the tightest ones have to have four things number one
ones have to have four things number one
ones have to have four things number one is intimacy to the point of
is intimacy to the point of
is intimacy to the point of vulnerability mm can I tell you when you
vulnerability mm can I tell you when you
vulnerability mm can I tell you when you know I’m really feeling weak can I tell
know I’m really feeling weak can I tell
know I’m really feeling weak can I tell you when I’m up against the wall
you when I’m up against the wall
you when I’m up against the wall intimacy to the point of vulnerability
intimacy to the point of vulnerability
intimacy to the point of vulnerability second is generosity do I really want to
second is generosity do I really want to
second is generosity do I really want to help you and do you really want to help
help you and do you really want to help
help you and do you really want to help me do we care enough to help generosity
me do we care enough to help generosity
me do we care enough to help generosity candor will you tell me the truth right
candor will you tell me the truth right
candor will you tell me the truth right most intimate critical relationships lie
most intimate critical relationships lie
most intimate critical relationships lie to each other and they shouldn’t candor
to each other and they shouldn’t candor
to each other and they shouldn’t candor and conflict avoidance is horrible why
and conflict avoidance is horrible why
and conflict avoidance is horrible why do they lot of exhibit because they just
do they lot of exhibit because they just
do they lot of exhibit because they just don’t make each other feel bad vacation
don’t make each other feel bad vacation
don’t make each other feel bad vacation they think that that’s their role to
they think that that’s their role to
they think that that’s their role to make each other feel good look I mean I
make each other feel good look I mean I
make each other feel good look I mean I think a lot of it is the people don’t
think a lot of it is the people don’t
think a lot of it is the people don’t realize that relationships need to be
realize that relationships need to be
realize that relationships need to be leaned on the relationships aren’t
leaned on the relationships aren’t
leaned on the relationships aren’t scarce that they’re a lot of people are
scarce that they’re a lot of people are
scarce that they’re a lot of people are conflict avoidant out of psychological
conflict avoidant out of psychological
conflict avoidant out of psychological fear of abandonment I mean there’s a lot
fear of abandonment I mean there’s a lot
fear of abandonment I mean there’s a lot of insecurities and fear that drive our
of insecurities and fear that drive our
of insecurities and fear that drive our relational behaviors and the that I have
relational behaviors and the that I have
relational behaviors and the that I have to say that conflict avoidance has to be
to say that conflict avoidance has to be
to say that conflict avoidance has to be one of the most erosive the Roosevelts
one of the most erosive the Roosevelts
one of the most erosive the Roosevelts of organization on humans
of organization on humans
of organization on humans right so the the fourth is
right so the the fourth is
right so the the fourth is accountability hmm right
accountability hmm right
accountability hmm right but candor and accountability together
but candor and accountability together
but candor and accountability together make a high-performing relationship what
make a high-performing relationship what
make a high-performing relationship what I would do is I would list three people
I would do is I would list three people
I would do is I would list three people that you have a strong enough
that you have a strong enough
that you have a strong enough relationship with now you and I frankly
relationship with now you and I frankly
relationship with now you and I frankly you and I have a perfectly reasonable
you and I have a perfectly reasonable
you and I have a perfectly reasonable and strong enough relationship I call it
and strong enough relationship I call it
and strong enough relationship I call it a level 2 relationship okay right
a level 2 relationship okay right
a level 2 relationship okay right maybe we’re bordering on a three but
maybe we’re bordering on a three but
maybe we’re bordering on a three but certainly two to three and three is a
certainly two to three and three is a
certainly two to three and three is a strong relationship if if you want to go
strong relationship if if you want to go
strong relationship if if you want to go to a lifeline which like in my world of
to a lifeline which like in my world of
to a lifeline which like in my world of three plus uh-huh what you’re gonna do
three plus uh-huh what you’re gonna do
three plus uh-huh what you’re gonna do is you’re gonna go out and have a long
is you’re gonna go out and have a long
is you’re gonna go out and have a long slow dinner you’re gonna take your armor
slow dinner you’re gonna take your armor
slow dinner you’re gonna take your armor off and you’re gonna say look here’s
off and you’re gonna say look here’s
off and you’re gonna say look here’s what I want to do here’s what I’m afraid
what I want to do here’s what I’m afraid
what I want to do here’s what I’m afraid of
of
of and here’s how I think I’m gonna get
and here’s how I think I’m gonna get
and here’s how I think I’m gonna get there what do you think hmm and see how
there what do you think hmm and see how
there what do you think hmm and see how the person responds do they respond with
the person responds do they respond with
the person responds do they respond with candor do they a spawned respond with
candor do they a spawned respond with
candor do they a spawned respond with intimacy did they let their guards down
intimacy did they let their guards down
intimacy did they let their guards down do they respond with accountability at
do they respond with accountability at
do they respond with accountability at the end of the the dinner are they
the end of the the dinner are they
the end of the the dinner are they saying to you dude let’s talk next week
saying to you dude let’s talk next week
saying to you dude let’s talk next week because I think you should do these two
because I think you should do these two
because I think you should do these two or three things and I’m gonna hold you
or three things and I’m gonna hold you
or three things and I’m gonna hold you accountable for them damn it
accountable for them damn it
accountable for them damn it now if after the dinner they don’t call
now if after the dinner they don’t call
now if after the dinner they don’t call you the following week then maybe
you the following week then maybe
you the following week then maybe they’re not the right person to be your
they’re not the right person to be your
they’re not the right person to be your life lamb right right I know that was a
life lamb right right I know that was a
life lamb right right I know that was a very circuitous way to get to the answer
very circuitous way to get to the answer
very circuitous way to get to the answer your question that’s great what do most
your question that’s great what do most
your question that’s great what do most people do wrong when they approach the
people do wrong when they approach the
people do wrong when they approach the relationships and networks and your
relationships and networks and your
relationships and networks and your experience it’s a mindset and it’s a
experience it’s a mindset and it’s a
experience it’s a mindset and it’s a mindset of what’s in it for me right
mindset of what’s in it for me right
mindset of what’s in it for me right that’s the first thing it’s a mindset of
that’s the first thing it’s a mindset of
that’s the first thing it’s a mindset of what’s in it for me and it stinks on
what’s in it for me and it stinks on
what’s in it for me and it stinks on their suit a mile away what’s in it for
their suit a mile away what’s in it for
their suit a mile away what’s in it for me it needs to be a values based
me it needs to be a values based
me it needs to be a values based judgment of how you’re gonna live your
judgment of how you’re gonna live your
judgment of how you’re gonna live your life and and you’ve got a nun by the way
life and and you’ve got a nun by the way
life and and you’ve got a nun by the way I mean there’s an a a slogan called fake
I mean there’s an a a slogan called fake
I mean there’s an a a slogan called fake it to you make it so you know the point
it to you make it so you know the point
it to you make it so you know the point is that little by little by little
is that little by little by little
is that little by little by little you’ve got to be able to recondition
you’ve got to be able to recondition
you’ve got to be able to recondition your brain and that’s one of the things
your brain and that’s one of the things
your brain and that’s one of the things about human behavior change human
about human behavior change human
about human behavior change human behavior change doesn’t happen through
behavior change doesn’t happen through
behavior change doesn’t happen through knowledge if it happened through
knowledge if it happened through
knowledge if it happened through knowledge then nobody on a diet would
knowledge then nobody on a diet would
knowledge then nobody on a diet would eat a piece of cake right I mean the the
eat a piece of cake right I mean the the
eat a piece of cake right I mean the the the bottom line is we need to experience
the bottom line is we need to experience
the bottom line is we need to experience behavior change small doses of
behavior change small doses of
behavior change small doses of incremental experiences positive
incremental experiences positive
incremental experiences positive experiences not even negative
experiences not even negative
experiences not even negative experiences small doses of incremental
experiences small doses of incremental
experiences small doses of incremental positive experiences
positive experiences
positive experiences mindsets so you change the behavior to
mindsets so you change the behavior to
mindsets so you change the behavior to change the mindset we unfortunately have
change the mindset we unfortunately have
change the mindset we unfortunately have addictions and I used the word addiction
addictions and I used the word addiction
addictions and I used the word addiction and I follow things like 12-step
and I follow things like 12-step
and I follow things like 12-step programs and other mechanisms to shift
programs and other mechanisms to shift
programs and other mechanisms to shift behavioral addictions because everybody
behavioral addictions because everybody
behavioral addictions because everybody who’s watching this has an addiction
who’s watching this has an addiction
who’s watching this has an addiction there’s not a single person that isn’t
there’s not a single person that isn’t
there’s not a single person that isn’t addicted to feeling less than in a room
addicted to feeling less than in a room
addicted to feeling less than in a room procrastination you know some behavioral
procrastination you know some behavioral
procrastination you know some behavioral addiction that holds us back that you
addiction that holds us back that you
addiction that holds us back that you know being too shy being too insecure
know being too shy being too insecure
know being too shy being too insecure being too whatever
being too whatever
being too whatever tempers all these things are nothing
tempers all these things are nothing
tempers all these things are nothing more than addictive behaviors that we
more than addictive behaviors that we
more than addictive behaviors that we practice even though they don’t serve us
practice even though they don’t serve us
practice even though they don’t serve us well right so little tiny doses of new
well right so little tiny doses of new
well right so little tiny doses of new behaviors pushing yourself incrementally
behaviors pushing yourself incrementally
behaviors pushing yourself incrementally will will be the way in which we change
will will be the way in which we change
will will be the way in which we change those behaviors why do we mean someone
those behaviors why do we mean someone
those behaviors why do we mean someone to have our back you know these
to have our back you know these
to have our back you know these difficult times in this economy there
difficult times in this economy there
difficult times in this economy there are too many people that are under
are too many people that are under
are too many people that are under living whose dreams and aspirations
living whose dreams and aspirations
living whose dreams and aspirations aren’t being things that they’re parking
aren’t being things that they’re parking
aren’t being things that they’re parking them off to the side just in case of
them off to the side just in case of
them off to the side just in case of just having survival the key is we
just having survival the key is we
just having survival the key is we recognize that inside of all of us I
recognize that inside of all of us I
recognize that inside of all of us I think is greatness
think is greatness
think is greatness I think extraordinary things and we need
I think extraordinary things and we need
I think extraordinary things and we need other people to pull them out I don’t
other people to pull them out I don’t
other people to pull them out I don’t know if you ever heard the story of gene
know if you ever heard the story of gene
know if you ever heard the story of gene nitish who founded Weight Watchers and
nitish who founded Weight Watchers and
nitish who founded Weight Watchers and I’ve heard George Noory well what she
I’ve heard George Noory well what she
I’ve heard George Noory well what she realized was she was just out there
realized was she was just out there
realized was she was just out there dieting like the rest of them that
dieting like the rest of them that
dieting like the rest of them that wasn’t about knowing that that she had
wasn’t about knowing that that she had
wasn’t about knowing that that she had to eat less or exercise a little bit
to eat less or exercise a little bit
to eat less or exercise a little bit more but was when she started doing it
more but was when she started doing it
more but was when she started doing it with her girlfriends that they started
with her girlfriends that they started
with her girlfriends that they started holding each other accountable for the
holding each other accountable for the
holding each other accountable for the things they wanted to do that’s that
things they wanted to do that’s that
things they wanted to do that’s that that’s the point story is as a friend of
that’s the point story is as a friend of
that’s the point story is as a friend of mine calls it emotional transportation
mine calls it emotional transportation
mine calls it emotional transportation you know somebody says you know what are
you know somebody says you know what are
you know somebody says you know what are you really passionate about oh my kids
you really passionate about oh my kids
you really passionate about oh my kids great
you don’t really care it’s like you just
you don’t really care it’s like you just check the box but get them to tell you
check the box but get them to tell you
check the box but get them to tell you their story tell me tell me about that
their story tell me tell me about that
their story tell me tell me about that tell me why you’re so passionate about
tell me why you’re so passionate about
tell me why you’re so passionate about your children tell me a story tell me
your children tell me a story tell me
your children tell me a story tell me about their last birthday tell me about
about their last birthday tell me about
about their last birthday tell me about the last holiday that you experienced
the last holiday that you experienced
the last holiday that you experienced with them tell me what they did in the
with them tell me what they did in the
with them tell me what they did in the last couple of weeks that made you proud
last couple of weeks that made you proud
last couple of weeks that made you proud or scared or interested tell me a story
or scared or interested tell me a story
or scared or interested tell me a story what you’re doing and what I want all of
what you’re doing and what I want all of
what you’re doing and what I want all of us to do in this world and this will
us to do in this world and this will
us to do in this world and this will transform your life if you do nothing
transform your life if you do nothing
transform your life if you do nothing you take nothing away from the time that
you take nothing away from the time that
you take nothing away from the time that we’re gonna spend together going forward
we’re gonna spend together going forward
we’re gonna spend together going forward if you do nothing else but just remember
if you do nothing else but just remember
if you do nothing else but just remember this your jobs in life are to walk
this your jobs in life are to walk
this your jobs in life are to walk around the world creating an environment
around the world creating an environment
around the world creating an environment around yourself that invites people in
around yourself that invites people in
around yourself that invites people in to want to have a better relationship
to want to have a better relationship
to want to have a better relationship with you your job in this world is to
with you your job in this world is to
with you your job in this world is to walk around the world creating an
walk around the world creating an
walk around the world creating an environment that invites people in to
environment that invites people in to
environment that invites people in to want to have a better relationship with
want to have a better relationship with
want to have a better relationship with you
you
you god I just look out on this couple of
god I just look out on this couple of
god I just look out on this couple of thousand people and I just realize that
thousand people and I just realize that
thousand people and I just realize that if every one of you in this room or to
if every one of you in this room or to
if every one of you in this room or to begin to do that the the impact and the
begin to do that the the impact and the
begin to do that the the impact and the touch that would have on on your worlds
touch that would have on on your worlds
touch that would have on on your worlds and our society for that matter our
and our society for that matter our
and our society for that matter our churches aren’t as full as they used to
churches aren’t as full as they used to
churches aren’t as full as they used to be our community centers aren’t as full
be our community centers aren’t as full
be our community centers aren’t as full as they used to be people don’t join
as they used to be people don’t join
as they used to be people don’t join clubs they go into gyms they put iPods
clubs they go into gyms they put iPods
clubs they go into gyms they put iPods on and they isolate themselves where is
on and they isolate themselves where is
on and they isolate themselves where is our community naturally as human animals
our community naturally as human animals
our community naturally as human animals and we’re animals we are hardwired and
and we’re animals we are hardwired and
and we’re animals we are hardwired and designed to work in community back in
designed to work in community back in
designed to work in community back in the olden days they were called tribes
the olden days they were called tribes
the olden days they were called tribes in the way olden days when it was like
in the way olden days when it was like
in the way olden days when it was like 70,000 years ago when there were only 12
70,000 years ago when there were only 12
70,000 years ago when there were only 12 of those tribes in Africa and those
of those tribes in Africa and those
of those tribes in Africa and those groups if they didn’t connect
groups if they didn’t connect
groups if they didn’t connect come together they wouldn’t survive as a
come together they wouldn’t survive as a
come together they wouldn’t survive as a result as humans we are hard-wired to
result as humans we are hard-wired to
result as humans we are hard-wired to our DNA to our core to connect to serve
our DNA to our core to connect to serve
our DNA to our core to connect to serve to to help each other be successful
to to help each other be successful
to to help each other be successful because if we didn’t we were thrown out
because if we didn’t we were thrown out
because if we didn’t we were thrown out we’d be eaten by mountain lions by
we’d be eaten by mountain lions by
we’d be eaten by mountain lions by ourselves so we got to connect and we
ourselves so we got to connect and we
ourselves so we got to connect and we long for it when you do connect that’s
long for it when you do connect that’s
long for it when you do connect that’s your that’s your time that I say you
your that’s your time that I say you
your that’s your time that I say you feel an exhale and somebody actually
feel an exhale and somebody actually
feel an exhale and somebody actually makes you feel like you belong thank you
makes you feel like you belong thank you
makes you feel like you belong thank you so much for watching I made this video
so much for watching I made this video
so much for watching I made this video because b2 asked me to so there’s a
because b2 asked me to so there’s a
because b2 asked me to so there’s a famous entrepreneur that you I’ve made a
famous entrepreneur that you I’ve made a
famous entrepreneur that you I’ve made a profile next leave it in the comments
profile next leave it in the comments
profile next leave it in the comments below and I’ll see what I can do I also
below and I’ll see what I can do I also
below and I’ll see what I can do I also love to know which of Keith’s
love to know which of Keith’s
love to know which of Keith’s top 10 rules had the biggest impact on
top 10 rules had the biggest impact on
top 10 rules had the biggest impact on you and why leave it in the comments and
you and why leave it in the comments and
you and why leave it in the comments and I’ll join the discussion thank you so
I’ll join the discussion thank you so
I’ll join the discussion thank you so much for watching continue to believe
much for watching continue to believe
much for watching continue to believe and I’ll see you soon
”
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