[Music] I’ve always been a dream I can remember
I’ve always been a dream I can remember
I’ve always been a dream I can remember having many growing up here in New
having many growing up here in New
having many growing up here in New Jersey as a child I was a dream about
Jersey as a child I was a dream about
Jersey as a child I was a dream about the big dreams of having my career as a
the big dreams of having my career as a
the big dreams of having my career as a broadcast journalist and actually
broadcast journalist and actually
broadcast journalist and actually creating a family of my own but I
creating a family of my own but I
creating a family of my own but I actually had some few dreams of actually
actually had some few dreams of actually
actually had some few dreams of actually doing a TED talk so but never in my
doing a TED talk so but never in my
doing a TED talk so but never in my wildest dreams well I imagine doing one
wildest dreams well I imagine doing one
wildest dreams well I imagine doing one at a very area where my husband lost his
at a very area where my husband lost his
at a very area where my husband lost his life when I lost Brian my dream became a
life when I lost Brian my dream became a
life when I lost Brian my dream became a nightmare on November 29th 1999 a single
nightmare on November 29th 1999 a single
nightmare on November 29th 1999 a single gunshot wound to the face
news director turn happiness researcher
news director turn happiness researcher I can honestly talk about how I was able
I can honestly talk about how I was able
I can honestly talk about how I was able to come up with five life lessons that
to come up with five life lessons that
to come up with five life lessons that really helped me navigate through you
really helped me navigate through you
really helped me navigate through you know when I lost Brian I was actually
know when I lost Brian I was actually
know when I lost Brian I was actually living my dream job in in Philadelphia
living my dream job in in Philadelphia
living my dream job in in Philadelphia and I remember so so openly when when he
and I remember so so openly when when he
and I remember so so openly when when he was I was going through that loss that
was I was going through that loss that
was I was going through that loss that when he was working as a popular hip-hop
when he was working as a popular hip-hop
when he was working as a popular hip-hop DJ here in the area for actually a
DJ here in the area for actually a
DJ here in the area for actually a popular radio station in Philadelphia
popular radio station in Philadelphia
popular radio station in Philadelphia when I lost him I couldn’t listen to
when I lost him I couldn’t listen to
when I lost him I couldn’t listen to music for over a year
music for over a year
music for over a year matter of fact I couldn’t even listen to
matter of fact I couldn’t even listen to
matter of fact I couldn’t even listen to it in my car I didn’t even hum a tune it
it in my car I didn’t even hum a tune it
it in my car I didn’t even hum a tune it was actually just that painful I
was actually just that painful I
was actually just that painful I remember I would take showers and they
remember I would take showers and they
remember I would take showers and they were very long showers because I wanted
were very long showers because I wanted
were very long showers because I wanted to really wipe away the tears so one of
to really wipe away the tears so one of
to really wipe away the tears so one of the first lessons that I learned as a
the first lessons that I learned as a
the first lessons that I learned as a related to getting through loss was
related to getting through loss was
related to getting through loss was finding support and I found it in a
finding support and I found it in a
finding support and I found it in a therapist I met with her weekly and we
therapist I met with her weekly and we
therapist I met with her weekly and we talked about my loss and we talked about
talked about my loss and we talked about
talked about my loss and we talked about how to cope but then I also found it by
how to cope but then I also found it by
how to cope but then I also found it by looking and reading various books and
looking and reading various books and
looking and reading various books and one thing I wanted to do was to find out
one thing I wanted to do was to find out
one thing I wanted to do was to find out more information as it related to loss I
more information as it related to loss I
more information as it related to loss I found it in books that helped me talk
found it in books that helped me talk
found it in books that helped me talk about and learn about loneliness and
about and learn about loneliness and
about and learn about loneliness and renewal but I was in my 20s and I wanted
renewal but I was in my 20s and I wanted
renewal but I was in my 20s and I wanted to actually find out more about young
to actually find out more about young
to actually find out more about young widowhood
widowhood
widowhood I was able to find that support online
I was able to find that support online
I was able to find that support online and science actually supports this
and science actually supports this
and science actually supports this matter of fact science says that when
matter of fact science says that when
matter of fact science says that when you are trying to search for support you
you are trying to search for support you
you are trying to search for support you do so in regards to developing different
do so in regards to developing different
do so in regards to developing different groups in internet internet support
groups in internet internet support
groups in internet internet support groups so actually a few scholars out of
groups so actually a few scholars out of
groups so actually a few scholars out of the University
the University
the University Delaware and Hampton University and she
Delaware and Hampton University and she
Delaware and Hampton University and she did some research on his topic they
did some research on his topic they
did some research on his topic they interview 21 respondents between the
interview 21 respondents between the
interview 21 respondents between the ages of 30 and 50 and they found that
ages of 30 and 50 and they found that
ages of 30 and 50 and they found that about 85% of them gravitated towards
about 85% of them gravitated towards
about 85% of them gravitated towards Internet support groups because they
Internet support groups because they
Internet support groups because they wanted to connect with people with
wanted to connect with people with
wanted to connect with people with similar experiences the second most
similar experiences the second most
similar experiences the second most reason was emotional support they wanted
reason was emotional support they wanted
reason was emotional support they wanted to actually connect with people who were
to actually connect with people who were
to actually connect with people who were empathetic they wanted to be with people
empathetic they wanted to be with people
empathetic they wanted to be with people who simply got them and I could relate
who simply got them and I could relate
who simply got them and I could relate to that it’s clear that as humans we
to that it’s clear that as humans we
to that it’s clear that as humans we search for connection understanding but
search for connection understanding but
search for connection understanding but more importantly to cite a fellow
more importantly to cite a fellow
more importantly to cite a fellow TEDx speaker and scholar someone who I
TEDx speaker and scholar someone who I
TEDx speaker and scholar someone who I admire greatly dr. Brene brown we search
admire greatly dr. Brene brown we search
admire greatly dr. Brene brown we search for empathetic understanding so as I
for empathetic understanding so as I
for empathetic understanding so as I went through the process of grieving the
went through the process of grieving the
went through the process of grieving the loss of my husband I began to think
loss of my husband I began to think
loss of my husband I began to think about meaning I began to cover stories
about meaning I began to cover stories
about meaning I began to cover stories differently as a reporter at the time my
differently as a reporter at the time my
differently as a reporter at the time my news director actually would assign me
news director actually would assign me
news director actually would assign me to cover stories I’ve dealt with a lot
to cover stories I’ve dealt with a lot
to cover stories I’ve dealt with a lot of tragedies and loss he knew I would
of tragedies and loss he knew I would
of tragedies and loss he knew I would cover it with more empathy and when I
cover it with more empathy and when I
cover it with more empathy and when I was a news director myself I always
was a news director myself I always
was a news director myself I always thought about what can I do to make the
thought about what can I do to make the
thought about what can I do to make the lives of my news team better I wanted to
lives of my news team better I wanted to
lives of my news team better I wanted to see my talk show hosts and producers
see my talk show hosts and producers
see my talk show hosts and producers live their best life and then that grew
live their best life and then that grew
live their best life and then that grew into how can I make the world better and
into how can I make the world better and
into how can I make the world better and so I decided to actually get my PhD at
so I decided to actually get my PhD at
so I decided to actually get my PhD at the University of Florida and I ended up
the University of Florida and I ended up
the University of Florida and I ended up studying positive psychology the science
studying positive psychology the science
studying positive psychology the science of happiness and meaningful work and in
of happiness and meaningful work and in
of happiness and meaningful work and in that journey I found that my second life
that journey I found that my second life
that journey I found that my second life lesson well it’s all about following
lesson well it’s all about following
lesson well it’s all about following your passion and your purpose meaningful
your passion and your purpose meaningful
your passion and your purpose meaningful work scholars pose this question why am
work scholars pose this question why am
work scholars pose this question why am I here and when you’re trying to map out
I here and when you’re trying to map out
I here and when you’re trying to map out meaning you’re looking in terms of how
meaning you’re looking in terms of how
meaning you’re looking in terms of how to express your full potential
to express your full potential
to express your full potential developing inner self unifying with
developing inner self unifying with
developing inner self unifying with others service to others work that you
others service to others work that you
others service to others work that you hope is going to serve the greater good
hope is going to serve the greater good
hope is going to serve the greater good work that you hope
work that you hope
work that you hope is your calling for me meaningful work
is your calling for me meaningful work
is your calling for me meaningful work actually comes in a lot of forms it
actually comes in a lot of forms it
actually comes in a lot of forms it comes in terms of the fact that I joined
comes in terms of the fact that I joined
comes in terms of the fact that I joined the positive psychology movement to help
the positive psychology movement to help
the positive psychology movement to help people flourish and work in life and I
people flourish and work in life and I
people flourish and work in life and I also see it I see it in a journalist and
also see it I see it in a journalist and
also see it I see it in a journalist and executives that I coach to help them
executives that I coach to help them
executives that I coach to help them with well-being and happiness at work I
with well-being and happiness at work I
with well-being and happiness at work I also see it and all the mentees that I
also see it and all the mentees that I
also see it and all the mentees that I have all over the world that are showing
have all over the world that are showing
have all over the world that are showing off and taking over with their gifts and
off and taking over with their gifts and
off and taking over with their gifts and their talents and I also see it in my
their talents and I also see it in my
their talents and I also see it in my students that are thriving in my
students that are thriving in my
students that are thriving in my classroom at Georgia College see
classroom at Georgia College see
classroom at Georgia College see greatness can still be achieved through
greatness can still be achieved through
greatness can still be achieved through loss and grieving JK Rowling wrote the
loss and grieving JK Rowling wrote the
loss and grieving JK Rowling wrote the magical pages of Harry Potter after the
magical pages of Harry Potter after the
magical pages of Harry Potter after the loss of her mother and I also see it in
loss of her mother and I also see it in
loss of her mother and I also see it in a dear friend and colleague a fellow
a dear friend and colleague a fellow
a dear friend and colleague a fellow journalists Tanisha Belle Tanisha is a
journalists Tanisha Belle Tanisha is a
journalists Tanisha Belle Tanisha is a former network TV executive turned media
former network TV executive turned media
former network TV executive turned media entrepreneur and she’s making headlines
entrepreneur and she’s making headlines
entrepreneur and she’s making headlines because of her personal narrative
because of her personal narrative
because of her personal narrative Tanisha lost her father at four years
Tanisha lost her father at four years
Tanisha lost her father at four years old
old
old he was murdered he was murdered by youth
he was murdered he was murdered by youth
he was murdered he was murdered by youth in Chicago the ages of those young men
in Chicago the ages of those young men
in Chicago the ages of those young men that shot him were 15 19 and 21 yet she
that shot him were 15 19 and 21 yet she
that shot him were 15 19 and 21 yet she turned her adversity adversity into the
turned her adversity adversity into the
turned her adversity adversity into the ultimate form of all tourism Tanisha has
ultimate form of all tourism Tanisha has
ultimate form of all tourism Tanisha has created a scholarship fund in honor of
created a scholarship fund in honor of
created a scholarship fund in honor of her father to help youth all over the
her father to help youth all over the
her father to help youth all over the country her work is giving opportunities
country her work is giving opportunities
country her work is giving opportunities to so many youth that may not have had
to so many youth that may not have had
to so many youth that may not have had it which brings me to legacy you know
it which brings me to legacy you know
it which brings me to legacy you know Steven Covey he told us to always think
Steven Covey he told us to always think
Steven Covey he told us to always think of the end in mind now that can seem a
of the end in mind now that can seem a
of the end in mind now that can seem a little daunting when you’re dealing with
little daunting when you’re dealing with
little daunting when you’re dealing with loss and grief but it can also be
loss and grief but it can also be
loss and grief but it can also be motivating and healing recently at my
motivating and healing recently at my
motivating and healing recently at my mother’s funeral I discussed that all
mother’s funeral I discussed that all
mother’s funeral I discussed that all the lessons that she taught me and
the lessons that she taught me and
the lessons that she taught me and philosophies I told I talked about how
philosophies I told I talked about how
philosophies I told I talked about how keeping those philosophies alive keeps
keeping those philosophies alive keeps
keeping those philosophies alive keeps her alive keeps her legacy alive so our
her alive keeps her legacy alive so our
her alive keeps her legacy alive so our loved ones can continue to live through
loved ones can continue to live through
loved ones can continue to live through us they can continue to live through you
us they can continue to live through you
us they can continue to live through you so the third lesson in elevation is
so the third lesson in elevation is
so the third lesson in elevation is gratitude
gratitude
gratitude I tell you Oprah got it right
I tell you Oprah got it right
I tell you Oprah got it right when she told us to write in our
when she told us to write in our
when she told us to write in our gratitude journals and she invited
gratitude journals and she invited
gratitude journals and she invited scholars from all over the world to
scholars from all over the world to
scholars from all over the world to teach us how to write in those journals
teach us how to write in those journals
teach us how to write in those journals and she advised us to share our thoughts
and she advised us to share our thoughts
and she advised us to share our thoughts well I like to keep mine in a jar the
well I like to keep mine in a jar the
well I like to keep mine in a jar the picture I have a picture on my Instagram
picture I have a picture on my Instagram
picture I have a picture on my Instagram page that actually shows all the
page that actually shows all the
page that actually shows all the different notes that I write that I put
different notes that I write that I put
different notes that I write that I put into the jar because I like to see my
into the jar because I like to see my
into the jar because I like to see my blessings grow I like to see them
blessings grow I like to see them
blessings grow I like to see them visually I’m also grateful that even
visually I’m also grateful that even
visually I’m also grateful that even though my husband died two months after
though my husband died two months after
though my husband died two months after we would I’m grateful that we had eight
we would I’m grateful that we had eight
we would I’m grateful that we had eight years together we were college
years together we were college
years together we were college sweethearts at Delaware State University
sweethearts at Delaware State University
sweethearts at Delaware State University and I cherished those two months I
and I cherished those two months I
and I cherished those two months I remember when I wanted to push back our
remember when I wanted to push back our
remember when I wanted to push back our wedding because my mother was diagnosed
wedding because my mother was diagnosed
wedding because my mother was diagnosed and she had to have emergency surgery
and she had to have emergency surgery
and she had to have emergency surgery prior to our wedding day and I told
prior to our wedding day and I told
prior to our wedding day and I told Bryan we can’t get married without mom
Bryan we can’t get married without mom
Bryan we can’t get married without mom there he looked at me and he said
there he looked at me and he said
there he looked at me and he said Courtney we’re going to we aren’t
Courtney we’re going to we aren’t
Courtney we’re going to we aren’t changing our date even if we get married
changing our date even if we get married
changing our date even if we get married right here in this hospital by your
right here in this hospital by your
right here in this hospital by your mom’s bedside we’re getting married on a
mom’s bedside we’re getting married on a
mom’s bedside we’re getting married on a date we’ve decided that we chose he also
date we’ve decided that we chose he also
date we’ve decided that we chose he also added that I went at my entire life to
added that I went at my entire life to
added that I went at my entire life to marry you so just two months ago well my
marry you so just two months ago well my
marry you so just two months ago well my mother’s health declined and my father
mother’s health declined and my father
mother’s health declined and my father gave me a call at my job to tell me that
gave me a call at my job to tell me that
gave me a call at my job to tell me that the doctors are saying that your mother
the doctors are saying that your mother
the doctors are saying that your mother is experiencing the stages of death what
is experiencing the stages of death what
is experiencing the stages of death what does that mean I didn’t know what to
does that mean I didn’t know what to
does that mean I didn’t know what to make sense of that so I began to learn
make sense of that so I began to learn
make sense of that so I began to learn about pre active death an anticipatory
about pre active death an anticipatory
about pre active death an anticipatory grief see Brian’s death made me
grief see Brian’s death made me
grief see Brian’s death made me cherished mom’s death see I was grateful
cherished mom’s death see I was grateful
cherished mom’s death see I was grateful that I could rush to the hospital I was
that I could rush to the hospital I was
that I could rush to the hospital I was grateful that we could take her home to
grateful that we could take her home to
grateful that we could take her home to peacefully die I was also grateful to
peacefully die I was also grateful to
peacefully die I was also grateful to hold her hand and tell her how much I
hold her hand and tell her how much I
hold her hand and tell her how much I appreciated and loved and thanked her
appreciated and loved and thanked her
appreciated and loved and thanked her for being my mom I was grateful because
for being my mom I was grateful because
for being my mom I was grateful because I compared it to my time with Brian see
I compared it to my time with Brian see
I compared it to my time with Brian see I never said goodbye to him by the time
I never said goodbye to him by the time
I never said goodbye to him by the time I was able to reach by him at
I was able to reach by him at
I was able to reach by him at Hospital he was already at the morgue so
Hospital he was already at the morgue so
Hospital he was already at the morgue so my experience what my mom was different
my experience what my mom was different
my experience what my mom was different with the help of hospice nurses I was
with the help of hospice nurses I was
with the help of hospice nurses I was able to be part of a process of bathing
able to be part of a process of bathing
able to be part of a process of bathing her and getting her dress and I shared
her and getting her dress and I shared
her and getting her dress and I shared this experience with my father and my
this experience with my father and my
this experience with my father and my brother and other family members it was
brother and other family members it was
brother and other family members it was beautiful yet a sad experience because I
beautiful yet a sad experience because I
beautiful yet a sad experience because I recall washing her clothes during that
recall washing her clothes during that
recall washing her clothes during that period and thinking that she will wear
period and thinking that she will wear
period and thinking that she will wear it for the last time but every second I
it for the last time but every second I
it for the last time but every second I cherished I cherished it even when she
cherished I cherished it even when she
cherished I cherished it even when she wasn’t responsive and I cherished it
wasn’t responsive and I cherished it
wasn’t responsive and I cherished it even when she had her last breath see
even when she had her last breath see
even when she had her last breath see science supports gratitude scientists
science supports gratitude scientists
science supports gratitude scientists share that individuals with higher
share that individuals with higher
share that individuals with higher levels of gratitude are more likely to
levels of gratitude are more likely to
levels of gratitude are more likely to use positive framings in regards to
use positive framings in regards to
use positive framings in regards to negative events which will help them
negative events which will help them
negative events which will help them engage in a more manageable and
engage in a more manageable and
engage in a more manageable and meaningful life now forgiveness was also
meaningful life now forgiveness was also
meaningful life now forgiveness was also key in my healing remember his business
key in my healing remember his business
key in my healing remember his business partner and friend that accidentally
partner and friend that accidentally
partner and friend that accidentally shot him I could have spent 17 years in
shot him I could have spent 17 years in
shot him I could have spent 17 years in anger but yet I chose happiness actually
anger but yet I chose happiness actually
anger but yet I chose happiness actually forgiveness because science supports
forgiveness because science supports
forgiveness because science supports forgiveness and gratitude with both
forgiveness and gratitude with both
forgiveness and gratitude with both positively and strongly associated with
positively and strongly associated with
positively and strongly associated with well-being so I actually did choose
well-being so I actually did choose
well-being so I actually did choose happiness and I’m not going to pretend
happiness and I’m not going to pretend
happiness and I’m not going to pretend that I’m superwoman that I have
that I’m superwoman that I have
that I’m superwoman that I have superpowers I just know that a process
superpowers I just know that a process
superpowers I just know that a process I’ve given myself to permission to be
I’ve given myself to permission to be
I’ve given myself to permission to be human because losing loved ones kind of
human because losing loved ones kind of
human because losing loved ones kind of puts you through a rollercoaster of
puts you through a rollercoaster of
puts you through a rollercoaster of emotion so my life lasts life lesson is
emotion so my life lasts life lesson is
emotion so my life lasts life lesson is self-care I battled depression in this
self-care I battled depression in this
self-care I battled depression in this journey and other hardships
journey and other hardships
journey and other hardships however self-care is probably my
however self-care is probably my
however self-care is probably my greatest strength sometimes that means
greatest strength sometimes that means
greatest strength sometimes that means telling people that I love that what
telling people that I love that what
telling people that I love that what they’re saying to me is not very
they’re saying to me is not very
they’re saying to me is not very comforting or that I need more help
comforting or that I need more help
comforting or that I need more help matter of fact I remember my husband’s
matter of fact I remember my husband’s
matter of fact I remember my husband’s funeral and a woman that I didn’t know
funeral and a woman that I didn’t know
funeral and a woman that I didn’t know she approached me and she said I’m so
she approached me and she said I’m so
she approached me and she said I’m so sorry for your loss she said to me
sorry for your loss she said to me
sorry for your loss she said to me you’re so beautiful
you’re so beautiful
you’re so beautiful I appreciated the compliment she also
I appreciated the compliment she also
I appreciated the compliment she also added
added
added don’t worry you’ll find another husband
don’t worry you’ll find another husband
don’t worry you’ll find another husband you can laugh I now laugh about that
you can laugh I now laugh about that
you can laugh I now laugh about that story and I’m glad I can laugh now but
story and I’m glad I can laugh now but
story and I’m glad I can laugh now but back then it was very hard to hear even
back then it was very hard to hear even
back then it was very hard to hear even though her intent might have come from a
though her intent might have come from a
though her intent might have come from a good place it was just really hard to
good place it was just really hard to
good place it was just really hard to hear that back then and Madoff at grief
hear that back then and Madoff at grief
hear that back then and Madoff at grief com provides some real insight on what
com provides some real insight on what
com provides some real insight on what not to say to someone when grieving for
not to say to someone when grieving for
not to say to someone when grieving for some reason my situation did not make
some reason my situation did not make
some reason my situation did not make their list but they do provide great
their list but they do provide great
their list but they do provide great tips on what to say
tips on what to say
tips on what to say and actually silence is probably one of
and actually silence is probably one of
and actually silence is probably one of my favorite silence just being with that
my favorite silence just being with that
my favorite silence just being with that very that person and I think for us it
very that person and I think for us it
very that person and I think for us it can be a little frightening because we
can be a little frightening because we
can be a little frightening because we think tably want to fix things and help
think tably want to fix things and help
think tably want to fix things and help that person but sometimes silence can
that person but sometimes silence can
that person but sometimes silence can actually help the grieving person feel
actually help the grieving person feel
actually help the grieving person feel heard I will tell you that you know
heard I will tell you that you know
heard I will tell you that you know grief is an individual journey and what
grief is an individual journey and what
grief is an individual journey and what brings you comfort may not bring the
brings you comfort may not bring the
brings you comfort may not bring the next person comfort so we have to really
next person comfort so we have to really
next person comfort so we have to really take cues from those that are grieving
take cues from those that are grieving
take cues from those that are grieving we have to really learn how to be more
we have to really learn how to be more
we have to really learn how to be more empathetic one thing about grief that
empathetic one thing about grief that
empathetic one thing about grief that I’ve learned is that it makes me crave
I’ve learned is that it makes me crave
I’ve learned is that it makes me crave talking wanting to share and talk things
talking wanting to share and talk things
talking wanting to share and talk things out I think one of the greatest gifts
out I think one of the greatest gifts
out I think one of the greatest gifts that my friends have given me has been
that my friends have given me has been
that my friends have given me has been active listening sometimes in order for
active listening sometimes in order for
active listening sometimes in order for that to happen I may have to send them a
that to happen I may have to send them a
that to happen I may have to send them a text or a call to let them know I’m on
text or a call to let them know I’m on
text or a call to let them know I’m on that roller coaster and they’re right
that roller coaster and they’re right
that roller coaster and they’re right there another great gift has come out of
there another great gift has come out of
there another great gift has come out of my new academic home at Georgia College
my new academic home at Georgia College
my new academic home at Georgia College see mmm I started my contract August 1st
see mmm I started my contract August 1st
see mmm I started my contract August 1st by August 31st my mother died my
by August 31st my mother died my
by August 31st my mother died my colleagues at the school they barely
colleagues at the school they barely
colleagues at the school they barely know me
know me
know me they’re still getting to know me but
they’re still getting to know me but
they’re still getting to know me but they came into my office and let me know
they came into my office and let me know
they came into my office and let me know if I wanted to take any time off just to
if I wanted to take any time off just to
if I wanted to take any time off just to grieve that they would be there that
grieve that they would be there that
grieve that they would be there that gift was one of the greatest gifts that
gift was one of the greatest gifts that
gift was one of the greatest gifts that they could ever give me that gift allows
they could ever give me that gift allows
they could ever give me that gift allows me to be present
me to be present
me to be present fulfilled I will also say that humor
fulfilled I will also say that humor
fulfilled I will also say that humor helps last night I spent a wonderful
helps last night I spent a wonderful
helps last night I spent a wonderful evening with my late husband’s friends
evening with my late husband’s friends
evening with my late husband’s friends and we talked about all these great
and we talked about all these great
and we talked about all these great stories as related to him that brought
stories as related to him that brought
stories as related to him that brought me a great deal of comfort I would tell
me a great deal of comfort I would tell
me a great deal of comfort I would tell you also that one of my fondest memories
you also that one of my fondest memories
you also that one of my fondest memories is making my mother smile and laugh on
is making my mother smile and laugh on
is making my mother smile and laugh on her deathbed
her deathbed
her deathbed I tell you humor done responsibly can be
I tell you humor done responsibly can be
I tell you humor done responsibly can be a healer and if you remember one thing
a healer and if you remember one thing
a healer and if you remember one thing for me I really hope you remember this
for me I really hope you remember this
for me I really hope you remember this there is no one-size-fits-all
there is no one-size-fits-all
there is no one-size-fits-all to brief you got to feel your way
to brief you got to feel your way
to brief you got to feel your way through you have to find elements that
through you have to find elements that
through you have to find elements that comfort you it may be one or two of the
comfort you it may be one or two of the
comfort you it may be one or two of the things that I’ve mentioned and all the
things that I’ve mentioned and all the
things that I’ve mentioned and all the things that I’ve helped other people and
things that I’ve helped other people and
things that I’ve helped other people and like the theme of this TEDx women event
like the theme of this TEDx women event
like the theme of this TEDx women event it’s about time and I want to say
it’s about time and I want to say
it’s about time and I want to say speaking of time I actually wear my late
speaking of time I actually wear my late
speaking of time I actually wear my late husband’s watch I’ve been wearing it for
husband’s watch I’ve been wearing it for
husband’s watch I’ve been wearing it for 17 years he wore it when he died and his
17 years he wore it when he died and his
17 years he wore it when he died and his watch reminds me about time and about
watch reminds me about time and about
watch reminds me about time and about comfort it reminds me to be present it
comfort it reminds me to be present it
comfort it reminds me to be present it reminds me to be more empathetic it
reminds me to be more empathetic it
reminds me to be more empathetic it reminds me to make sure that the people
reminds me to make sure that the people
reminds me to make sure that the people that are in my life don’t leave without
that are in my life don’t leave without
that are in my life don’t leave without understanding how important they are
understanding how important they are
understanding how important they are compliments and knowing your value or
compliments and knowing your value or
compliments and knowing your value or the two things you’re going to
the two things you’re going to
the two things you’re going to experience when you’re with me see that
experience when you’re with me see that
experience when you’re with me see that morning that I left my husband to rush
morning that I left my husband to rush
morning that I left my husband to rush to the news room I thought I would have
to the news room I thought I would have
to the news room I thought I would have that evening with him I never did death
that evening with him I never did death
that evening with him I never did death has taught me that life isn’t promised
has taught me that life isn’t promised
has taught me that life isn’t promised and that you better make sure that
and that you better make sure that
and that you better make sure that people in your life know how important
people in your life know how important
people in your life know how important they are
they are
they are I tell you peanuts the cartoon happens
I tell you peanuts the cartoon happens
I tell you peanuts the cartoon happens to be one of my favorite cartoons
to be one of my favorite cartoons
to be one of my favorite cartoons starring Charlie Brown right and he
starring Charlie Brown right and he
starring Charlie Brown right and he would reference good grief a lot often
would reference good grief a lot often
would reference good grief a lot often when he was frustrated I’m had my own
when he was frustrated I’m had my own
when he was frustrated I’m had my own spin on it
spin on it
spin on it if you find any good and grief is that
if you find any good and grief is that
if you find any good and grief is that it makes us value time it makes you want
it makes us value time it makes you want
it makes us value time it makes you want to live more love more and it is a
to live more love more and it is a
to live more love more and it is a reminder that time
reminder that time
reminder that time ticking see death motivates us to live
ticking see death motivates us to live
ticking see death motivates us to live to live a fulfilling life to live a
to live a fulfilling life to live a
to live a fulfilling life to live a meaningful life to live a happy life and
meaningful life to live a happy life and
meaningful life to live a happy life and when you’re dealing with the nightmare
when you’re dealing with the nightmare
when you’re dealing with the nightmare of grief we must learn to live a life
of grief we must learn to live a life
of grief we must learn to live a life where sometimes we must have to create
where sometimes we must have to create
where sometimes we must have to create new dreams yet still honoring those that
new dreams yet still honoring those that
new dreams yet still honoring those that touched our lives with passion and
touched our lives with passion and
touched our lives with passion and purpose just know that your time is
purpose just know that your time is
purpose just know that your time is right now thank you
”
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