so if I’m nervous today I will blame all the nervousness to the Indian man
the nervousness to the Indian man
the nervousness to the Indian man because I’m talking about flirting and
because I’m talking about flirting and
because I’m talking about flirting and all the Indian men are so nervous every
all the Indian men are so nervous every
all the Indian men are so nervous every time they are on table with me so if I
time they are on table with me so if I
time they are on table with me so if I know is so you know we’re to blame right
know is so you know we’re to blame right
know is so you know we’re to blame right we don’t have much education in terms of
we don’t have much education in terms of
we don’t have much education in terms of men flirting with disability all men
men flirting with disability all men
men flirting with disability all men flirting in general I think so I was
flirting in general I think so I was
flirting in general I think so I was browsing this amazing handsome guy I
browsing this amazing handsome guy I
browsing this amazing handsome guy I swiped right I was like wow he could
swiped right I was like wow he could
swiped right I was like wow he could drink a mug of beer in 0.29 seconds okay
drink a mug of beer in 0.29 seconds okay
drink a mug of beer in 0.29 seconds okay and I was like oh I should definitely
and I was like oh I should definitely
and I was like oh I should definitely experience a guy who can gulp beer in
experience a guy who can gulp beer in
experience a guy who can gulp beer in like 0.2 nine seconds and I was like wow
like 0.2 nine seconds and I was like wow
like 0.2 nine seconds and I was like wow and his handsome traveled around the
and his handsome traveled around the
and his handsome traveled around the world and I guess definitely I am going
world and I guess definitely I am going
world and I guess definitely I am going to swipe this guy right and the guy all
to swipe this guy right and the guy all
to swipe this guy right and the guy all just swipe right woo years ago like
just swipe right woo years ago like
just swipe right woo years ago like super duper match right and we go on the
super duper match right and we go on the
super duper match right and we go on the first date wonderful lovely night you
first date wonderful lovely night you
first date wonderful lovely night you know we talk about each other’s you know
know we talk about each other’s you know
know we talk about each other’s you know likes and dislikes and we definitely
likes and dislikes and we definitely
likes and dislikes and we definitely snap with each other and I was like wow
snap with each other and I was like wow
snap with each other and I was like wow this is happening
this is happening
this is happening right and we meet again and again it
right and we meet again and again it
right and we meet again and again it gets more closer and one day he calls me
gets more closer and one day he calls me
gets more closer and one day he calls me home it’s like why don’t you come home
home it’s like why don’t you come home
home it’s like why don’t you come home right I would want to take you home and
right I would want to take you home and
right I would want to take you home and I’m like really it is happening through
I’m like really it is happening through
I’m like really it is happening through tinder right
tinder right
tinder right yeah and and I go home and they’re in
yeah and and I go home and they’re in
yeah and and I go home and they’re in this lovely house you know of his very
this lovely house you know of his very
this lovely house you know of his very had this beautiful you know garden and
had this beautiful you know garden and
had this beautiful you know garden and stairs and his mum was also around which
stairs and his mum was also around which
stairs and his mum was also around which made it a little more cliche but yeah I
made it a little more cliche but yeah I
made it a little more cliche but yeah I said hello that’s it we didn’t talk much
said hello that’s it we didn’t talk much
said hello that’s it we didn’t talk much to the aunt right we kept going and we
to the aunt right we kept going and we
to the aunt right we kept going and we spent the entire night in the terrace
spent the entire night in the terrace
spent the entire night in the terrace and it was lovely and we snapped really
and it was lovely and we snapped really
and it was lovely and we snapped really well is it happening
well is it happening
well is it happening this wasn’t a story of mine this was a
this wasn’t a story of mine this was a
this wasn’t a story of mine this was a story of a very close friend of mine who
story of a very close friend of mine who
story of a very close friend of mine who shared her tender experience on how
shared her tender experience on how
shared her tender experience on how dating happens this never happened to me
dating happens this never happened to me
dating happens this never happened to me never right so let me rewind let me let
never right so let me rewind let me let
never right so let me rewind let me let me tell you why
me tell you why
me tell you why who is this lady here right what who is
who is this lady here right what who is
who is this lady here right what who is who am i right really I have shackled
who am i right really I have shackled
who am i right really I have shackled the stereotypes the myths and the social
the stereotypes the myths and the social
the stereotypes the myths and the social norms off of women especially an Indian
norms off of women especially an Indian
norms off of women especially an Indian women with a severe disability today I’m
women with a severe disability today I’m
women with a severe disability today I’m here not to talk about my success
here not to talk about my success
here not to talk about my success professionally I have a ten years of
professionally I have a ten years of
professionally I have a ten years of successful kill here or I’m not gonna
successful kill here or I’m not gonna
successful kill here or I’m not gonna talk about how I made it how challenging
talk about how I made it how challenging
talk about how I made it how challenging you know was my life and how I I could
you know was my life and how I I could
you know was my life and how I I could break through and be here to talk to you
break through and be here to talk to you
break through and be here to talk to you all here right but I’m going to be
all here right but I’m going to be
all here right but I’m going to be talking about love
talking about love
talking about love disability intimacy men Indian men we’ll
disability intimacy men Indian men we’ll
disability intimacy men Indian men we’ll get there soon
get there soon
get there soon and relationship right and for the past
and relationship right and for the past
and relationship right and for the past two to three days I have had lot of
two to three days I have had lot of
two to three days I have had lot of internal conversations within me of this
internal conversations within me of this
internal conversations within me of this topic right that is very very close to
topic right that is very very close to
topic right that is very very close to me let me tell you I was a dropout kid I
me let me tell you I was a dropout kid I
me let me tell you I was a dropout kid I was a drop out of school even before the
was a drop out of school even before the
was a drop out of school even before the biology teacher taught you about the
biology teacher taught you about the
biology teacher taught you about the reproductive organs which I didn’t
reproductive organs which I didn’t
reproductive organs which I didn’t attend for that matter I was hooked to
attend for that matter I was hooked to
attend for that matter I was hooked to TV I was hooked to video games I was
TV I was hooked to video games I was
TV I was hooked to video games I was hooked to Michael Jackson right and I
hooked to Michael Jackson right and I
hooked to Michael Jackson right and I knew love was in the air and I’ve dreamt
knew love was in the air and I’ve dreamt
knew love was in the air and I’ve dreamt about love from the age of say ten eight
about love from the age of say ten eight
about love from the age of say ten eight my early childhood because I was exposed
my early childhood because I was exposed
my early childhood because I was exposed to TV I was exposed to many things but
to TV I was exposed to many things but
to TV I was exposed to many things but the fact is right since I was a girl who
the fact is right since I was a girl who
the fact is right since I was a girl who didn’t experience the world like any
didn’t experience the world like any
didn’t experience the world like any other girl would do I was put away from
other girl would do I was put away from
other girl would do I was put away from this community of you know people or
this community of you know people or
this community of you know people or experiences and I stayed for a very long
experiences and I stayed for a very long
experiences and I stayed for a very long time under four walls like those two to
time under four walls like those two to
time under four walls like those two to be very frank I I was closed doors for
be very frank I I was closed doors for
be very frank I I was closed doors for fifteen years so I would how’d I get all
fifteen years so I would how’d I get all
fifteen years so I would how’d I get all the experiences of you know right
the experiences of you know right
the experiences of you know right meeting management at school or may not
meeting management at school or may not
meeting management at school or may not college or men at I have no experience
college or men at I have no experience
college or men at I have no experience there right my earlier class that I had
there right my earlier class that I had
there right my earlier class that I had who was my neighbor right very cool kid
who was my neighbor right very cool kid
who was my neighbor right very cool kid right I know I’m calling him kid sorry
right I know I’m calling him kid sorry
right I know I’m calling him kid sorry back then you know we were the same age
back then you know we were the same age
back then you know we were the same age I had so much of crush in him I
I had so much of crush in him I
I had so much of crush in him I experienced the butterflies that every
experienced the butterflies that every
experienced the butterflies that every women experiences I wanted to
women experiences I wanted to
women experiences I wanted to you know you know meet with him every
you know you know meet with him every
you know you know meet with him every day I wish I could see him every day
day I wish I could see him every day
day I wish I could see him every day he did and he waved at me every day as
he did and he waved at me every day as
he did and he waved at me every day as well
well
well right and the class grew and grew and
right and the class grew and grew and
right and the class grew and grew and grew and you know we started talking but
grew and you know we started talking but
grew and you know we started talking but one thing that I saw is he wasn’t seeing
one thing that I saw is he wasn’t seeing
one thing that I saw is he wasn’t seeing me the way I was seeing him he wasn’t in
me the way I was seeing him he wasn’t in
me the way I was seeing him he wasn’t in the slightest crush whatsoever but I
the slightest crush whatsoever but I
the slightest crush whatsoever but I wasn’t totally out of stock for that boy
wasn’t totally out of stock for that boy
wasn’t totally out of stock for that boy and I was young and when I said him that
and I was young and when I said him that
and I was young and when I said him that I really loved you at that age
I really loved you at that age
I really loved you at that age see I did I still you know good get
see I did I still you know good get
see I did I still you know good get access to all this when I told him that
access to all this when I told him that
access to all this when I told him that he said I thought you never knew about
he said I thought you never knew about
he said I thought you never knew about love I thought you never knew about many
love I thought you never knew about many
love I thought you never knew about many things that is associated with love I’m
things that is associated with love I’m
things that is associated with love I’m like why why would you say that
like why why would you say that
like why why would you say that he said you’re dropped out of school and
he said you’re dropped out of school and
he said you’re dropped out of school and you’re at home and I thought you
you’re at home and I thought you
you’re at home and I thought you wouldn’t associate me like that
wouldn’t associate me like that
wouldn’t associate me like that I said I really love you I have that
I said I really love you I have that
I said I really love you I have that feelings for you but soon it traded away
feelings for you but soon it traded away
feelings for you but soon it traded away and he put me back bench in terms of me
and he put me back bench in terms of me
and he put me back bench in terms of me wanting to approach a guy right pretty
wanting to approach a guy right pretty
wanting to approach a guy right pretty soon I was closed doors thinking I
soon I was closed doors thinking I
soon I was closed doors thinking I cannot approach a man because I do not
cannot approach a man because I do not
cannot approach a man because I do not have that experience I was still trying
have that experience I was still trying
have that experience I was still trying to identify myself to many people so we
to identify myself to many people so we
to identify myself to many people so we I you know I completely you know
I you know I completely you know
I you know I completely you know off-track myself and I proved this world
off-track myself and I proved this world
off-track myself and I proved this world I can do this I can go I can work I can
I can do this I can go I can work I can
I can do this I can go I can work I can find a job for myself I Blake I broke
find a job for myself I Blake I broke
find a job for myself I Blake I broke all the barriers that was around me
all the barriers that was around me
all the barriers that was around me right and then for the past ten years
right and then for the past ten years
right and then for the past ten years I’m out here socially I go like I hang
I’m out here socially I go like I hang
I’m out here socially I go like I hang out in all the places I’ve traveled many
out in all the places I’ve traveled many
out in all the places I’ve traveled many countries I’ve seen men who behave very
countries I’ve seen men who behave very
countries I’ve seen men who behave very differently when it comes to comparing
differently when it comes to comparing
differently when it comes to comparing our Indian men right
our Indian men right
our Indian men right you must be wondering is Deepa gonna
you must be wondering is Deepa gonna
you must be wondering is Deepa gonna lecture on Indian men today absolutely
lecture on Indian men today absolutely
lecture on Indian men today absolutely yes I am we are like you know going to
yes I am we are like you know going to
yes I am we are like you know going to definitely get Indian men hi I totally
definitely get Indian men hi I totally
definitely get Indian men hi I totally agree that all night you know we cannot
agree that all night you know we cannot
agree that all night you know we cannot change the Indian man stance of finding
change the Indian man stance of finding
change the Indian man stance of finding the fair slim can cook canteen you know
the fair slim can cook canteen you know
the fair slim can cook canteen you know ideal wife scenarios to dating a
ideal wife scenarios to dating a
ideal wife scenarios to dating a difference but when I was out here you
difference but when I was out here you
difference but when I was out here you know when I start experiencing the world
know when I start experiencing the world
know when I start experiencing the world I was thinking what is so different in
I was thinking what is so different in
I was thinking what is so different in our society that we can never break away
our society that we can never break away
our society that we can never break away from patterns we can never break away
from patterns we can never break away
from patterns we can never break away from ceará types it doesn’t matter how
from ceará types it doesn’t matter how
from ceará types it doesn’t matter how you how how much you are out there still
you how how much you are out there still
you how how much you are out there still you are biased and stereotyped
disqualifier for having a romantic
disqualifier for having a romantic partner or for having my mom of course
partner or for having my mom of course
partner or for having my mom of course is very protective she’s protected me
is very protective she’s protected me
is very protective she’s protected me you know guarded me you know so well
you know guarded me you know so well
you know guarded me you know so well that she didn’t want and men to say no
that she didn’t want and men to say no
that she didn’t want and men to say no to me so she’s she’s protected me
to me so she’s she’s protected me
to me so she’s she’s protected me sometimes Oh protection also gets into
sometimes Oh protection also gets into
sometimes Oh protection also gets into you right so she’s protecting me so much
you right so she’s protecting me so much
you right so she’s protecting me so much and I’m like how mums
and I’m like how mums
and I’m like how mums our Howard you know men outside
our Howard you know men outside
our Howard you know men outside countries right when when I see a lot of
countries right when when I see a lot of
countries right when when I see a lot of my friends in the US or the other
my friends in the US or the other
my friends in the US or the other countries I have seen them reading very
countries I have seen them reading very
countries I have seen them reading very normal life
normal life
normal life women with the same severe condition as
women with the same severe condition as
women with the same severe condition as mine
mine
mine have families have boyfriends have
have families have boyfriends have
have families have boyfriends have children have been there have done it
and when we look at a global scenario 51
and when we look at a global scenario 51 out of 50 men right just one men out of
out of 50 men right just one men out of
out of 50 men right just one men out of 50 would go ahead and date of women with
50 would go ahead and date of women with
50 would go ahead and date of women with disability this is a global figure my
disability this is a global figure my
disability this is a global figure my chances would have been even more better
chances would have been even more better
chances would have been even more better if I was in another country my chances
if I was in another country my chances
if I was in another country my chances of getting hitched would have been
of getting hitched would have been
of getting hitched would have been amazing if I was among the black white
amazing if I was among the black white
amazing if I was among the black white men country like is Indian men scared to
men country like is Indian men scared to
men country like is Indian men scared to date me is Indian men scared or
date me is Indian men scared or
date me is Indian men scared or patronized all terrified about this
patronized all terrified about this
patronized all terrified about this young empowered strong powerful women
young empowered strong powerful women
young empowered strong powerful women maybe with me a slight differentiator of
maybe with me a slight differentiator of
maybe with me a slight differentiator of disability are Indian them our indian
disability are Indian them our indian
disability are Indian them our indian men scared of women who are empowered
men scared of women who are empowered
men scared of women who are empowered who are powerful and were out there are
who are powerful and were out there are
who are powerful and were out there are Indian men scare scare to day to us I
Indian men scare scare to day to us I
Indian men scare scare to day to us I have to ask this question back again and
have to ask this question back again and
have to ask this question back again and again so so today I’m gonna educate
again so so today I’m gonna educate
again so so today I’m gonna educate Indian men of dating and women with
Indian men of dating and women with
Indian men of dating and women with disability first of all you get a
disability first of all you get a
disability first of all you get a different flavor different perspective
different flavor different perspective
different flavor different perspective different idea and you break the pattern
different idea and you break the pattern
different idea and you break the pattern when you experience something different
when you experience something different
when you experience something different and we all agree with that different
and we all agree with that different
and we all agree with that different experiences is what we look for right
experiences is what we look for right
experiences is what we look for right so groundbreaking like ground rule
so groundbreaking like ground rule
so groundbreaking like ground rule number one it’s about love and when we
number one it’s about love and when we
number one it’s about love and when we are there on the table it’s about
are there on the table it’s about
are there on the table it’s about knowing you knowing me time and let’s
knowing you knowing me time and let’s
knowing you knowing me time and let’s not assume things let’s not take away
not assume things let’s not take away
not assume things let’s not take away the gun
the gun
the gun ahead to make conclusions right away
ahead to make conclusions right away
ahead to make conclusions right away it’s about conversation it’s about how
it’s about conversation it’s about how
it’s about conversation it’s about how do you take one step at a time right
do you take one step at a time right
do you take one step at a time right and we even know better each other when
and we even know better each other when
and we even know better each other when we start the conversation one step
we start the conversation one step
we start the conversation one step slowly understanding each other so it is
slowly understanding each other so it is
slowly understanding each other so it is about no you know me time rule number
about no you know me time rule number
about no you know me time rule number two is you don’t want to like you know
two is you don’t want to like you know
two is you don’t want to like you know talk about things like intimacy right on
talk about things like intimacy right on
talk about things like intimacy right on the first date on a larger scenario
the first date on a larger scenario
the first date on a larger scenario people with disability or physical
people with disability or physical
people with disability or physical disability can have amazing intimacy
disability can have amazing intimacy
disability can have amazing intimacy experiences and definitely it’s not
experiences and definitely it’s not
experiences and definitely it’s not going to be your mind like a blocker in
going to be your mind like a blocker in
going to be your mind like a blocker in the relationship it’s about probably
the relationship it’s about probably
the relationship it’s about probably knowing what works best for both so you
knowing what works best for both so you
knowing what works best for both so you don’t have to talk about it at the day
don’t have to talk about it at the day
don’t have to talk about it at the day one it’s fine and you have to understand
one it’s fine and you have to understand
one it’s fine and you have to understand if someone is dating and you know
if someone is dating and you know
if someone is dating and you know wanting to be dated I think the biggest
wanting to be dated I think the biggest
wanting to be dated I think the biggest you know motion or success of a dating
you know motion or success of a dating
you know motion or success of a dating definitely is the physical intimacy so I
definitely is the physical intimacy so I
definitely is the physical intimacy so I think it is given but you don’t have to
think it is given but you don’t have to
think it is given but you don’t have to have like a questionnaire of it rule
have like a questionnaire of it rule
have like a questionnaire of it rule number two of course I love surprises
number two of course I love surprises
number two of course I love surprises gifts I am the all of it right yeah we
gifts I am the all of it right yeah we
gifts I am the all of it right yeah we all love that yes so that’s rule number
all love that yes so that’s rule number
all love that yes so that’s rule number three I think Indian men needs to no
three I think Indian men needs to no
three I think Indian men needs to no surprises and gives her the must yeah
surprises and gives her the must yeah
surprises and gives her the must yeah and rule number four
it’s about me and not about my
it’s about me and not about my wheelchair I understand when I enter a
wheelchair I understand when I enter a
wheelchair I understand when I enter a room it’s mostly about the wheelchair
room it’s mostly about the wheelchair
room it’s mostly about the wheelchair don’t patronize do not patronize about
don’t patronize do not patronize about
don’t patronize do not patronize about about me my achievements I don’t need
about me my achievements I don’t need
about me my achievements I don’t need the smothering around me I don’t need
the smothering around me I don’t need
the smothering around me I don’t need how confident I am how intelligent I am
how confident I am how intelligent I am
how confident I am how intelligent I am how progressive I am I do not smother
how progressive I am I do not smother
how progressive I am I do not smother that and you know smothering or
that and you know smothering or
that and you know smothering or patronizing me isn’t a very is it a very
patronizing me isn’t a very is it a very
patronizing me isn’t a very is it a very you know cheerful thing in honor dating
you know cheerful thing in honor dating
you know cheerful thing in honor dating right I think it is about empowering or
right I think it is about empowering or
right I think it is about empowering or it is about conversation which is more
it is about conversation which is more
it is about conversation which is more lively right that’s rule number one
lively right that’s rule number one
lively right that’s rule number one and the last rule the fifth rule of
and the last rule the fifth rule of
and the last rule the fifth rule of course when you see all these rules I
course when you see all these rules I
course when you see all these rules I think it definitely matches any woman
think it definitely matches any woman
think it definitely matches any woman who wants to date do you guys want to be
who wants to date do you guys want to be
who wants to date do you guys want to be smothered saying how beautiful then how
smothered saying how beautiful then how
smothered saying how beautiful then how lovely always you are or do you want to
lovely always you are or do you want to
lovely always you are or do you want to have a lovely conversation saying okay
have a lovely conversation saying okay
have a lovely conversation saying okay that’s you know explore this let’s go
that’s you know explore this let’s go
that’s you know explore this let’s go around you know we want to have those
around you know we want to have those
around you know we want to have those kind of conversations so the only thing
kind of conversations so the only thing
kind of conversations so the only thing that I would you know which
that I would you know which
that I would you know which differentiates or a slight
differentiates or a slight
differentiates or a slight differentiator would be do not overdo my
differentiator would be do not overdo my
differentiator would be do not overdo my wheelchair I know I have attracted more
wheelchair I know I have attracted more
wheelchair I know I have attracted more kids below five years and more men below
kids below five years and more men below
kids below five years and more men below thirty about thirty five years only to
thirty about thirty five years only to
thirty about thirty five years only to my wheels and my joystick right please
my wheels and my joystick right please
my wheels and my joystick right please it’s about me and not about my
it’s about me and not about my
it’s about me and not about my wheelchair always nice and these are
wheelchair always nice and these are
wheelchair always nice and these are some of the ground breaking rules that
some of the ground breaking rules that
some of the ground breaking rules that you should go ahead and you know get
you should go ahead and you know get
you should go ahead and you know get someone hooked to and I know I’ve been
someone hooked to and I know I’ve been
someone hooked to and I know I’ve been you know like trolling on Indian men but
you know like trolling on Indian men but
you know like trolling on Indian men but down design sometimes it is about you it
down design sometimes it is about you it
down design sometimes it is about you it is about oneself on what how you want to
is about oneself on what how you want to
is about oneself on what how you want to love yourself I think that goes a long
love yourself I think that goes a long
love yourself I think that goes a long long way right and today I am here to
long way right and today I am here to
long way right and today I am here to break away the pattern but
break away the pattern but
break away the pattern but I think I have embraced myself well I
I think I have embraced myself well I
I think I have embraced myself well I think I can you know get to the next
think I can you know get to the next
think I can you know get to the next stage I would definitely want a man who
stage I would definitely want a man who
stage I would definitely want a man who can take care of me love me you know be
can take care of me love me you know be
can take care of me love me you know be with me and I hope I can grow old with
with me and I hope I can grow old with
with me and I hope I can grow old with him as well right this is what I look
him as well right this is what I look
him as well right this is what I look forward to but at the same time I’m not
forward to but at the same time I’m not
forward to but at the same time I’m not breaking away from myself because it’s
breaking away from myself because it’s
breaking away from myself because it’s about loving oneself it is about knowing
about loving oneself it is about knowing
about loving oneself it is about knowing you know the life
you know the life
you know the life it’s about flirting with life so you
it’s about flirting with life so you
it’s about flirting with life so you know the ground rule again for everyone
know the ground rule again for everyone
know the ground rule again for everyone here is it’s about exploring different
here is it’s about exploring different
here is it’s about exploring different aspects of life you get different
aspects of life you get different
aspects of life you get different perspective you get a lot of things into
perspective you get a lot of things into
perspective you get a lot of things into your life as it enriches you so I think
your life as it enriches you so I think
your life as it enriches you so I think I think today I am here on a great idea
I think today I am here on a great idea
I think today I am here on a great idea – you know flirt this evening so I hope
– you know flirt this evening so I hope
– you know flirt this evening so I hope you all around to get some extra drinks
you all around to get some extra drinks
you all around to get some extra drinks and we get going thank you
and we get going thank you
and we get going thank you [Applause]
”
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